boxing123 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 I have found it to be interesting that almost all guys I know, of all ages, know how to cook. What has happened to women? It is as if they proudly boast "I can't" or "I don't".. Maybe that's why the height and weight of the average American female is five foot 3, 163 lbs. Yikes! It also makes me cringe when I see these fat moms feeding their fat kids at McDonald's. Or standing in line at the grocery store with tons of processed and easy to make junk food with their fat little kids behind them. Child abuse. No men want to marry a child abuser. So ladies, if you make lots of money, never want kids, and can afford to go out to eat very often, then do not learn how to cook. If you want to impress a man, and make it look as though you have the important skills needed to raise a family, and care for that man, then learn how to cook. It is practical, logical, and healthy. Don't listen to feminists screaming "You should just be liked for whom you are." That is complete nonsense. Men are liked for what they can do and provide. It is no different for women. Let those feminists grow old alone, while you have a man that finds you to be wonderful and irreplaceable. And yes, I want to marry to make my life easier. Your life would be easier as well. See how that works? Link to post Share on other sites
iceis44 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Well there's your problem. clv this is not the 50's, most women do not get the luxury choice of staying at home and raising the kids full time, having your roast beef in the oven by 3pm, while she watches Oprah, Everyone sacrafices alot in a marriage, I decided I was done giving more than I was getting, If your lil woman is gonna be a stay at home, she better have a backup plan, And jmo, have you ever loved someone just for who they are, and how they make you feel, putting aside all of their skills and abilities at making your life easier? Link to post Share on other sites
iceis44 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Let those feminists grow old alone, while you have a man that finds you to be wonderful and irreplaceable. And yes, I want to marry to make my life easier. Your life would be easier as well. See how that works? Are you willing to do your fair share, of laundry, dishes, changing the diapers and taking out the trash, and bring home 75% to 100% of the bacon? Then I would say yipee, your a great catch Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 In my first marriage I brought in 80% of the bacon, did all the housework and took care of everything else while she sniffed coke, got drunk and cheated on me all day yet I still wasn't doing enough according to her. No matter how much a man contributes many women will never be happy as evidenced by my first marriage. For me it is not about the cooking but the fact that a woman is willing to actually be a partner instead of constantly trying to have a confrontational relationship with me. I guess that many men are seeking out more traditional minded women again since trying to make a relationship work with these feminist minded women has more often than not been an execise in futility leading right to divorce court. Link to post Share on other sites
boxing123 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Iceis... It depends on what type of life you want, and where your priorities are. I am willing to bring home 100% of the money, no problem. So in return, I would want other parts of my life to be easier. It is not hard for one income earner to support a family. It is hard for one income earner to support a family and live a very materialistic lifestyle. In many cases where the woman works, she is working really for only a couple dollars an hour. When you take away day care costs, gas costs, the increased costs of eating out and not cooking from home, taxes, work wardrobe, etc, ishe is adding little, but the home is lacking a lot. Let's say a woman bring home 40k. Day care for one child is usually $250 per week. $12500. Gas and other car related expenses for work. $2,000. Clothes for work $2,000. Tax $5,000. Extra food costs for family $4,000. Some estimates are conservative, and some are too much. But as you can see, the woman is adding about $15,000 a year. Or working for $6-7 an hour if she makes 40k. Since I am a business owner I could easily make that much more if the rest of my life was orderly. I would have more time to work. And when not working, we would both be free. So that is where I am coming from. Millions of women want to be stay at home moms after children, but if they cannot cook or do anything of that nature they just become a huge liability. And to clarify, I am not telling any woman to settle down with a lazy man and serve him. That is ridiculous. But if you want to ambitious, hard working, efficient male that would bring much to your life, you must bring something he needs to the table. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 I think it's fair to factor in that some women "like" to work, just as some men "like" domestic duties, irrespective of the economics/social acceptability. That said, IMO, there is a delineation wrt the topic, cooking, that bears an emotional component, that being nurturing of the emotions of the man and his desire for that feeling from his wife/partner. I believe one poster mentioned the path from a man's stomach to his heart. I must say, even for someone who does do domestic duties, in addition to earning a living and doing all the guy stuff (like I alluded to in my previous posting in this thread), I still respond in a positive and loving way to a woman who gives of herself to me in that manner (cooking). As I said prior, its abscence isn't a deal-breaker, but its presence can certainly be a deal-maker Link to post Share on other sites
