Western men seeking foreign wives.

[SawtoothMars]

If all it takes to be an "Eastern" woman is taking pride in being a wife, then I'm Eastern as phuk!!

Jay, if you want to search elsewhere for a wife, go for it. The problem American women may have with this is being judged harshly for not being "traditional" (which you never blatantly stated, but is implied).

I've lived in a country with women like the ones you're seeking. And even though the divorce rate is extremely low, these people are not in happy marriages for the most part. Especially those our age.

 

I'm going to be totally honest and say that I've never met an American woman who didn't "think" she was the best wife ever.

 

My experience is primarily with women from the Millennial generation and it isn't very positive. The biggest difference seems to be that women from other cultures are more family oriented and American females are more "self" oriented.

 

I think American women are judged harshly not because of their failure to be traditionalists... but because they only want to keep traditions that benefit them. They constantly rail against things like "slut shaming", yet are unwilling to pay for themselves. They constantly bitch about gender pay gaps, but could care less that men under 30 are currently earning less that women.

 

Don't get me wrong... there are still some good ones out there. Good luck sifting through the refuse to find her though.

[Els]

 

OP, don't stress about what some of the foreign-born women discuss here. More than likely, they come from rich (by third world standards) families and were brought up pretty far removed from the country itself.

 

I know some women like this and there was a huge difference between what they told me and what I experienced when I went to these countries. Most get their information from the news and not from experience.

 

Oh, yes, certainly your week-long tour of 'these countries' would render you much more knowledgeable about the women there, than someone who has spent a couple of decades living in such a country...

 

At any rate, cultural norms are not always followed by everyone, and even if they were, the cultural norms in different countries (or different parts of countries) differ. Think about the Caucasian men you know and how different each and every one of them is. Then extrapolate the differences and multiply by a hundredfold, and you arrive at the differences between 'foreign women'.

 

Thanks man, that's exactly what I was telling jasmine, what she said didn't add up to what I've seen. And you're not very likely to hear about positive stories from women because, well......... I'm not gonna bother.

 

Dude, seriously, nobody needs to convince you of anything. As a matter of fact, I encouraged you to go and travel if you haven't been out of your own backyard before. If you genuinely think that 'foreign women' are going to be most compatible with your needs and desires, then what are you still sitting around at home for?

[SawtoothMars]

Oh, yes, certainly your week-long tour of 'these countries' would render you much more knowledgeable about the women there, than someone who has spent a couple of decades living in such a country...

At any rate, cultural norms are not always followed by everyone, and even if they were, the cultural norms in different countries (or different parts of countries) differ. Think about the Caucasian men you know and how different each and every one of them is. Then extrapolate the differences and multiply by a hundredfold, and you arrive at the differences between 'foreign women'.

 

This is kind of worth talking about. The women who are actively trying to date outside their culture are often doing it to get away from aspects of the culture they don't like. For example, I've met Indian women who just didn't want to deal with an overbearing mother-in-law. I also know a Japanese woman who is over 30 and wants to get away from the extremely age oriented dating culture in her home country. So, in essence what you are saying is true that foreign women looking for husbands outside their own country are often not within the mainstream norm.

 

Dude, seriously, nobody needs to convince you of anything. As a matter of fact, I encouraged you to go and travel if you haven't been out of your own backyard before. If you genuinely think that 'foreign women' are going to be most compatible with your needs and desires, then what are you still sitting around at home for?

 

I expect he will try it out. It may wind up being one of life's most rewarding endeavors.

 

I have done a good chunk of traveling... and frankly the culture in the U.S. which at one point was the worlds best is today kind of craptastic. Marriage is kind of pointless.

[stillafool]

Western men seeking foreign wives

 

I haven't read this entire thread but I don't see anything wrong with western men seeking wives from other countries. Whatever floats their boat. If it stops them from complaining all the time about US women and makes them happy go for it.

[SawtoothMars]

Western men seeking foreign wives

I haven't read this entire thread but I don't see anything wrong with western men seeking wives from other countries. Whatever floats their boat. If it stops them from complaining all the time about US women and makes them happy go for it.

 

I kind of worry about it myself from a socioeconomic standpoint.

 

Marriage rates in our country are at an all-time low. Something like 58% of kids are born to unwed mothers... who then live in squalid poverty and generally fail as parents. If we want ANY kind of future for our country we need to do something to fix this problem. Part of it is a lack of marriage quality men, and partly to the government pissing trillions away to support single moms who in return suck at raising kids.

