Throwing in the Towel

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

It doesn't matter though.

 

Somewhere out there, there is a woman who cannot attract men.

 

I know for a fact there are some (though the raw percentages might be much less).

 

Life is finite. You can do with the time what you wish.

 

Good luck to you.

 

I agree with you, but I assume the women out there that can't attract men, pale in comparison to the number of men, or maybe they are less vocal about it, more quiet about it than men are, if that is the case then that wouldn't surprise me.

 

 

Men with girlfriends are viewed differently by people, society, than women with boyfriends. It's like if a guy is great, amazing with women, he is seen as a real respected man, men are judged by their success with women more so than women are judged by their success with men.

[MGX]

These sort of posts pop up periodically. A harsh analogy but they are akin to people who talk all the time about committing suicide.

 

Only the people you never suspect end up doing it.

 

These posts are in the same category for me as the 'Hey struggling guys, you suck with women because of this' type of posts.

 

Both open usually with no intention other than to generate discussion out of the OPs boredom.

 

Someone who really throws in the towel just does it, they don't make a discussion topic about it.

 

Kind of like the suicide analogy someone else made here.

 

That "cry for help" scenario CAN be the case, but not all of the time. Some people have already quit women and just want someone to talk to if they have similar feelings and experiences. It really isn't a typical discussion to have.

 

TBH I didnt create this thread to attract attention or have someone convince me otherwise. I just wanted to share my thoughts and I was curious if there is anyone else who has foregone dating? I dont even think priests do it anymore.

 

I've stopped trying to look for women for almost a year. Got tired of the various games that women tend to play, so I said the hell with it -- I'm done. I replaced trying to find a relationship with new goals that are actually obtainable.

 

I come to loveshack for the entertainment -- when some of my other interest/hobbist forums are slow or lack news.

 

Regarding the OP poster, you have my sympathies because I have an acute understanding of how you feel because I am in in the same situation myself.

 

If it makes anyone feel better I am 5.9, slim, athletic and still useless at dating so this is by no means an "ugly" problem though the jury is still out on my face.

 

I think dating and friends are inextricably linked, the greater ones social circle the higher probability of finding date.

 

Sometimes your attractiveness isn't the problem. You might be so average that you're invisible to women. You might always be the 7th or 8th choice.

 

Perhaps it's frowned upon by society precisely because relationships generally entail an exchange of resources/services; in other words, it's a competing service offered in the market. The union workers hate the 'scabs' because the 'scabs' are willing to do the union workers' job at a lower price?

 

Diseases are another reason. You don't know where those women have been. And prostitutes aren't exactly known for their passion. So things that you can't do, you might as well not use their services at all.

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

Even if you throw in the towel, sadly the desire to want to have sex or be loved by a woman other than your mom, aunt, or sister, does not go away

[johndoe2]

Diseases are another reason. You don't know where those women have been. And prostitutes aren't exactly known for their passion. So things that you can't do, you might as well not use their services at all.

Well, they're more passionate than your hand at least. As for diseases, condoms help. As with everything, cost-benefit analysis, and weighing the alternative. If the alternative is just plain celibacy and a perennially lonely existence, doesn't seem like you have much to lose anyway, so why not.

 

Even if you throw in the towel, sadly the desire to want to have sex or be loved by a woman other than your mom, aunt, or sister, does not go away

If only they made a drug that could suppress such desires, if only.

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

Well, they're more passionate than your hand at least. As for diseases, condoms help. As with everything, cost-benefit analysis, and weighing the alternative. If the alternative is just plain celibacy and a perennially lonely existence, doesn't seem like you have much to lose anyway, so why not.

 

 

If only they made a drug that could suppress such desires, if only.

 

exactly, I wish I had an emotion-chip I could turn on and off like Data from Star Trek the Next Generation.

[Renton]

exactly, I wish I had an emotion-chip I could turn on and off like Data from Star Trek the Next Generation.

 

My biggest problem is i think that i developed one over the years and now its switched off all the time

[MGX]

My biggest problem is i think that i developed one over the years and now its switched off all the time

 

It happens. You get conditioned not to care anymore. It's probably how priests and monks handle it.

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

well sperm is cheap, eggs are expensive, they say men are the more disposable sex

[I_Squared_R]

So since my original post - nothing has changed. Life is the same just that I have come to terms with my lack of success with women being out of my control.

