carhill Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 This is why women should marry younger men. It evens things out. Question: Amongst LS'ers, who is or has family members who are/have been married 32 (using my parents as an example) or more years? I seriously doubt many in my generation or the younger ones will ever outlive a spouse by natural causes. None of my friends ever will, as none are still married to their first spouse except one, and she's barely 40. Predominantly, if statistics are to be believed, people will divorce first, or break up if not married. The best lesson marriage taught me is that nothing is forever and one shouldn't make plans with forever in mind. Today is where life is and, whether it be a much younger/older man or a much younger/older woman, the synergy is in the moment. Link to post Share on other sites
SincereOnlineGuy Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I just started recently on the dating sites. What I am finding the most frustrating is the guys on there who are my age (38) wont even have a look at me - they all want the 20yr olds. BTW I dont look my age in the least bit - I could pass for late 20's early 30's. On that note too - I get like 50yr old & 60yr old men messaging me!!! Really!! Why would I want to go out with someone who could be my father? Its just so frustrating - what goes through your guys minds? Do you really think you have a chance? I am in in no way looking for a sugar daddy - I just want to meet someone close to my age (I would entertain 6-7 years older or younger than me) I just wanted some insight as I am new to the online dating world after being recently divorced after 17yrs of marriage. In the early 1990's men were surveyed as to what age they would find 'ideal' in a partner. The answer, in a format suitable for all, was: "half his own age plus seven years". SO, it is absolutely normal and to be expected that 60yo men are 'seeking' you. This has nothing to do with "online" dating, and to a lesser extent, it doesn't have much to do with their "having a chance" either. It's just what men, on "average" prefer. Now I'm not saying that I match that math personally, but I certainly acknowledge from where it comes... Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 "That men think they have more worth and are better then women. Whenever I hear older men talk about how “why shouldn’t I go for younger women”, “older men age better”, “older men are better”, “older women are ugly”, “after 30 women are worthless”" I am attracted to women of all ages. I met a 54 year old jewish woman (thought she was Iranian, whoops lol) at my job the other day and she rocked my fing world. I loved her face, body, smile, persona, accent and the way she smelled and carried herself. I could of been putty in her hands at the snap of her fingers. So not all men think like that but lets say she wasn't married. I'm 30 so I'm supposed to ask her out even though I want to have kids one day? Um...NO Why not? It's called adoption and a lot of kids are in need of good homes. And by the way, you are 30. This is the age when your sperm begins its own decline. Biologically, you are no longer the prime/ first/best option. So why should a woman go for you? This is the question men don't ever want to ask themselves. They want to life in denile about their own bodies. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Women don't owe you babies. I've met men with your plan. They are the same ones trolling the 20 and 30 somethings well into their 40's and 50's then complaining why younger women don't want them. Not saying this to be mean... but saying that your age requirements will make it harder and harder for you to find anyone... much less one who will give you kids. Something to think about. Lol don't owe me babies and give me kids?? Well it takes two to tango sweetheart. I don't want anyone to give me kids. I want to have kids with a woman I am commited to and she is to me and to raise a famitly TOGETHERE so eff your give me and owe me terminology. I have all the right in the world to want children and to want to have one with a women in her fertility prime, READ CLOSER, I said as my age goes up theirs will go up too. This is the first time ive been disappointed in one of you responses that I have read. Link to post Share on other sites
Author blindesided Posted March 28, 2012 Author Share Posted March 28, 2012 Very interesting comments. I have dated in real life (not met online) a guy 10yrs younger than me & also a guy 15 years older than me. My last relationship he was 3 years younger than me. My friend was having an issue - she is 12 years older than the guy she is dating. Even though they have great chemistry - the age thing bothers him - he keeps saying "when I'm 50 you will be 62 - eww gross" WTF - dude that is like 20 years away - you could be dead by then - why worry about 20 years from now?? I was just generalizing that online it seems that msot guys wont give someone their own age a second look which is frustrating - thats why I havent delved too deeply in online dating. Although it is getting tougher & tougher to meet people out & about Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Yeah I logically know I shouldn't but these threads just make me feel like I need to give up on men because clearly everything a woman is as human being is nothing what men want. They want the porn fantsy. They want the young babe. They don't a real person. So I might as well start collecting my cats now and being happy in my hobbies because guys think they are better then women when they are seeking to date younger women while they put women their own age down. Is this not the same attitude that young women have about men...? My counter to all of this nonsense is that older women had their chance to be the "superior beings" in their younger years and do as they pleased with men...either they took advantage of it and still think they're entitled to the same treatment and attention many years later...or they missed the train and grow resentful... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Yeah I logically know I shouldn't but these threads just make me feel like I need to give up on men because clearly everything a woman is as human being is nothing what men want. They want the porn fantsy. They want the young babe. They don't a real person. So I might as well start collecting my cats now and being happy in my hobbies because guys think they are better then women when they are seeking to date younger women while they put women their own age down. I know. It seems that way sometimes. Partly because the a-holes are the most vocal. They are the squeeky wheel. Plus, when you are lonely it is easy to feel unloveable. Lots of people here on LS feel that way for a whole host of reasons. The ones who don't feel that way are just quietly carrying on their business. You just need to find them. Reach out to them, and encourage them. Try not to focus on those other things... it disappears later more than you'd imagine right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Is this not the same attitude that young women have about men...? My counter to all of this nonsense is that older women had their chance to be the "superior beings" in their younger years and do as they pleased with men...either they took advantage of it and still think they're entitled to the same treatment and attention many years later...or they missed the train and grow resentful... I had it up to here with all this nonsense you guys enjoy telling yourselves about how "women had their chance...." and now how "women deserve what htey get for the trail of broken hearts they left in their wake." I haven't left a trail of broken hearts in my wake! yes, I have rejected some men. Yes, I have broken up relationships with men. But I have ALSO been rejected! I have had many boyfriends break up with me! I have been rejected by a wide variety of men with different income/education/body types. I have not only dated young hot buff rich guys! I am so sick of you guys telling yourselves that , "women had their chance" just because YOU have been rejected by pretty women. Or you have seen your friends rejected by pretty women. Yet you don't EVER consider the women that have been rejected, or the men that never followed up to go on dates with a woman again. I do NOT deserve to be punished just because I didn't get married at 21. And I refuse to let men like you tell me what I "missed the train" on. I certainly think it makes you feel better to believe this happens. Because the reality is you don't really like women. You only like women when they offer you youth. But that's not a real like for women as people. That's only about what you get from a woman. I have a full life ahead of me God willing. And I refuse to let men like you tell me my worth just because I didn't fit into the pre-scripted fantasy world you wanted to box me in where I hosuld have been settled down already. And where you tell yourselves I an all to blame for my "circumstances" while you also blame me and other women for yours. Grow up. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Is this not the same attitude that young women have about men...? My counter to all of this nonsense is that older women had their chance to be the "superior beings" in their younger years and do as they pleased with men...either they took advantage of it and still think they're entitled to the same treatment and attention many years later...or they missed the train and grow resentful... you have this mistaken idea that younger women think they are superior and can do as they please with men. They are just as naive as young men... most of them innocently going about their business. They are not trying to torment men. Most young women hate their bodies and themselves. Most would be immensely shocked to think they had any power over anything. Take a look around. I'm also not sure about the 'missing the train'. Most people (especially young ones) are just doing the best with what they are born with and are more-or-less clueless about the effect they have on other people. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Women get upset reading these threads.....but really, you wouldn't want a guy who doesn't think you are a prize, anyway. And lots of men (of many ages) would think you are a prize. Just not necessarily the men arguing with you here. The facts are, younger women are available to date older men. So if a man really wants that, he can probably get it. No use scolding him, or her, for enjoying their dating life. Focus on enjoying your own life, whether dating or not. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I know. It seems that way sometimes. Partly because the a-holes are the most vocal. They are the squeeky wheel. Plus, when you are lonely it is easy to feel unloveable. Lots of people here on LS feel that way for a whole host of reasons. The ones who don't feel that way are just quietly carrying on their business. You just need to find them. Reach out to them, and encourage them. Try not to focus on those other things... it disappears later more than you'd imagine right now. Thanks Red Robin. I guess lately I have been feeling pretty unloveable because my love life has sucked lately and I really hate these guys telling me what I do or don't deserve because other women rejected them. They don't stop to consider that women might go through difficult things to and that not all of us are breaking hearts and being selfish. I also look at my mom who is a widow now and she is 55 years old. She deserves a guy around her age. Not some guy who really wants to bang younger women and just uses her to take up time with or basically think she has less worth then younger women. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
dasein Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Oh yes! Please blame women more about being "proactive" even as you talk about how you will approach the kind of women you really want! Younger ones! Because women being proactive and approaching will certainaly all the sudden make men see women their own age as more beautiful. Yeah. Okay. No one "blamed" women for anything there, only a particular poster's expectation that men should somehow be limited in whom we approach just because she says so, despite the fact that women generally don't suffer the constant mindf-ck that is approaching women today. And FWIW, if women were more proactive, they could certainly go out and approach whomever they like, old, young, fat, skinny, stupid, drunk, doesn't matter to me. I'm not the one dictating who is right or wrong for someone to approach, left my "king o the world" hat at Burger King. Men today are more likely to push a woman over and stomp on her to get off the boat in the name of some bitter idea about how feminism has destroyed everything. Be thankful we, in the U.S. anyway, live in relative peace and comfort domestically, so your theory isn't immediately testable. Men died for that