[stillafool]

But aren't most of these single moms here American women? If so, why aren't they more marriage minded as well instead of having babies out of wedlock. I don't see how Amercan men not marrying foreign women is going to solve that problem.

[Phoe]

I come from a small town, and have a mix of modern and traditional values.

 

I cook and bake for the men in my life. I'm a fantastic cleaner, I actually enjoy cleaning. I like the home to be a home! Comfortable and welcoming. At the same time, I also work, always will work, and am interested in equality for men and women, so I'm not bothered with being paid for, and prefer to split costs and have equal money contribution.

 

I don't "expect" anything in return but to be loved and respected.

[SawtoothMars]

But aren't most of these single moms here American women? If so, why aren't they more marriage minded as well instead of having babies out of wedlock. I don't see how Amercan men not marrying foreign women is going to solve that problem.

 

It is a problem because at this point 13% of the marriages in this country are between high quality American men and foreign brides. With such a large chunk of men abandoning local women it reduces their marriage prospects drastically.

 

Instead they seem to be opting to have children outside marriage with men who are not suitable fathers.

[SawtoothMars]

I come from a small town, and have a mix of modern and traditional values.

I cook and bake for the men in my life. I'm a fantastic cleaner, I actually enjoy cleaning. I like the home to be a home! Comfortable and welcoming. At the same time, I also work, always will work, and am interested in equality for men and women, so I'm not bothered with being paid for, and prefer to split costs and have equal money contribution.

I don't "expect" anything in return but to be loved and respected.

 

Do you really live in California? Guys there are like a totally different species.

 

If you are struggling down there, my suggestion would be to try Asian guys if you are not already... or move. My male friends in California are some of the most superficial men I've ever met.

[Phoe]

Do you really live in California? Guys there are like a totally different species.

 

If you are struggling down there, my suggestion would be to try Asian guys if you are not already... or move. My male friends in California are some of the most superficial men I've ever met.

 

Yeah I've struggled here, spent many years single, but finally found a man who does love and respect me.

 

I've dated every race EXCEPT asian. Asians never had an interest in me. I was always open to it though.

[jay1983]

Oh, yes, certainly your week-long tour of 'these countries' would render you much more knowledgeable about the women there, than someone who has spent a couple of decades living in such a country...

 

I'm from a foreign country and have family there.

Dude, seriously, nobody needs to convince you of anything. As a matter of fact, I encouraged you to go and travel if you haven't been out of your own backyard before. If you genuinely think that 'foreign women' are going to be most compatible with your needs and desires, then what are you still sitting around at home for?

I wasn't looking for your approval. If you read my OP, it asks does anybody have experience with foreign women. Western men with first hand experience.

[jay1983]

It is a problem because at this point 13% of the marriages in this country are between high quality American men and foreign brides. With such a large chunk of men abandoning local women it reduces their marriage prospects drastically.

 

Instead they seem to be opting to have children outside marriage with men who are not suitable fathers.

 

They don't show you that on TV, they show the dysfunctional and horror stories.

[jay1983]

Yeah I've struggled here, spent many years single, but finally found a man who does love and respect me.

 

I've dated every race EXCEPT asian. Asians never had an interest in me. I was always open to it though.

 

Same here. Mostly hispanic, then white, some black and little to no asian women are attracted to me.

[Davey L]

I married an African girl, I'm English. I have no basis for comparison of course as I've never been married to an English woman. But it does bring some unique difficulties, compensated by some good points too.

 

As others have said there are more traditional gender roles. I'm fine with that but be aware she will expect and demand that I do the man's work.

 

There are cultural differences that can lead to friction. For example we often fought over things like how daughter should be brought up, with wife focussed on how to bring her up to make a good wife and me wanting to focus on a good education.

 

We had very little in common. There are still very few things we do together.

 

On the plus side it can be very interesting with the different cultural backgrounds. I feel I have gained a deepinsight into her culture that few westerners manage.

 

Overall it's been difficult yet interesting and challenging. I wouldn't change it for anything. But don't do it if you want an easy and comfortable life!

[SummerDreams]

One of my best friends married an Asian woman he met while he was overseas. He is the happiest married guy I know. According to her, her culture takes great pride in being a good wife. I have never known a wife who was so good to her husband.

