How do you honestly feel about over weight people

[LN99]

See, that is the problem. People tend to equate skinny with being happy. So, if they are overweight, they figure(or other people figure) they will just have surgery and once they are thin, everything will be fine. How wrong they are...

 

Oprah even had a show about women who lost large amounts of weight and ended up with other problems: binge drinking, being addicted to sex w/ random strangers, drugs, etc.

 

Most of the time, there are deeper problems that lie within... But being skinny isn't gonna fix em. The person needs to get to the root of the problem to actually "feel" better about themselves.

 

Personally, I have been overweight a majority of my life. At one point(4 yrs ago) I lost a good 70lbs and looked and yes, even felt better. I attracted a lot more guys then I do now(I'm bigger again ). But what made me mad inside was that most wouldn't even look twice at me when I was heavier, and suddenly I was "good enough", being skinnier. I also realized that even though I attracted more guys, didn't mean I attracted the RIGHT kind of guys. Personally I think I attracted more of the losers being skinny. So many more options but not exactly the best kind.

Right now (being a bit heavier again), my options are somewhat limited. But in a way (even though it sounds crazy), I know that these guys like me for me.... Its like weeding out the losers....or the guys just looking to get laid. Plus these guys seem to take the time to actually get to KNOW ME for who I am...and not just for my outter appearance. In a way, Im in a happier place. I realize that its not healthy to completely let myself go. But I want to be comfortable. I am for the most part. But I also want people to like me for me. And if they don't...I say screw them.

[Blue Phoenix]

--"Often ignorance is choosing not to see what's obvious to others. There is outward ignorance but there is inward ignorance too. It's called denial"-- That statement suggests to me that you belive that obese people are some how in denial.So what exactly am I and many other obese people suposidly denying?? That we over eat/are addicted to food?? That were all lazy unhealthey people?? Or that were realy deeply uhnappy inside?? Yes what exactly are we trying to deny please?? One thing you are right about is yes there is def ingorance on many diffrent levels and hidden behind many diffrent smoke screens..--"yes i would agree KAMILLE that there are many people who are in good shape but are quite unhappy due to some other factors in their lives"-- WHAT you mean being skinney isent the have all end all of exceptace and happyness REALLY?? who would have thought!! So you mean even if I do lose the weight I may still be unhappy woha..--"But I want to be comfortable. I am for the most part. But I also want people to like me for me. And if they don't...I say screw them"-- Agreed..

[Blue Phoenix]

--"I think people are saying that they don't mean any ill will toward fat people, but they also think that it's a condition that can be corrected"-- It's not a condishion I choose to be this way and I acept it I dont want to be "corrected" I'm happy with me. I simply want and ask for the same respect that every one else already gets in this world.. Now Im going to go back and use the gay argument for a min here.. So if its a correctable condishion and since being so its then ok to condone poor treatment of obese people. Simply because they choose to be this way then would you also say its ok to bash a gay man because he chooses to be gay I mean its a correctable condishion no?? So it would be ok to then put them down because of it hmm I some how think not. Matter of fact I think that many if prob not all of the exact same people that would put obese people down wouldent be caut dead makeing the same type of ingorant sterio typical statemnts about gay peope that they do about obese people. And you know why because that is a type of discrimanation that is no longer as openly accepted and tollerated unlike the way it is for obese people!!

[erika2610]

Ummmm.. first off, a gay man does not 'choose" to be gay - so that's a bad comparison. Secondly Blue, aren't you worried about your health at all?

[Blue Phoenix]

But some people would and have said yes they choose to be gay last I herd that was a open debate.. And secondly erika no I am not worryed about my health I am a healthey person over all I eat right I walk and am active all the time. The idea that over weight automatickly means unhealthey is yet another myth about obese people.. Just like the over weight = unhappy one and so on..

[alphamale]

Ummmm.. first off, a gay man does not 'choose" to be gay - so that's a bad comparison.

Not entirely ERIKA....some obese people are obese due to medical conditions. Thyroid problems, medications, low metablism, genetics, etc...all can contribute to weight gain.

 

I have met individuals are are very skinny yet they eat like pigs and do no exercise.

 

So I thinks its a combo of factors that make poeple what they are.

