moontiger Posted March 28, 2011 Share Posted March 28, 2011 I only emailed her 4 times in the last 11 days. When I was a professor, if a student e-mailed me four separate times in eleven days, it would have raised red flags for me even if he hadn't asked me out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 28, 2011 Author Share Posted March 28, 2011 When I was a professor, if a student e-mailed me four separate times in eleven days, it would have raised red flags for me even if he hadn't asked me out. Anyways like I said after I asked her out, it just seems she is uneasy, hesitant when talking to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 Do you guys think there is a slim chance after the semester is over if I stay in contact with her over the summer then maybe you think I'd have a slight shot at going on a date with her? The last day of class should I maybe ask for her personal email addy to keep in contact? Link to post Share on other sites
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Do you guys think there is a slim chance after the semester is over if I stay in contact with her over the summer then maybe you think I'd have a slight shot at going on a date with her? The last day of class should I maybe ask for her personal email addy to keep in contact? No. There's no chance. And you're facing a sexual harassment suit if you keep this up. Link to post Share on other sites
bac Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Anyways like I said after I asked her out, it just seems she is uneasy, hesitant when talking to me. She needs to have a job and she does not want to get fired/or problems because of the thing. It is a normal and rational thing. If she would accept your offer, she might be a bipolar or smth like that. There are some jobs when a professional can lose everything for things like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Cracker Jack Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Do you guys think there is a slim chance after the semester is over if I stay in contact with her over the summer then maybe you think I'd have a slight shot at going on a date with her? The last day of class should I maybe ask for her personal email addy to keep in contact? Dude. Move. On Not trying to be mean, but it's like you're totally ignoring everything we're saying. Forget her email, her name, and everything once the semester is over. She's made herself clear on the matter. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 No. There's no chance. And you're facing a sexual harassment suit if you keep this up. I never said anything sexually to her. I never comment about a girls looks if you're wanting to ask her out. Because then you're making it obvious you're only asking her out because she's hot. Actually a friend of mine at school said I should have waited until the last day of class and ask for her personal email. that way if she gave it out then I could chat her up and then ask her out possibly. However I didn't want to wait until that so thats why I moved in fast. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Your hopes and expectations are waaaayyy out of line with reality. I think that girls treat you the way that they do because it appears you evaluate them almost solely on appearance and a guy like that can't hide it very well. Broaden your scope. Stick to a pool where there is a chance you can date them. Quit digging your own grave with your teacher. Seriously. I say this to try to help. Link to post Share on other sites
Thedude22 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 (edited) Hey dude that took balls and you should give yourself props for it. Everybody gets shot down, just part of being a guy. You need to teach yourself to hate not knowing what could've been more than being rejected. That's the process I find myself in. Buuut reading some of the other stuff you said...uh yeah let it go man. You always should try to get a girl to go with you but to keep pushing makes you seem like a creep. If a girl doesn't show interest, ignore her and move on to the next one. Don't dwell on your defeats, instead constantly search for victories. Edited March 29, 2011 by Thedude22 Link to post Share on other sites
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 It's not that she's your teacher. It's that you're obsessing over one girl, instead of going after multiple women and letting that girl go, after she (gently) let you down. If I were her, I'd be freaked out as well. You're acting like a stalker, sending her multiple emails, chatting her up, making her uncomfortable. I've never sent that many emails to a professor before, even the hot one I was talking about (that I was going to ask out, then found out she was married.) You need to let this go. I find it hard to believe that there's only 1 hot college aged student in your class. When I take classes, I find 75% of the girls there attractive. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 It's not that she's your teacher. It's that you're obsessing over one girl, instead of going after multiple women and letting that girl go, after she (gently) let you down. If I were her, I'd be freaked out as well. You're acting like a stalker, sending her multiple emails, chatting her up, making her uncomfortable. I've never sent that many emails to a professor before, even the hot one I was talking about (that I was going to ask out, then found out she was married.) You need to let this go. I find it hard to believe that there's only 1 hot college aged student in your class. When I take classes, I find 75% of the girls there attractive. I'm serious there is only one hottie in there. Well two if you include the teacher. I actually have the girls number because they first day of class we had to partner up and the teacher happend to pair us. I was so pumped was like thinking it would be an easy score. However the girl had a boyfried. If not I would have chatted her up, talked to her via text and tried to score a date. Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 (edited) Dude, you need to STOP NOW. We told you this on Page 1. You didn't listen, and now you've become a creeper. You are probably freaking her out, and are extremely close to getting into trouble. This is NOT the way you act with women. Edited March 29, 2011 by Imajerk17 Link to post Share on other sites
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Hottie = sexually attractive Man who is obsessed with "hotties" = creeper I agree with the post above me. Stop. Now. Link to post Share on other sites
utterer of lies Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Dude, you need to STOP NOW. We told you this on Page 1. You didn't listen, and now you've become a creeper. You are probably freaking her out, and are extremely close to getting into trouble. This is NOT the way you act with women. Its obvious he does not want to learn. Probably a harassment suit or something similar is the best way to help him fix his behavior. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 Its obvious he does not want to learn. Probably a harassment suit or something similar is the best way to help him fix his behavior. So you're saying a teacher can sue a student?? Link to post Share on other sites