peace we enjoy. Men will die again. I almost died on 9/11, and saw many men carrying women, consoling women, I did my share. You want to talk about what men are socialized for? Men are socialized to... ... get women, and you have control over how that scenario plays out on your home turf. Don't like how it's playing out for you? Change your behavior and/or expectations. I am also tired of men old enough to be my father thinking that I would want to be with them. Cool, reject them. No one is suggesting otherwise. They have a right to approach whomever they like though. Oh you are such a stud! A 23 year old wanted you! You’re so special! Yes yes we know..you’re so mature and worldly......Oh how you “shot” those “little” boys down...If she was 23 she must have been a prize! Because all 23 year old girls are automatically better just by sheer number! Do you even know how degrading that is to that 23 year old girl herself? Do you know how funny it is that *you* actually think her *age* says something about *you* and your "maturity" or how you "beat" out the young competition? Do know how funny it is that you consider yourself in competition with other 23 year old guys? It's funny because you dually think you are automatically better then these guys while you take great pleasure from beating them out..like it was a "challenage". Like you were really being out your peers. While you feel the same glee if you beat out another guy your age for a woman your age? I doubt it. It's funny to me becaues your an older guy and you were excited to beat out 23 year old guys for a 23 year old girl. I mean really? That's a big accomplishment? That's something to brag about? No comment. Awwww, that's so sweet..OMG may all women find such a wonderful man that banged lots of young woman then dated someone older..like throwing a starving dog a bone..what a swearheat your friend is..every girl should be so lucky.......... Good lord. No comment. There is more bullcrap in this thread then a cow pasture in a 90 degree day. Yep. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Question: Amongst LS'ers, who is or has family members who are/have been married 32 (using my parents as an example) or more years? Mine have been married 48 years. My dad's sisters have been married more than 50. It does seem to be unusual these days. Link to post Share on other sites
casanovadude81 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I enjoy a youthful look to a woman whether she be young or older. I don't limit myself with age. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Thanks Red Robin. I guess lately I have been feeling pretty unloveable because my love life has sucked lately and I really hate these guys telling me what I do or don't deserve because other women rejected them. They don't stop to consider that women might go through difficult things to and that not all of us are breaking hearts and being selfish. I also look at my mom who is a widow now and she is 55 years old. She deserves a guy around her age. Not some guy who really wants to bang younger women and just uses her to take up time with or basically think she has less worth then younger women. Hmm... There are a couple of single gents her age on this forum, I think. Maybe you could play matchmaker? both parties willing, of course. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Plenty of older women get married and have men interested in them everyday. Why get mad at a few people on the internet. They have the right to their preferences. I can get mad at women who would reject a good man over a few inches but that would be pointless so be glad these men have weeded themselves out of your dating pool. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I was going to say don't dump the Pepsi down the toilet, but then thought it might be good to use as a drain cleaner. Also works to clean battery terminals on your car. Try it sometime. It is fun to watch it fizz. Make sure to recycle the cans though. Drink more Coke and support my alma-mater! Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I just started recently on the dating sites. What I am finding the most frustrating is the guys on there who are my age (38) wont even have a look at me - they all want the 20yr olds. BTW I dont look my age in the least bit - I could pass for late 20's early 30's. On that note too - I get like 50yr old & 60yr old men messaging me!!! Really!! Why would I want to go out with someone who could be my father? Its just so frustrating - what goes through your guys minds? Do you really think you have a chance? I am in in no way looking for a sugar daddy - I just want to meet someone close to my age (I would entertain 6-7 years older or younger than me) I just wanted some insight as I am new to the online dating world after being recently divorced after 17yrs of marriage. Just keep plugging away. There are a zillion people out there in the market and none are perfect. To give you a little perspective from how I see things as the older guy, if other men are like me I don't see myself AT ALL really. I know I have age and weight negatives that sound bad on paper, but when I look in the mirror I don't see anything but myself and I feel not much different than myself at 32. I'm single but haven't turned to on-line dating to get set up because I have aspirations of succeeding as an entrepreneur and artist and that's a big strike against me that I am my age and am not already a success who can rest on his laurels. I, like everyone else, need affection and validation--I'd love to have the whole nine yards of sex and plenty of time to just see the world and live a happy time, but that's not what life has dealt me so I don't fish for relationships on dating sites. But if I did I'd have to admit that I'd like to have someone who is good-looking, in good health, and has a brain and good charater. I can see that many people of the 30 to my age group still have not reconciled with the fact that age claims them too and seem to think that there's just enless numbers of "next" fellas or gals are there so that it is no bog deal to reject someone very easily based on the criteria that can belisted on paper. But real happiness becomes much more important to people as they pass a certain level of maturity. I think more people do not reach that level than do. I see it reflected all the time in commentary here on LS. To me, looks become far secondary to other character elements. Looks are for good fantasy but if you've lived a long time