 

Since that's all kinda vague, here are some examples. My buddy gets every meal prepared for him, and she does so happily. He works early, so she wakes up to make him breakfast, and packs his lunch before he goes. While he is at work, she starts preparing his dinner, which will be ready not long after he gets home. No Hamburger Helper crap, either. She learned the things he likes, and makes all of his favorite meals. This one is my absolute favorite. I helped them move into their new place, and when I got there, my buddy asked me to wait a moment before we could leave to pick up the things he was bringing back to his new place. He went into his bedroom and came out with a new shirt on. When I asked why he changed into a new T-shirt just for us to be moving furniture around, his wife said that her husband would NOT leave the house in a wrinkled shirt, so she was ironing it for him. I had to ask her why. She said that she would be a failure as a wife if she didn't do those things for her husband. She meant it.

 

That's the sort of dedication she has to her husband. According to her, it is part of her culture, and that most of the women in her country would do the same thing. I have never met a Western woman who is nearly as good to her man. Not even close.

 

Do you realize that for a woman to be like you described should not be working? Or do you think she'd iron his shirt to move furniture after 10 hours at work?

 

(I'm exactly like her btw and I love it).

[SawtoothMars]

Yeah I've struggled here, spent many years single, but finally found a man who does love and respect me.

I've dated every race EXCEPT asian. Asians never had an interest in me. I was always open to it though.

 

I'm glad you found somebody!

 

They don't show you that on TV, they show the dysfunctional and horror stories.

 

Here is the thing... Our media NEVER challenges narratives. Once you allow someone to set the tone of a discussion... the media just runs with it.

[stillafool]

It is a problem because at this point 13% of the marriages in this country are between high quality American men and foreign brides. With such a large chunk of men abandoning local women it reduces their marriage prospects drastically.

 

Instead they seem to be opting to have children outside marriage with men who are not suitable fathers.

 

I don't think the reason for all the unwed mothers here in the US is because American men have abandoned them for foreign brides. It is the womens choice to have these babies without a husband. What happened to waiting until marriage to have kids? From the documentaries I've seen of men marrying foreign women; these men are anything but high quality.

[umirano]

I've been to a couple places overseas and I noticed the women there are very approachable and easy to talk to.

 

They're often easy to talk to as you're a foreigner. It's like that regardless of whether you look at this fact in an eastern or western country. Foreign people always attract more attention. When I was in the US girls would show more interest in me than on my home continent. When I travel to the east same thing.

 

Anybody have any experience with foreign women or married to eastern women?

I was married to an east asian girl. I left her bc I fell in love with someone else. Culture is definitely different and in some ways to the advantage of the hypothetical husband. One of the reasons I do not regret leaving her though is the fact that she was very dependent on me. So "foreign" (as in non-western) culture has advantages AND disadvantages. I've also dated mexican, african and eastern european girls. Pretty much the same thing all over. You'll find confident, lazy, busy, smart, dumb, beautiful and ugly girls in all those countries. Culture and genetics just shift parameters in a certain way, but it never guarantees a certain property of a possible date or partner just bc she's from a certain country or region.

[SawtoothMars]

I don't think the reason for all the unwed mothers here in the US is because American men have abandoned them for foreign brides. It is the womens choice to have these babies without a husband. What happened to waiting until marriage to have kids? From the documentaries I've seen of men marrying foreign women; these men are anything but high quality.

 

The documentary carefully selects it's loser subjects because that creates interest and drama. It has no bearing on averages or statistics.

 

Every major city in the U.S. has a huge gender disparity gap among singles. In particular it is middle class and upper middle class men who marry foreign brides. 13% is a HUGE number... and only a handful of those guys are low quality. Otherwise they wouldn't be able to pay for all the damn fees associated with bringing a wife over.

 

For lower class women marriage is no longer something they can hope to achieve... however motherhood is not only within reach, but also rewarding. Single moms WANT to get married, but the men just are not available.

[stillafool]

Why do we never hear women complaining that there are no eligible bachelors because they all are seeking to marry foreign women? I do hear that there are alot of men marrying Asian women but I hear this from men not women. Women don't seem to be bothered by it at all. Just because a man has money does not mean he is attractive to all women. The only ones who seem to care about the money are gold diggers. Most women want a man they are highly attracted to and that doesn't necessarily include his money. American women are educating themselves so they do not have to depend on a man for money and alot have rewarding careers. The upper class men you describe that marry the foreign brides are obviously not that desirable or they wouldn't have to go to other countries to wed. American women would be available to them if they were. American women are highly desired and that's why they don't have a problem if men want to travel to other countries to explore foreign women. Oh, not to mention not all women these days want to be a mother.