utterer of lies Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 So you're saying a teacher can sue a student?? Or whatever measures your school has in place for improper behavior such as stalking or harassment. Suspension, Expulsion, whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 Why do girls have to hate me so much? It's like god designed them to hate me or something. Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 You complain that you don't get attention from the girls that you are attracted to. You seem to only be attracted to "hotties" (whatever they are). Are you a hottie yourself? Most people fall into a range of average. Or are you not getting reciprocal attention because you are looking only outside the range of average? Link to post Share on other sites
utterer of lies Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Why do girls have to hate me so much? It's like god designed them to hate me or something. You got a lot of good advice from various people in this thread and decided to ignore it all and do whatever you thought before was best. This proved to be a non-optimal solution. Being this resistant to learning or thinking your actions through might explain why you are having a hard time with dating. Or maybe it's because you are completely shallow and superficial when it comes to girls. But good luck anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 Back from class. It went ok today. That one hot girl whos had a boyfriend for a long time just got engaged. She was showing her ring today! That ends that. About emailing the teacher a lot, she told me she read my email, but that she gets at least 50 emails a day hence she said why she probably didn't reply. She also gave me a lousy grade on my paper. She really nit picked more than usual. Could it be I got on her bad side? Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Back from class. It went ok today. That one hot girl whos had a boyfriend for a long time just got engaged. She was showing her ring today! That ends that. About emailing the teacher a lot, she told me she read my email, but that she gets at least 50 emails a day hence she said why she probably didn't reply. She also gave me a lousy grade on my paper. She really nit picked more than usual. Could it be I got on her bad side? Holy crap, LISTEN! The world's women are NOT lined up against you. The results you have witnessed are partially people just living their lives and partially your behaviour generating poor results. Let's say that the world is '5' and let's say that your goal is '10.' If you put in '-2' you are going to end up with 5+(-2)=3 (not the result you were hoping for) If you do something different and we'll define that as '2' then you end up with 5+2=7. This isn't the result that you were hoping for, but at least you are closer. For some reason (brain function issue, I have no idea) lots of guys that don't have much success with women view them as 'hating them' or "having contempt for them" or "only looking for jerks" or whatever. They fail to see that incredibly often women are just out there living their lives, eating food, cleaning up, going to school, reading, dating, working, passing the salt.... whatever. Just living their lives trying to make the best of it. Hot girl getting engaged has nothing, I repeat nothing to do with you! She met someone she liked, they dated, he proposes, yay for her. It isn't because she doesn't like you or has some weird freaky contempt for you. You aren't even in her frame of reference. She has this whole other life past you, as do the vast majority of the female population. They aren't just waiting around to be objects of your desire. They are out living their lives. "That ends that." Nothing started it! There was nothing to end! Your teacher: she doesn't hate you, probably not in the slightest. What you are now is annoying her. And not because you liked her. People like each other all of the time. If she's half as "hot" as you say, then men probably like her all of the time and she has to shoot them down. She probably gets a student or two a semester that pull the same crap. She probably likes her job, or at least the pension. She isn't going to throw that out for some guy who obviously doesn't have the sense to either wait until the end of semester or at least ask her out in person. You were going for a '10' result. The world is '5', you put in a '-1'. It doesn't mean you are a ****ty person or a 'contemptable guy' it means that your behaviour generate certain results. Often a guy like you will sit and wonder: why can't this girl see what I have to offer and that I am a nice guy. Well, it's because most people can't see magically past behaviour. You don't discount the way someone is acting as a reflection of their character. And furthermore.... hot girls get the most attention because men are often not smart enough to do the math and see the long term gains of dating the average girl. The hot girl gets everyone from millionaires to cardboard box dwellers supplying her with options. It is tough for her to weed out who is just using her and who might actually want to get to know her. She turns down probably 10x more guys then she accepts, easily. She can work her options and easily jump ship in the blink of an eye. Chances are you would only be a stepping stone to a perceived upgrade, depending solely on her character. The average girl is someone who most of the time will not have life handed to her. There of course is a range here but the odds are better of someone that reciprocates respect. Better for long-term odds. Sexually with people there is always adjustment, and it is very rewarding. Broaden your scope, and take some responsibility for where you are in the dating scene. It isn't women's fault that you have only asked out two girls in recent history. I mean, really? You expected your batting average to be 50%? You aren't DG Bradman! And that is your sample size for deciding women hate you? There are 3 billion of us! I hope that that isn't the end of your empirical study. As for your paper. Maybe, maybe not. But I doubt she ransacked it because it looks like you aren't going to leave her well enough alone so you and her 'relationship' may very well end up under review. Don't kid yourself. Your behaviour can wind you up with some consequences simply because you are her student. You seem not to understand this whole professional boundaries thing. It's pretty important. Change your behaviour, read CBT for Dummies, I am and it is an excellent book. Realize that there are social mores that go with dating and your maybe able to modify what you put into dating to achieve your '10' result. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 I forgot to mention this before, but I notice her facebook she has a few students on it. Would it be alright in the future to send her a friend requet, or would she find it creepy I looked her up? Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I forgot to mention this before, but I notice her facebook she has a few students on it. Would it be alright in the future to send her a friend requet, or would she find it creepy I looked her up? No, it wouldn't be OK. You need to back off. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I forgot to mention this before, but I notice her facebook she has a few students on it. Would it be alright in the future to send her a friend requet, or would she find it creepy I looked her up? Um, do you actually read any of the responses, or is everyone on the thread on ignore and you are keeping some kind of rejection journal? Yes you are being creepy. Broaden your scope! Leave this one alone! Abort! Abort! Abort! Link to post Share on other sites
Author one goal Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 No, it wouldn't be OK. You need to back off. I know. This just sucks so bad because she's single and wouldn't even give me a shot. Link to post Share on other sites
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