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struggling, missing her so much


xinaxxsdertf

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xinaxxsdertf

tell me bout it...

 

even now, im bloody missing my ex. didnt receive a text today, kind of hoped i was getting one...

 

i dont know how to stop missing her

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Mate, you don't stop missing her it will just happen over time, I'm 2 months down the line and I still miss her, you won't just stop as hard as it is, you won't just stop, you can't just switch your feelings off.

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xinaxxsdertf

Then how the heck do they manage to keep away from us. Im sure the first chance we got, we would be back with them again. But the other way round they probably decline us. Have to admit though life is so much easier without my ex around. But in saying that, life was also so much better being able to share it with your other half. Theres so many things about them that you miss once they are gone..

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Because they somehow can switch off there feelings...I know mate i...there's pros and cons to being single and in a relationship,

 

On a better note took a first step today met a gorgeous girl and asked her out on a date God it felt good to be back in the game haha

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xinaxxsdertf

thats good to hear bro!! i think even asking people out and going to have fun, even if it doesnt work. will still help you move on. thats what i need. its not the fact of trying to find a partner but opening your eyes to the rest of the world to see there are plenty more options out there that are even better than our ex's

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Ooo yeah exactly mate that's what I plan on doing going out meeting people and having fun, I'm not looking for anything, cause I know at the minute I'm not ready for that, but Yrh time to get back out there and back in the game did wonders for confidence.

 

How you doing today bro

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xinaxxsdertf

not too good bro. one of those bad days. Just woke up like an hour or so ago its now 9.30am

 

dont have any work today and im missing her this morning. wish i could see her. and she told me monday she loves and misses me but yet didnt text me at all yesterday. wtf is up with that. i wish i just knew what was going on in her head. i feel like she really doesnt deserve me, she doesnt deserve this struggle im going through either but i just cant stop thinking about her.

 

and im pretty broke now so the next few weeks are just going to be working and training, wont be really doing much else.

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Ahhh mate...have you said to asked her if she wants to sort things out since she said those things to you cause I would... And if she says she doesn't id block her number mate cause it's un fair if she continues to say these things but doesn't want anything really it's horrible and just trying to keep you hooked and she doesn't deserve you.

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xinaxxsdertf

Yeah if she reaches out again then i might say something, but if she doesnt then oh well. i'll tell her you cant keep saying you love and miss me but still not want to be with me, so either do something about it or leave me alone.

 

I deserve so much better but shes got this massive hold on me, shes just perfect to me.. idk what is wrong with me.

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She's only got it on you cause it's so early after the break up pal, you go no contact and stick to it it will get better and better until you realise that she doesn't have anything on you and you deserve better mate

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xinaxxsdertf

Yeah the thing was, is I was doing so much better. I was missing her but still moving on with my life and having good days. Now ever since i saw her 4 days ago, shes all I can think about. I tried to convince myself I didnt miss her but now I cant get her out of my head.

 

I screwed myself over by letting her come over the other day, because now she got her little moment with me that she needed and shes gone again. Hasnt texted me in 2 days and im the one stuck here feeling like im back at square one again. this is day 3 NC, hardest day yet..

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xinaxxsdertf

funny she texted me today saying she loves me and misses me. i replied and asked why she keeps doing it, she said because she means it.

 

So i said i cant be your friend, you either have to be my gf or dont be with me at all and just leave me alone so i can move on. you cant keep saying you love me when im trying to get over you.

 

then she didnt reply.. wow. so in other words, 'yeah all i wanted was a friend, but ok bye then!'.

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Well mate, you did the exact right thing then, you told her your terms she was over stepping the mark, and so she left it and didn't reply, now you have to completely leave it mate, I would be willing to bet she will message you again when she gets abit lonely mate but she didn't reply when it matters so that's all it is she's abit lonely so wants a fix....you may be better off blocking her number mate. But that's it now complete nc move on with your life you'll be so much better pal.

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xinaxxsdertf

I did leave it man but she ended up replying saying she always texts me to let me know she loves me and i never reply.

 

i just told her that it wasnt fair because im trying to get over her and then she said she cant get over me. i told her 'you know how i feel about you, you know where i live so do what you want'. she texted something back and i didnt reply. And then she texted me an hour later and asked to see me tomorrow, she said she misses me and wants to tell me how she feels in person. i said okay.

 

i already see where this is going. she is leaving the city tomorrow afternoon and wont be back till the end of the week. i told her she can see me when she gets back but she wants to see me before she leaves. What do i do and how do i do it? because i love her so much and most definitely want to see her tomorrow but i just know that she doesnt deserve me after leaving me twice but i cant let go, i just want to see her. The scariest part for me is that she is far too close to my heart that she can break it whenever she likes. im sure you know how i feel charlie. its scary as heck! its like i'll do anything for her even if it puts me at risk of being broken again.. why cant i look out for myself first?? all i want is her though

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Well mate I can't tell you what to do...but I would say.