BoooredGuy Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Maybe that's why the height and weight of the average American female is five foot 3, 163 lbs. Yikes! It also makes me cringe when I see these fat moms feeding their fat kids at McDonald's. Or standing in line at the grocery store with tons of processed and easy to make junk food with their fat little kids behind them. Too true. I remember my parents (immigrants) telling me about this when I was a kid, but I was too young to understand what they were talking about. I'm American born, but I can't believe how true this is. Travel outside of the U.S. and you see the obesity levels decline significantly. But, they also don't share the stereotypical American lifestyle and their cultures are different. Fresh food, and cooking, is common outside of the U.S. - fast food is available but it's nothing like in the U.S., and it's rarely frequented. It is not hard for one income earner to support a family. It is hard for one income earner to support a family and live a very materialistic lifestyle. You don't need a dual income household unless you want a certain lifestyle, or if both really want to work. If you can't manage your life, or a family, on a single income, then you must have made poor personal finance decisions, which I don't have sympathy for. All the information on finances and investments is out their - you just need to seek it out. I know plenty of single income households, where the breadwinner makes far less than six figures, and they are happy and financially sound. They're not rich; they're not wearing designer clothes or driving luxury cars, but most are middle to upper-middle class, and, they're happy. They have kids, they take vacations, they have a nice home, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 clv this is not the 50's, most women do not get the luxury choice of staying at home and raising the kids full time, having your roast beef in the oven by 3pm .... Well I'm able to earn about 4x the US median income so my requirements in a mate do not include "must carry my ass financially". On the other hand since I'm willing, able and eager to care for her financially I do expect her to take care of some other aspects of our joint life. Obviously if we both worked full time that wouldn't be fair. But if we both had to work full time I wouldn't contemplate marriage. As I noted before marriage for me is about a family and if I'm incapable of providing for a family I refuse to begin one. It's always been my stance and it's why I'm just now thinking of it seriously. I'm looking for someone that interests me, someone who shares my life goals and so on, and since she will not need to be working I place value on other things. Please note I'm not actually looking at the moment, I've actually got a few girls I date regularly who seem to be good candidates, I'm more sifting than looking. I've found that despite what the bitter old feminist divorcees say some sweet young women find a traditional life attractive. Good enough for me. Are you willing to do your fair share, of laundry, dishes, changing the diapers and taking out the trash, and bring home 75% to 100% of the bacon? Then I would say yipee, your a great catch I will bring home 100% of the 'bacon', what in your estimation is my fair share of the laundry and dish washing? Link to post Share on other sites
Dexter Morgan Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Looking at the thread about why men date some women and settle down with others, it was brought up that men want to settle down with a woman who cooks. How true is this? Would you date a girl that did not cook and had little interest to learn? Nope. I actually like the arrangement that she cooks her own food, and I fix my own. If she wants a full meal, I will cook it with the full understanding that it isn't going to be some fat ladened, calorie packed dinner. If I let a woman cook my food, I'll be gaining weight for sure. Link to post Share on other sites
iceis44 Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 I will bring home 100% of the 'bacon', what in your estimation is my fair share of the laundry and dish washing? Half, if she works full time also, your fair share is what ever you AND her agree it is, Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 Not even close and don't let anyone make you believe otherwise. You just haven't tried to do it much, if at all. It's easy. It won't take much time to get up to reasonable pace. Not every guy wants a gourmet meal. A lot of men are just happy that someone else cares enough to want to do something for them. Spot on! I'll bet your response gets ignored by female readers as they try to think around and around your straight forward response... Link to post Share on other sites
grogster Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 I've not read all the posts, so if I'm repeating please excuse me. But I do wonder whether for many guys, a woman's refusal to swallow is more of a deal breaker than her failure to cook. I'm not kidding. Contrary to what many mothers say, the way to most men's hearts is not through their stomachs: Aim lower. Link to post Share on other sites
fral945 Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 I've not read all the posts, so if I'm repeating please excuse me. But I do wonder whether for many guys, a woman's refusal to swallow is more of a deal breaker than her failure to cook. I'm not kidding. Contrary to what many mothers say, the way to most men's hearts is not through their stomachs: Aim lower. This reminds me of a saying a guy told me one time: If a woman wants to keep a man she should keep his belly full and his balls empty. Your question calls for another thread I think. Link to post Share on other sites
grogster Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 This reminds me of a saying a guy told me one time: If a woman wants to keep a man she should keep his belly full and his balls empty. Your question calls for another thread I think. fral, that sums it up beautifully. Folk wisdom that's wise. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 I will bring home 100% of the 'bacon', what in your estimation is my fair share of the laundry and dish washing? Half, if she works full time also, your fair share is what ever you AND her agree it is, What part of "I will bring home 100%" was confusing to you? She won't have to work so please what is my fair share of the dish washing? Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 22, 2009 Author Share Posted January 22, 2009 I've not read all the posts, so if I'm repeating please excuse me. But I do wonder whether for many guys, a woman's refusal to swallow is more of a deal breaker than her failure to cook. I'm not kidding. Contrary to what many mothers say, the way to most men's hearts is not through their stomachs: Aim lower. That's fine by me Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 22, 2009 Author Share Posted January 22, 2009 What part of "I will bring home 100%" was confusing to you? She won't have to work so please what is my fair share of the dish washing? If I were to marry someone that made enough money so that I wouldn't have to work and I could stay at home and be a housewife and a mom I wouldn't mind learning how to cook for my family. But that's not my situation, my NEW bf doesn't make that much more than me, so we would BOTH have to work. I am fine with that, I don't mind working. We actually work together. Link to post Share on other sites
rod_in_gtown Posted January 22, 2009 Share Posted January 22, 2009 This thread is actually making me depressed. I feel so worthless. I had no idea that men only wanted to get married to have children. I am just not sure if I want that. With the divorce rate at 50% I fear having kids and then being left on my ass. I grew up poor, and kids are very expensive. I wouldn't want to put my kids through that. If I found the right person who really wanted kids, I probably would, but I would be fine without kids as well. The what ifs are what scares me. I am really going to put some effort in learning how to cook. I just didn't think it was that big of a deal. Like I said I am fine with cleaning if he cooked, and I am also fine with paying when we go out to eat. I thought that was good enough. Well, I have always believed that the whole purpose of marriage was to provide a stable family environment for the children of the couple, and I seem to remember (if I remember my first marriage ceremony correctly) that the purpose of marriage under catholic religion is to create a family. HOWEVER, marriage has evolved and now people get married for a myriad of reasons. I don't even think I will want kids whenever I re-marry, but it's one of those things that I'll have to wait and see how it pans out. I hope my response wasn't the one that depressed you, it's not a deal-breaker for me but I do see a lot of positive in people who are genuinely interested in it. Also, I think that creating a "mold" for what's a deal breaker and applying it to everyone is not really fair because every individual's situation is different. I was watching the Real World the other day and there's a transgender woman on it (she used to be a man) and it made me think, what would happen if I fell in love with a woman only to find out that she couldn't have kids? And I think that it would not be a dealbreaker for me either. If I fall in love, I think I would find a way of making it work, deal-breakers tend to be excuses to break off a relationship or let someone down "easy". Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted January 22, 2009 Share Posted January 22, 2009 If I were to marry someone that made enough money so that I wouldn't have to work and I could stay at home and be a housewife and a mom I wouldn't mind learning how to cook for my family. But that's not my situation, my NEW bf doesn't make that much more than me, so we would BOTH have to work. I am fine with that, I don't mind working. We actually work together. sersiously if you married some one with alot of money you'd be even less likely to cook. I really sugest you learn how to cook regaurdless of the income of the person you are dating its just one of those lifeskills you'll benefit from personaly as well as a nice thing you can do for others. you probably won't always be as happy to live on cereal and grilled cheese Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted January 22, 2009 Share Posted January 22, 2009 This reminds me of a saying a guy told me one time: If a woman wants to keep a man she should keep his belly full and his balls empty. . Even better!!! Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 22, 2009 Share Posted January 22, 2009 Yeah, and think how little time out of her day that would take Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted January 23, 2009 Share Posted January 23, 2009 Yeah, and think how little time out of her day that would take It might actually take a while. There's no such thing as going to bed early... Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 23, 2009 Share Posted January 23, 2009 I mean, cook up and freeze some meals on Sunday and give him a five minute blow job every day. Nothing if not efficient Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted January 23, 2009 Share Posted January 23, 2009 I cooked last night!!!! It made this great grilled chicken on the stove then I heated up some olive oil and dressing in a pot on the stove also. Then after the chicken was done I poured the olive oil/dressing over the chicken. My boyfriend LOVED IT!!!! It really wasn't even that hard. Look at me, I'm all domestic!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
iceis44 Posted January 23, 2009 Share Posted January 23, 2009 I mean, cook up and freeze some meals on Sunday and give him a five minute blow job every day. Nothing if not efficient 5 min a day, since when is that all the time it takes, I cant get out of a bj, without minimum 1.5 hr sex and at least 4 orgasms! Link to post Share on other sites
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