BG1985 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Chat Room Hero, old-fashioned women didn't put out for an expensive dinner as they typically waited until marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
Jerry18 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 dude.. I'm 46.. I'm living in my fantasy world and have been for many years... It isn't about saving money.. I save money and so does my wife.. but I can tell you that if I had pulled out the gift card before my first date with my wife I wouldn't have gotten to the second date.. That Son.. is real world.. Then maybe you picked the wrong girl to be your wife. Using a gift card doesn't even "save" money. If he wanted to save money then he would've gone to McDonalds rather than a real restaurant. What's so different about a gift card? Link to post Share on other sites
BG1985 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 How does a gift card not save money? Everyone else on this restaurant seems to think it's saving money. I think it's saving money. Link to post Share on other sites
Left in a Lurch Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Chat Room Hero, old-fashioned women didn't put out for an expensive dinner as they typically waited until marriage. They also knew never to talk back to a man or dispute what he says. And yes, they did put out. Link to post Share on other sites
Jerry18 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 How does a gift card not save money? Everyone else on this restaurant seems to think it's saving money. I think it's saving money. Tell me the difference between paying $50 to buy the gift card and paying $50 to buy the meal. Do $50 gift cards cost less than $50? Link to post Share on other sites
boundaryproblem Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 They also knew never to talk back to a man or dispute what he says. Really? oops. I just like the tension of male/female dynamics. If a man doesn't pay for my meal on a first date, it is no big deal. But then I'll have to look for him to control/dominate/protect at some other point in the night. If he offers to pay for parking, it just isn't the same. Link to post Share on other sites
Left in a Lurch Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Tell me the difference between paying $50 to buy the gift card and paying $50 to buy the meal. Do $50 gift cards cost less than $50? Not that I am agreeing it is cheap or tacky, but a $50 gift card given by someone else cost that giftee $0. Link to post Share on other sites
BG1985 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Not at all. Why would you buy a gift card for yourself? Chances are this was a gift from someone else, which makes this equivalent to re-gifting. Link to post Share on other sites
boundaryproblem Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 I'm not taking issue with the poster here, but I find it funny when women say they are old fashioned. It means they are old fashioned and want the man to pay, but it doesn't mean they are old fashioned and want to do what the man says, let the man order for them, put out for an expensive dinner, pretend they don't understand politics, then cook for the guy and clean his place as they are dating. They probably don't like the guy to refer to them as his new "skirt" either or introduce them as the dizzy broad they are dating. They are old fashioned as far as what they expect from the guy, but what old fashioned things do women live up to for those same men in return? Nada. I think the only thing missing here is mutual respect. If you re-phrase all of this, but add mutual respect - are we really so far off of what day to day living together is? Try rephrasing it with respect and I'll come back and read it - and see if I agree. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 A $50 gift card.. costs $50... no matter how you put it.. if it was given to him.. so what? it's still a $50 gift card.. A gift card is NOT a coupon... it's like a credit card.. same money value as cash.. geeezz people... Link to post Share on other sites
jw90063 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 I think if the guy had a money issue or was just cheap, or whatever, he would have went with the getting coffee or drinks idea. I would think it would typically be cheaper to get drinks than dinner. If he was so cheap or broke, looks like he would fear paying more even with the gift card when going to dinner. I actually used a gift card from Outback the other month, and still paid out more. I don't actually classify that place as all that cheap. Link to post Share on other sites
Left in a Lurch Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Really? oops. I just like the tension of male/female dynamics. If a man doesn't pay for my meal on a first date, it is no big deal. But then I'll have to look for him to control/dominate/protect at some other point in the night. If he offers to pay for parking, it just isn't the same. I wasn't taking issue at all with what you posted Boundary, just pointing out it's funny when women expect traditional roles from men but don't expect to conform to their tradional roles as well. I'm traditional when it comes to paying etc., but I don't expect a woman to do anything special or hold her to a standard on a date or consider it a deal breaker if she doesn't conform to expectations I place on her. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamergrl Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Well actually.... There's a company that sells gift cards for less the what they are worth. So you can save money by using a gift card. Also, it is saving money if it was a gift, in a sense, because it's not coming out of his or her pocket. Link to post Share on other sites
