Simon Phoenix Posted July 2, 2013 Share Posted July 2, 2013 Ya true i just dont want her thinking i hate her cos i really dont. ah she has never been there though, just find it strange. You need to stop worrying about what she thinks. You need to start doing things that will help yourself. You are sabotaging yourself by putting her possible thoughts ahead of your own well-being. Look at you, you are doing mental gymnastics about something as insignificant as a Facebook like. That's not healthy or productive. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 Ya your right im a complete mess, i may just deactivate my account. a few girls have wrote to me since but have no interest. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 Wish i could just erase her like in that film Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Wish i could just erase her like in that film Can't you? Delete her posts and block her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 Can't you? Delete her posts and block her. Ill still keep checking though! Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Discipline man, discipline! There really is no other way. You're tormenting yourself. Go date, find other things to do to help you keep her out of your mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 your right just really struggling at the moment, she seems to have moved on so fast and seems so happy Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Ill still keep checking though! You'll just have to stop. And you can do it, you are a fully-functioning adult. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 I know but can you move on that fast and not miss someone its been three weeks and we were on a break before it for a week. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 "shes not happy but its something she has to do, she needs the space for herself" Anyone tell me, cos im so confused Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 I know but can you move on that fast and not miss someone its been three weeks and we were on a break before it for a week. I really don't know what you are asking right now. "shes not happy but its something she has to do, she needs the space for herself" Anyone tell me, cos im so confused STOP OVERANALYZING! There's no hidden riddle. She doesn't want to be with you right now. The rest of it is nonsense she threw it there to make it sound good. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 ah ya sorry, was her friend telling me this Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 ah ya sorry, was her friend telling me this When her friends bring stuff up, tell them you'd rather not discuss it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 I suppose i like hearing how she is doing, not using it for hope or anything. Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Anyone can cheat and emotionally detach while in a relationship. You might look back and notice subtle things. You have to remember that she is in a different place than you right now. She had a jump start on you if she was cheating. She was probably detached awhile ago. I'm sorry; I know it hurts, but it happens everyday sadly. Doesn't make you situation any easier, but just know that there are others here who have been through this. One of the most helpful parts of this site, for me, has been that I am able to see others who are going through or who have been through the same thing as me. These things play out the same so often if you start reading these threads. I think it saved me from making a fool of myself in the early days of the breakup:-) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 Anyone can cheat and emotionally detach while in a relationship. You might look back and notice subtle things. You have to remember that she is in a different place than you right now. She had a jump start on you if she was cheating. She was probably detached awhile ago. I'm sorry; I know it hurts, but it happens everyday sadly. Doesn't make you situation any easier, but just know that there are others here who have been through this. One of the most helpful parts of this site, for me, has been that I am able to see others who are going through or who have been through the same thing as me. These things play out the same so often if you start reading these threads. I think it saved me from making a fool of myself in the early days of the breakup:-) While she emotionally detached i believe she definitely didnt cheat she said this alot and so all mutual friends, she was cheated on before and she cant even tell me a small white lie without feeling terrible. I 110% believe she didnt cheat. Yes agreed seeing others in similar situations although i wish it on noone is comforting in ways knowing we are all in this together. I have made a fool of myself i think but im going to go NC and if its true love, we will find a way back to each other. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 I suppose i like hearing how she is doing, not using it for hope or anything. That's not going to help you in the least. The less you hear, the better. You really need to go NC in the worst way. It's obvious your method doesn't work. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 4, 2013 Author Share Posted July 4, 2013 That's not going to help you in the least. The less you hear, the better. You really need to go NC in the worst way. It's obvious your method doesn't work. I know ya its nearly been three weeks and a week since we talked and its as hard as the day she did it. Her friend is the only person i can talk to. Link to post Share on other sites
Maverick1983 Posted July 4, 2013 Share Posted July 4, 2013 She wants to be single for now is just another less severe way of saying she doesn't want to be with you.Why should that be good enough for you? You shouldn't have to wait in hope that some day she will want you back and everything will be back the way it was, you deserve better then that.Yes she will miss you but a lot of people make the mistake that this means there is a chance.She will miss your friendship and your company but there's more to a relationship then that and I've experienced that myself.While there is always a possibility in a reunion you shouldn't have to put your life on hold for anyone.Go out and live your life and if in time the opportunity presents itself fair enough but I wouldn't invest your feelings or sanity on a possibility.Good luck 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 4, 2013 Author Share Posted July 4, 2013 She wants to be single for now is just another less severe way of saying she doesn't want to be with you.Why should that be good enough for you? You shouldn't have to wait in hope that some day she will want you back and everything will be back the way it was, you deserve better then that.Yes she will miss you but a lot of people make the mistake that this means there is a chance.She will miss your friendship and your company but there's more to a relationship then that and I've experienced that myself.While there is always a possibility in a reunion you shouldn't have to put your life on hold for anyone.Go out and live your life and if in time the opportunity presents itself fair enough but I wouldn't invest your feelings or sanity on a possibility.Good luck your right, i just feel that my poor attitude towards the end of the relationship caused all this, and given space and reflection where i can improve myself, i keep kidding myself that i have some sort of shot. Sadly its the only thing getting me through all this! Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 4, 2013 Share Posted July 4, 2013 I know ya its nearly been three weeks and a week since we talked and its as hard as the day she did it. Her friend is the only person i can talk to. Then you need to make more friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 5, 2013 Author Share Posted July 5, 2013 ran into her mother today, was so awkward and feel terrible now, i really want her back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 5, 2013 Author Share Posted July 5, 2013 the last week is the longest i have ever gone to speaking to my ex in the last 7 years, together for 5. I saw her relative in town today and couldnt take it and broke NC ( i know I shouldnt have). She was real nice half the time, then kind of short the next, she said she is ok and sorry for not talking that she needed space, have i made a fool of myself? I really want her back. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 5, 2013 Share Posted July 5, 2013 the last week is the longest i have ever gone to speaking to my ex in the last 7 years, together for 5. I saw her relative in town today and couldnt take it and broke NC ( i know I shouldnt have). She was real nice half the time, then kind of short the next, she said she is ok and sorry for not talking that she needed space, have i made a fool of myself? I really want her back. Yes you did. STOP TALKING TO HER!!!!!!!!!!! I mean, at what point do you realize that by contacting her you are basically bashing your head against a brick wall. You are never going to get her back by acting the way you are. You probably won't get her back acting other ways, but you are basically guaranteeing it every time you do crap like this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jerryh Posted July 5, 2013 Author Share Posted July 5, 2013 Yes you did. STOP TALKING TO HER!!!!!!!!!!! I mean, at what point do you realize that by contacting her you are basically bashing your head against a brick wall. You are never going to get her back by acting the way you are. You probably won't get her back acting other ways, but you are basically guaranteeing it every time you do crap like this. She wrote to me congratulating me so i just had to write back, couldnt help myself, weak i know. Link to post Share on other sites
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