Appearing wealthy to attract dates.

[scratch]

Originally posted by Moose

Besides Scratch.....I'm at work 47.5 hours 5 days a week, the rest of the time at home in those blue jeans and shirt, driving the farm truck.....on Saturdays I'm usually at home doin' the yard thingy or garage thingy....on Sundays well......that's a no brainer.....it's rare we get to go out all flashy....use some horse sense dude.......

 

All right, I was going to let this go, but if you insist...

 

You rarely get to "go out flashy," as you so eloquently put it. Then, why a Durango and a Lincoln in addition to your fun cars and your utility car? Does that make sense to you?

 

From the little I can glean, you don't seem to possess excessive education or sophistication. If you're an autophile, that's cool. But it's another matter altogether from being wealthy, and it's entirely another matter altogether from being wealthy and discreet.

[HokeyReligions]

Quality and Class cannot be bought.

[Moose]

We're getting off topic here.....so I'll just say with 5 kids, the Durango is perfect....with my clients, the lincoln is perfect, with the horses, the PU is perfect, and my toys get me high, which is also........perrrrrfect......

From the little I can glean, you don't seem to possess excessive education or sophistication.

Yeah, you're right.....I admit it.....unlike the gold pile.....I had my woman long before I gained wealth......so really I can't offer him any help except he needs to be himself and learn that woman aren't conquests....

But it's another matter altogether from being wealthy, and it's entirely another matter altogether from being wealthy and discreet.

You really got a grasp on things don't ya? In case you can't tell, I don't care too much about whether you think I'm an, "autophile", or whether or not anyone believes I'm wealthy.......I could be flat broke and still be the richest man on Earth........gold mine should consider this before he puts up this front just for little marks on his bed's headboard........

Quality and Class cannot be bought.

Ain't that the truth......there's nothing worth gaining that doesn't take loads of hard work and determination, Quality and Class tops the list......

[UltimateZen]

Originally posted by centered

 

You know, this actually offended me. I know what you meant, and on one level I can agree with it. But that's a mighty broad brush you're using to tar all women with. Most of my friends wear jeans and Ts everyday, don't use makeup, wear flats, and often don't wear bras. The only times we *do* dress to the nines are for a special occasions, a boardroom presentation, or to have some fun with looking extra pretty.

 

 

 

I can't help with you being offended....sometimes the truth can be unsettling no matter what level you agree with it on. I have yet to read an arguement on this post that can prove that women DON'T lie just as much as men when playing the courtship game. Guys need to rely on their ability to show the female that they can support them and women must attract men through their looks. It is hard to believe that you (I assume you are female) or any woman does not have some sort of makeup in her purse..either it be lipstick, eyeshadow, whatever. The point is that women lie just as much as men in the courting game. Their lies are non-verbal....men just lie verbally.

[Rosalind]

Originally posted by Gold Pile

Sooner or later they'll find I'm a cheap skate, but we would have had some fun by then, no harm done.

Sounds like a idiot plan IMO...and also CRUEL, you just can't go around f*cking with womens hearts and heads like that.

 

"no harm done" - bullcrap to that.

[Stone]

I don't know what the big stigma is with ladies who like 'wealthy" men so what.

 

Some ladies only date a certian race, a certian height, a certian age what is the difference?

[crazy_grl]

Originally posted by UltimateZen

I can't help with you being offended....sometimes the truth can be unsettling no matter what level you agree with it on. I have yet to read an arguement on this post that can prove that women DON'T lie just as much as men when playing the courtship game. Guys need to rely on their ability to show the female that they can support them and women must attract men through their looks. It is hard to believe that you (I assume you are female) or any woman does not have some sort of makeup in her purse..either it be lipstick, eyeshadow, whatever. The point is that women lie just as much as men in the courting game. Their lies are non-verbal....men just lie verbally.

 

Your analogy is flawed in that saying that wearing make-up is lying would mean that wearing clothes, dying ones hair (which both men and women do), or even wearing deodorant and perfume/cologne is lying. After all, you don't really smell like that naturally, and you're covering up your body by wearing clothes. That's not what you really look like.

 

I agree with you that both trying to impress with looks and money are similar, and wearing make-up could be compared to dressing nice or having a nice car to appear more well-off than in reality. But the degree that GoldPile is talking about, where he actually goes out of his way to put up totally false pretenses is not on the same scale as someone wearing make-up.