[erika2610]

Not entirely ERIKA....some obese people are obese due to medical conditions. Thyroid problems, medications, low metablism, genetics, etc...all can contribute to weight gain.

 

I have met individuals are are very skinny yet they eat like pigs and do no exercise.

 

So I thinks its a combo of factors that make poeple what they are.

 

Ok.. point taken. But I have seen some obese people who are perfectly happy being obese. I know of one in particular, he's just morbidly obese, and doesn't care. He shoves whatever he wants in his mouth. He doesn't have any of those conditions - he just doesn't care. I am not one to judge, as I do know that some have conditions such as the ones you mentioned. It's just the ones who are very obese, and just keep eating whatever they want that I don't understand. It's just not healthy.

[a4a]

--"Next time maybe instead of saying 'honestly' say you want people to say what you'd like to hear."-- So your saying I should except personal attacks and neg ridicule because its how people honestly feel?? That mindless ingorance and intolerance about a hole group of people should just be excepted because its how most of sociaity honestly feels about them??

 

People are personally attacked for a variety of reasons. In your particular case you are stating you a happy being fat. So it is your choice to be fat then?

 

So then people think "wow that person chooses to be fat, too bad because they are missing out on some things in life" That is a person having an opinion about anothers choices....... not an attack. Most likely you will indeed find that the majority of people do think (have an opinion) that fat people are missing out on several things in life. This opinion is formed for a variety of reasons.

 

People are teased about glasses, braces, looks in general for a variety of reason.

 

I mean come on you never looked at a person and thought - he or she is just not very good looking..... or you, yourself are immune to this behavior?

 

You certainly have an opinion that gay people spread STDs more....... so let's say that is true....... lets then also look at some facts: that the majority of obese people are missing out/limit activities and oppurtunities of some form because of their physical condition.

[Blue Phoenix]

--"So then people think "wow that person chooses to be fat, too bad because they are missing out on some things in life"-- I just dont get this mentallity that all over weight people are some how missing out on stuff in life what exactly are we supose to be missing out on?? I'm just as active as any thin person I have just as many friends as others I have had love intrests as well so what am I missing out on that thin people can do?? --"I mean come on you never looked at a person and thought - he or she is just not very good looking..... or you, yourself are immune to this behavior?"-- The honest anser to your question is no I myself haveing lived my hole life as a obese person do not make judgements on others looks because I know how that feels you can eather belive me or not but no I do not.

--"People are personally attacked for a variety of reasons. In your particular case you are stating you a happy being fat. So it is your choice to be fat then"-- Yes they are and it dosent make it any more right then attacking me for my size its ingorance plain and simple. --"That is a person having an opinion about anothers choices....... not an attack"-- I dont have any prob with people haveing a opinion what I do have a prob with is them prejudgeing me even tho they dont even know me personaly IE saying im addicted to food or lazy or things of that nature those type of things are attacks and not opinions and they are made based on neg sterio types people have about obese people in genral..Go back a4a and realy read some of the replys I have gotten here one poster even hinted that some people think obese people must be retarted for letting them selves get that way thats a attack and its ingorant no matter what kind of smoke screen they try to hide it behind it is what it is ingorance and almost hate of people they do not accept simply because of there outward apperance!! Let me ask you this you think its ok to put people down I mean if you have in your own mind a valid excuse like there health that makes it right then??

[a4a]

I wonder why you feel the need to state you are a happy person and you are looking for this validation of sorts?

 

If you truly were not caring and realized that the opinions of others did not matter because you were so comfortable, I don't think you would need to pull out the soap box yourself.

 

 

So stay happy and fat...... I don't care..... but you asked for opinions and you got them. (not said in a tone with any disrespect at all)

[Blue Phoenix]

Im not on any soap box really yes I did ask for opinions but whats wrong with trying to change peoples minds about a cirtin subject I dont think anything. I dont need validation but I would like simple respect just like every one else thats all I realy dont think thats to much to ask for..

[a4a]

oh I will put down a fat person and use their outward appearance when doing so....... or a skinny person...... or person with hair growing out of their nose.....if they cause me for some reason to not like them.

 

That stupid nose bush growin' stick of a of a horses turd for brains.........- for example. (nose hairs and skinny)

 

I know a guy that is a real ass and he walks like he has a stick up his butt or he is a waddling duck...... so yep if I am pissed I bring this into the discription of him.

