Anela Posted March 26, 2015 Share Posted March 26, 2015 I don't know anyone who has settled. If they tried to (my mother tried, once), the incompatibilities came through soon enough. He was an older man, the type that thought he would control his wife and her children - he told a friend all sorts of things that he hadn't said to Mum, and she broke off the engagement. Link to post Share on other sites
Anela Posted March 26, 2015 Share Posted March 26, 2015 I don't think that this starts to happen until women are 30+. It's when they are tired of being used by the players and hot guys. Plenty of hot guys, are also decent guys. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Vercetti Posted March 26, 2015 Share Posted March 26, 2015 If someone is in any relationship for any reason beyond absolute love, pure chemistry, and just desire to simply be with another regardless...they have settled. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki Sahagin Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 I don't know anyone who has admitted to settling but I'm sure that many do. Link to post Share on other sites
Vercetti Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Well, I know a few that did. Friends getting married, so they get married just cause. Reach a XX age and feel obligated, so just do. Used to date art musician types, yet go for a plumber. Used to date hot guys, so think the unattractive one won't give them drama. Sick of corporate grind, so hook up with a meal ticket troll. Don't think can do better so get married for no good reason. It's not rare at all from my experience. All of them got divorced after a few years. Funny enough the guys they settled for dropped the papers...so much for security by compromising yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
apeman101 Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Love - the most overrated four letter word in history. Women want to mate with the highest desirable male & desire commitment from him and men want to mate with many beautiful women. Marriage is just an illusion to divorce rape in future. Link to post Share on other sites
Emerald_11 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 I know a guy who is getting married in a few months to a girl who he says is not attractive. He says she is 45 pounds overweight and not pretty. I can see his point when I look at her but feel bad for her that that is how he talks about her behind her back- I wont tell her he said this stuff though because I am not that close of friends with her... They are a bit of an odd couple.... I asked him why they are getting married then & he said because he doesn't think she will ever cheat on him like what has happened to him before. He said she is a "safe" option to marry. Also he says he has fallen in love with the girls young daughter and he wants to be her dad. Its weird because it seems like he loves her daughter & just deals with his fiancé. I wonder how long it will last. Link to post Share on other sites
LifeWasted Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 I was chested on twice. By my ex wife and my ex girlfriend. Both got together with me even though they weren't attracted to me physically. Can't blame them but man I wish they would have just passed me up rathe r than messed with my life. I don't understand women who do this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lion Heart Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 (edited) True no one can know whats on a woman's mind but your actions speak louder than your thoughts. Roughly 60% of divorced are initiated by women .That speaks louder than anything. Did it NOT cross your mind just maybe that: A) H wanted a slave, to live and work for him OS whilst he played unpaid sports all over Europe? (my M no. 1) B) WH cheated on me and baby DD? (my exWH, M no. 2) C) WH cheated on me and THREE chn? My present M. OR EVEN JUST MAYBE: D) W was beaten regularly? About 93% of DV cases were H beating W last time I looked at those stats here E) the "horrible" Unthinking W gave birth to twins or more babies in a multiple birth (no enhancers here) 78% of M end after this. Majority of being H can't cope! Leaves. D. Glory be a H that can't cope wtf. Oh and btw my twins had a syndrome diagnosed in utero & had a less than 11% survival rate STATISTIC. Of those that survive more than half are severely disabled. Stats dictated I terminate them. F*** the stats my.boys are school leaders this year and score above the ceiling or in the top 5% of our state in statewide academic tests. Wake up whatever your name is. Everyone continues to advise that you can can your stats WHILST we are addressing an INDIVIDUAL in an INDIVIDUAL situation here on LS. My teenage DD also pointed out YEARS ago (just in case this HASN'T crossed your mind) that soon after the invention of statistics, ALMOST IMMEDIATELY AFTER IN FACT, people have been manipulating them for THEIR OWN PURPOSES. Often times statistics are not collected in their entirety. They can't, and why??? OH because many many many people Lie, Cheat and Manipulate them for WHAT EVER REASON they choose. Develop some compassion, develop some empathy, if stats help you - good! Not everyone has as much blind faith in stats as you and thank G** for that. Lion Heart. NB: for your further stat collection I didn't initiate any of my Ds. H no. 1 parents did by proxy and "surprised" him H no. 2 Fiancee paid for our D. Lol H no. 3 probably will be same as 2. Your stats are skewed already. :-) Edited March 28, 2015 by Lion Heart 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lion Heart Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 I never have and never would just "settle". Lion Heart. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 Plenty of hot guys, are also decent guys. A fact that is often overlooked in the bitter frenzy of alpha/beta, gold diggers, bad boys and settling... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
losangelena Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 A guy I used to date told me his ex-wife divorced him because she admitted that she'd never been attracted to him. Why she ever married him, I'll never know. Lord knows it wasn't because of his money, or large penis. Link to post Share on other sites
Mondmellonw Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I have known men that do the same. Or at least, they enter into relationships with girls they don't like. Link to post Share on other sites
AD1980 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 This is what I'm afraid of..I'm 34 and never been with a women so if I do get one I'm guessing it's because her biological clocks ticking snd she's not gonna be attracted to me Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I don't think that this starts to happen until women are 30+. It's when they are tired of being used by the players and hot guys. Bingo. Doesn't apply to all women, but I'm sure a lot do it. As I've said many times before, it's the absolute worst position for a guy to be in to be the guy that's settled for. But just don't be a sucker & fall for the trap. You should be able to see the signs of whether the woman you're with really cares about you or is just with you for security or the safe bet to them. Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 A guy I used to date told me his ex-wife divorced him because she admitted that she'd never been attracted to him. Why she ever married him, I'll never know. Lord knows it wasn't because of his money, or large penis. Seems he's either lying, or she was the type that just didn't want to be alone. Wouldn't surprise me if she cheated on him though. Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 This is what I'm afraid of..I'm 34 and never been with a women so if I do get one I'm guessing it's because her biological clocks ticking snd she's not gonna be attracted to me As I said, you should be able to tell if a woman genuinely likes you. If you have any doubts that you're the settle guy do not get married to them. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I was chested on twice. By my ex wife and my ex girlfriend. Both got together with me even though they weren't attracted to me physically. Can't blame them but man I wish they would have just passed me up rathe r than messed with my life. I don't understand women who do this. My ex did this as well, though he never cheated (other than cheating me out of a true marriage). It's a very hurtful deception. Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Ok, if some of you guys say so. I never even had sex with a man I did not have passion/attraction for, much less marry. I suppose it happens for security with some. I've never witnessed it myself with any of my friends. Any man I have sex with can bet the farm I want him, sincerely. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Ok, if some of you guys say so. I never even had sex with a man I did not have passion/attraction for, much less marry. I suppose it happens for security with some. I've never witnessed it myself with any of my friends. Any man I have sex with can bet the farm I want him, sincerely. It definitely happens. It's called desperation. Women who want kids & are in their mid-late 30s need to find a guy in a short amount of time. So they than settle for someone. Than there's women that are gold diggers too. But if a man gets played like that & becomes the settle guy than it's their own fault for not seeing it, but a lot of guys do fear it happening. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
StanMusial Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 It happens. I have no idea how frequently. This engaged lady at my gym told me and my buddy that she would ditch her fiance in a heartbeat "if Prince Charming came along". What the hell, man. Keep that shlt to yourself. She was no spring chicken either. Loveshack is a curious place. These threads pop up constantly about settling and "attraction". You have to ask yourself what kind of life you want to lead. I honestly don't understand the fixation on physical appearance. There are a ton of cute girls out there, not all of them could get or even want a GQ model. Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 It happens. I have no idea how frequently. This engaged lady at my gym told me and my buddy that she would ditch her fiance in a heartbeat "if Prince Charming came along". What the hell, man. Keep that shlt to yourself. She was no spring chicken either. Loveshack is a curious place. These threads pop up constantly about settling and "attraction". You have to ask yourself what kind of life you want to lead. I honestly don't understand the fixation on physical appearance. There are a ton of cute girls out there, not all of them could get or even want a GQ model. That's why I haven't posted on here much lately. It's the same threads over & over. And I'm tired of reading of all the depressing & ridiculous stories of people's relationships all the time. It's way too negative for the mind to do so. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
blackcat777 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 I think dating someone for a significant period of time before marriage lets people determine if they are compatible beyond the chemistry... That way, if it turns out you really can't relate to the other person, you're not settling for someone who left you with an emotional void. Just another slant. Settling doesn't always imply lesser chemistry; it can be lesser compatibility, too. When I did OLD, all the guys I met with were respectable, good-looking, had jobs. But they didn't make me laugh... Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 It happens. I have no idea how frequently. This engaged lady at my gym told me and my buddy that she would ditch her fiance in a heartbeat "if Prince Charming came along". What the hell, man. Keep that shlt to yourself. She was no spring chicken either. I guess she is well aware of her position in the pecking order, and so her comment is a moot point and said merely in jest. Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 I guess she is well aware of her position in the pecking order, and so her comment is a moot point and said merely in jest. Case in point. What the heck is the above supposed to mean???? Link to post Share on other sites
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