 

I just wanted to say how I am so disgusted with hearing everyone elses relationship problems. It's fascinating to see how my friends are easily capable of attracting women, but they destroy it, create their own problems, and become depressed over it. Im &*$@ing tired of hearing about people wanting to kill themselves because of some dumb broad. I understand that about 95% of people I know have some sort of mental disorder.

 

For those people still looking to meet your "significant other" - good luck. Buy a rolex, hold a stack of money and take an instagram picture for the women to properly select you. Your other choice is to go to the top plastic surgeon and get that body that you always needed to impress the disgusting animals that society has raised.

 

:laugh::lmao:

 

Oh yeah I been ripping on everyone. I am too vocal and you know what? I &$*@ing love speaking my mind. Here's a story about some broad I know. She figured out how to use make up and instagram filters to make herself appear beautiful. Now she is speaking down about people on facebook and posting videos with captions "Pretty people only". Holy #!&! the bitch found lipstick! I slept with her last year and now she is full of herself because she made the right connections. She publicly spoke about a famous person wanting to take her out but she said she was upset because he is "ugliest in the business". It's one thing to talk about that with your friends, but to speak about it on Facebook??.. Well I spoke my mind to her, to say the least!

Edited June 15, 2015 by I_Squared_R

[No Limit]

Your friends might not have disorders, but most people's problems are created by their own perception. They are unable to fully realize the action - reaction system. "It's all in your head" basically.

 

As for people turning arrogant - tell me about that one. A friend of mine I had a minor crush on sadly became inspired about how I basically turned from ugly duckling to pretty duckling in a matter of weeks once I got into their class - and has been hoarding female interest ever since. My interest in him was quickly killed off when he made snide comments about why I and a few others were single and that I should just get together with the other guy in our friend circle which frankly annoyed us both. It's kind of a double-moral-problem because I guess I should be happy that he's more confident now, but I can't help but feel sad that a 'nice guy' type was lost.

 

Oh well, I'm staying away from relationships for a reason.

[elaine567]

men are judged by their success with women more so than women are judged by their success with men.

 

Go try being a woman without a man and see you unjudged you feel...

[elaine567]

So since my original post - nothing has changed. Life is the same just that I have come to terms with my lack of success with women being out of my control.

 

I just wanted to say how I am so disgusted with hearing everyone elses relationship problems. It's fascinating to see how my friends are easily capable of attracting women, but they destroy it, create their own problems, and become depressed over it. Im &*$@ing tired of hearing about people wanting to kill themselves because of some dumb broad. I understand that about 95% of people I know have some sort of mental disorder.

 

For those people still looking to meet your "significant other" - good luck. Buy a rolex, hold a stack of money and take an instagram picture for the women to properly select you. Your other choice is to go to the top plastic surgeon and get that body that you always needed to impress the disgusting animals that society has raised.

 

:laugh::lmao:

 

Oh yeah I been ripping on everyone. I am too vocal and you know what? I &$*@ing love speaking my mind. Here's a story about some broad I know. She figured out how to use make up and instagram filters to make herself appear beautiful. Now she is speaking down about people on facebook and posting videos with captions "Pretty people only". Holy #!&! the bitch found lipstick! I slept with her last year and now she is full of herself because she made the right connections. She publicly spoke about a famous person wanting to take her out but she said she was upset because he is "ugliest in the business". It's one thing to talk about that with your friends, but to speak about it on Facebook??.. Well I spoke my mind to her, to say the least!

 

I rest my case.

[No Limit]

Go try being a woman without a man and see you unjudged you feel...

 

Huh, indeed. If you're single with 30 or don't want kids everyone believes there's something wrong with you.

[salparadise]

Go try being a woman without a man and see you unjudged you feel...

 

It must be terribly disconcerting to have to choose between being judged for not having a man, and having to accept one that is not a top five percenter. Y'all have our deepest sympathies.

[Justanaverageguy]

Oh well, I'm staying away from relationships for a reason.

 

Huh, indeed. If you're single with 30 or don't want kids everyone believes there's something wrong with you.

 

That entirely depends on "why" you are single. Is it because you actually prefer to be alone - or is it because you would actually like to be with someone but have basically given up trying to find someone of quality because of past experiences and the fact it is just easier and safer to be single ?

 

If it is the former then good on you for living the life you actually want regardless of what people say.

 

If it is the later then its terribly sad ..... sometimes in life you have to break some eggs to make an omelette

[I_Squared_R]

I rest my case.

 

I don't think anyone understands your "case" in argument or did you create any conclusion from my previous post. People are a culmination of their environment and my case is no different. Nobody pokes a lion and expects not to get attacked. I have an aggressive approach to morality - if you act immorally and intentionally hurt other people then I will bite back even harder. This is my approach and has always been. My previous use of vulgar language was to emphasize the actions of the people I spoke about.

