Dis Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 Yes, I guess we're kinda conditioned into expecting fireworks from the very beginning, while there's actually nothing wrong with feelings starting to grow very slowly (not that I have any feelings yet, but I caught myself thinking of about this guy with a tiny bit of tenderness haha). Oh nice to hear, but why the sick emoji ? :D The sick face is because, sadly, I'm afraid to catch feelings...and I'm starting to like him a bit. With all the disappointments I've experienced.. I know feelings can lead to hurt. But the point of dating is finding someone you like... so I'm going to have to take a risk As for your guy... Omggggg I hate when guys dont ask about me. I've ready all your posts and I've dated guys just like your guy It really doesnt matter if he's truly a nice guy or he's not. Niceness doesnt equate to not being self absorbed Theres plenty of nice people that only talk about themselves. Its more of a consideration, depth and thoughtfulness thing I dont know, I've had a lot of bad experiences with guys who never asked about me and I could never date one again. Imagine being in a RL with him??? Being around him allllll the time and the only reason why you're talking to each other is to talk about him???? I've done it before and its awfulllll!!!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted September 24, 2017 Author Share Posted September 24, 2017 The sick face is because, sadly, I'm afraid to catch feelings...and I'm starting to like him a bit. With all the disappointments I've experienced.. I know feelings can lead to hurt. But the point of dating is finding someone you like... so I'm going to have to take a risk As for your guy... Omggggg I hate when guys dont ask about me. I've ready all your posts and I've dated guys just like your guy It really doesnt matter if he's truly a nice guy or he's not. Niceness doesnt equate to not being self absorbed Theres plenty of nice people that only talk about themselves. Its more of a consideration, depth and thoughtfulness thing I dont know, I've had a lot of bad experiences with guys who never asked about me and I could never date one again. Imagine being in a RL with him??? Being around him allllll the time and the only reason why you're talking to each other is to talk about him???? I've done it before and its awfulllll!!!! I saw on your thread that you and that guy decided to be exclusive, that's wonderful! So happy for you and well, feeling something is still better than being a cynic who can't fall in love anymore, so you're truly alive as long as you can feel, even if it poses a risk to get heart broken. Hope it works out for you! With this guy, I'm about to put to it to rest, as my patience isn't endless. Today he also just wrote about himself, how he got sick, how he didn't sleep well and about his flight back. I asked him about his sickness, but then just added "my day was nice, thanks for asking :)". A bit passive aggressive, but I got really irritated. Even then he only sent back an emoji, and a few hours later wrote "ok well tell me about your day". Ugh don't feel like answering really.. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted September 24, 2017 Share Posted September 24, 2017 I'll remember this line for future bad texters. TBH I think he's selfish but the reason he annoys you so much is that you're just not that into him. Are you talking to other guys? I saw on your thread that you and that guy decided to be exclusive, that's wonderful! So happy for you and well, feeling something is still better than being a cynic who can't fall in love anymore, so you're truly alive as long as you can feel, even if it poses a risk to get heart broken. Hope it works out for you! With this guy, I'm about to put to it to rest, as my patience isn't endless. Today he also just wrote about himself, how he got sick, how he didn't sleep well and about his flight back. I asked him about his sickness, but then just added "my day was nice, thanks for asking :)". A bit passive aggressive, but I got really irritated. Even then he only sent back an emoji, and a few hours later wrote "ok well tell me about your day". Ugh don't feel like answering really.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted September 24, 2017 Author Share Posted September 24, 2017 I'll remember this line for future bad texters. TBH I think he's selfish but the reason he annoys you so much is that you're just not that into him. Are you talking to other guys? I was honestly starting to warm up to him and at some point felt some butterflies (sounds lame, but I'm one those who are able to feel each time I like someone), but then that thing with my songs happened and I noticed he doesn't try to get to know me in depth and that feeling dissipated. I'm not talking to anyone else... Had so little time this week to start new conversations and it's so tiresome to talk about the same shallow things over and over again :/ 2 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted September 24, 2017 Share Posted September 24, 2017 I was honestly starting to warm up to him and at some point felt some butterflies (sounds lame, but I'm one those who are able to feel each time I like someone), but then that thing with my songs happened and I noticed he doesn't try to get to know me in depth and that feeling dissipated. I'm not talking to anyone else... Had so little time this week to start new conversations and it's so tiresome to talk about the same shallow things over and over again :/ Yeah, I feel like when I'm on the verge of liking someone or not I'm like you - sometimes I feel something, then looking deeper - it is not there. I'm also like you regarding other guys- can't get myself to go on dates... Too much stuff to do at home&work, dating is mostly fake and shallow, and I'm actually scared to end up with a bf I'm meh about... Too old for that I feel like if I give up on the idea of having kids having A boyfriend becomes completely obsolete for me... I would love to have someone that I connect with emotionally&intellectually but this happens once in a blue moon........ 