Why do men 37 yrs and up start to look like my grandpa?

[burning 4 revenge]

This is exactly what I am talking about, men after a certain age just lose touch with anything remotely current, this makes them appear a lot older than they actually are.

 

I like all the excuses that people are saying here for being married and not working out and staying fit. I have many married couple friends in my group of friends and family they range everywhere in age from early 30's to early 40's all the men and women in my group are fit, they find time to go to the gym and have been doing so since their kids were babies.

 

There is no excuse for letting yourself go, no excuse whatsoever, I see living proof of young parents who make time for themselves to look after their appearance and if they can do it a single man in his late 30's and early 40's can too. This applies to women as well.

 

No excuse, sorry.

I think home exercise equipment is a pretty good option for busy people....yo have to admit it is tough to get to the gym when youre so busy

[Jersey Shortie]

Read a book or rent a movie, I'm not here to entertain you. I'm here to discuss my observation and to tackle an answer to my original question.

 

Of course you are hear to entertain me! That's the whole point of the board.

 

You already have your mind made up. This is less about tackling answers and more about exerting your own opinion. Which is fine. But at least be honest about it. And when people disagree, *attempting* to smack them down rudely isn't about answering questions.

 

It is particular to gender. Most women in my age group would agree, as you have already seen here by the responses, even men in the same age group agree because they feel they themselves stand out in a sea of 40 yr old grandpappies.

 

That's not what I got from this thread at all. What was sais that both men and women have the ability to look good or bad. I do not disagree that some older men can not take care of themselves and look older. However, it's really not gender specfic.

 

When I was younger I didn't notice either, much like yourself. It was either the guys in and around my age group I noticed or everyone else who was just "older". When you get older you realize how you change over the years vs others and it is a huge eye opener to what happens to men after a certain age.

 

This isn't a matter of me not noticing. Infact, I notice very well. Like you, I have eyes. We share that.

 

I've dated my fair share of older men. Infact, I've dated more older men then men my age. I don't only p ay attention to just men my age.

[Twenty-ten]

So maybe instead of crtizing men, we should promote a climate that makes them feel like they CAN take care of themselves and ask for help and not be less of a man for it.

 

 

You mean like the inviting climate women have had to live in for decades, no centuries, of advertising and fashions ideals seen in marketing, magazines and porn that promote anorexia and bulimia in order to achieve a perfect youthful physical appearance? Some women have embraced the societal expectations and are on board with what is expected of them, men should do the same. Surely we don't need to start objectifying men through our advertising and media in order for them to clue in, or do we?

 

How much more of a buffer do do we need to protect our men an nurture them into compliance and make them see that leading a healthy lifestyle that translates into a healthy appearance and mental state, and a youthful outlook is appealing to the opposite sex? Men were and are primarily responsible for conceptualizing this notion, so why do so many of them not realize this also applies to them when the tables are turned on them?

[Shygirl15]

Why is it that men over 35 start to look really old. Men over 40, forget it.

Not all of them. Asians and blacks age much better than other races, in my opinion. Especially Asians. They actually look good at any age. Others.. well, forget it.

[Twenty-ten]

I think home exercise equipment is a pretty good option for busy people....yo have to admit it is tough to get to the gym when youre so busy

 

There is always home work out videos, no excuse, half an hour a day.

[burning 4 revenge]

Not all of them. Asians and blacks age much better than other races, in my opinion. Especially Asians. They actually look good at any age. Others.. well, forget it.

Blacks look better, but they have more health problems earlier than caucasians.

 

Asians age terrificly. I think it has as much to do with diet as it does genetics

[Twenty-ten]

Not all of them. Asians and blacks age much better than other races, in my opinion. Especially Asians. They actually look good at any age. Others.. well, forget it.

 

 

Totally agree!

[Twenty-ten]

 

Now admittedly, this has lots to do with the stresses of pregnancy, but in most cases I see, the woman makes little effort to get back her body after children. And while we are at it, men accept this fairly gracefully as part of becoming a family. Wonder what the result would be if I started a thread "Why do women who have had children start to look like my grandma?" The replies to that thread wouldn't be pretty, would they?

 

Give it a go and see, what can I say?

