Hey, guys! Want to see a REAL woman???

[123321]

There are really only two ways to explain this.

 

1) Either you are right, most men would find her very unappealing - and that means that most men, if they do not put themselves at the 'top' of the food chain, would either find themselves resigning to a lifetime of settling or a lifetime of singlehood. At any rate, most men below the top, say, 1%, would have a very, very unhappy life.

 

2) You are wrong, and this only speaks for yourself and the other guys on this board.

 

Which do you think it is?

 

Option 3: No one here is perfect and we realize we can be miserable agonizing over it or learn to overlook some imperfection and enjoy what we can offer each other.

[ltjg45]

There are really only two ways to explain this.

 

1) Either you are right, most men would find her very unappealing - and that means that most men, if they do not put themselves at the 'top' of the food chain, would either find themselves resigning to a lifetime of settling or a lifetime of singlehood. At any rate, most men below the top, say, 1%, would have a very, very unhappy life.

 

2) You are wrong, and this only speaks for yourself and the other guys on this board.

 

Which do you think it is?

 

That would imply that, for #2, despite the positive comments here, she has other options if she wasn't currently happily married.

 

We don't know that. Only she does.

[soccerrprp]

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have a LS convention. For the frequenters of this forum to get together and meet face to face. I think it would amazing and insightful.

 

The woman in the article far from hopeless and attractive. The problem is with those that feel that they are not even given the opportunity to make such transformations. I don't know any woman that wouldn't put up a pic of herself at her best. They, we all, know that physical attraction is the FIRST thing we notice.

 

I don't know. The article is insightful in itself, but it still plays to the pressure and need for women to have to doll themselves up to look good. Sure, w/o all that she wouldn't get a second look form most, but the fact that she can change to become or appear much more attractive is worth noting. And important.

[KraftDinner]

I think the biggest problem here is that the inexperienced guys who are 'turned off' by a normal, healthy women with a beautiful but imperfect body have never been in love.

 

Until they experience feelings of desire for a woman based on more than the arrangement and size of her body parts, they probably won't understand how an imperfect woman can be HOT!

 

Good points.

 

And I maintain that she is better than average. I don't like her lower body either, but I can see that others might. Reality is that she IS attractive.

 

Nobody is universally attractive.

 

Except me, of course.

[SJC2008]

@ES: This may be the united states of fatmerica but for you to say her body is better than most american women is ignorant all due respect.

 

I'd date her in a heart beat. She also serves as a great example of one of my "gripes" in that a woman with her little extra is seen more often than not with a skinny guy, skinnier than her. I wonder why that is?

 

I seen the vid and she looks great so kudos to her! The "new" he is way out of my league!

[soccerrprp]

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have a LS convention. For the frequenters of this forum to get together and meet face to face. I think it would amazing and insightful.

 

The woman in the article far from hopeless and attractive. The problem is with those that feel that they are not even given the opportunity to make such transformations. I don't know any woman that wouldn't put up a pic of herself at her best. They, we all, know that physical attraction is the FIRST thing we notice.

 

I don't know. The article is insightful in itself, but it still plays to the pressure and need for women to have to doll themselves up to look good. Sure, w/o all that she wouldn't get a second look form most, but the fact that she can change to become or appear much more attractive is worth noting. And important.

 

...dang it meant "unattractive."

[USMCHokie]

First, I just don't judge people against an objective standard of beauty. I simply don't. Yes, I think the "scale" is lame, but I'm not taking a stance about that here.

 

But don't you have an "standard of beauty" of your own? Not everyone is the same...

 

I can easily look at a person and recognize that they are physically beautiful without having any response AT ALL to it.

 

And that is all we're doing here. Recognizing beauty (or lack thereof) without having any emotional response.

 

The bar scenario? I think it's really over simplified and there is not room in it for what really happens. Sure people who are like I am will recognize that the good looking guy is, in fact, a good looking guy. This does not illicit a response out of me other than a mild appreciation of his looks.

 

And again, this is all that was done here. I had a mild disappreciation of her looks. That's it. I'm not evaluating her on anything else, and I have no intention of dating her, so I need not look further.

