Chump64 Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 I find it pathetic that you are hanging around an internet board looking for boning advice, 1976. Get off the pot. Go call her and make a screw date. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 I find it pathetic you are on here as well, shouldn't you be spending time with your husband? Link to post Share on other sites
Blind Illusion Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 I have no problem banging her, thats not what my question was. My question was why was I getting mixed signals. I would guess she has mixed feelings herself. Perhaps she is attracted to you but feels like she shouldn't be, hence the mixed signals. Time will probably tell. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 Thats the best response I have heard so far. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim'sAngel Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 and timsangel, its not always sex that drives a man away, sorry to break it to you women. First off, just like you, we dont' want out other to be out of shape. A woman who spends to much money, or is lazy around the house. I keep myself in shape, help clean the house, etc, and I expect my wife to do her fair share of work. Sometimes, even a guy loses "closeness" with his wife. One can fall out of love, just like a woman. So contrary to women's popular belief, men don't always cheat on their wives because the sex is bad. AH, apologies 19, I missed the part where u were legally separated. Damn, I hate reading this stuff because I'm so scared it will happen to me one day. I think I found out my SO was cheating, I wouldn't want to live anymore. I've become so paranoid since I've joined LS. Even my SO has noticed it. But i guess it can be helpful, at least I'll know what to look for Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 The wrong path is letting her cheat on her husband with you. That is the wrong path. I'm sorry you don't see it that way. Imagine those feelings you once had for your wife. Imagine her with another man. Imagine that hurt and complete devastation, loss of love and trust for her when you would find out she had sex with another man... Now, apply that to YOUR situation! I don't understand why you can't see that she is TORN between being with you and cheating on her husband. She is confused and not sure what to do. Be a gentleman and step away. Tell her when her marriage ends, to call you then. And in the meantime, try finding a single woman you can hook up with. You just don't see the s*** that will be happening if you allow this to happen. Don't let her cheat on her husband! Just remember too, when he finds out, if two DO end up having an affair (sooner or later, he will) keep in mind he will probably want to come kick your ass. I just want to know what direction that is so I am not going down the wrong path. Do you mean: You won't waste your time trying to get into her pants? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 and timsangel, its not always sex that drives a man away, sorry to break it to you women. First off, just like you, we dont' want out other to be out of shape. A woman who spends to much money, or is lazy around the house. I keep myself in shape, help clean the house, etc, and I expect my wife to do her fair share of work. Sometimes, even a guy loses "closeness" with his wife. One can fall out of love, just like a woman. So contrary to women's popular belief, men don't always cheat on their wives because the sex is bad. I agree. But a wise man and an honourable man (and a woman too) would try their best to fix their marriage, give it all they got BEFORE throwing in the towel and walking away. Being unhappy in the marriage, and NOT trying to fix things to make it better is a cop-out. So many people allow s*** like this END their marriage because they're TOO scared of actually working hard to fix things. To talk, to fight and sort stuff out. That is what pushes people to have affairs...Fear of having to change and fix real issues - SO yeah, they take the easy way out and make the choice to cheat. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 LOL No. When she first said she wanted to be just friends, I was fine with that, and kept talking to her, more in a friendly way than the lover way. After a week or so, she invited me out to hang out. If I didn't want "to waste my time", when she first told me no, I would have bolted. Link to post Share on other sites
Chump64 Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 Tim's Angel, being paranoid is not good. It's good to know what signs to look for. But don't live in fear. And anyway, my husband displayed NONE of those typical signs. He'd still be scrogging away if I hadn't chanced upon a couple of suspicious emails. That said, no marriage is affair-proof, either. And the "I'm not being satisfied sexually" line is BS. Usually that is a symptom of a man who is too emotionally immature and shallow to talk to his wife about his needs. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 LOL No. When she first said she wanted to be just friends, I was fine with that, and kept talking to her, more in a friendly way than the lover way. After a week or so, she invited me out to hang out. If I didn't want "to waste my time", when she first told me no, I would have bolted. Can I ask you. Is it sex you want to have with her or do you actually have 'real' feelings for her. I just ask this because men can separate love and sex, whereas most woman cannot do that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 Hey, I never cheated on my wife when I was married for 10 years. give me some credit. If she wants to cheat on her husband, thats her choice. If it is not with me, then its with some other guy. I live by the believe, "if you have the chance to do something that will make you happy, take it, because you never know if or when you will get the chance again" as for him kicking my ass, thats a chance I am willing to take. Link to post Share on other sites
