sweetjasmine Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Odds are pretty good if she's overweight, she's obese. He said she's "not very slim" (didn't even use the word "fat") and that he only knew for sure when he saw her naked. So I kind of doubt she's obese. And, btw, I'm "not very slim" but am not overweight. I eat well and exercise regularly. But I bet OP would refer to me as "not very slim." So I'm not sure where you're getting "obese" from. By 2040 American statistics show that if the trend continues, 75% of americans will be overweight, and 40% obese. Yet we should tolerate this? What does this have to do with one person using someone else even though they don't find that person attractive?
dreamingoftigers Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 In a completely unrelated to this thread note. I have this problem. A little over 3 months ago I stopped eating crappy food and hopped on a treadmill. Since then I've lost over 40 pounds, I'm still a good 40-60 pounds overweight but I have NO 'laziness' left in me and I probably work out more than 90% of people. By the end of the summer I'm going to look GOOD, but right now I still look overweight (albeit less so). So this annoys me. /rant One thing that really pissed me off was being 46 days into diet and having lost about 45 lbs and people still giving me unsolicited tips on how to lose weight, piss off! If I wanted to I know how, and if I don't want to then I clearly don't want the advice.
Rorschach Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 One thing that really pissed me off was being 46 days into diet and having lost about 45 lbs and people still giving me unsolicited tips on how to lose weight, piss off! If I wanted to I know how, and if I don't want to then I clearly don't want the advice. I still chuckle when people say things like 'oh yeah you should do this if you want to lose weight' or 'man it's hard to lose weight I hope you can keep it off'. I've lost over 40 pounds! I've changed my eating habits and have been working out for 3 months, do you really think I need pointers at this point? But I just smile and nod since they're honestly trying to help haha Personally I'm looking forward to christmas, I rarely see my relatives except at christmas and by then I should be not just slimmed down but really buff (I'm doing some heavy weight lifting and I can already feel large muscles forming under the fat) so then I'll get to see people who haven't seen me in a year when I was 300 pounds and yet I'd be about 200-220 and buff. *cough* and hopefully with a girl on my arm
Jersey Shortie Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Female Fat is Different From Male Fat Men and women do not live in an equal world when it comes to our bodies and specifically body fat. Men are taller with larger muscles and bones and a faster metabolism. At puberty, girls put on fat and boys put on muscle. From fertilization to breastfeeding, women have different physical experiences than men. Fat Storage Women are both blessed and cursed with the ability to store excess body fat. Fat serves an important biological purpose by helping to insulate the body, pad the internal organs and provide energy. And nature has also cleverly designed women’s bodies to carry almost double the amount of body fat as men because we bear and nourish babies. Fat is the primary energy source our bodies use to support fetal development. Therefore, to keep it available for the developing fetus, our bodies tend to store extra fat in the abs, hips, butt and thighs. Women need at least 10 to 12 percent of their body weight to be composed of essential fat while men need 2 to 4 percent. Women have a higher requirement because of the demands of childbearing. What is a normal body fat percentage? A normal body fat percentage range for the average woman is 18 to 26% of body weight, while a normal range for a man is 9 to 15%. This includes essential and storage fat. However, to accommodate all fitness levels and ages, the American Council on Exercise believes that women can be between 14 to 31 percent body fat and still be considered “healthy” while can men can have a range of 6 to 25 percent Women are naturally ‘’fatter’’ than men. Past studies of two American migrant groups (the Donner Party and the Willie Handcart Company) that were stranded in mountain blizzards in the mid-1800’s show that more men than women died. The researchers believe that it was a higher body-fat percentage that protected the women. Due to a higher fat percentage, a woman is naturally softer than a man. To expect a woman’s body to be as lean and as muscular as a man is to go against nature’s design. Even at 20 percent body fat, some areas of a woman’s body will have extra fat. Covert Bailey, author of ‘’Fit or Fat’’, observes that ‘’healthy women do jiggle’’. He writes, ‘’The buttock and thigh muscles may be quite firm, but most women, unless they are very young or have inherited thin legs and hips, carry a wiggling layer of fat in that area. Even super-athletic women – those who play professional tennis or run marathons – are not as solid in the hips and thighs as their moderately active male friends – this is simply part of being a woman.’’ Fat distribution patterns Fat is not distributed equally throughout the body. It is different for men and women. Men tend to store most of their fat in their trunk and upper body while women have most of their fat in their lower abdomen, hips, thighs, and buttocks. These differences in fat distribution show up during adolescence. During childhood, boys and girls have the same body structure. Fat cells behave differently. A fat cell has been described as a “tiny plastic bag that holds a drop of fat”. It was previously thought that all fat cells had the same function – to passively store and release energy. Scientists now believe that fat cells have different biochemical receptors or triggers. They have identified two kinds of receptors – alpha-receptors, which cause the storage of fat; and beta-receptors, which cause the release of fat. And wouldn’t you know it? The fat cells in the hips, thighs and buttocks have more fat-retaining or alpha-receptors while the fat cells in the abdomen tend to have more beta, or