[USMCHokie]

Based on what some of the fellas on here say, it's amazing that more than 10,000 people in the US ever get married and have sex on a regular basis.

 

Can you imagine the population crisis we'd face if the vast majority of men didn't find anyone who looked like the woman in question attractive at all?

 

Well, it actually goes to suggest that like "attracts" like. The arbitrary 10,000 women you mention will likely be paired up with the 10,000 men of the highest percentile. Indeed, someone will find that woman attractive, but many others won't. You should stop to consider which men do. It will become more clear to you then.

 

Like attracts like.

[USMCHokie]

Would not hook up with the woman in the OP. She's not ugly, but definitely underwhelming and average at best. IMO.

 

But could she attract an underwhelming or average guy...?

[man_in_the_box]

Im still curious about the goal of this thread. Is it to assess whatever type of body posters find attractive? Is it to get across the message that this is what men should find attractive and if you don't then you're shallow? Or is it that women with different bodies aren't 'real'? What is it you want to hear, OP?

[LittleTiger]

Im still curious about the goal of this thread. Is it to assess whatever type of body posters find attractive? Is it to get across the message that this is what men should find attractive and if you don't then you're shallow? Or is it that women with different bodies aren't 'real'? What is it you want to hear, OP?

 

You're joking right?

 

I bet there isn't a single woman reading this thread who doesn't understand the goal of it!

 

It is posted in the physical fitness, health and weight management section of LS. It has absolutely nothing to do with men!!!!! It's not about your opinions, or what you find attractive, or whether or not you are shallow or even what kind of body you think women should should have!

 

It is about women's mental and physical health. It's about women loving themselves as they are. It's about women being fit and healthy - making the most of what they've got and not beating themselves up for being physically imperfect.

 

Sorry to speak for you CarrieT but, seriously, are the men of LS really only able to relate to women from a completely egocentric viewpoint?

[AlexDP]

You're joking right?

 

I bet there isn't a single woman reading this thread who doesn't understand the goal of it!

 

It is posted in the physical fitness and health management section of LS. It has absolutely nothing to do with men!!!!! It's not about your opinions, or what you find attractive, or whether or not you are shallow or even what kind of body you think women should should have!

 

It is about women's mental and physical health. It's about women loving themselves as they are. It's about women being fit and healthy - making the most of what they've got and not beating themselves up for being physically imperfect.

 

Sorry to speak for you CarrieT but, seriously, are the men of LS really only able to relate to women from a completely egocentric viewpoint?

 

 

 

And as if there's no pressure on men.. You are constantly confronted with magazines that show yet another guy with perfectly sculpted abs. It's not just women that "have" to strive for the perfect body.

 

Also, I really doubt that the woman pictured has much problems attracting men. Perhaps not people who look like Brad Pitt, but surely she has men interested in her. To be frank, her entire post makes her look like a self centered narcissistic person rather than a self assured person, who would not feel the need to come out like that.

Edited April 21, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[LeGenDary_Man]

I think that already happens. Hence some of the lonely men on LS.

 

I think it's nice that woman's sexuality is more fluid in that regard. That they appreciate men, as men. As they are, instead of requiring them to get implants, face lifts or wear make up to be better.

 

I don't think the issue is ugly men staying ugly. I think the issue is that man haven't evolved as far as women have in this regard.

Gender psychology comes in to play here.

 

By default, female gender has greater romantic and fashionable appeal then male gender worldwide; cultures themselves shape "gender roles" in this way. Attraction, love, sexuality, beauty; personality; preferences all are ingredients that may determine the level of romance in a relationship. Of-course, this subject is more complex.

 

Women have always been interested in "beautifying" themselves in history because women fully understand that looks/fashion-sense invite attention in their case; men also adhere to this psychology. Modern era organizations are pushing boundaries with feminine beauty with manipulative tactics and people fall for these marketing tricks. This propaganda gives rise to "unrealistic expectations."