 

You need to make a decisive decision, you see her tomorrow see what she has to say, but try not to fall into the emotional trap of I love yous cuddling kissing but not actually getting anywhere, if this was me, I'd agree to see her, see what she says, tell her how you feel you have to get that across but make sure you listen to her, and by the end of it, a decision has to be made, whether your going to try again if you can and want to and if she does, if a decision aint made then it's just her trying to fill her ego and let go of you slowly at her own pace so she doesn't miss you, if anything less than lets sort this out getting back together etc before she leaves then I'd take that as gospel she doesn't want to sort it she's had ample opportunity she had this last time you gave her and she chose not to again, so then it will be time to let go yano and then you have to mate as hard as it is you'll have to block her number and delete everything.

 

So in essence I'd see her see what she says try to contain yourself, if she doesn't say that she wants to sort it out and mean it, then it's time to let go.

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xinaxxsdertf

Yea when she came over last weekend i fell into that trap of cuddles/kisses like everything was still normal. This time i need to keep my head high and know what i want. Im not even sure if i should give her another chance but I will see how it goes when she comes to see me.

 

If we cant agree to make it work then i will have to tell her the texts need to stop. she cant keep texting me every few days telling me she misses me. Im not sure how I am going to react because i miss her so dearly but even if i do let her back in my life, will i ever be able to trust her again. I think i will always be on edge wondering when is she going to break up with me. so yeah i will listen and see what she has to say, and then its my turn to make a decision on what i think is best for myself. I guess we will we see if I end up making the decision with my head or my heart. whatever one turns up at the time. ughh its 2am and im off to work lol god dammit! should be in bed all warm and snuggled up :(

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Ahhh man, that sucks you have to make sure you think with your head pal....you need to decide whether you can deal with it or not pal if not you have to let go....but make sure your in control pal and let us know how you get on, do what's right for you.

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xinaxxsdertf

Yeah last time i took her back, i didnt fully commit and it kept breaking her to pieces. i didnt fully commit bcoz i always thought ahe was going to dump me again. This time i feel a little wiser, and i know its unfair on her bcoz if i do take her back then i need to give it my all. But i also need to protect nyself so if i have any doubts in how i will perform in a bew relationzhip then its best to end it before it begins so i need to tell her i cant.

 

Its going to be the hardest thing to do, to look in the eyes of the one that ive loved dearly for the past almost 3 years and tell her we need to let go of eachother. And now i jist found out i dont finish work until later on so i might not even be able to see her before she leaves. She is probably looking forward to seeing me too so it wont be the best of news but oh well, shes gone this far without seeing me, a few more days wont hurt

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xinaxxsdertf

Didnt get to meet up bro. ended up stuck at work. I am so confused about her feelings right now. She didnt try very hard to work something out to be able to see me before she left and then just didnt text or anything after i said i couldnt make it.

 

But oh well, already judging by the way im reacting, ive already gone too deep again. Feel like im just going round in a cycle at the moment. Since when did she become my priority again? I dont even know wat im doing anymore

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Ahhhh man

 

 

We'll on my front I broke nc this morning because it's getting abit much in my face now with her new guy or whatever so I just messaged her this.

 

I thought I memt more that you moving on to the next guy s couple months down the line but hey whatever Its your right to move on and ive not done anything and kept away but I'd appreciate it if you were careful who you trust and stop people rubbing it in my face cause I'm not interested, cheers

 

Don't sound to bad does it?

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Well update from the message, she replied saying it was a harmless date, blah blah as I've said she has the right to move on and has done nothing wrong if I don't wanna know I shouldn't look.....wow heart broken

 

I just replied with well people on your side should not be trying to force it in my face, I thought we meant more than a couple months down the line you've moved on, and all the horrible things she said to me about my past relationship being with someone who had a child, now she's dating some one with not what a hippocrite but cheers for the tip and goodbye :/

 

Well today sucks ass haha

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xinaxxsdertf

Yeah thats horrible man. "like you said its my right to move on". Thats such a b**** thing to say. She clearly doesnt even care for you anymore man. Funny how girls can go from making you feel like the most special in the world to absolutely forgetting about you. its horrible.

 

I texted me ex before i went to sleep lastnight and asked why does she keep saying she loves me blah blah and she said because she does. then she started saying goodnight she loves me. So i just told her, nah it doesnt work like that. Enjoy the rest of your week. She called me an a**hole lol. My ex still doesnt even think about the way i feel. everything she says is about her, since when did she get so caught up in her own self? She use to put me first but now is too blind to even try. herself always comes first now.

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I know man, I had a big thing to write out my feelongs tell her everything but after she said that I was just like she's completely shut the door on me so I just said I'd appreciate you not ****ing with my heart and feelings at your disposal goodbye, left it at that.....I just can't ****ing believe moving on just like that that quick after everything and tout then being so heartless about it like yeah done nothing wrong do what I want, yeah you can but ****ing hell, I literally meant nothing, cheers, definitely one of those people that can't not be in a relationship jumping from one to the other.

 

 

It don't work like that though mate he has to want it all or nothing yano.

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xinaxxsdertf

Yeah your ex sounds like a b**** bro. But then again, some people deal with break ups different than others. Maybe her way of dealing with it was to jump straight to a rebound. Its just strange how she can be with another man And not think about you after being with you for so long.

 

I think thats the main question everyone wants to know, is how to move on like your ex does. Its gonna turn out better for you in the end though. Youre working on yourself and bettering yourself which is going to benefit you in your future relationships. Where as she is just going to carry her baggage from one RS to another

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