[hotgurl]

I haven't read this whole thread but...

 

I feel sad for very overweight/obese people. Also I wonder how someone can eat thier way to 500 or 1,000 pounds or so and not say to themselves stop!

 

I know there are genic factors and health issues but I really believe most people eat their way to obesity and like an alcoholic they are in denial.

 

Today portions are so out of control when I first joined weigth watchers I thougth I was eating healthy etc.. Until I realized what a portion was. I was way over eating without realizing it!

 

My leader who has lost 80 lbs says she is in her 5th year of foodbriety. I think this is true some people become addicted to food.

 

I was 50lbs overweight and when I went into a size 16 pants I looked at myself in the mirror and said wtf are you doing to yourself.

 

I have a health condition that makes me prone to obesity and I was very sick for a year and couldn't excersise.

 

that maybe partly contributed to the weight gain. But not 100%. I ate every last pound of the 50lbs weight gain and I was just using my illness as an excuse.

 

Also because I do have an illness that predesposes me to obesity & diabetes it is all that more important for me to not be overweight and to eat healthy.

 

So far I've lost 24 lbs and it feels so good. And it just makes me sad that people don't think enough of themselves to take care of thier health.

[Blue Phoenix]

Yes of course you do its human nature to do that when we are angry. But its the people who just put obese people down because they some how see us as less then human. Those are the people I am taking about not the random acts of anger like you described.. --"That stupid nose bush growin' stick of a of a horses turd for brains"-- LoL nose bush intresting..

[Blue Phoenix]

--"So far I've lost 24 lbs and it feels so good. And it just makes me sad that people don't think enough of themselves to take care of thier health"-- See thats were your verry wrong I do take good care of myself I do like myself. Some how I think that the mieda has realy done a bang up job of brain washing every one to help put these ideas in there heads.--"I was 50lbs overweight and when I went into a size 16 pants I looked at myself in the mirror and said wtf are you doing to yourself"-- Wow just wow how sad this is to me you were realy so upset to be a size 16?? Thats not a bad weight at all and cirtinaly not over weight. Again a sighn that sociaity has brain washed most of you into thinking unless you are a 5 or 6 that you are over weight and that to me is more sad then anything no wonder you dont like over weight people. I mean if its horrible to be a size 16 it must be a mortal sin to be my size just sad..

[hotgurl]

-Wow just wow how sad this is to me you were realy so upset to be a size 16?? Thats not a bad weight at all and cirtinaly not over weight. Again a sighn that sociaity has brain washed most of you into thinking unless you are a 5 or 6 that you are over weight and that to me is more sad then anything no wonder you dont like over weight people. I mean if its horrible to be a size 16 it must be a mortal sin to be my size just sad..

 

Well it wasn't just the pants size. Physically I wasn't feeling good. My daughter and So are extremely active and with an extra 50lbs I was having trouble keeping up with them hiking etc.. I felt like I was carrying around this excess weight , which I was. I was tired. Losing 24lbs has really helped my energy level and confidence.

 

and I was obese since I am short 50 lbs was enought to push my BMI up into obese range. And I am not willing to risk diabetes and miss out of activites with my family or feel uncomfortable just to have an extra slice of pizza or an ice cream cone. These are my feeling for myself. I don't think I am brian washed there are some very real health issues for me if am overweight.

[a4a]

--"So far I've lost 24 lbs and it feels so good. And it just makes me sad that people don't think enough of themselves to take care of thier health"-- See thats were your verry wrong I do take good care of myself I do like myself. Some how I think that the mieda has realy done a bang up job of brain washing every one to help put these ideas in there heads.--"I was 50lbs overweight and when I went into a size 16 pants I looked at myself in the mirror and said wtf are you doing to yourself"-- Wow just wow how sad this is to me you were realy so upset to be a size 16?? Thats not a bad weight at all and cirtinaly not over weight. Again a sighn that sociaity has brain washed most of you into thinking unless you are a 5 or 6 that you are over weight and that to me is more sad then anything no wonder you dont like over weight people. I mean if its horrible to be a size 16 it must be a mortal sin to be my size just sad..

 

 

LMAO........ calling someone happy about losing weight "sad"....

 

Again having an extra 50 lbs on you is not healthy...... proven over and over and over again medical study after medical study.... being obese is not healthy... not advertisers but the medical community says so.