 

Putting up a facade of wealth in order to snare a mate would be more equivalent to trying to pass off a complete mask as your real face or passing off a picture of someone else as yourself to someone online.

 

And I completely disagree with you that it's a fact that women look for men who are wealthy and can provide. That statement is simply idiotic, and so is that men look for women who are very good looking and can eventually mother a family. I doubt you've met every person on this planet and asked them this question nor has anyone, so you show your own ignorance by claiming it as a fact.

 

Anyway, you make an interesting point. You've just exaggerated what you'd label as women's 'negatives' and down played those you attribute to men. You've also neglected that both sexes do a bit of each.

[gold pile]

Originally posted by SoleMate

I can answer your question, Gold Pile, but first I need a little background...as in, why is this a goal? You prefer your women shallow and superficial? You want to make sure they dump you when they really get to know you? You want to see how little you can spend on a date?

 

Not ready to settle down again. Would like to have fun...nothing long term. So in the short term these ladies will do just fine. It's not like I'm romancing and breaking hearts.

[gold pile]

Originally posted by lindya

Well, it depends what category of gold-digger you're looking for. The "no gold chains please" comment indicates that you see yourself as a subtle, classy guy...so I'm guessing that you will want female sidekicks who fit in with that image. This rules out your common or garden gold-diggers who's looking for nothing more than a big wad of ready cash for a series of wild nights out and a porsche cabriolet that - much like her - won't be repossessed until the end of the summer

 

A professional gold-digger with looks, style and the smarts is probably more your sort. The problem is that you will probably not be hers...particularly when she realises (ie after 3.5 seconds) that you're faking it. Still, you can but try.

 

Buy an expensive pair of shoes and a couple of high quality cashmere sweaters. Cultivate a gracious manner and strangulate your vowels. Send yourself mail, open it in front of women (hiding the stamp) and make subtle, casual comments indicating that it's got something to do with a Swiss bank account. Pay close attention to share prices. Note any dramatic risers, then pretend you own a large holding in that particular company. Read F Scott Fitzgerald if you're American, and Nancy Mitford if you're not.

 

LOL and good advice. I'm American, USA

[Gold pile]

Originally posted by scratch

So what if it is? It's still an interesting question, and something I'm sure you have considered at some point in your life.

 

If the mods delete it again, I'll start a new thread keeping the question hypothetical.

 

Thanks Scratch. I feel this is a legitimate tactic used before. This thread is educational for men as well as women who wouldn't want to fall for this type of common ploy.

[gold pile]

Originally posted by Outcast

I don't think it's a real post. I don't think he's rich at all. I think he's some regular joe who thinks he can pull a fast one for his own amusement. Sure sign? BMWs and Mercedes are ok but not the high-end prestige cars they used to be. If he was talking Jag or Ferrari, he might be what he claims to be.

 

Agreed. I'm well off, not rich. I can afford those 2 cars...I'm shopping around now. I can't very well afford the others mentioned. Those are facts as to what I have to work with.

[gold pile]

Originally posted by Rosalind

Sounds like a idiot plan IMO...and also CRUEL, you just can't go around f*cking with womens hearts and heads like that.

 

"no harm done" - bullcrap to that.

Gold diggers! not jusy any women. Gold diggers on the prowl with their heads and pocketbooks, not searching with their hearts.

 

No breaking hearts here. Exploratory dates: she's still evaluating me, not falling in love.

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

Did anyone see on one of those entertainment shows they asked Trump's fiance if she would be marrying him if he wasn't rich? She replied with, Would he be marrying me if I wasn't beautiful?

[alphamale]

Originally posted by HokeyReligions

Quality and Class cannot be bought.

correct HOKEY....it is due to your upbringing. the rich are different and raised differently than most others. we've all heard of the trailer trash hoochie mama who won the lotto and is now a millionaire, well...she's just a rich trailer trash hoochie mama now.

[lindya]

Originally posted by MWC_LifeBeginsAt40

Did anyone see on one of those entertainment shows they asked Trump's fiance if she would be marrying him if he wasn't rich? She replied with, Would he be marrying me if I wasn't beautiful?

 

Yes, that coupling dispels the theory that opposites attract as she both looks and talks like a younger, prettier, female version of le Trump himself. A useful pointer, perhaps, to any would-be gold diggers out there - though it probably doesn't help the original poster in his quest to meet them.