 

So what is it, do you not like topics that challenge the male portion of society? I find it ironic that you seem to be really stuck on this topic since I've read your comments in other threads and when people complain about women bashing or nice guys you defend freedom of expression for men and their opinions and you try to appeal to people's rationale by pleading with them to "let these men have a voice"

 

 

I think you should start a topic about it, you have been propagating your views on how older women are undesirable and what other crude and immature sexual comments you made earlier, so the best course of action for you is to start your own thread topic where you can also express your own personal views about older women. Or we can keep discussing it here but please stop with the "what if I started a thread like this?" questions. Just do it and stop asking about it and figure it out.

 

I wished to discuss why men age prematurely and let themselves go, so I did. It would be interesting to see what the responses would be if you do initiate that topic you just suggested about women.

 

As I said earlier, in my social network of friends and family all the women who had babies gained weight during pregnancy they lost it all within the first year. It's not an option to let yourself go, the men are held to the same standards therefore both the men and women look equally good and proportionate in age. Fair is fair. If I am dating someone younger than me it is because I don't feel the eligible men older than me are the equivalent of what I have to offer, in terms of overall appeal. Believe me I tried, and would have loved nothing more than to meet a man in his 40's who looked his age, just wasn't my experience.

[Twenty-ten]

Define "anything remotely current." Would that include computers, gadgets or anything involving technology? quality music? automobiles, or the internet by chance? Will give you the opportunity to bow out of the above statement gracefully, and won't even get into who actually creates or invents most of what is "current." I'm nice like that

 

Yes all of the above and 21 year old guys that's who. I know 21 yr old guys are hip you don't need to remind me of that, it's the 40 somethings that are dry and boring.

 

Now about that curtsy, put on a skirt, it will be that much more enjoyable if you are wearing a skirt and knee high sockies.

[BG1985]

As people age, women put more of a premium on looking good than men. A lot of guys figure that if they can demonstrate earning power/potential and have ambition in their careers, that will make them desirable. That's a good thing, but it also leads to the decline in other area of their life.

 

Many of these guys become slaves to their careers, putting in 80+ hour work weeks. This puts stress on their bodies through lack of exercise and on their mind through putting themselves through constant mental hell. This is how men can also become boring. I see it happening to some of my friends already at the age of 24. Their job is their life. It's their self-identity. It's all they talk about, whether at the bar with friends or at tailgates for football games. They think their job at the bank interests others.

 

While women may view it as a curse for society to favor staying toned and in shape, it's a blessing for women as well because they have more options for staying in shape. A guy is considered gay or metrosexual for staying in shape, doing yoga, taking care of his appearance, and buying nice clothes. We somehow have this concept the "macho man" being a beer-swilling overweight guy who loathes the gym. However this may come from the fact that a lot of guys could stay in shape while eating/drinking whatever they want and not exercising a single day of their life. Eventually they lose their metabolism and are stuck with absolutely no concept of exercise. It also doesn't help when guys consider Men's Health to be the male equivalent of Cosmo, when there are lot of a good tips for eating well and exercising.

 

I am writing this as a guy. I'm not exactly in tip-top shape right now, but I recognize that and am doing something to fix the problem. Guys need to enjoy life more and not live as a slave to their boss. This will help.

[soserious1]

But no, there is no strawman in the bed with me and my young nursey, what made you think that? Is your eyesight as bad as your repartee?

 

Nice try though. I'm not going... anywhere!

 

Now, let's continue with those frown lines, and turn that frown upside down! .

 

Funny how certain wrinkles look so good on men, but literally ruin a woman's face, let alone cause nasty concealer rivulets and all sorts of makeup trauma. Have been dragged along on two botox appointments by GFs in my life and the look of raw desperation on the faces of the clientele in the packed waiting room was priceless. Wait?! None of the people in the waiting room was a man? either visit? Wonder why that is?

 

I guess men become more and more secure in their looks in direct proportion to women becoming more and more insecure in theirs through life. Sounds -real- promising for men as we age, and well, frankly, not so promising for women.

 

Sounds like I just answered the question of the thread title, "Why do men 37 yrs and up start to look like my grandpa?"

 

Because we can!

 

YOU ARE 100% CORRECT

 

I'm a woman in my early 50's and I can admit without hesitation that my ex hubby is now bedding a woman 23 yrs my junior, a hot, tight bodied woman with a smooth unlined face.