 

If you can pull some studies out and post them that firmly state being obese is a grand thing to do for your health I may change my tune and think being obese is good for your health..... or for that matter 50 lb overweight. I may look at fat people as healthy and never think that someone that eats themselves into a store scooter isn't making healthy choices.

[Blue Phoenix]

I said that I think its a sad comentary on sociaity that some one would think there over weight at a size 16. And it is sad that some one of that weight would have those feelings about it. Common you and me bouth know that most women today faint at the idea of ganing any weight at all .And you know why its because they are brainwashed that fat even an extra 10 pounds of it is horrible and disgusting. Why do you think so many poor women fall into the pit of eating disorders?? I think they would rather be dead then god forbid a bit over weight!! and that to me is sad..

[Blue Phoenix]

And if you look back thu my posts I've never once tryed to say being obese is healthey. Matter of fact I've actualy admited a few times that yes it can SOMETIMES cause health probs some times. IE not every obese person is automatickly unhealthey just because they are larger that is a sterio type..

[a4a]

I said that I think its a sad comentary on sociaity that some one would think there over weight at a size 16. And it is sad that some one of that weight would have those feelings about it. Common you and me bouth know that most women today faint at the idea of ganing any weight at all .And you know why its because they are brainwashed that fat even an extra 10 pounds of it is horrible and disgusting. Why do you think so many poor women fall into the pit of eating disorders?? I think they would rather be dead then god forbid a bit over weight!! and that to me is sad..

 

A size 16 is large to some people, some people like wearing a size 5 or 6.... I do..... I hold myself to my own standards.... anything over a 6 to me does mean my butt is looking big in those pants.. ..... my ideal.

 

Just like a hair cut..... not dictated by the world but to what I am happy with on me.

[Blue Phoenix]

--"Just like a hair cut..... not dictated by the world but to what I am happy with on me"-- Ok then fair enough but why cant it then go bouth ways why cant it be what I am happy with on myself as well with out the put downs and genral ingorance?? I still stand by my idea that the media has brainwashed many women into fearing fat. And I wonder if I wasent a obese person makeing that statement if it would be excepted with out as much argurment in the 1st place..

[Star Gazer]

And if you look back thu my posts I've never once tryed to say being obese is healthey. Matter of fact I've actualy admited a few times that yes it can SOMETIMES cause health probs some times. IE not every obese person is automatickly unhealthey just because they are larger that is a sterio type..

 

You are FLAT OUT WRONG.

 

You ARE unhealthy. Your BP, resting heart rate, cholesterol, fitness level, liver enzymes, kidney function, even menstrual cycle are all functioning at a worse level than if you were physically fit. Your heart has to pump harder, your bones suffer greater impact with each step you take - IT IS UNHEALTHY TO BE OBESE. PERIOD. THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS.

[a4a]

--"Just like a hair cut..... not dictated by the world but to what I am happy with on me"-- Ok then fair enough but why cant it then go bouth ways why cant it be what I am happy with on myself as well with out the put downs and genral ingorance?? I still stand by my idea that the media has brainwashed many women into fearing fat. And I wonder if I wasent a obese person makeing that statement if it would be excepted with out as much argurment in the 1st place..

 

well I don't think a person with a strong self esteem can be brainwashed by the media.

 

I have yet to fall victim to the medias American Idol thing, tattoos, latest trends...... I don't drink a beer because I think the ad is cool and that is what cool people do.

 

Instead of worrying about trying to convince others you are fat and happy..... just be fat and happy.

 

Everyone gets put down in some way..... I deal with it daily at work. Who cares..... I got nailed twice this week with the gender put down. I don't care I gave them a rather witty FU and stole their customers! :lmao:

[whichwayisup]

IE not every obese person is automatickly unhealthey just because they are larger that is a sterio type..

 

Eventually though, the weight does cause health issues. Diabetes, heart problems....Maybe not when you're younger, but as you age, it does.

[a4a]

Eventually though, the weight does cause health issues. Diabetes, heart problems....Maybe not when you're younger, but as you age, it does.

 

http://www.cdc.gov/nccdphp/dnpa/obesity/index.htm

 

being obese as a child can cause problems in adulthood as well.... not only physical issues but mental/emotional as well.