fat-releasing, receptors. Scientists have also found that hormones influence these receptors. Male hormones tend to trigger the beta or fat releasing, receptors, while female hormones tend to stimulate alpha, or fat-retaining, receptors. This explains why hip and thigh fat is so stubborn to remove. Hormones Estrogen is a hormone responsible for secondary female sex characteristics and can influence the body’s enzymes to store fat in the lower body, while suppressing the storage of fat in the upper body. Women may have noticed that when they diet, the first place they see lost inches is in your bust area. Pregnancy Throughout pregnancy, fat cells not only expand, but they can multiply in number. When pregnancy is over, those fat cells remain and are always ready to expand in size whenever your intake of calories surpasses the energy you use. (Take that donut out of your mouth right now!) With each pregnancy, the weight loss dilemma is compounded further. The thyroid gland, which also drives the metabolism, notoriously becomes sluggish during pregnancy in order to help the body hold on to fat. Why Men Have It Easier Compared to women, men are generally quicker to lose weight as a result of regular exercise. They tend to carry their fat in the upper body, and those cells are more prone to release fat than the fat cells in the lower body, where women tend to store extra weight. Women are also more likely to increase their total fat cell count, both at puberty and during pregnancy, which men don’t have to deal with. One of the reasons for this difference between the sexes is that testosterone, the male hormone, stimulates bone and muscle growth. Men don’t lose testosterone at the rate that women lose estrogen. As a result, men retain more muscle and more bone minerals as they age, giving them higher metabolisms and making them less likely to develop osteoporosis. Some interesting facts on men and women and our different bodies. I know that we have an a health crisis in this country and that a lot of people are over-weight but I also think we have unrealistic views on what is healthy on the opposite side of the spectrum as well. We can’t all look like Gwyneth Patrol. It's so weird that women are held to a higher standard of being skinny when we are the ones that are naturally more fatty. Maybe men would prefer if women didn’t age past 15 because at that age, you’re not a fully developed women with all the cruves and fat you are going to have as an adult. Even th ideal that women should have huge breasts and tiny little waists in unrealistic because the article above states that women are most likely to gain weight in their abs, thighs and butts before their bustline. Women don’t get implants to be more “proportional”. They get them to fit into a media created unrealistic ideal about what a woman’s body should be compared to what it naturally is. We have so many things working against us due to hormones and having babies, and we don't even get men to support us very much even though our bodies are naturally more fatty and ever changing when we have their babies. I know a lot of women would be happy if they could have the disproportional body of some flat image in a magazine with not an ounce of fat and huge breasts that their men covet but we can't. We are real people and real women do have fatty areas. More so then men. Why can’t men appreciate a woman’s *real* body more then they seem to be able to appreciate the fantasy Playmate ideal? It’s like men want women with the bodies of 14 year olds but with huge unrealistic breasts and butts.
CarrieT Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 One thing that really pissed me off was being 46 days into diet and having lost about 45 lbs and people still giving me unsolicited tips on how to lose weight, piss off! If you have seriously lost a pound a day, you need to be REALLY careful! That sounds incredibly unhealthy and way too fast. Two pounds a week should be the max -- if this is true, you are setting yourself up for gallbladder failure.
sally4sara Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 I call bullsh*t on this. Most of the time it's pertaining to weight. I don't see very many posts where a guy is called an ass for stringing someone along... But whenever it's about weight everyone gets in a tizzy about it. Look, I am not disagreeing that the guy shouldn't string her along. He definately shouldn't. But defending the weak of mind because they are "themselves, and should be valued for themselves" isn't a very good mindset to put forth when this country (USA) is at 50% or more obesity rate. I have zero pity for the people who are overweight and do nothing to fix it, unless it is a medical condition, you always have the power to change it. You're seeing one right now. Address THIS post, not the ones you've already seen. Not one single person is telling him he is wrong for his preferences. They are telling him he is wrong because he is using her. We've even scene Lino acting like woggle's coworkers - its totally okay to hurt this girl because other girls have hurt other men.
bananarama1 Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 my teeth hurt just reading this post. well all she needs to do is some cardio. why the tummy tuck? can u even get a tummy tuck if u havent had kids?
silic0ntoad Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 You're seeing one right now. Address THIS post, not the ones you've already seen. Not one single person is telling him he is wrong for his preferences. They are telling him he is wrong because he is using her. We've even scene Lino acting like woggle's coworkers - its totally okay to hurt this girl because other girls have hurt other men. Rubbish. I never said it was OK to string this girl along, Sally. Read above before you put words in my mouth. I am referring to earlier posts where people were bashing this guy in particular in this thread for being shallow. Hell, even JS and I agree that he can have body preference but shouldn't string her along. Do I think the guy is an ass for having preference? No. But others here do and did judge him for it, read the posts. On the note of him stringing her along, like I said, he shouldn't do it, but, he will anyway.