and experienced a lot, you realize that depth and loyalty and patience and the acceptance of responsibility count way more than whther one tits sag or are still perky of if a guy has all his original teeth or a mouthful of replacements. I don't date IRL or seek dating on-line. I feel the truth about me on paper would not appeal to very many people. So I have all my eggs in the basket of succeeding at something that distinguishes me as a unique human being with character and insight you won't find anywhere else. Do I want to entertain myself with some 25 year old iconic female just because it would look good and make me look like a middle age man on the make? No. I much rather encounter someone of any age and race (with a vagina tyvm) who I admire for at least her depth of potential as a human being if not the depth she already demonstrates. So many people think they are immortal, will not age, don't even need health insurance--something which is on the deus at the US Supreme Court as I write as the Court decides if the "individual mandate" in health care reform called unfortunately "Obamacare" is or is not constitutional--but they aren't guaranteed not one day more in their lives. We are all mortal, age and will die. So it's a matter of privilege to have in your life for any amount of time, one person who connects with you, makes time for you and vice versa, and establishes that yes, you are trusted and accepted to share affection, physically, emotionally and intellectually. I look at it like the story of "The Tortoise and the Hare". Most folks are out their like the hare--running around with half-cocked notions of what happiness means. If they get their heart broken--or even if they are deep enough to have a heart that might be broken--time may reveal the truth to them that it's not a race to he next best-looking thing. It's a slow, steady struggle to be somebody, create something that you can pass on if you're not a child of fortune yourself, and earn the rspect and loyalty of someone else who value substance over form. I myself can overlook a lot. I'd of course love to experience total sexual indulgence without consequence but that is the province of fantasy because there is always consequence if you are a person of substance. If you are not, you are a hare and will probably never matter--just another organism on a big ball that doesn't care who comes and goes. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 No one "blamed" women for anything there, only a particular poster's expectation that men should somehow be limited in whom we approach just because she says so, despite the fact that women generally don't suffer the constant mindf-ck that is approaching women today. And FWIW, if women were more proactive, they could certainly go out and approach whomever they like, old, young, fat, skinny, stupid, drunk, doesn't matter to me. I'm not the one dictating who is right or wrong for someone to approach, left my "king o the world" hat at Burger King. Yes, you did blame women. You insinuated that if women only did “x,y,z” that would somehow be a game changer or solve the problem being discussed. You basically always think the answer is for women to be proactive and approach men. It’s something you regularly use as a response no matter the conversation. Be thankful we, in the U.S. anyway, live in relative peace and comfort domestically, so your theory isn't immediately testable. Men died for that peace we enjoy. Men will die again. I almost died on 9/11, and saw many men carrying women, consoling women, I did my share. Yes, men certainly DID die for peace. And they aren’t on the internet posting here about the Titanic. And yes, many men were heros on 9/11. And so weere women. ... get women, and you have control over how that scenario plays out on your home turf. Don't like how it's playing out for you? Change your behavior and/or expectations. Really? Do share how I have control over how “that scenario plays out on my home turf.” Cool, reject them. No one is suggesting otherwise. They have a right to approach whomever they like though. They really don’t. No one has a “right” to approach anyone. They certainly have the freedom to do that. But it is not a justifiable “right”. And I do reject them and I usually let them know how silly the where and why I was rejecting them. No comment. Not surprised. Of course you won’t comment. Because you know I am right. Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Hmm... There are a couple of single gents her age on this forum, I think. Maybe you could play matchmaker? both parties willing, of course. Yikes! Don't know about that. Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Plenty of older women get married and have men interested in them everyday. Why get mad at a few people on the internet. They have the right to their preferences. I can get mad at women who would reject a good man over a few inches but that would be pointless so be glad these men have weeded themselves out of your dating pool. Damn you Woggle for your logical post! Link to post Share on other sites
quietGuy13 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 HERE"S THE REAL ANSWER. All you guys just keep babbling about nothing. The real answer is this: OLDER GUYS GO FOR MUCH YOUNGER Girls because MUCH YOUNGER GIRLS ARE SEXY. That's all there is to it. I'd take any sexy 18 year old any time!! I got a couple some time ago . ordered them from some escort agency and we had a great time. actually she was 19. So hot and so beautiful. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Plenty of older women get married and have men interested in them everyday. Why get mad at a few people on the internet. They have the right to their preferences. I can get mad at women who would reject a good man over a few inches but that would be pointless so be glad these men have weeded themselves out of your dating pool. Inches where? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Inches where? Both. Also many of these men just want some fun and as messed up as this sounds when I was in my just wanting fun state of mind I went for the hottest women I can find. I think men like this should stick to sites dedicated to casual sex because they are out there. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Yikes! Don't know about that. oh, okay ... and to follow up from the earlier sentiments... ... if you don't quote them, noone else has to read 'their' junk either... Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts