Storyrider Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Yes, my fantasy is huge and I'll come up with something. At least to make life exciting. Like imagine he thinks he's engaged forever, or that he is confused etc etc. I'll give up hope the day I give up hope. Well, what about having a plan B in the meantime? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 I do think you should take him on his word that he is really busy and he might be at a loss for words for a while. Well, when I was writing to him before and he was shooting "Shadow Walkers", he only had about 4 hours home since he spent the whole day in the set. And he'd still send me an email then, before crashing. So, if he wants he'll write. But probably now I'm not top of the list, not like I should be of course. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 Well, what about having a plan B in the meantime? Nah, I don't make plans. Plans sort of come to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Storyrider Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Nah, I don't make plans. Plans sort of come to me. You know what? I would have no problem with any of this, except that you were so miserable when you were pining over him the last two years. That part of it didn't seem to feel very good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 You know what? I would have no problem with any of this, except that you were so miserable when you were pining over him the last two years. That part of it didn't seem to feel very good. Well, if you pin you pin. Kind of like it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I really think he might be busy. It sounds like he barely has time to check his email. I'm not being joking or trite. I have had lots of days like that, where even checking my home email was a chore and then you want to reply with thoughtful replies to the senders but you simply don't have the energy or time the correspondence justice. I do think you should take him on his word that he is really busy and he might be at a loss for words for a while. Please don't encourage an unhealthy obsession. Link to post Share on other sites
Storyrider Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Well, if you pin you pin. Kind of like it is. Yeah. I don't think you're crazy. You're just incredibly stubborn and reality-averse. But you have to be able to live with the fallout from your choices. Just like the job thing. There might be a real "Denver Guy" out there who is wondering what is taking you so long, while you're wasting time and energy with this fake one. Link to post Share on other sites
sfsassy Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I really think he might be busy. It sounds like he barely has time to check his email. I'm not being joking or trite. I have had lots of days like that, where even checking my home email was a chore and then you want to reply with thoughtful replies to the senders but you simply don't have the energy or time the correspondence justice. I do think you should take him on his word that he is really busy and he might be at a loss for words for a while. Why feed this? Link to post Share on other sites
Calisto Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Why feed this? I was just explaining to her that he had stated these things in the email that he was really busy and such. You don't control the board. Link to post Share on other sites
Nevermind Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Oh, honestly. He will answer again. He wrote her days after the other thread, and now he just didn't do s immediately. The drama will continue. Not for him, but Ariadne. Her choice. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 If you're villifying him not because you're actually against the guy, but because you want to turn Ariadne off to him, then give up. It's not working. I haven't seen much evidence to justify doing it otherwise. I'm not saying people are wrong about him, but I am saying no one here knows whether they are right about him. Thats true. DG is definitely not my cup of tea, his past history with his exes would be enough to turn me off, I wouldn't need any more information than that. Whatever anyone says on here doesn't make any difference to the outcome of this story- it will carry on as it has been until A either finds someone new, or realises that she is wasting her time. We concluded this last time, and thats why the last thread was closed. I don't think its necessary to rehash this over another 50 pages. Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Ariadne, I will say just these few words that I feel compelled to say. Thinking on your own and not having others think for you is a wonderful and desirable trait. If anyone is opinionated and lives by her own rules, it is I. That said though, I have also learned to LISTEN and respect other people's opinions as well. It is part of my perennial thirst for learning and expanding my knowledge of myself and the world that surrounds me. Stubbornly holding onto opinions and perspectives is an impediment to self-discovery and the acquisition of knowledge. Even the most ignorant have something to say. I am not saying that you should comply with other people's advice on your situation but what I am saying is that listening to people, really listening, and then trying to process what everyone is saying so that you may come to your own conclusions is a positive attitude and one that that will profit you immensely. I don't know about you but I have learned a lot from people on LS. That's why I stay although the problem that brought here no longer exists. There are certain members in here with great sensitivity and amazing insight. We all stand to gain from these posters (no names mentionned - you know who you are). I suggest you reread both of your threads again and then instead of dismissing everything that has been said, be still for a while and ruminate on what people are trying to communicate to you. Then, come to your own conclusions and act accordingly. You know that I am saying this out of concern because although I do not know you, I care. Marlena Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I don't know about you but I have learned a lot from people on LS. That's why I stay although the problem that brought here no longer exists. There are certain members in here with great sensitivity and amazing insight. We all stand to gain from these posters (no names mentionned - you know who you are). Absolutely. I was quite pig headed and "always right" when I first joined LS. Since then though, I have definitely become better at listening to others opinions and there have even been instances where I have changed my mind based on what others here post. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 I suggest you reread both of your threads again and then instead of dismissing everything that has been said, be still for a while and ruminate on what people are trying to communicate to you. Then, come to your own conclusions and act accordingly. Well, It has also being said that I don't have a problem with it. And I don't. It is you who are seeing the situation and trying to make it fit according to your standards and "fix it". Link to post Share on other sites
vivrantflo Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I suggest you reread both of your threads again and then instead of dismissing everything that has been said, be still for a while and ruminate on what people are trying to communicate to you. Then, come to your own conclusions and act accordingly. lol what's the point?? This thread is just going to go to eight- hundred some odd posts... careen off topic, get closed.. and then ANOTHER one of these long ass, redundant threads about a funny looking film maker will start up.. with zero resolution! lol Loveshack is a trip! Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Well, It has also being said that I don't have a problem with it. And I don't. It is you who are seeing the situation and trying to make it fit according to your standards and "fix it". Then what's the point of posting your threads if you're not seeking input, Ariadne? Is everyone wasting their time posting to your thread? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 Then what's the point of posting your threads if you're not seeking input, Ariadne? Is everyone wasting their time posting to your thread? I dunno. They keep talking. And I like to talk to people of course. Especially if it's about Denver guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 He wrote again! Yey! --------------------- Don't think you are going to psychologically damage me by talking to me. But if you don't want to talk to me because I suck, then I'm fine with that too. No, you don't suck. You're a great person. Caring, supportive, attractive, funny, smart--more than you give yourself credit for. But I was going to stop writing because on Monday you'd said: >>> since writing to me seems to be the cruelest thing you can do to a human being especially since I'm unstable and crazy etc. I don't want to be cruel, I don't want to hurt you. I want you to be happy, successful, all that sort of stuff. But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you. You'd be disappointed anyway when you found that the real me isn't perfect or flawless or all those other wonderful things you're free to imagine that I am as long as it's all just a fantasy that somehow ended up with my name on it. Now if having the fantasy helps by keeping you from having to deal with the real, imperfect people around you, I can understand the psychological value in that. (Though even real, imperfect people can be a lot of fun sometimes.) But that doesn't make it a healthy long-term strategy. That's something you have to decide. I'm not really much of a guru, but on the message boards you'd said a few times that you thought of me that way. Well, as your guru, I think you would be happier if you realized that I'm not some perfect fantasy, just an ordinary guy, and there are a lot of other ordinary (and a few extraordinary) guys out there whom you *could* have a relationship with. You certainly deserve to be happy and I certainly want you to be happy. I haven't read any of the intervening discussions on Loveshack (just the one that our mutual friend pointed out two years or so ago and the two new ones), but from what I've read, it sounds like being hung up on me hasn't been making you happy. What would make you happy? (That's not an "answer right this minute" question; it's just something that you should be thinking about rather than thinking about me--or about some idealized version of me.) Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 I dunno. They keep talking. And I like to talk to people of course. Especially if it's about Denver guy. From all your posts, I'm getting the distinct impression that you're just very bored with your life, and this is purely a source of entertainment for you. Nothing wrong with that, IME, as long as everybody else is on the same page. Nobody likes to be toyed with. Actually, you should know that more than anyone, A... Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 He wrote again! --------------------- Don't think you are going to psychologically damage me by talking to me. But if you don't want to talk to me because I suck, then I'm fine with that too. No, you don't suck. You're a great person. Caring, supportive, attractive, funny, smart--more than you give yourself credit for. But I was going to stop writing because on Monday you'd said: >>> since writing to me seems to be the cruelest thing you can do to a human being especially since I'm unstable and crazy etc. I don't want to be cruel, I don't want to hurt you. I want you to be happy, successful, all that sort of stuff. But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you. You'd be disappointed anyway when you found that the real me isn't perfect or flawless or all those other wonderful things you're free to imagine that I am as long as it's all just a fantasy that somehow ended up with my name on it. Now if having the fantasy helps by keeping you from having to deal with the real, imperfect people around you, I can understand the psychological value in that. (Though even real, imperfect people can be a lot of fun sometimes.) But that doesn't make it a healthy long-term strategy. That's something you have to decide. I'm not really much of a guru, but on the message boards you'd said a few times that you thought of me that way. Well, as your guru, I think you would be happier if you realized that I'm not some perfect fantasy, just an ordinary guy, and there are a lot of other ordinary (and a few extraordinary) guys out there whom you *could* have a relationship with. You certainly deserve to be happy and I certainly want you to be happy. I haven't read any of the intervening discussions on Loveshack (just the one that our mutual friend pointed out two years or so ago and the two new ones), but from what I've read, it sounds like being hung up on me hasn't been making you happy. What would make you happy? (That's not an "answer right this minute" question; it's just something that you should be thinking about rather than thinking about me--or about some idealized version of me.) Thanks DG... a very nice closure email.. I hope Ariadne can take your words and turn them into energy to move on... You have my respect DG... and thanks Ariadne for posting it... Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Thanks DG... a very nice closure email.. I hope Ariadne can take your words and turn them into energy to move on... You have my respect DG... and thanks Ariadne for posting it... + 1!! Ariadne, I know you won't listen but seriously read his email. He's telling you straight up how he perceives you. He wants you to start living again and be happy without him. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Thanks DG... a very nice closure email.. I hope Ariadne can take your words and turn them into energy to move on... You have my respect DG... and thanks Ariadne for posting it... I agree. A, I hope you understand what he is saying and don't interpret it the wrong way and turn it into a fantasy thing that he means the opposite of what was written.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 Thanks DG... a very nice closure email.. I hope Ariadne can take your words and turn them into energy to move on... You have my respect DG... and thanks Ariadne for posting it... + 1!! Ariadne, I know you won't listen but seriously read his email. He's telling you straight up how he perceives you. He wants you to start living again and be happy without him. Oh, But didn't you guys say that he was some narcissistic, selfish, cruel and what not guy? Are you changing your minds? Were you too fast to judge? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ariadne Posted June 25, 2008 Author Share Posted June 25, 2008 My response: -------------------- Ok, And why is that? I want you to be happy, successful, all that sort of stuff. But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you. If I hear your reasons I might understand some more. ---------------- I mean, But you should understand that I'm not looking for a romantic relationship with you. Because the "most" attractive thing to me about you is that you love me. Or at least the fantasy that you love me. And at least before you were saying that you were confused. If you are positive that you are not attracted to me whatsoever... Why would I want to be talking to some dude? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Oh, But didn't you guys say that he was some narcissistic, selfish, cruel and what not guy? Are you changing your minds? Were you too fast to judge? Did you read the email Ariadne ? He was giving you the closure you need... Link to post Share on other sites
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