[UltimateZen]

Originally posted by crazy_grl

 

 

Your analogy is flawed in that saying that wearing make-up is lying would mean that wearing clothes, dying ones hair (which both men and women do), or even wearing deodorant and perfume/cologne is lying. After all, you don't really smell like that naturally, and you're covering up your body by wearing clothes. That's not what you really look like.

 

My arguement is balancing out the fact that what this guy is trying to do is no better than what women do. Men depend on wealth, health, and being able to support a significant mate. I doubt very much you consider a homeless man an equal catch to a man driving in a RR. So in order for men to stand out to catch the eyes of women, he must look and act the part of a wealthy provider, if he already isn't one; which is in this case.

 

Women need to stand out as well from the other women in the crowd so that they can be noticed; whether it be for attracting a mate, catching the attention at a conference presentation, or to boost her self confidence; the point is that the way women put on false faces to make them look prettier (when they may not be. Lie.), higher heels to make them look taller (when they are shorter than they are. Lie.), or wear bras to excentuate their breasts (when their breasts are not as big. Lie).

 

My arguement is based that Women lie just as much as men, just in different ways.

 

I agree with you that both trying to impress with looks and money are similar, and wearing make-up could be compared to dressing nice or having a nice car to appear more well-off than in reality. But the degree that GoldPile is talking about, where he actually goes out of his way to put up totally false pretenses is not on the same scale as someone wearing make-up.

 

How can you say that Women are not putting up "False pretenses" when they cover themselves to look different than who they really are?

 

Putting up a facade of wealth in order to snare a mate would be more equivalent to trying to pass off a complete mask as your real face or passing off a picture of someone else as yourself to someone online.

 

The fact is that men and women lie every day in the courtship ritual.

 

And I completely disagree with you that it's a fact that women look for men who are wealthy and can provide. That statement is simply idiotic, and so is that men look for women who are very good looking and can eventually mother a family. I doubt you've met every person on this planet and asked them this question nor has anyone, so you show your own ignorance by claiming it as a fact.

 

 

I very much doubt that you would be happy living in a trailer over a house. YOur ignorance lies in the fact that you believe that bringing up future children or living with your spouse in a poor environment is something you desire.

[Outcast]

And I completely disagree with you that it's a fact that women look for men who are wealthy and can provide. That statement is simply idiotic, and so is that men look for women who are very good looking and can eventually mother a family. I doubt you've met every person on this planet and asked them this question nor has anyone, so you show your own ignorance by claiming it as a fact.

 

Unfortunately, tired old myths are used by people who claim to 'really understand what relationships are all about' but who can't be bothered with fact. Then they claim that it is fact. Then again, if you're intellectually lazy, it's SO much easier to just parrot the same old sameold. The upside is that as soon as you hear someone rattling off one of these myths, you can dismiss that person as not bright enough to be interesting to you and not have to waste your time getting to know them better.

 

Agreed. I'm well off, not rich. I can afford those 2 cars...I'm shopping around now. I can't very well afford the others mentioned. Those are facts as to what I have to work with.

 

Then you better look for the bronze-diggers or the silver-diggers because you're not in the league the gold-diggers are after.

[Stone]

 

Then you better look for the bronze-diggers or the silver-diggers because you're not in the league the gold-diggers are after.

 

[gold pile]

Originally posted by Outcast

Then you better look for the bronze-diggers or the silver-diggers because you're not in the league the gold-diggers are after.

As many have pointed out, many wealthy folks drive modest cars. So a Mercedes or BMW could certainly be the ride of choice for the filthy rich.

 

A guy in a beat, rusty, older car (From here on known as an Outcast mobile) would have a much harder time selling himself as rich, than a BMW driver.

[Outcast]

Nah. Go for your nondescript American sedan.

[lindya]

A guy in a beat, rusty, older car (From here on known as an Outcast mobile) would have a much harder time selling himself as rich, than a BMW driver.

 

BMWs? Oh no. Not an ounce of soul. All they tell me is that the person's on a high enough salary to meet the monthly car payments and is a bit lacking in imagination and originality. I know a couple of people who drive them, and they're nice enough people...but materialistic, status conscious and somewhat tedious, it must be said.

 

As for beat up rusty old buckets...love the people who drive them, hate the cars themselves because they have a horrible habit of breaking down out of mobile phone range in the middle of a snowstorm. I associate them with students or people who live out in the country and drive up and down a bumpy old dust-track every day. I'd go for the guy in the beat-up old rust bucket every time. I like the laid back attitude of people who live in the country, and I'm generally charmed by people who carry on loving things after they get old and knackered.