 

I'd like to share with you an example of my personality.

One time I was at a house party in a neighborhood I didn't know. A guy there approached a women I was with very aggressively and tried to take her away from the party. She was clearly very intoxicated so I rescued her from the guy. (She did thank me later). Later that night the same guy approached me and asked to talk to me. He put a gun to my stomach and threatened me...

 

I grabbed the gun. Pulled it closer to my stomach and told him "Whatre you waiting for #!&$^?" While other people tried to defuse the situation.

 

I am disgusted with people. If I see someone slandering another person publicly then in a sense I will "grab the gun" and call you a broad. I do hope to influence people to think differently and if I am loathed for that - so be it. At least the people I protect/support will appreciate it.

 

Your post didn't rest any case. It only raised more questions.

 

Like, why are people so silent to the injustice that surrounds them?

Many great men like Martin Luther King, and others stood in front of in-adversity. They sacrificed everything to create a better world. Yet no one here will speak out about the way society has become.

 

SILENCE

 

and immorality is killing everyone.

 

What a joke.

 

And that girl I talked about is a broad. Where's your case at?

Edited June 15, 2015 by I_Squared_R

[Justanaverageguy]

I'd like to share with you an example of my personality.

 

So your approach is to try and out lion the lion or out bark the dog. That only gets you a very limited way until you encounter a lion that bights much harder then you do. I mean you say you pushed a guys gun into your stomach and encouraged him to shoot like it is a major achievement. If he shot you - you would be likely dead.

 

I try to take a polar 180* approach (not always perfect). Be direct but friendly. I've also learnt to be good at reading people. Sometimes direct action is required but more often then not it can be easily headed off before it happens in a non threatening way.

 

I'll give you an example. Quite recently I encountered probably the angriest / rudest man I have ever met in my life. You could literally feel the angry energy he was eminating. He was a Eastern European guy traveling with his wife and daughter. we were on a day tour boat in Turkey. The boat was crowded and he was pushing past people and demanded they move so he could get pictures of his family where he wanted.

 

He ended up coming over to where my partner and I were sitting and sat his family in a tiny sliver of space and then demanded we move out of the way so he could take photos. We moved down and he demanded we move down further. We started giggling because he was so rude and direct. He was clearly looking for a confrontation so I simply "disarmed" him. I stood up and voluntarily offered him our seats then asked if he would like me to take a picture of him and his wife and child. He didn't know what to do. He was so dead keen on a fight and so clearly trying to start one with someone. I took the photo with a beeming smile told him it was beautiful and people around us started laughing at him. He got angry and stormed off with his wife and child.

 

Later on he did end up in a fight with two passengers who confronted him for his rude behaviour. He punched one in the face and spat directly in the face of the other. They were all removed from the boat by security. When we got off the boat they were still brawling outside on the dock with his wife and child watching on

Edited June 15, 2015 by Justanaverageguy

[I_Squared_R]

So your approach is to try and out lion the lion or out bark the dog. That only gets you a very limited way until you encounter a lion that bights much harder then you do. I mean you say you pushed a guys gun into your stomach and encouraged him to shoot like it is a major achievement. If he shot you - you would be likely dead.

 

I try to take a polar 180* approach (not always perfect). Be direct but friendly. I've also learnt to be good at reading people. Sometimes direct action is required but more often then not it can be easily headed off before it happens in a non threatening way.

 

I'll give you an example. Quite recently I encountered probably the angriest / rudest man I have ever met in my life. You could literally feel the angry energy he was eminating. He was a Eastern European guy traveling with his wife and daughter. we were on a day tour boat in Turkey. The boat was crowded and he was pushing past people and demanded they move so he could get pictures of his family where he wanted.

 

He ended up coming over to where my partner and I were sitting and sat his family in a tiny sliver of space and then demanded we move out of the way so he could take photos. We moved down and he demanded we move down further. We started giggling because he was so rude and direct. He was clearly looking for a confrontation so I simply "disarmed" him. I stood up and voluntarily offered him our seats then asked if he would like me to take a picture of him and his wife and child. He didn't know what to do. He was so dead keen on a fight and so clearly trying to start one with someone. I took the photo with a beeming smile told him it was beautiful and people around us started laughing at him. He got angry and stormed off with his wife and child.

