Question for Guys 40 - 50

[Balthazar]

But how do men expect women to have love and trust in them as men if men consider women replacable, or less worthy of male affection, for having the nerve to age? 20 year old college girls trump all is the message I garner from men. No matter what his age is, 20 or 50. No real live breathing human woman can ever live up to those unfair expectations.

 

 

 

 

Apparently to some degree some men do see women as nothing more of a commodity for their youth. When the Olsen Twins turned 18, there were websites dedicated to having a count down clock to when they would be "legal". How many women make websites dedicated to when young 17 year old boys finally turn 18 and are now "legal"?

 

How much porn is out there where the majority of women in it are in the 18-25 age range. Even as a woman in her youth, it's depressing. Because what men value, completely makes women seem to be less deserving of male affection for the fact they age. At some point, men obviously stop finding women less important and worthy of them.

 

I HATE when a man is out with his wife or family and he checks me out. It is SO disrespectful to his own wife and family. You can't win with men. Can I look foward to the years that my husband "loves" me but is in public and he is checking out the age group that I am now? Or counting down the says for a celebrity actress to turn 18? Is that what men give women to look forward to?

 

 

 

But don't men do this in mild or greater forms everyday? How many 40+ year old men are infront of their computer masturbating to images of perfect bodied 20 year old women who have 40+ year old wives? Who also might even have daughters the same age. How do men expect women to sincerely trust them and want to be vulneable with them in the face of this?

 

 

 

 

 

I thought the topic of this thread was age in relation to men and women, what is so far off about what I am discussing?

 

Sorry Jersey, I can't answer your post.

 

You make valid points, but I don't see them as valid responses to the points I am trying to make.

 

It is as if you are offering opinions on issues that I have not breached.

With that in mind, I don't really think we are disagreeing here; we are not talking about the same things.

 

Concerning the point raised by the OP, I will just have to refer you back to her first post. SHe wanted a male perspective on the issue.

 

CHeers,

[Jersey Shortie]

Sorry Jersey, I can't answer your post.

 

You're coping out. Seeing as it is revelant to the topic, of course you could answer to it.

 

 

 

Concerning the point raised by the OP, I will just have to refer you back to her first post. SHe wanted a male perspective on the issue.

 

Yes, I went back and re-read the OP previously. My comments are related directly to the subject being discussed.

[Balthazar]

You're coping out. Seeing as it is revelant to the topic, of course you could answer to it.

 

 

 

 

 

Yes, I went back and re-read the OP previously. My comments are related directly to the subject being discussed.

 

No, I'm not coping out.

I just see it as a waste of time to start discussing issues that are irrelevant to this thread.

If you read the original post

"Question for guys 40-50" and still think your comments are relevant;

well, what can I say?

 

Why not start a new thread where you can express your points?

[Jersey Shortie]

Why not start a new thread where you can express your points?

 

Why don't you not cop out?

 

The issues being discussed in this treahd are completely relevant to the topic at hand.

 

Anyway, I think I already get the idea about what alot of men think about women. As depressing and disheartening as that is.

[vonerik012]

Jersey,

 

Did you even read the last 2 paragraphs of the article YOU posted???

 

Most men can steer a gentler course just by watching their health. "Despite the new research, there's still a big difference between the female and the male biological clock," says Muller. "When the female's alarm goes off at the end, that's it. For men, the battery slowly winds down. Yes, chance of problems increase as the years pass, but some men have significant DNA damage at 35, while others go on forever—their sperm is fine in their 70s."

Men can't rewind their biological clocks, but they can slow them down, Fisch agrees. Just remember, once you're in your 40s, you're past your maintenance-free years—you have to take care of yourself. "If you want children from then on," he advises, "get into the best shape of your life."

[almost famous]

And I have talked with many other men in the 35+ age-range who do not consider women more appealing or attractive in any way, and want to be in relationships with women in their own age-range, 25 year olds don't appeal to them.

 

I agree with your points.

Preferences are different for each person.

 

I am 38, and am speaking for myself and from my experience and talks with other males of similar ages..

[almost famous]

Well tell Dara Torres and Marsha Cross, who had babies in thier 40's. Like I said, good thing thousands upon thousands of women in their 40's didn't listen to your "stats" and went for their dream, anyway. Oh and their husbands are in the same age range as them, not 60 year old men, in their 40s also. If you guys were right about this, then these women wouldn't have had these husbands, their husbands would have gone for women in their 20s.

 

 

Jersey,

 

Did you even read the last 2 paragraphs of the article YOU posted???

