Sex Without Emotion for Women - Is it possible?

[EricaH329]

Ok, how many men have you had casual sex with and how often? It is ok to take risks "sometimes"..Very smart..

 

I've had casual sex, i'd say, a few times. This was before I met the man that i'm in love with now. So probably over the course of a few years.

 

I guess I am more attracted to women who care deeply about who enters their bodies..

 

Matter of preference. Nothing wrong with that. But don't try to degrade myself because of my personal preferences.

 

Also, i'd like to point out that when I have sex with the man that I love, it is the most amazing, intimate experience I have ever gone through in my entire life. No doubt incredibly more satisfying than casual sex.

 

Having sex with a stranger once a year or every 6 months would be satisfying? Huh? You would not mind if he left right as the condom was hitting the floor? I doubt it.

 

Well the people I choose to have casual sex with are my friends. They aren't random strangers. So when I have had casual sex, we've hung out afterwards.

 

But if I were to have casual sex with someone and they decided to leave right afterwards, it wouldn't bother me. We both used eachother for the same exact reason. No point in being upset because he doesn't want to cuddle or hang out afterwards. That wasn't the point of what we were there to do.

[calizaggy]

I am calling complete BS..

 

This is how sex without emotions works for men..

 

Men can see a girl on the corner, ask her for sex, bang her, and completely forget about it within 10 minutes..

 

The above is "sex without emotions"

 

Even the easiest girls around want to go on a date, or spend time together, or want to be told something nice,spend the night together in most cases, etc. They would want to be attracted to the guy, etc.

 

Often times the above easy girls are confusing because they make "just sex" into more than it really is when together.. So men are confused as to how it was just sex when she was acting like it was more..

[SilkRose]

Ok, how many men have you had casual sex with and how often? It is ok to take risks "sometimes"..Very smart..

 

I guess I am more attracted to women who care deeply about who enters their bodies..

 

Having sex with a stranger once a year or every 6 months would be satisfying? Huh? You would not mind if he left right as the condom was hitting the floor? I doubt it.

 

Having sex AT ALL creates the 'risk' of pregancy or STDs, I am celibate at the moment and can be for long periods of time, I just don't want to be for the rest of my life. So I don't fit into your catergories for which women are 'good' or 'bad' based on sexual choices.

 

Also men become tired after sex...so jumping up with a condom on is implausible, unhygenic, undignified - its a mildly comical joke. I just think its sad that you hold double standards for men and women. Have a view, fine but why judge women? Especially women who are clear and honest. Also men in relationships don't necessarily provide sexual satisfaction, as always depends on the partner and if he knows how to listen...

[EricaH329]

Having established the possibility and propensity, how does it work practically, wrt to casual sex without emotion?

Do you have a stable of potentials?

Random encounters?

Does relationship status matter?

Only men who have no long-term potential?

I'm just curious, as I meet so few women like this and am also fascinated how a woman can so quickly decide, without knowing a man, which box he gets put into, casual sex without emotion-wise. I guess, never having seen women as a piece of ass, I just don't get it. Happy to learn

 

Personally, i've never had casual sex with a stranger or someone I just met. They were either ex boyfriends, or friends. I knew their relationship status, and I would never sleep with them if they did have a GF.

[calizaggy]

Having sex AT ALL creates the 'risk' of pregancy or STDs, I am celibate at the moment and can be for long periods of time, I just don't want to be for the rest of my life. So I don't fit into your catergories for which women are 'good' or 'bad' based on sexual choices.

 

Also men become tired after sex...so jumping up with a condom on is implausible, unhygenic, undignified - its a mildly comical joke. I just think its sad that you hold double standards for men and women. Have a view, fine but why judge women? Especially women who are clear and honest. Also men in relationships don't necessarily provide sexual satisfaction, as always depends on the partner and if he knows how to listen...

 

Sorry, there are double standards..

 

One small example would be crying... Acceptable for women over many small things, not acceptable for men..I doubt many women would be attracted to guys who cried almost daily over any small thing.

 

I am pointing out that sex is vastly different for men and women.. That is how we are made.. Even the girl who says she has casual sex without emotions points out the sex she had was with people she was already emotionally connected to, her friends.

[EricaH329]

I am calling complete BS..

 

This is how sex without emotions works for men..