 

I get to sit here alone, staring in the mirror at my haggard,wrinkled ugly old face knowing that the only way I'll get a date or sex is if I pay for it.

 

The hard part of all of this? is knowing that I could easily live another 35-40 yrs, growing more physically repulsive with each passing day.

 

Sorry ladies, by and large it's a man's world and younger women rule the day.

[shadowplay]

I don't think women age any worse than men for the most part. The only difference is that they kind of hit a wall of age at 50 or so where they're no longer considered attractive by most of society. Men often hit this wall a bit later.

 

The wall of age phenomenon also applies to Asian vs. Caucasian women. Asians age better up to a certain point, but hit a wall of age earlier than their white counterparts. Consider the little, shrivelled Asian ladies you see all over the Chinese sections of cities. I think this has to do with the fleshy flatness of their faces, which collapses after a certain age. Blacks seem to age the best in general (at least on the outside). They never really hit that wall.

 

But in my opinion both genders look their best in their 20s -- an age when they're fully adults but have the potency and freshness that goes along with youth.

[MissJoness]

YOU ARE 100% CORRECT

 

I'm a woman in my early 50's and I can admit without hesitation that my ex hubby is now bedding a woman 23 yrs my junior, a hot, tight bodied woman with a smooth unlined face.

 

I get to sit here alone, staring in the mirror at my haggard,wrinkled ugly old face knowing that the only way I'll get a date or sex is if I pay for it.

 

The hard part of all of this? is knowing that I could easily live another 35-40 yrs, growing more physically repulsive with each passing day.

 

Sorry ladies, by and large it's a man's world and younger women rule the day.

Is this a real post?

 

Early 50s is kinda young to be looking that haggardly. do you have very pale skin?

[MissJoness]

Blacks seem to age the best in general (at least on the outside). They never really hit that wall.

 

But in my opinion both genders look their best in their 20s -- an age when they're fully adults but have the potency and freshness that goes along with youth.

 

Yeah my sister is in her early 30s and looks the exact same as she did in her 20s. There is no difference at all.

 

At least i have something to look forward to but even though I'm black I still worry about aging

[Woggle]

I am up on all the new technology but who the hell cares about Brtney and Justin. They are two talentless pop stars that get by on their looks. If you ask me with a few exceptions mainstream music died the day Hit me baby one more time aired on MTV. Not being current with current music is a good thing in my book because it sucks.

 

Why do you act offended by the fact that some men as they age couldn't care less about vanity? How does it affect your life in anyway? I don't go to the supermarket and complain about all the ugly women. If they are happy that way more power to them. I just don't see why this upsets you so much.

[meerkat stew]

So what is it, do you not like topics that challenge the male portion of society? I find it ironic that you seem to be really stuck on this topic since I've read your comments in other threads and when people complain about women bashing or nice guys you defend freedom of expression for men and their opinions and you try to appeal to people's rationale by pleading with them to "let these men have a voice"

 

Freedom of expression is great. It's what allows me to disagree with asinine generalizations about how men age versus women based on the looks of a couple of your FB friends. Express and generalize how you like, I LOVE to make a good, solid generalization, but if your generalization is based on 1) two dudes on FB, and 2) a false premise (that being women age generally better than men, which is patently inaccurate), then expect to be called out on it.

 

It's just a plain fact that all other things being equal, men age better than women. Male actors and models have longer careers for this exact reason. Men don't generally spend billions of dollars on anti-aging measures for this exact reason. Men don't go through pregnancy or menopause. Men's stronger bones and heavier musculature degrade into goo a bit slower than women's. Men don't have to deal with as many sources of localized fat deposits as women do. etc. etc.

 

The above is just reciting facts, very well and broadly known -facts-. Continue banging your thread drum based on two dudes on FB all you like, but it doesn't change the facts.

 

Now if I could trade you my shorter male lifespan and take your aging worse in exchange, I'd gladly make that trade. But it doesn't work that way. Men and women are different, and one of those differences is that all other things equal, we can more easily hold on to the appearance of youth better than women. I would take a few more years of life myself and be more subject to the ravages of aging, but that's just the way things are.