 

Later on he did end up in a fight with two passengers who confronted him for his rude behaviour. He punched one in the face and spat directly in the face of the other. They were all removed from the boat by security. When we got off the boat they were still brawling outside on the dock with his wife and child watching on

 

Some people fear the lion. Others, like myself, don't fear anyone or anything. You miss the point. It doesn't matter how large or how hard the lion fight bites back. You stand for what is right. Period.

 

This man could've easily been run over by the tank.

 

 

and actually I am wittier than you think. I noticed that the hand gun was a 9mm variant. He had it aimed at my stomach, when I grabbed it I directed it towards my kidney. Less fatal if it were real. I had a burning suspicion that it were fake and it sure was! The slide was plastic. I started laughing while everyone else onlooking thought I was absolutely insane. Maybe I am.

Edited June 15, 2015 by I_Squared_R

[Justanaverageguy]

Some people fear the lion. Others, like myself, don't fear anyone or anything. You miss the point. It doesn't matter how large or how hard the lion fight bites back. You stand for what is right. Period.

 

This man could've easily been run over by the tank.

 

 

and actually I am wittier than you think. I noticed that the hand gun was a 9mm variant. He had it aimed at my stomach, when I grabbed it I directed it towards my kidney. Less fatal if it were real. I had a burning suspicion that it were fake and it sure was! The slide was plastic. I started laughing while everyone else onlooking thought I was absolutely insane. Maybe I am.

It is not about fear. It is about the type of action you take. He didn't fight the tank did he. He didn't drive another tank into battle against them. He didn't throw rocks, he didn't fire a gun. Nor did he encourage them to fire theirs at him. It was a peaceful protest. If this man had followed your philosophy on life he simply would have driven into a war with a larger number of tanks. Do you not see the stupidity in that ?

 

To fight fire with fire is to bang your head against a wall.

Can't you see the flames grow higher ? Once tiny embers now burn tall.

 

I believe in leading by example rather then copying the actions of those you oppose. Be the change you want to see

Edited June 15, 2015 by Justanaverageguy

[No Limit]

That entirely depends on "why" you are single. Is it because you actually prefer to be alone - or is it because you would actually like to be with someone but have basically given up trying to find someone of quality because of past experiences and the fact it is just easier and safer to be single ?

 

If it is the former then good on you for living the life you actually want regardless of what people say.

 

If it is the later then its terribly sad ..... sometimes in life you have to break some eggs to make an omelette

 

At first it was the latter. The more I found out about relationships, the more it developed into the former.

[Justanaverageguy]

At first it was the latter. The more I found out about relationships, the more it developed into the former.

 

Haha well it sounds to me like maybe more caused by the later then and the former. Maybe the later is just an easy excuse to avoid meeting the next toad

 

But the thing is every toad brings you closer to the next prince charming. Why not take a chance on another frog and see what happens when you give him a kiss ?

[No Limit]

Haha well it sounds to me like maybe more caused by the later then and the former. Maybe the later is just an easy excuse to avoid meeting the next toad

 

But the thing is every toad brings you closer to the next prince charming. Why not take a chance on another frog and see what happens when you give him a kiss ?

 

Nah, nice guys seem to turn into a*sholes quite easily when you give them too much attention. Perhaps it's just an age thing in my case though, I'll just rest that stuff for the next 5 years and focus on my career instead.

[Justanaverageguy]

Nah, nice guys seem to turn into a*sholes quite easily when you give them too much attention. Perhaps it's just an age thing in my case though, I'll just rest that stuff for the next 5 years and focus on my career instead.

 

Probably not a bad idea anyway. I tend to find when you focus on finding Mr or Mrs right they never show up. As soon as you stop looking they seem to just magically appear.

[No Limit]

Probably not a bad idea anyway. I tend to find when you focus on finding Mr or Mrs right they never show up. As soon as you stop looking they seem to just magically appear.

 

Which is why I think it would be a good idea for OP too. You can't force anything and if you focus too much on this without having results to show for it it's only natural to become frustrated.

[No Limit]

they have to try something else don't they when they aren't getting anything but the run around

 

Sure, but then they shouldn't complain when old friends turn their backs on them because not everyone is spineless enough to tolerate repeated disrespect, intended or not. When his GF broke up with him, should I have just gone over to him and say "What's wrong with you, not even able to keep a girl tough guy? Loser!" because we're "such great pals who are always honest with each other"?

 

But I do agree that at least he got female interest; so OP, let it be said to you by a person who helped a buddy get through that transformation - be an ass, and the ladyworld will greet you with open arms.