 

Men can see a girl on the corner, ask her for sex, bang her, and completely forget about it within 10 minutes..

 

The above is "sex without emotions"

 

Even the easiest girls around want to go on a date, or spend time together, or want to be told something nice,spend the night together in most cases, etc. They would want to be attracted to the guy, etc.

 

Often times the above easy girls are confusing because they make "just sex" into more than it really is when together.. So men are confused as to how it was just sex when she was acting like it was more..

 

There is a simple solution to this. You have never experienced a female that's able to have sex without emotions.

 

Simple as that.

 

If you have, the above statement would be something you have experienced to be incorrect.

[SilkRose]

Personally, i've never had casual sex with a stranger or someone I just met. They were either ex boyfriends, or friends. I knew their relationship status, and I would never sleep with them if they did have a GF.

 

Be careful with having casual sex with someone you just met. They could be dangerous.

 

And it's alright if you aren't able to have casual sex. Some women can't. I wasn't able to until my sexual drive shot through the roof. But since casual sex is based on sexual needs, as opposed to emotional needs, if you want it bad enough then your emotions don't tend to get in the way.

 

I wouldn't have sex with someone I just met, you're right that would be dangerous. I was thinking more along the lines of friends, not ex boyfriends but friends or work collegues. Thanks for your comments, very non-judgemental and straight to the point. It is totally my choice, if I wanted to stay celibate forever I could, whatever I want to do I can, I jsut have to be wise. Its great that you've formed a relationship, especially one where you can both be honest with eachother.

[kiss_andmakeup]

I've had very few true ONS, in fact, only one. Beyond that, the closest thing I had to ONS were a few flings...where I met a guy, we started having sex relatively soon, and continued to date/have sex for anywhere from a couple weeks to a month.

 

With these I'd say I developed a small crush initially before losing interest rather quickly, which made it a fling. So you could say I was emotionally detached, just not completely.

 

Oh, and in all cases - flings and my lone ONS - the guy got emotionally attached and wanted to make it a relationship whereas I didn't...just sayin'...

 

Now I've been with my boyfriend for a while and I can't imagine sleeping with anyone but him. :]

[marlena]

Carhill,

 

Here's how it works... You are older and wiser and know (finally) that fairy tales seldom have a "lived happily ever after" finale.

 

You decide that you will live life to the hilt and enjoy the moment for, when all is said and done, who can know if there will be a next moment? Life is but a short a stroll in this plane of dimension.

 

And so, you enforce carpe diem and know that in the face of your mortality, that's all matters.

 

You meet someone and the chemistry is overpowering ... you go for it... life's meaning is captured in nanosecond... which is more than a lot of people can attest to.

 

It's a philosophy when done in full awareness.. and a catastrophe when done in ignorance.

[EricaH329]

Sorry, there are double standards..

 

One small example would be crying... Acceptable for women over many small things, not acceptable for men..I doubt many women would be attracted to guys who cried almost daily over any small thing.

 

And many women wouldn't be attracted to other women who cry daily over any small thing. I know that I don't think it's cute when a female cries all the time.

 

I am pointing out that sex is vastly different for men and women.. That is how we are made.. Even the girl who says she has casual sex without emotions points out the sex she had was with people she was already emotionally connected to, her friends.

 

Ok, we are obviously talking about two completely different things. Casual sex, to me, is sex without romantic emotions. Something that doesn't make you want to cuddle afterwards, or begin dating the other person.

 

Feelings of friendship do not allow the previously mentioned issues to arise. Therefore, casual sex.

 

I do not care if these guys go out and have sex with other women, I do not care if they decide to get into a serious relationship, and I most certainly do not care if they don't call me afterwards.

[calizaggy]

Erica, sorry, you can't have sex like men do, as we are vastly different..

 

You even admitted the casual sex you had was with friends..People you already have an emotional connection to.

 

Since men and women are VASTLY different, double standards exist.

 

Sex without emotions means NO EMOTIONS, before, during, or after.. Just screwing for a release.. I think women can do this, but they are called hookers.

[marlena]

Just want to add that having random sex is, in some befitting way, as random as life itself..

 

There is a a certain balance in it, if you think about it.

[SilkRose]

Sorry, there are double standards..