 

I think you should start a topic about it... but please stop with the "what if I started a thread like this?"

 

I thought about it, but decided against it as it would just bring me down to your level. As far as immature comments I may have made here, that's pot kettle based on your snarky dismissive tone to several posters in the thread. Enjoy the double-think, but anyone who reads this thread can easily tell where the real immaturity lies.

 

And with respect to "go make your thread quit asking," I brought that up exactly -once-. Put down the pipe, your high is showing.

[prettybaby]

So is your user name, you don't hear anyone complaining about that.

Indeed, I never do

[meerkat stew]

Yes all of the above and 21 year old guys that's who. I know 21 yr old guys are hip you don't need to remind me of that, it's the 40 somethings that are dry and boring.

 

Now about that curtsy, put on a skirt, it will be that much more enjoyable if you are wearing a skirt and knee high sockies.

 

Haha, you didn't let it drop. So only the 20 y.o. guys are up on "what's current?" Is that a fact? Is your world that shallow that you don't realize that literally -everything- that is based on technology, including the television that broadcasts your insipid soap operas and talk shows, radio that broadcasts your vapid top 40 music, magazines that publish your irritating tabloid gossip and vain fashion trends, medicine that provides your birth control, computers that broadcast your weakly reasoned posts here on this forum, etc. All were created or invented by men? Most of those men over 40?

 

Do you really want to stick with the statement that "men over 40 don't keep current?" Really? If so then please define exactly what you are referring to by "keeping current," this should be good.

[txsilkysmoothe]

Some people, male and female, age better than others. period.

 

How well one ages is largely out of his/her control.

[Twenty-ten]

Freedom of expression is great. It's what allows me to disagree with asinine generalizations about how men age versus women based on the looks of a couple of your FB friends. Express and generalize how you like, I LOVE to make a good, solid generalization, but if your generalization is based on 1) two dudes on FB, and 2) a false premise (that being women age generally better than men, which is patently inaccurate), then expect to be called out on it.

 

 

Great then learn to express yourself without having to strategically sprinkle all your posts with personal insults to flower up your otherwise very weak points. My observation is based on society not two men who shocked me on FB, that was just a personal example of how men just don't take care of themselves, and as I mentioned earlier I saw the "before" of these men they had potential to be a lot more when they hit 40. They dropped the ball, and really let themselves go. As I see a lot of men do once they get into the high 30's. Clearly I am not the only woman on this earth who has noticed this. Nor will I be the last.

 

 

It's just a plain fact that all other things being equal, men age better than women. Male actors and models have longer careers for this exact reason.

The double standard that has been existent in the media, even if you look at news casters they will cast very old male anchors but women have a shelf life, is predomantly attributed to the fact that for the most part the media and Hollywood has been and is male dominated. Up until a decade ago this was prevalent even in pornography where they cast disgusting men with beautiful women to star in films simply because it feeds the male ego, which coincidentally is also an industry created by and for men.

 

Again, very weak argument based on emotion not facts, Meerkatstew.

 

So don't tell me it's because men age better, it's has zilch to do with that. Ron Jeremy is the epitome of the middle aged man that looked that way even in his thirties. Point made.

Now a days with the increase of women consuming porn the standards have change somewhat an there is more variety in this respect, and it is sloooooowly changing in the media as well, as more women are gaining some administrative power. We still have a long way to go. I have any more desire to see Morley Safer tell me a 5 min investigative report than I do Barbara Walters, and it's not because Morley looks better than Babawawa, but moreso because I just want my news and I give a rat's ass who gives it to me, so long as it is credible source I don't need it delivered in a sexy package. Tell that to advertisers who are pulling the plugs on shows left and right and still insisting it's sex that sell. For some ridiculous reason the macho media standards dictate that that even our news has to be delivered by some youthful sex vixen because men left to their own devices would have Penthouse Pets reciting Sunday mass. Come to think of it this might just work to incite society to turn themselves to religion again.

 

Again weak example, media gets rid of aging women and replaces them with youthful sex kittens and keep crumpled up dudes on tv because sex sells and the one dimensional suckers buying into the whole thing are well....you guessed it, MEN. Who ages better doesn't even factor into the equation when it comes to network advertising meetings. Cha-ching! Is all they want to hear. But again, this is changing as women are becoming more equal consumers.

