Author ap10 Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 OP, you need to learn to stop mind-reading and assuming things. Also, if you want to reconcile go for it now. What the heck is this thing about it being too fresh? The longer you wait the more people move on. -_- Shes going away tomorrow to a festival for 4 days. Shall i drop her a line and ask her to meet after shes back? Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Shes going away tomorrow to a festival for 4 days. Shall i drop her a line and ask her to meet after shes back? Sigh that would be the same thing as when you told her you had to talk and waited 7 days to have the actual conversation about being exclusive. Just call her. Link to post Share on other sites
ThorntonMelon Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Only thing I'd say here is when it's this hard...it's probably a good sign something is wrong. I wouldn't be as harsh to OP as others - seems to me this girl is full blown wishy washy and not a good LTR candidate. I think she's a good "have fun" type but as soon as it gets too close she'll kill you emotionally. Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Only thing I'd say here is when it's this hard...it's probably a good sign something is wrong. I wouldn't be as harsh to OP as others - seems to me this girl is full blown wishy washy and not a good LTR candidate. I think she's a good "have fun" type but as soon as it gets too close she'll kill you emotionally. I think they're both wishy washy and have game-playing tendencies that will affect every relationship they get into. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 Sigh that would be the same thing as when you told her you had to talk and waited 7 days to have the actual conversation about being exclusive. Just call her. Ah thats true. Not sure what to do Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 I think they're both wishy washy and have game-playing tendencies that will affect every relationship they get into. Regardless of the games, my intentions were good, hers were not. She avoided me, whereas i played hard to get, but made the effort whenever i was with her. She kept me sweet when not face to face, created excuses for not being able to meet due to her busy schedule, went excluisve and then when she met me she was all over me (her games were weird), but i gave her the benefit of the doubs because of her current struggles. Previously she was in 6 year relationship, 1 year single then a 1.5 year relationship then 3 months single and then i met her. Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 You are assuming things about her intentions that may or may not be real. Your behavior probably looks the same from her perspective regardless of your intentions. When you have a strong enough sense of self you would not want to play games because they are there to protect egos or get sex but doesn't work for finding good long term partners. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ThorntonMelon Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Regardless of the games, my intentions were good, hers were not. She avoided me, whereas i played hard to get, but made the effort whenever i was with her. She kept me sweet when not face to face, created excuses for not being able to meet due to her busy schedule, went excluisve and then when she met me she was all over me (her games were weird), but i gave her the benefit of the doubs because of her current struggles. Previously she was in 6 year relationship, 1 year single then a 1.5 year relationship then 3 months single and then i met her. Exactly. So why are you calling her? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 Exactly. So why are you calling her? Im not calling her. i want to make the right decision, but like her very much. Not sure if you had the chance to read the full post, but she was so happy to go exclusive, but declared to me that she needed to find herself and lover herself, before she could give herself to me fully. I guess there are things that i dont know that caused her to do this. i know my previous actions didnt help, but i was being very extra nice to show her how much i care. Not smothering her, but being caring. When someone says my heart wants you but my mind is saying no, is this rubbish or is it true and what does it mean for getting back together? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 22, 2014 Author Share Posted July 22, 2014 So Monday we broke up Shes text yesterday 'i hope you're brother in law is ok' (she knew he was in hospital) i texted back saying 'hes recovering, thanks' Today Photo up on facebook of me being out after work at a place she knows. She likes the photo and writes a comment 'good boy!'. What is she playing at? we said our goodbyes on the phone on sunday night and i told her we probably wont be seeing each other so all the best in life. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 It does not matter why she does this or that. Tell her you acted impulsively and you want her back. It will be a yes or a no. End of story. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Only you can decide whether your ego is more important or a potential relationship with her. Stop trying to read her mind. We cannot do it either. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 It does not matter why she does this or that. Tell her you acted impulsively and you want her back. It will be a yes or a no. End of story. She have now emailed me this morning: 'I miss you xx' Link to post Share on other sites
martaldn Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 She have now emailed me this morning: 'I miss you xx' come on!!! I am still looking for an happy ending here! call her!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 come on!!! I am still looking for an happy ending here! call her!! I would love to see a happy ending too. BUT why would she do this? Why should i jump at her teling me she misses me? I know she said her heart wants me but her mind says dont....then why this? Link to post Share on other sites
martaldn Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I would love to see a happy ending too. BUT why would she do this? Why should i jump at her teling me she misses me? I know she said her heart wants me but her mind says dont....then why this? why you dont stop analyzing her actions and words and try to save this relationship before it is too late? she said she misses you - you think breaking up was a mistake so please just do something about!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 why you dont stop analyzing her actions and words and try to save this relationship before it is too late? she said she misses you - you think breaking up was a mistake so please just do something about!! Ok thanks, but i didnt break up with her, she broke up with me? I will message her, but dont know what to say exactly. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Ok thanks, but i didnt break up with her, she broke up with me? I will message her, but dont know what to say exactly. ap10 you are unbelievable! Tell her you miss her too!! you want her back and together you can work things through. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 ap10 you are unbelievable! Tell her you miss her too!! you want her back and together you can work things through. ok i understand, but how can she be so hot and cold for 2 weeks and then breakup and then do this? Why should i believe she means it? Seriously people. I mean i like her alot, but having been so nice to her in the last 3 weeks and for her break up with me with whatever problems she has. Do you think it is right for me to just simply say 'yes i miss you too, lets work it out'? I know people are saying dont analyse it, but i have to be careful because her mind is clearly not all there. BUT i like her Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 ap10 you are unbelievable! Tell her you miss her too!! you want her back and together you can work things through. I am going to reply. 'Whats this about??' She needs to explain herself is she misses me. Would you guys agree? Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 No, I think you should reply "well what are you going to do about it?" Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 No, I think you should reply "well what are you going to do about it?" Even if OP is in denial about it, he's the one who initiated the break up. I don't think it's up to her to fix it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 Even if OP is in denial about it, he's the one who initiated the break up. I don't think it's up to her to fix it. Ok i think we both contributed to the break. Could really do with something more reserved to say here? I dont think its right to tell her that i miss her because she could just being do this to get my attention on a bad day Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Even if OP is in denial about it, he's the one who initiated the break up. I don't think it's up to her to fix it. Eh, really? declared to me that she needed to find herself and lover herself, before she could give herself to me fully. Sounds like she's the one with commitment issues. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ap10 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 Eh, really? Sounds like she's the one with commitment issues. Shall i say 'Whats this all about??' Link to post Share on other sites
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