 

One small example would be crying... Acceptable for women over many small things, not acceptable for men..I doubt many women would be attracted to guys who cried almost daily over any small thing.

 

I am pointing out that sex is vastly different for men and women.. That is how we are made.. Even the girl who says she has casual sex without emotions points out the sex she had was with people she was already emotionally connected to, her friends.

 

The fact that double standards exist doesn't make them correct or right. And it doesn't mean that they actually relate to how people actually live today.

 

Also sleeping with friends is simply safer, they know you, you know them and you may be able to still maintain that friendship afterwards. This may be possible, especially as I plan to stay single and guys my age are constantly breaking up with their girlfriends or just choose to be single, so there points where they are single...it's a possibility.

[calizaggy]

Oh, and in all cases - flings and my lone ONS - the guy got emotionally attached and wanted to make it a relationship whereas I didn't...just sayin'...

 

 

I doubt they really knew you enough to want a relationship..

 

What they wanted was to keep screwing. Casual sex is not always easy for men to find without paying for it.

[EricaH329]

I wouldn't have sex with someone I just met, you're right that would be dangerous. I was thinking more along the lines of friends, not ex boyfriends but friends or work collegues. Thanks for your comments, very non-judgemental and straight to the point. It is totally my choice, if I wanted to stay celibate forever I could, whatever I want to do I can, I jsut have to be wise. Its great that you've formed a relationship, especially one where you can both be honest with eachother.

 

Thank you!!!

 

I guess what it comes down to is you trying it out for yourself! That's really the only way you'll be able to find out if you can do it or not. If so, great! If not, that's ok too! Do whatever makes you happy!

[kiss_andmakeup]

Erica, sorry, you can't have sex like men do, as we are vastly different..

 

You even admitted the casual sex you had was with friends..People you already have an emotional connection to.

 

Since men and women are VASTLY different, double standards exist.

 

Sex without emotions means NO EMOTIONS, before, during, or after.. Just screwing for a release.. I think women can do this, but they are called hookers.

 

You're hilarious...fiercly defending your man-exclusive right to emotionless sex...

 

It might be less common for a woman but it's definitely possible. After my one ONS I had absolutely no interest in the guy and certainly no emotional attachment...but I also didn't feel down on myself or "dirty"; I had just gotten out of a relationship and was single for the first time in a while and was giving myself a "free pass" so to speak to have fun.

[kiss_andmakeup]

I doubt they really knew you enough to want a relationship..

 

What they wanted was to keep screwing. Casual sex is not always easy for men to find without paying for it.

 

I'm always pleasantly surprised by how people on LS seem to know more about other posters' lives than the posters themselves...

 

One guy was moving to Colorado and wanted me to move with him after dating for a month. Another guy asked me to be exclusive and said he was "falling for me" when all along I had viewed our relationship as casual. These were the turning points in the relationships that caused me to break them off, not last-minute-efforts on the part of the guy to keep me around. Regardless of what they wanted, though, my point was that they were a lot more attached than I was.

[SilkRose]

Ok, we are obviously talking about two completely different things. Casual sex, to me, is sex without romantic emotions. Something that doesn't make you want to cuddle afterwards, or begin dating the other person.

 

Feelings of friendship do not allow the previously mentioned issues to arise. Therefore, casual sex.

 

I do not care if these guys go out and have sex with other women, I do not care if they decide to get into a serious relationship, and I most certainly do not care if they don't call me afterwards.

 

Erica, sorry, you can't have sex like men do, as we are vastly different..

 

You even admitted the casual sex you had was with friends..People you already have an emotional connection to.

 

Since men and women are VASTLY different, double standards exist.

 

Sex without emotions means NO EMOTIONS, before, during, or after.. Just screwing for a release.. I think women can do this, but they are called hookers.

 

By sex without emotions I mean romantic emotions. Also there are levels of friendships ranging from close life-long friends to friends who I see from time to time, through work or studies or a common interest so we are friends be we aren't on the phone talking for hours every week.

 

There are plenty of men who have casual sex with their friends....that's how some men make friends. lol. Ok seriously that why some men have female friends, because they are hoping to have sex with them. Recently chatted to a classmate about this very issue...he explained this and I've noticed that some men have female friends and he has slept with every single one. He wants to have them there as a possibility. That's not to say that they aren't doing the same thing...