OpenGL Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 I want you to see something, OpenGL. You started this thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t230289/ In it you very specifically said, "Why are the odds stacked so heavily against us? Why does society spit in our face?" And you go on and say, "Another misconception, average guys are not looking for models, far from it. We are looking for our equals, the problem is our equals are out seeking above average and far above average looking guys. Those guys have no problem servicing those women with booty calls, but never a real relationship (as the blogger mentions). This leads the women to believe "all guys are jerks" And my looks are just fine (average), and my post was referring to average guys, not fat slobs." Do you realize how much your post in this thread contradicts your bemoaning your lack of being able to get a date? It sounds like the woman this OP is considering dumping is NORMAL and yet you are propagating the belief that he should dump her because she is not PERFECT. Do you get the hypocrisy of your statements? Do you see how you are being representative of the male race in demanding perfection of us women and yet won't accept someone who is not 100% perfect? So your whole point is because I said average men don't go after models, and me being average not wanting a fat girl, I am contradicting myself? So it's either models or a fat chick? Did you miss the point where I said average? As in average weight, average face, average shape, etc? AVERAGE, not fat, not model thin (which I don't even like). I like women who have normal weight and normal curves anyway.
CarrieT Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 So your whole point is because I said average men don't go after models, and me being average not wanting a fat girl, I am contradicting myself? So it's either models or a fat chick? Did you miss the point where I said average? As in average weight, average face, average shape, etc? AVERAGE, not fat, not model thin (which I don't even like). I like women who have normal weight and normal curves anyway. I believe you are contradicting yourself because in today's world, the AVERAGE size of a girl is 12 and for most guys, that is considered fat. I got new for you; THIS is average and I'm willing to bet $100 that guys like you would think it is fat: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_IA5nokOFh84/RpyOU9wSdsI/AAAAAAAAAWQ/R2m4Z2x7V20/s400/img-ad-campaign.jpg
silic0ntoad Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 I believe you are contradicting yourself because in today's world, the AVERAGE size of a girl is 12 and for most guys, that is considered fat. I got new for you; THIS is average and I'm willing to bet $100 that guys like you would think it is fat: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_IA5nokOFh84/RpyOU9wSdsI/AAAAAAAAAWQ/R2m4Z2x7V20/s400/img-ad-campaign.jpg 2nd from the left. SOOOO cute. I'd chill with her.
silic0ntoad Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Just to prove my point though, by MEDICAL standards, at least 2 girls in that pic are overweight. You know being overweight and obesity costs the US government $117 billion dollars in direct and indirect medical expenses per year? MMMMMmmmmm big mac.
carhill Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 I started going out with this woman, very pretty face, recent boob job, but she isn't very slim ... defintely can't wear a bikini, she says she's getting a tummy tuck later this year... uggh, but everything is else is fine with her, partying, we click, sex is good... but not the slim type ... WTF.... anyone in that situation? I could just dump her... but we do have a good time together... OP, I was married to someone who was 'overweight'. With that out of the way, I think you got some good advice in this thread. Put it to use now and move on.
OpenGL Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 I believe you are contradicting yourself because in today's world, the AVERAGE size of a girl is 12 and for most guys, that is considered fat. I got new for you; THIS is average and I'm willing to bet $100 that guys like you would think it is fat: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_IA5nokOFh84/RpyOU9wSdsI/AAAAAAAAAWQ/R2m4Z2x7V20/s400/img-ad-campaign.jpg I don't consider any of those girls fat with the girl on the far right being a bit iffy. I'd have to see more pictures of her. And yes, you are right in the fact that most girls in today's world are very fat, so maybe I should of said "normal", not fat. I am 11% body fat, 5'7, and weigh 140lbs. According to: http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/growthcharts2/f/avg_ht_female.htm http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/growthcharts2/f/avg_wt_female.htm The average height of a woman is 5'4 and average weight is 163lbs. Do you honestly think I should be dating a woman 3 inches shorter and 25lbs heavier than me? Why do you think it's contradictory to expect a girl I would be interested in to be 5'4 163lbs (fat)?