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted September 25, 2017 Share Posted September 25, 2017 I saw on your thread that you and that guy decided to be exclusive, that's wonderful! So happy for you and well, feeling something is still better than being a cynic who can't fall in love anymore, so you're truly alive as long as you can feel, even if it poses a risk to get heart broken. Hope it works out for you! With this guy, I'm about to put to it to rest, as my patience isn't endless. Today he also just wrote about himself, how he got sick, how he didn't sleep well and about his flight back. I asked him about his sickness, but then just added "my day was nice, thanks for asking :)". A bit passive aggressive, but I got really irritated. Even then he only sent back an emoji, and a few hours later wrote "ok well tell me about your day". Ugh don't feel like answering really.. Thanks girl Oh god... "Tell me about your day" That forced request being said from a guy who has rarely shown an interest in you from day 1... well its less than appealing I dont blame you for not wanting to respond... I wouldnt Lor, you're a catch and you can do much better than this. It gets really old dating someone who doesnt ask about you and and the rare times they do, you almost feel uncomfortable sharing because you know they dont care, they're just trying to save face I would tell him you dont wish to move forward and focus your precious energy on striking up a new convo with a guy who does ask about you This guy is a no go.. for sure 3 Link to post Share on other sites
1fish2fish Posted September 25, 2017 Share Posted September 25, 2017 That is my #1 turnoff when I meet someone new. Although my ex and I dated off and on for a year, to this day he doesn't know my favorite color, favorite kind of cake, or my middle name...because he never asked. On the flip side, I pretty much know everything about him because that was his favorite subject! Ugh. Never again! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted September 27, 2017 Author Share Posted September 27, 2017 Lol, after I wrote that "my day was good, thanks for asking" message, he immediately started asking me more questions. But he's not trying to book a date, so it's just pointless chit-chatting, besides I feel my interest has mainly dwindled. Might give one more date a go, but it's unlikely at this point that it will rekindle anything 2 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted September 27, 2017 Share Posted September 27, 2017 You guys both seem to have very low interest at each other, just high enough to trigger "What if" responses. Basically you're stringing each other along. Lol, after I wrote that "my day was good, thanks for asking" message, he immediately started asking me more questions. But he's not trying to book a date, so it's just pointless chit-chatting, besides I feel my interest has mainly dwindled. Might give one more date a go, but it's unlikely at this point that it will rekindle anything 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted September 27, 2017 Author Share Posted September 27, 2017 You guys both seem to have very low interest at each other, just high enough to trigger "What if" responses. Basically you're stringing each other along. My interest is definitely very low at the moment, but for him I think he might be extremely phlegmatic when it comes to dating. He's texting and even calling me a lot but it will probably not move forward If I don't start pushing. My friends agree that many men are like this here, they kinda take a very passive role to an extent. I need a guy who will push ME (probably a bit more of a choleric type). I'm calling it quits and gonna start being more active on OLD 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted September 27, 2017 Share Posted September 27, 2017 My interest is definitely very low at the moment, but for him I think he might be extremely phlegmatic when it comes to dating. He's texting and even calling me a lot but it will probably not move forward If I don't start pushing. My friends agree that many men are like this here, they kinda take a very passive role to an extent. I need a guy who will push ME (probably a bit more of a choleric type). I'm calling it quits and gonna start being more active on OLD My guess is he's feeling the low interest and most people reciprocate to low interest with respectively matching level. Even phlegmatic guys when excited go out of their comfort zone. But nothing to lose here - this guy was a dud and I bet money you've seen only the tip of the iceberg. Link to post Share on other sites
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