 

Also This thread isn't about 'hookers' they can speak for themselves.

[calizaggy]

Just trying to figure this out..

 

Apparently casual sex for women with no emotions is satisfying, yet the women who claim to do this admit they have done it very very sparingly, or with friends..Or once in their entire lives after a break up.

 

Sounds more like being lonely than really enjoying emotionless casual sex.

[SilkRose]

Thank you!!!

 

I guess what it comes down to is you trying it out for yourself! That's really the only way you'll be able to find out if you can do it or not. If so, great! If not, that's ok too! Do whatever makes you happy!

 

Thanks.

[calizaggy]

If men were similar to women, would this even be a question?

[marlena]

Sounds more like being lonely than really enjoying emotionless casual sex.

 

Good try but what a crock of nonsense!! You can be lonely and still enjoy the sex..."bona fide" couples do it all the time!!

 

You need to stop buying into cheap, romantic scenarios...

 

How old are you?

[kiss_andmakeup]

Who says you can't be lonely and enjoy casual sex?

[SilkRose]

I've had very few true ONS, in fact, only one. Beyond that, the closest thing I had to ONS were a few flings...where I met a guy, we started having sex relatively soon, and continued to date/have sex for anywhere from a couple weeks to a month.

 

With these I'd say I developed a small crush initially before losing interest rather quickly, which made it a fling. So you could say I was emotionally detached, just not completely.

 

Oh, and in all cases - flings and my lone ONS - the guy got emotionally attached and wanted to make it a relationship whereas I didn't...just sayin'...

 

Now I've been with my boyfriend for a while and I can't imagine sleeping with anyone but him. :]

 

The one time I tried FWB with a friend I had known for years, he got emotionally attached, and would've proposed. This guy was a player and though that he could handle it but he ended up in love.

 

Erica, sorry, you can't have sex like men do, as we are vastly different..

 

You even admitted the casual sex you had was with friends..People you already have an emotional connection to.

 

Since men and women are VASTLY different, double standards exist.

 

Sex without emotions means NO EMOTIONS, before, during, or after.. Just screwing for a release.. I think women can do this, but they are called hookers.

 

Double standards exist due to sexism. Sex for a release is didn't to sex with is without romantic feeling but sexually satisfying and pleasurable. There is a different between 'release' and 'pleasure', pleasure incorporates both. That is worth having once every 6 months.

 

QUOTE=kiss_andmakeup;2644506]You're hilarious...fiercly defending your man-exclusive right to emotionless sex...

 

It might be less common for a woman but it's definitely possible. After my one ONS I had absolutely no interest in the guy and certainly no emotional attachment...but I also didn't feel down on myself or "dirty"; I had just gotten out of a relationship and was single for the first time in a while and was giving myself a "free pass" so to speak to have fun.

 

You didn't do something wrong, which is what is being implied, you wanted to, he wanted to as long as you used condoms, its all good.

 

I doubt they really knew you enough to want a relationship..

 

What they wanted was to keep screwing. Casual sex is not always easy for men to find without paying for it.

 

Also men who pay for sex aren't the topic of this thread either. lol. Sex isn't bad and some men to get casual sex that's for a release or for pleasure too without paying or anything like that, they have skills or a job that's appealing to women and the desire for it.

 

 

I'm always pleasantly surprised by how people on LS seem to know more about other posters' lives than the posters themselves...

 

 

So true!

 

Just trying to figure this out..

 

Apparently casual sex for women with no emotions is satisfying, yet the women who claim to do this admit they have done it very very sparingly, or with friends..Or once in their entire lives after a break up.

 

Sounds more like being lonely than really enjoying emotionless casual sex.

 

Also sex is physically 'involved' I don't need to do it all the time if its with different people/friends. But if its with a boyfriend then that's different.

[calizaggy]

Who says you can't be lonely and enjoy casual sex?

 

 

Once again, what is casual sex? Sex with a friend? FWB you are leading on?

 

It seems as a last resort, very lonely women will have casual sex more or less to cure their loneliness OR RECENT PAIN, rather than because they really love casual sex and feel wonderful and proud afterwards.

 

Check out dating sites, and see what the women look like who are seeking casual sex..Usually fat, old, ugly.. You won't find women with tons of options (young, beautiful, mentally stable) seeking casual sex.