jw90063 Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 Haha, Omg, Check this out: http://www.wowt.com/blogs/daybreak/22856689.html Link to post Share on other sites
crazy_grl Posted November 6, 2009 Share Posted November 6, 2009 A $50 gift card.. costs $50... no matter how you put it.. if it was given to him.. so what? it's still a $50 gift card.. A gift card is NOT a coupon... it's like a credit card.. same money value as cash.. geeezz people... Exactly. If somebody had given him $50 in cash and he paid with that, is that cheap too? Link to post Share on other sites
BG1985 Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 It's a whole different story if someone else gives him $50 cash, as long as he doesn't tell the girl, "Hey look, my parents gave me $50 so that we can go out to dinner!" It's the gift card itself that is the issue. Link to post Share on other sites
crazy_grl Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 It's a whole different story if someone else gives him $50 cash, as long as he doesn't tell the girl, "Hey look, my parents gave me $50 so that we can go out to dinner!" It's the gift card itself that is the issue. I don't think it is a whole different story. Either way, he's still using money that he was given on her. The form of the money doesn't make a difference. Link to post Share on other sites
BG1985 Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 If the girl sees a $50 bill, she'll just assume it's his and think nothing of it. The gift card gives off a different vibe. Perception is reality. It doesn't matter where the $50 came from. Link to post Share on other sites
crazy_grl Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 But, as has been said, if the girl cares that much about it, I think that says more about her than about him. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 I don't think it is a whole different story. Either way, he's still using money that he was given on her. The form of the money doesn't make a difference. agree... he could have said.. hey I've got a gift card for '____ resto' how about we use it Saturday'.. or something like that.. the guy is not a 50-year old guy.. he's only 26. there is a lot of 'shallowness' going on.. not all young people (college or not) have a date at a 5-star restaurant.. and spend hundred of dollars on a girl they might never see again... Link to post Share on other sites
jw90063 Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 If the girl sees a $50 bill, she'll just assume it's his and think nothing of it. The gift card gives off a different vibe. Perception is reality. It doesn't matter where the $50 came from. You mean if a gold-digger girl sees the gift card. A regular person with manners, might actually be relieved of the gift card as form of payment, because that means the guy has to pay less for their lazy butt to eat. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 Well, from a quick reading of the discourse, the universal advice of recommending a man keep his mouth shut rather than insert his foot in it seems applicable. Not that I ever follow it. OP, I skimmed....did you go out with this guy? If you haven't yet, do it just as an experiment. I for one would be interested in the results Link to post Share on other sites
BG1985 Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 I'm not saying he has to take her to a 5-star restaurant, and neither did the OP. She said she's just fine eating at Outback. She also said that she first suggested either coffee or grabbing a few drinks. When someone jokingly suggested star-gazing, she actually thought that sounded like a great idea. It's just not wise to tell someone that you are going to use a gift card on a first date. Carhill, the OP is going to go on this date because she said he seemed like a nice enough guy anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 Well.. that's your opinion.. I happen to think that a gift card is OK ... I can't wait to see how the date goes..OP keep us informed.. Link to post Share on other sites
SincereOnlineGuy Posted November 7, 2009 Share Posted November 7, 2009 (edited) This just seems kind of cheap to me...thoughts? I'd say "wrong" Clearly using a coupon is allowed to leave that impression, but as a gift card spends just like cash, and is/was a mere 'gift' from someone, it doesn't count as having sought some sort of a 'discounted evening'. Your implication is like suggesting that using the cash found inside easter eggs, or attached to a money tree, is being "cheap" on a first date... OR, that it is somehow 'cheap' to invite someone over for dinner on a 'first date' and use the Crock Pot given to you by your ex in-laws to cook the meal. Why, pray tell, would using a gift card be seen as anything different from using a credit card on a first date? Edited November 7, 2009 by SincereOnlineGuy Link to post Share on other sites
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