[A Fly onThe Wall]

Originally posted by gold pile

As many have pointed out, many wealthy folks drive modest cars. So a Mercedes or BMW could certainly be the ride of choice for the filthy rich.

 

A guy in a beat, rusty, older car (From here on known as an Outcast mobile) would have a much harder time selling himself as rich, than a BMW driver.

 

 

 

Oh these statements are oh so wrong

 

While it is true that some wealthy people might drive a bmw or merc but most do not.. Those are statement cars and the truly rich do not try to make statements.

 

The truly rich may own a lambo or exotic expensive car but they almost never drive them.. they just keep them in the 10 car garage.. They don't need to show their wealth so they don't drive 'em.

 

Jay Leno for example drives either an suv or motorcycle to work everyday even though he owns hundreds of cars worth millions

 

some of the richest people I know drive 20k-35k suvs or normal cars

 

Gold Pile.. You need to go out and meet some rich people instead of trying to think what they are like you need to experience it.

[lindya]

Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall

Oh these statements are oh so wrong

 

While it is true that some wealthy people might drive a bmw or merc but most do not.. Those are statement cars and the truly rich do not try to make statements.

 

I'm not sure I completely agree with you there, Fly. The accumulation of vast amounts of wealth doesn't always drive away egotism and the desire to flaunt. There are people who really don't care about material possessions, but who place great value on being well read and travelled - or being talented in a way that brings enjoyment to others (eg good cook, writer, musician, gardener or artist). Some of those people may well achieve moderate or great wealth through their talent, others won't. The chances are, however, that that sort of person will always prioritise talent and knowledge over wealth - whatever their financial status.

 

Equally you may find an entrepreneur who had humble beginnings, but was always desperate to do well materially and impress others with his possessions. He too may be talented - but in a way that enables him to exploit his environment, and doesn't necessarily make the world a lovelier place to live in. If his primary love and motivation is money, then the chances are that however rich he gets he will carry on wanting to make statements about how wealthy he is.

 

Sure, once he starts mixing with other wealthy people some of the "I just want to dress like an Ordinary Jo" mentality might rub off on him. He might feel under pressure to show a bit more class and discretion. He might start hiding some of his wealth so that others don't try to steal from him (or so that shareholders in his company - once it goes public - don't kick up a storm about how much of a bonus he awards himself) but I doubt he ever completely loses the desire to impress others with his wealth. Particularly if he doesn't have any particularly impressive personal qualities other than his money-making talent. I think it's a character trait rather than a wealth-influenced variable.

[gold pile]

The town next to mine is known for it's well off residents. The zoning board restricts most development, they vitually prohibit rental apartments, Houses must meet a certain massive minimum square footage, the police scrutinize people who don't fit the towns demographic.

 

Plenty of BMW and mercedes there.

 

Let me tell you how I became well off. Living beneath my means. No credit card debt (that's the biggest poverty maker out there). Reasonable vacations...not extravagant, buying a modest house, Buying most of my food at supermarket (less at quickie marts, and resturants), Buying modest cars, prudent investing, etc

 

I know many people with flashy cars, big houses, $10 K annual vacations. They haven't saved a dime for retirement and are in debt big time.

 

With all their flash, many assume they're wealthy, I could buy and sell them, but I don't look the part.

 

My point (finally) is that I know (as do many here) that a Mercedes driver might be cash poor. But I encounter people all the time that think those drivers are rich.

 

Some Gold diggers, as with the rest of the population, will consider that driver rich. Some will see through an act right away.

 

" My Rolls is in the shop, got a flat tire at the polo grounds, this BMW is just my winter-beater"

[A Fly onThe Wall]

Originally posted by gold pile

The town next to mine is known for it's well off residents. The zoning board restricts most development, they vitually prohibit rental apartments, Houses must meet a certain massive minimum square footage, the police scrutinize people who don't fit the towns demographic.

 

Plenty of BMW and mercedes there.

 

I know many people with flashy cars, big houses, $10 K annual vacations. They haven't saved a dime for retirement and are in debt big time.

 

With all their flash, many assume they're wealthy, I could buy and sell them, but I don't look the part.

 

these 2 statements contradict each other if you are using the idea that town next to you is where the rich people are,

 

That is why their bmws and mercs don't mean wealth

 

and the bmws and mercs could very well be for their children ...