 

Traditionally, men have adopted the roles of "providers/maintainers" of women; men are typically motivated to be career-oriented due to this reason alone. This mindset persists among men because this is how a large number of them have a chance to get a woman to marry them. Therefore, men tend to be not much in to "perfecting themselves physically" because they can get away with this. Fact is that men are not under pressure to make themselves physically appealing. Yes, many men do like to dress-up good, bath regularly and appear smart in public to give a positive vibe about themselves (organizations have also played a role in pushing men in this direction). However, men instinctively understand that they do not have to "beautify" themselves for women but rather charm them with their personalities and accomplishments. Situation differs in case of women who not just charm men with their personalities but also beauty. Of-course, their are grey shades in all of this but traditional mindset have not changed in the context of genders and associated expectations with them.

 

Therefore, I don't find it surprising if women generally do not rate "pretty boys" high in their target list of men if these are lacking in other aspects such as personality and providing abilities.

 

And I'm just explaining why that is simply not enough for most males.

 

I can see a male actually wanting to be with her for a relationship but I can also see the sex life of that relationship, when given with an average male, to be very lacking.

 

Males need the physical attraction to be sexually active. My mind was cold when I saw her images. I couldn't even get the courage to approach her if I saw her in public.

 

So, yeah, great personality but unless I'm willing to give up sex permanently, I can't see me actually sticking with her in the long run.

 

I'm glad she did find a male that do want all of her. She does deserve it.

Your perception might immensely change when you will grow older and mature-up more with passage of time.

 

Trust me! Taste for "perfectionism" goes out of the window once reality starts to sink-in.

 

Even if you get to marry a "model type" women, you will notice major changes in her body structure during the phase of motherhood. Yes, the women might try to keep herself in shape but she might never be as perfect as she was prior to motherhood. So during the course of her motherhood, it would be your "emotional bonding" with her which will keep you attracted to her. In this scenario, her personality will play a role in keeping you interested rather then her body. This is why, physical beauty is not everything.

Edited April 21, 2013 by LeGenDary_Man

[KraftDinner]

I'm actually kind of surprised by some of the responses - my first reaction to the article was that it wasn't anyway indicative of a "real" woman. It was an extremely attractive woman who literally had to slouch and make faces to look less attractive.

 

I'm not sure about rating scales - and this could just speak to the subjectivity of attractiveness - but I would think she's definitely above average - like a '7' easily. A '5' (i.e. average) in my opinion would look more like this:

 

Browse Photos - My Body Gallery - What Real Women Look Like

 

I definitely see how media images have completely altered our vision of "average"...

 

Yes, this.

 

The chick linked in the OP is seriously above average. I can understand if she's not your cup of tea, but how you can't see that she would appeal to many others is just odd.

[LeGenDary_Man]

I love this woman - I really do...

 

She has a handful of mirror images the likes of which get put up on OLD or are used to attract guys. You know, face made-up and peacocking her stuff to look more attractive.

 

But she also shows that she is a normal, healthy, real woman - the kind that if many guys saw without the primping, wouldn't want.

 

Go figure. This is for you guys who want those women you see in magazines. They aren't real...

You have a SOLID point to make in this thread.

 

@All of those "young" men who have been critic of the "example" women;

 

Keep this disclosure of mine in mind:

 

Your perception might immensely change when you will grow older and mature-up more with passage of time.

 

Trust me! Taste for "perfectionism" goes out of the window once reality starts to sink-in.

 

Even if you get to marry a "model type" women, you will notice major changes in her body structure during the phase of motherhood. Yes, the women might try to keep herself in shape but she might never be as perfect as she was prior to motherhood. So during the course of her motherhood, it would be your "emotional bonding" with her which will keep you attracted to her. In this scenario, her personality will play a role in keeping you interested rather then her body. This is why, physical beauty is not everything.

 

This disclosure correlates with what CarrieT is trying to convey even if she did not thought this through.

 

You "young" men have lot to learn about women yet.

 

And nope! I am not married yet.

[soccerrprp]

I've said this before. I'm a fit, athletic guy. I run, I lift some, I'm a vegetarian and almost exclusively dated slender and/or fit/athletic women. BUT, the best woman I've dated so far was average and on most days I would not have taken a second look. I connected with her in an emotional way that I cannot fully understand to this day. Really. We're not dating any more, but remain very good friends. But I can tell you that I have become far less "picky" when viewing women's body types now.