Chump64 Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 That is what pushes people to have affairs...Fear of having to change and fix real issues - SO yeah, they take the easy way out and make the choice to cheat. I agree with you, WWIU. But wouldn't it be easier to talk and fight with your spouse than to strike up a whole new relationship and have to hide it / sneak around / etc? That's what I don't get. My husband's former OW was also kind of high maintenance. In one email I read, she was jealous b/c she saw him sitting in a meeting between his boss and one other female co-worker. Freak. In another, she was mad b/c she was in a meeting on his floor. She purposely sat by the window so he would walk by and look at her to see what she was wearing, but he failed to do so. FREAK. I am rambling, but my point is that cheaters (at least those who truly don't want a divorce) are too stupid to realize it would be easier to fix an exisiting relationship than to create a whole new one, with its own set of problems, demands and complications. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 Can I ask you. Is it sex you want to have with her or do you actually have 'real' feelings for her. I just ask this because men can separate love and sex, whereas most woman cannot do that. It is a little of both I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim'sAngel Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 I think I've officially given up on the human race ... Link to post Share on other sites
Chump64 Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 If she wants to cheat on her husband, thats her choice. If it is not with me, then its with some other guy. That doesn't absolve you from responsibility for f*cking a married woman, something I suspect you know is immoral and wrong. Again, what are you waiting for? CALL HER UP. Don't forget the condoms. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 alot of you, chump, for example, are taking your experiance and implying it to everyone that comes on the boards. I talked to my wife about our sex problems, we worked them out, things got better in that catagory. But it was the other areas, after years of fighting about it, that finally done us in. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 If she wants to cheat on her husband, thats her choice. If it is not with me, then its with some other guy. That doesn't absolve you from responsibility for f*cking a married woman, something I suspect you know is immoral and wrong. Again, what are you waiting for? CALL HER UP. Don't forget the condoms. sorry, we have a no call rule in effect. Condoms, check. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 Hey, I never cheated on my wife when I was married for 10 years. give me some credit. If she wants to cheat on her husband, thats her choice. If it is not with me, then its with some other guy. I live by the believe, "if you have the chance to do something that will make you happy, take it, because you never know if or when you will get the chance again" as for him kicking my ass, thats a chance I am willing to take. I didn't say you did - I am asking you to look at this situation from a different angle so you can imagine what PAIN will be inflicted on this man if you take HIS wife to bed and have sex with her, that's all. Fact is, she doesn't WANT to cheat on her husband, but if she did, chances are it will be with you. Wanna know why??? Cuz she has emotional and sexual feelings for you. She is more than likely torn between making the biggest mistake of her life (cheating) and staying home to fix her marriage, stay with her husband. The fact she confides in you, YOU have alot of power over her - SO respect her, respect her husband, respect their marriage. SHE IS NOT GOING TO GO FIND ANOTHER MAN TO CHEAT WITH. But, believe what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Chump64 Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 1976, I'm talking in general terms and based on the buttload of stuff I have read. I'm not talking about you and your (soon to be) ex, specifically. You can do whatever you want, if you aren't married or will soon be divorced. But you should be smart enough to stay away from married women. I don't think you are, though. Are you looking for someone to tell you how to proceed? Then why don't you take the advice I've given? And why are you online on a Saturday night when you could be out boffing her in a parking garage? Why are you interested in someone with so much baggage? Is she your only possible date? Do you have some reason to believe that no other woman will be interested in you? Does this woman have kids? Link to post Share on other sites
Chump64 Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 Why do you want a girlfriend who you can't call? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 And why are you online on a Saturday night when you could be out boffing her in a parking garage? Because she obviously is smart and is at home with her husband. If there are children in this equation and you're still wanting her, I'm done with this thead completely. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 I will be honest and say I dont' care about his feelings, etc. Here he has this beautiful woman at his side, who after 15 years of marriage ignores her, smacks her around, and I am supposed to give a sh*t about him? Please. I have seen the bruises. call me immoral, whatever. I honestly don't care about him in the least bit. maybe if he finds out she is interested in someone else, he will treat her better and she will stay with him and things will work out. maybe she will leave him, As long as she is happy in the end, I don't care. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim'sAngel Posted May 28, 2006 Share Posted May 28, 2006 You know 19, I don't have experience in this area, but I do know alot about women because... well.. I am one. Some women, myself included, can and have been able to separate sex from emotions, but unfortunately, most cannot. You are opening a big ole fat can of worms my friend. If you want a f*** buddy, then more power to you. You were married for 10 years and now its time to move on. I would suggest finding someone who isn't married or attached. What may be just friendly sex to you might be emotions and love to her. Its a huge risk and you might find yourself ina huge love triangle a few months down the road that you had no intention of involving yourself in. JMO BTW, her having mixed signals is a sign she really likes you. If she just wanted to jump your bones for a good ole night of sparkin, she would have already Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 I am at home on a saturday because I have my kids this weekend. Why are you on here on a saturday night? she have kids? nope. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1976 Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 continue to post you all, I'll catch up inthe morning, later! Link to post Share on other sites
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