Rorschach Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Just to prove my point though, by MEDICAL standards, at least 2 girls in that pic are overweight. You know being overweight and obesity costs the US government $117 billion dollars in direct and indirect medical expenses per year? MMMMMmmmmm big mac. And thats why medical standards as far as weight and health are concerned are complete and total BS. Just throwing that out there.
OpenGL Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 And thats why medical standards as far as weight and health are concerned are complete and total BS. You don't think the one on the far right, medically, could be considered fat?
Horse41 Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Obesity is a fine line with overweight. I use the term loosely, as very few people actually understand the minor differences between overweight and obesity. Obesity rates in the us are among the highest in the world with 64% of adults being overweight or obese, and 26% are obese. That means 2/3 of all people 18+ are overweight, and 1/4th of all overweight people are obese. Odds are pretty good if she's overweight, she's obese. By 2040 American statistics show that if the trend continues, 75% of americans will be overweight, and 40% obese. Yet we should tolerate this? I am in no way saying I am a greek god, here. I am average. Not overweight, not built, but I exercise and keep healthy. Do I think everyone should be chiseled out of stone? No. But I do think people need to be held accountable for themselves and not defended by others if they CHOOSE to ignore the problem, or solve it by superficial methods (Plastic surgery, etc.) If it were so easy, very few would be Obese.
silic0ntoad Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 And thats why medical standards as far as weight and health are concerned are complete and total BS. Just throwing that out there. Sure. I guess Diabetes is a lie? Or heart disease? Or fatty liver disease? You know, since being overweight and obese is a fallacy created by the medical system, the people who were average (overweight or obese by medical standards) by your standards must have died by natural causes, right? Oh, wait...
OpenGL Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 If it were so easy, very few would be Obese. No, people (both men and women) are lazy. It is VERY easy to be in shape. It's also fairly easy to have a chiseled body but I of course don't expect the women I date to have anywhere near that type of body.
silic0ntoad Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 If it were so easy, very few would be Obese. This is the mentality I despise. "It's not easy, so let's just call it even." No. Get off your azzes and run some laps. And put down the cheese burger for a fish filet and rice pilaf. It's NOT that hard, that's the problem; it's so EASY to become fat and lazy. Compared to actually working out and caring about yourself, I guess, that could be considered "hard."
OpenGL Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Honestly the vast majority of women could be in a normal weight range without spending a single day on the treadmill. For 90% of cases a proper diet would do it. And I don't mean starve yourself, I just mean a proper diet without sugars, fats, and refined carbs.
CarrieT Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 The average height of a woman is 5'4 and average weight is 163lbs. Do you honestly think I should be dating a woman 3 inches shorter and 25lbs heavier than me? Why do you think it's contradictory to expect a girl I would be interested in to be 5'4 163lbs (fat)? You've stated it yourself; you want an AVERAGE girl and yet you are here, stating that an AVERAGE girl is beneath you. Yep, I think you are contradicting yourself. You don't want AVERAGE -- you want what you think is "normal" and is not. I'm not blaming you; men are subjected to the plastic surgery girls in porn and in magazines and think it is an ideal when it is not. Yes, Carhill is right and America has an obesity epidemic. That is not the issue in your statement, OpenGL. It is you and all the other guys who want an ideal and are forcing girls into bulimia and anorexia in their attempts to gain an ideal that is not attainable.
Horse41 Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 This is the mentality I despise. "It's not easy, so let's just call it even." No. Get off your azzes and run some laps. And put down the cheese burger for a fish filet and rice pilaf. It's NOT that hard, that's the problem; it's so EASY to become fat and lazy. Compared to actually working out and caring about yourself, I guess, that could be considered "hard." People do try, but we're not all built the same. You have a mentality I despise, so we'll call it even.
Rorschach Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 Sure. I guess Diabetes is a lie? Or heart disease? Or fatty liver disease? You know, since being overweight and obese is a fallacy created by the medical system, the people who were average (overweight or obese by medical standards) by your standards must have died by natural causes, right? Oh, wait... The entire medical industry is pretty F'd up if you really look into it. No I don't judge health by the governments height/weight charts and body fat percentages. It is a far more complicated issue than that, which is why the governements numbers on obesity is BS.
USMCHokie Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 I am 11% body fat, 5'7, and weigh 140lbs. The average height of a woman is 5'4 and average weight is 163lbs. Do you honestly think I should be dating a woman 3 inches shorter and 25lbs heavier than me? Why do you think it's contradictory to expect a girl I would be interested in to be 5'4 163lbs (fat)? No, people (both men and women) are lazy. It is VERY easy to be in shape. It's also fairly easy to have a chiseled body but I of course don't expect the women I date to have anywhere near that type of body. You could probably stand to gain a little weight...
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