 

For me, being fit is a lifestyle and that is why I focused on fit/athletic women. I thought that they would most reflect the lifestyle that I choose for myself. Well, after dating this so-called "average" woman, I know better.

 

Do I want perfection? Hell no. Don't need it.

[USMCHokie]

Do I want perfection? Hell no. Don't need it.

 

Why the focus on perfection...? Where do we get that idea that looking for someone reasonably fit and trim equates to finding "perfection"...?

[xxoo]

You're joking right?

 

I bet there isn't a single woman reading this thread who doesn't understand the goal of it!

 

It is posted in the physical fitness, health and weight management section of LS. It has absolutely nothing to do with men!!!!! It's not about your opinions, or what you find attractive, or whether or not you are shallow or even what kind of body you think women should should have!

 

It is about women's mental and physical health. It's about women loving themselves as they are. It's about women being fit and healthy - making the most of what they've got and not beating themselves up for being physically imperfect.

 

Sorry to speak for you CarrieT but, seriously, are the men of LS really only able to relate to women from a completely egoctric viewpoint?

 

Exactly! It's not about men's opinions of her body. Or women's.

 

It's about her putting photos out the--both flattering and unflattering--that show her real shape, and her being happy with it all.

 

Men and women can judge if the must, but the point is she doesn't give a hoot. SHE likes her body. Her husband loves her body, and she's proud to show her real body--not a carefully posed and retouched version.

 

Jamie lee Curtis did something similar years ago, insisting on printing a completely natural pic of herself in a magazine spread next to the retouched and photoshopped pic. She did it because of the messages that media ages send women and girls, as well as men and boys. Many of the men here could use the reality check of what typical women look like under their Spanx and padded bras!

[soccerrprp]

Why the focus on perfection...? Where do we get that idea that looking for someone reasonably fit and trim equates to finding "perfection"...?

 

Perfection IS Perception. I "thought" that fit/athletic women were perfect for ME. I know that that's not true.

 

Remember, that was MY idea of perfection.

[LeGenDary_Man]

Why the focus on perfection...? Where do we get that idea that looking for someone reasonably fit and trim equates to finding "perfection"...?

Even if you get to marry a girl with this kind of body; will you stop loving her during her motherhood phase?

[xxoo]

Perfection IS Perception. I "thought" that fit/athletic women were perfect for ME. I know that that's not true.

 

Remember, that was MY idea of perfection.

 

Yes, love doesn't consult a checklist. Sometimes we can be surprised by who gets under our skin, and becomes irresistibly attractive. Their belly is sexier than the flattest belly because its their belly.

 

Those who've never been in love probably can't understand how that works.

[Els]

Yes, love doesn't consult a checklist. Sometimes we can be surprised by who gets under our skin, and becomes irresistibly attractive. Their belly is sexier than the flattest belly because its their belly.

 

Those who've never been in love probably can't understand how that works.

 

Yup. I definitely don't think every single one of the bf's features would be rated 'stereotypically attractive' by Mr. Universe judges. But really, screw the judges! Who are they to determine whom I love, anyway?

[Emilia]

Perfection IS Perception. I "thought" that fit/athletic women were perfect for ME. I know that that's not true.

 

Remember, that was MY idea of perfection.

 

My 'perfection' in the physical sense has changed so much over the years. Though it has come full circle... so far. Beyond that (in terms of values, personality, character) it has been a steadier, more linear progression.

[USMCHokie]

Yes, love doesn't consult a checklist. Sometimes we can be surprised by who gets under our skin, and becomes irresistibly attractive. Their belly is sexier than the flattest belly because its their belly.

 

Those who've never been in love probably can't understand how that works.

 

I would argue that we all do have a subconscious (or conscious) "checklist."

[LittleTiger]

I would argue that we all do have a subconscious (or conscious) "checklist."

 

I think that was xxoo's point.

 

Whilst we might 'think' we have some kind of checklist about what matters to us when it comes to physical attraction, love (even lust) doesn't take any notice.

 

People very often find themselves falling head over heels for someone who is nothing like their 'ideal' and items on their 'checklist' are ignored, brushed aside or become completely irrelevant.