 

Most men can steer a gentler course just by watching their health. "Despite the new research, there's still a big difference between the female and the male biological clock," says Muller. "When the female's alarm goes off at the end, that's it. For men, the battery slowly winds down. Yes, chance of problems increase as the years pass, but some men have significant DNA damage at 35, while others go on forever—their sperm is fine in their 70s."

Men can't rewind their biological clocks, but they can slow them down, Fisch agrees. Just remember, once you're in your 40s, you're past your maintenance-free years—you have to take care of yourself. "If you want children from then on," he advises, "get into the best shape of your life."

[Arise_Serpentor]

I'm around the early 30 area and I love older women! that is if they aren't too wrinkly and have much skin damage from being outside too much!

 

You see, if you weren't hot you wouldn't be getting so much attention!

Be careful with relationships with younger men! If they decide they want children, you might get heart broken!

 

But for now, I say just enjoy!

[Summerday]

If a man is say 24 and a woman is 34, to some it may not seem bad (a 10 yr diff.)

 

But, later on down the line when he is 34 and she is 44, the age may start to be problematic. Then, 44 and 54 (she's now on her way to 60). I'm not one to judge, but I would not date a younger guy, nor would I date a guy who is significantly older.

 

 

I'm with you on this. Although, I have a girlfriend who started dating a 24 year old 3 years ago, and they are still going strong. She is now 44 and he is 27. They have discussed the fact that he wants to have children and she cannot and will not have anymore children so she's aware that this relationship will end one day. Sad.

[Arise_Serpentor]

If a man is say 24 and a woman is 34, to some it may not seem bad (a 10 yr diff.)

 

But, later on down the line when he is 34 and she is 44, the age may start to be problematic. Then, 44 and 54 (she's now on her way to 60). I'm not one to judge, but I would not date a younger guy, nor would I date a guy who is significantly older.

 

 

I'm with you on this. Although, I have a girlfriend who started dating a 24 year old 3 years ago, and they are still going strong. She is now 44 and he is 27. They have discussed the fact that he wants to have children and she cannot and will not have anymore children so she's aware that this relationship will end one day. Sad.

 

Hey, thats what I was saying above!!! And who said i didn't know what i was talking about?!?! I should be a marriage counselor or a relationship counselor!!

[almost famous]

 

I'm with you on this. Although, I have a girlfriend who started dating a 24 year old 3 years ago, and they are still going strong. She is now 44 and he is 27. They have discussed the fact that he wants to have children and she cannot and will not have anymore children so she's aware that this relationship will end one day. Sad.

 

They can always adopt.

Personally I wouldn't date a man that much younger, either. But I still plan on having at least one child.

[Arise_Serpentor]

They can always adopt.

Personally I wouldn't date a man that much younger, either. But I still plan on having at least one child.

 

thats true too! adoption is great! but maybe he wants one from his genes! his own flesh and blood! ahh, the beauty of marriage!!

[Lizzie60]

I might break my 'record' soon...

 

A good friend who got married a few weeks ago.. still call me 2-3 times a week.. we always have 'borderline' phone sex.. he likes to get excited on the phone..

 

We fooled around a few years ago.. and he says he's still obsessed with me.. he still have 'pictures' in his head as he puts it..

 

Since I'm very attracted by black men.. I asked him if he had friends that were single.. (he's black)... He told me his best friend is single but is white.. I specified 'black'...

 

Anyway... he knows me very well.. I tell him every thing about me.. my flings while on vacations, etc.. so he said he knows quite a few guys in their 30s but they're not for me... they're not 'good enough people' he said... but he knows this guy, who's in university, he said I would like him.. he's apparently very good looking.. and old soul.. very mature for his age, smart, etc... problem is, he's 22... that would be the biggest age gap so far for me..

 

This friend knows I prefer younger men.. but he is not sure about this guy.. so he will check with him first, to see if he likes older women..

 

OMG.. OMG.. OMG.. 34 years difference... OMG..

 

We talked again this morning.. but we didn't talk about it.. I told him to just 'check' subtly with this guy.. not mentioning anything about me..

 

Plus.. I might 'chicken' out..

[almost famous]

thats true too! adoption is great! but maybe he wants one from his genes! his own flesh and blood! ahh, the beauty of marriage!!

 

I was adopted as a baby and was loved more than I ever could be by "flesh and blood" parents.

[vonerik012]

Adopt???

 

I had selfish older women on the net telling me this too..

 

"You can marry an older woman and adopt"

 

"You don't need kids, it is overrated"

 

"you can help raise my kids"

 

Why should anyone give up having kids to stick with someone too old to have kids? Ridiculous..Try selling that idea to younger women and see what they think...

[Arise_Serpentor]

I was adopted as a baby and was loved more than I ever could be by "flesh and blood" parents.