 

Men don't generally spend billions of dollars on anti-aging measures for this exact reason. Men don't go through pregnancy or menopause. Men's stronger bones and heavier musculature degrade into goo a bit slower than women's. Men don't have to deal with as many sources of localized fat deposits as women do. etc. etc

Perfect points, which also illustrate even more of a reason for there being NO excuse whatsoever for a 35 yr old guy to look like he is 50. None.

Women have more things working against and a lot of them still manage to retain their youthful appeal.

 

I thought about it, but decided against it as it would just bring me down to your level. As far as immature comments I may have made here, that's pot kettle based on your snarky dismissive tone to several posters in the thread. Enjoy the double-think, but anyone who reads this thread can easily tell where the real immaturity lies

And with respect to "go make your thread quit asking," I brought that up exactly -once-. Put down the pipe, your high is showing.

Oh pshaw, you are all about stooping, in fact you stoop so low at times I think you can practically taste your own balls.

(Couldn't resist the interjection of insults, I learned that from the best, Tiger!)

 

I only get snarky and insulting when people insult me personally, it's only fair. You do the same. Otherwise I am very happy to discuss the concept I have proposed and leave the personal insults out.

 

Deal?

[Twenty-ten]

Haha, you didn't let it drop. So only the 20 y.o. guys are up on "what's current?" Is that a fact? Is your world that shallow that you don't realize that literally -everything- that is based on technology, including the television that broadcasts your insipid soap operas and talk shows, radio that broadcasts your vapid top 40 music, magazines that publish your irritating tabloid gossip and vain fashion trends, medicine that provides your birth control, computers that broadcast your weakly reasoned posts here on this forum, etc. All were created or invented by men? Most of those men over 40?

 

Do you really want to stick with the statement that "men over 40 don't keep current?" Really? If so then please define exactly what you are referring to by "keeping current," this should be good.

 

You asked me to define "staying current" and asked me who comes up with a lot of the fresh concepts in technology, automobile, and other gadgets of current interest and I said 21 yr old guys. Of course it's not just 21 yr old guys but a lot of the top technology billionaire gurus were in their 20's when they launched their concepts. Anything that is current and hip was pretty much created by a young guy, Napster (that's old now), FB, BizChair, MySpace, Gary Vaynerchuck, all the Apple apps, are a few that come to mind of youth being behind it. Of course music is dominated by young people as well. Older men know how to run a business but young men come up with the hip concepts. It's the way it is.

 

Someone said earlier that not being up with music is a good thing because now a days it is all bad music anyway, that is the first sign that someone has lost touch with what is current and cool and has stepped into the geriatric zone. There is a sht load of great cool music being made today you just have to get with the times and appreciate it. If you wont and only reject it on principle alone you are officially too old for your own good. I don't mean Britney Spears and JT, I mean good music that can appeal to those of any age.

Edited February 3, 2010 by Twenty-ten

[meerkat stew]

Great then learn to express yourself without having to strategically sprinkle all your posts with personal insults to flower up your otherwise very weak points.

 

blablabla more pot kettle black, except for the weak points part, let's see about that:

 

My observation is based on society not two men who shocked me on FB,

 

Backpedal much? Why did you emphasize those few anecdotal FB guys in your OP then if you had better, more "societal" evidence. I know why, because you are trying to retroactively rationalize a poor generalization that you know doesn't hold water.

 

The double standard ... is predomantly attributed to the fact that for the most part the media and Hollywood has been and is male dominated.

 

Wrong, Hollywood and the media are not male dominated, but rather -money- dominated. The media pitches what sells, and pitches it over and over and over again, and older men remain more saleable longer because they look better due to the noncontroversial reasons for such posted by me previously.

 

Up until a decade ago this was prevalent even in pornography where they cast disgusting men with beautiful women to star in films simply because it feeds the male ego, which coincidentally is also an industry created by and for men.

 

So you're talking Ron Jeremy and who else exactly as these "disgusting male porn stars?" :lmao: I haven't watched porn much over the last two decades, but do know a) there have always been plenty of studly looking, buff, tan guys in porn, and b) standards of BOTH male and female attractiveness in porn have risen greatly over the years as the industry has become more mainstream. Who brought up porn anyway? Not me.