[jay1983]

They're often easy to talk to as you're a foreigner. It's like that regardless of whether you look at this fact in an eastern or western country. Foreign people always attract more attention. When I was in the US girls would show more interest in me than on my home continent. When I travel to the east same thing.

 

 

How do they know I'm/your foreign?

[jay1983]

Why do we never hear women complaining that there are no eligible bachelors because they all are seeking to marry foreign women? I do hear that there are alot of men marrying Asian women but I hear this from men not women. Women don't seem to be bothered by it at all. Just because a man has money does not mean he is attractive to all women. The only ones who seem to care about the money are gold diggers. Most women want a man they are highly attracted to and that doesn't necessarily include his money. American women are educating themselves so they do not have to depend on a man for money and alot have rewarding careers. The upper class men you describe that marry the foreign brides are obviously not that desirable or they wouldn't have to go to other countries to wed. American women would be available to them if they were. American women are highly desired and that's why they don't have a problem if men want to travel to other countries to explore foreign women. Oh, not to mention not all women these days want to be a mother.

 

They are complaining. "Where have the good men gone?" "why are all the good men taken?" "There are no real men, they just play video games"

 

You seriously haven't heard any of that?

 

I can't believe he had to explain to you why that documentary showed dysfunctional men. Seriously, you think they're gonna show the happy people?

 

I work with 2 white guys, one is married to a thai woman and the other a filipina. One's the head of the department and the other's the lead designer. They don't show you that on the documentary, because you probably wouldn't find it very entertaining.

[Cristo]

Why do we never hear women complaining that there are no eligible bachelors because they all are seeking to marry foreign women? I do hear that there are alot of men marrying Asian women but I hear this from men not women. Women don't seem to be bothered by it at all.

 

No one is saying that you should be bothered by it.

 

For the record, I don't think that most men (especially not good-looking, socially savvy men) are going overseas to find women. I've lived in one of these countries before and have seen the kinds of guys that generally go there. They are mostly old, fat, and socially awkward.

 

However, a guy that is young, decent-looking, with decent social skills can get seriously top notch girls in these countries, while they would just be considered average in their own country (guess how I know lol).

 

Just because a man has money does not mean he is attractive to all women. The only ones who seem to care about the money are gold diggers. Most women want a man they are highly attracted to and that doesn't necessarily include his money. American women are educating themselves so they do not have to depend on a man for money and alot have rewarding careers. The upper class men you describe that marry the foreign brides are obviously not that desirable or they wouldn't have to go to other countries to wed. American women would be available to them if they were. American women are highly desired and that's why they don't have a problem if men want to travel to other countries to explore foreign women. Oh, not to mention not all women these days want to be a mother.

 

American women are not highly desired outside of the US and (possibly) Europe.

 

In the US, a woman that is height-weight proportional will have her choice of men. The average woman in the US has far more options than the average man simply because of her gender. It seems that this has led to an inflated sense of self-worth in most women.

 

To give you an idea, an American man in Asia feels the same way that an American woman feels in America.

[jay1983]

No one is saying that you should be bothered by it.

 

For the record, I don't think that most men (especially not good-looking, socially savvy men) are going overseas to find women. I've lived in one of these countries before and have seen the kinds of guys that generally go there. They are mostly old, fat, and socially awkward.

 

However, a guy that is young, decent-looking, with decent social skills can get seriously top notch girls in these countries, while they would just be considered average in their own country (guess how I know lol).

 

 

 

American women are not highly desired outside of the US and (possibly) Europe.

 

In the US, a woman that is height-weight proportional will have her choice of men. The average woman in the US has far more options than the average man simply because of her gender. It seems that this has led to an inflated sense of self-worth in most women.

 

To give you an idea, an American man in Asia feels the same way that an American woman feels in America.

 

I'm not by any means old fat or socially awkward and nowhere near ugly. I'm actually seeing someone I just a couple of weeks ago. I can't have my pick of attractive women, but every now and I do meet one who's interested. The thing is this isn't my first rodeo. These women start off nice and go to shyt after a few months.

[Cristo]

I'm not by any means old fat or socially awkward and nowhere near ugly. I'm actually seeing someone I just a couple of weeks ago. I can't have my pick of attractive women, but every now and I do meet one who's interested. The thing is this isn't my first rodeo. These women start off nice and go to shyt after a few months.

 

I was talking about abroad man lol. I can't have my pick of attractive women in the US. I get a really attractive one every now and then, but it's mostly just average women that want me to put in tons of effort to get them with little reward.