 

Well good for yoU!!! But no ever said it was a matter of love!

 

But if you don't think your parents ever wonder what a child would look like or how they would be if they made it themselves, you are mistaken!

[almost famous]

But who are you to say someone is too old to have kids? Also, why are you waiting so late to have kids yourself when your sperm could be worse?

What is selfish is trying to convince women that they are washed up at 40.

If a man really loves a woman, it all works itself out.

[almost famous]

Well good for yoU!!! But no ever said it was a matter of love!

 

But if you don't think your parents ever wonder what a child would look like or how they would be if they made it themselves, you are mistaken!

 

Thanks for that but I was raised solely by my mother after the age of 5 and I will tell you that this is not true in my case. I was adopted because I was really wanted and chosen.

[Jake Barnes]

Adopt???

 

I had selfish older women on the net telling me this too..

 

"You can marry an older woman and adopt"

 

"You don't need kids, it is overrated"

 

"you can help raise my kids"

 

Why should anyone give up having kids to stick with someone too old to have kids? Ridiculous..Try selling that idea to younger women and see what they think...

Yeah, that is incredibly selfish

 

It doesn't surprise me though

[vonerik012]

Jesus Almost famous... What don't you get??

 

Lets say I want a family one day.... Or any man who does..

 

Why spend time with older women above 40? That would not be a good idea. Why you ask?

 

Well when you meet a woman, you might want to date her for a while before deciding to make babies with her. You might date for 2 years, enjoy being married without children for a couple years, then decide to have kids. This would not be possible with a woman over 40.. You might want the child you make to have a brother and sister as well.

 

Sure, you know women who have kids at 38... But, they are already in a relationship.. If you are over 40 and single it still takes time to get to the baby making part...

[almost famous]

Just giving out a possibility if a man was in love with a woman. You are going to have to try to sell yourself to a lot of younger women who want men closer to their own age, btw.

 

What if you married a "younger" woman who turned out to be unable to conceive, which you didn't know before you married? What if you ended up to be shooting blanks yourself? You just divorce?

 

You are telling me I should have had kids earlier, well, then you should have too, your sperm has more chances of being defective.

 

 

Adopt???

 

I had selfish older women on the net telling me this too..

 

"You can marry an older woman and adopt"

 

"You don't need kids, it is overrated"

 

"you can help raise my kids"

 

Why should anyone give up having kids to stick with someone too old to have kids? Ridiculous..Try selling that idea to younger women and see what they think...

[almost famous]

Yes but if I meet a man and he really loves me, he won't take that into account.If we decide to have a child we do, but if we don't, then love is what it's about and the child thing wasn't mean to be. Most men I date at late 30's early 40's already have kids and are divorced. So what's taking you so long? Your sperm is probably defective by now.

 

Jesus Almost famous... What don't you get??

 

Lets say I want a family one day.... Or any man who does..

 

Why spend time with older women above 40? That would not be a good idea. Why you ask?

 

Well when you meet a woman, you might want to date her for a while before deciding to make babies with her. You might date for 2 years, enjoy being married without children for a couple years, then decide to have kids. This would not be possible with a woman over 40.. You might want the child you make to have a brother and sister as well.

 

Sure, you know women who have kids at 38... But, they are already in a relationship.. If you are over 40 and single it still takes time to get to the baby making part...

[vonerik012]

LOL...

 

Well in about 10 years i will be 40.. My grandfather was born in 1870... Men have much more time...Sorry, thats life.

[Summerday]

Jesus Almost famous... What don't you get??

 

Lets say I want a family one day.... Or any man who does..

 

Why spend time with older women above 40? That would not be a good idea. Why you ask?

 

Well when you meet a woman, you might want to date her for a while before deciding to make babies with her. You might date for 2 years, enjoy being married without children for a couple years, then decide to have kids. This would not be possible with a woman over 40.. You might want the child you make to have a brother and sister as well.

 

Sure, you know women who have kids at 38... But, they are already in a relationship.. If you are over 40 and single it still takes time to get to the baby making part...

 

I'm 42 and I don't have kids, but I would like a child ONLY if the man I end up with (hopefully soon) wants a child as well. I will not bring a child into this world to care for him or her by myself, and I will not have a child in a bad relationship, and I would be open to adoption, only if the person I'm with feels the same way. Also, I don't date men younger then 40. I just don't see how dating younger men benefits women other then sexually, and that is not fulfilling enough for me.

[Rooster_DAR]

That's what I think is sad, really.

 

Why are you trying to overemphasize your point? People think she looks younger, it makes her feel better, leave her alone. Lot's of people look young for their age, get over it.