 

Again, very weak argument based on emotion not facts, Meerkatstew.

 

"Yawn," I'm in second gear here, you got nothing.

 

So don't tell me it's because men age better, it's has zilch to do with that. Ron Jeremy is the epitome of the middle aged man that looked that way even in his thirties. Point made.

 

That's exactly -one- 56 y.o. man with a HUGE d*ck even by industry standards and a very funny stage presence. The guy was the Jerry Lewis of early porn. Once more, name some more of these disgusting male porn stars. You can't because they don't exist. Point... lost.

 

And enough about porn, the rest of your commentary about newscasters?!? completely irrelevant and ignored.

 

media gets rid of aging women and replaces them with youthful sex kittens and keep crumpled up dudes on tv because sex sells and the one dimensional suckers buying into the whole thing are well....you guessed it, MEN...But again, this is changing as women are becoming more equal consumers.

 

So you are saying that -men- are the primary audience of romantic drama and comedy on television and in the movies? that -men- somehow keep older men on the air and screen somehow? Sure about that? Let's just admit that you are talking out of your ass, that women are the primary audience for TV and screen romantic comedy and drama, and men have a longer shelf life than women in entertainment as leading romantic roles.

 

Most of this is due to maintaining looks. God only knows the millions and millions spent on keeping women camera worthy over the years until it just isn't doable any more, what do you think Harrison Ford, Paul Newman, Cary Grant, James Stewart, etc. etc. spent in comparison? Where is the age equivalent female version of Paul Newman or Clint Eastwood? Name em.

 

Perfect points, which also illustrate even more of a reason for there being NO excuse whatsoever for a 35 yr old guy to look like he is 50. None.

Women have more things working against and a lot of them still manage to retain their youthful appeal.

 

And since you freely admit above that men in fact do age better generally than women, we are done here... for the time being until you figure out a way to back out of what you just stated.

Edited February 3, 2010 by meerkat stew

[Twenty-ten]

Your hair piece must have unglued and fallen over your eyes for that last post because it read like complete and utter rubbish.

I already explained why I brought up the two FB x's, go back and read what I wrote instead of wasting everyone's time with posts like your last one.

 

Anyway a lot of men around 40 look like they are 60, that was my point. Chop chop, less talk and more work and some of you men won't take it so personally when someone says that.

[Woggle]

I don't reject new artists based on principal alone. I love a lot of new stuff that for some reason remains underground and appeals to a niche market. New music is actually mind numbingly conservative. While older artists from the 60s/70s/80s and even 90s pushed themselves to experiment and find new sounds new artists just do paint by numbers music to get played on the radio. It all sounds the same and I know many people in their 20s that prefer the older stuff. Britney Spears has been making the same song over and over again for the past 10 years. This is actually the most conservative music era since before rock and roll.

 

 

Also like I said in the spray tan thread if this is what is in style today I am glad to be getting older.

[meerkat stew]

You asked me to define "staying current" and asked me who comes up with a lot of the fresh concepts in technology, automobile, and other gadgets of current interest and I said 21 yr old guys.

 

I don't agree, but for the sake of argument, who exactly do you think puts up the money for all these brilliant ideas coming out of these 21 y.o. heads? Did they just jingle the coins out of their 21 y.o. jeans? Who decides what is a fresh, workable idea and what is not? More 21 y.o. guys? or rather 40-50 something guys who have already made it and are reinvesting their fortunes? Likely some guy who was too busy busting his ass for 16 hours a day, building a business or raising a family, to "stay current."

 

And most importantly, what does the fact that young people come up with good ideas have to do with 40 something dudes staying current? Nada?

 

I don't mean Britney Spears and JT, I mean good music that can appeal to those of any age.

 

I don't see it, at least not in mainstream music. Name some, maybe I will add a station to the 15 or so I already have programmed on pandora.

 

What you really meant was that men don't stay current with what women and teenagers are into (usually the same types of things), that subtext is very clear. If you would just admit that, I would agree with you.

 

You see, we grown men have more important things going on than tabloids, reality shows, and whatever the vid du jour is on youtube, as in "being current" with what really matters in the world we are busy inventing and creating.