carhill Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Is that a trick question? Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 Is that a trick question? I honestly would love to know. I am all for making my SO happy. I would be glad to do that for him every night and swallow no big deal. Which would guys prefer? Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Truth be told Touche, I wouldn't bear lifelong resentment to anyone, for rejecting me for any reason. As long as they have the maturity to state their reasons, I'll get over it and move on! I won't disagree that "a requirement for cooking" doesn't necessarily constitute a "surrogate mommy" requirement. It's the entire, "do the domestics for my personal comfort and bear my children, to make me happy", that disgusts me. That's no partner. That's a user. Agree 100%. That kind of mentality is absolutely a turn-off. It spills over into SO many other areas too. Candy, my H's mom cooked for him and his sisters but it's just not something he ever expected from a wife. He can cook (not like me of course!). He was a bachelor until he was 30 and took care of himself. As to the cooking and head question...hmmm..I should ask him! I'm not sure what he'd say to that. He'd probably say he wants both. Link to post Share on other sites
boxing123 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 It's the entire, "do the domestics for my personal comfort and bear my children, to make me happy", that disgusts me. That's no partner. That's a user. Sounds like you hate being a woman, and you hate to see happy men. I mean, do you want your future husband to carry the child and breast feed the child? What's wrong with wanting to come home to a meal and a clean house? How is that disgusting? What's disgusting is selfishness and laziness. Or keeping tabs on exactly what you did for someone. Why else would you do the domestics? Yes, it would be to make your husbands life better, and keep him happy and comfortable. So? Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 no, cooking doesn't even figure on my list. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 He was a bachelor until he was 30 and took care of himself. As to the cooking and head question...hmmm..I should ask him! I'm not sure what he'd say to that. He'd probably say he wants both. LOL yeah, my BF is 30, so I am pretty sure he can cook. They would probably all say both, but it just got me thinking because so many men complain that once they get married the sex and especially oral does not happen anymore. So I figured I would just ask the men which they really prefer. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 no, cooking doesn't even figure on my list. Awesome! Now let me ask you did your mom cook for you? Also do you think that the only reason to get married is to have children? Link to post Share on other sites
boxing123 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 LOL Have women become this lazy? Ladies, what do you prefer, the man to work, or have sex with you? You must pick. Link to post Share on other sites
Citizen Erased Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 LOL Have women become this lazy? Ladies, what do you prefer, the man to work, or have sex with you? You must pick. Neither. He sounds like a moron. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 LOL Have women become this lazy? Ladies, what do you prefer, the man to work, or have sex with you? You must pick. I don't think I am lazy. I am educated, worked full-time to put myself through college. I have a BS, I go to the gym, do laundry, clean, etc... Men are the ones that complain about sex most of the time after they get married. So I was just curious. Thats all. Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Awesome! Now let me ask you did your mom cook for you? Yes. Also do you think that the only reason to get married is to have children? No. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 I will never be a chef and thats fine with me, but I do want to learn the basics. Thanks for everyones replies. Well ironically enough I could overlook the cooking thing, as I said it's more about lifestyle and attitude than anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CandyGirlXO Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 Well ironically enough I could overlook the cooking thing, as I said it's more about lifestyle and attitude than anything. This whole time you have said that this would be a deal breaker, now you are saying that you could overlook the cooking thing? Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Men are the ones that complain about sex most of the time after they get married. So I was just curious. Thats all. I have views on that one as well, but maybe another thread would be better. I think it's not really about the sex at it's core though, let's just leave it at that. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 This whole time you have said that this would be a deal breaker, now you are saying that you could overlook the cooking thing? Not knowing how to cook? I'm not a picky eater and I don't date idiots. Any capable person can learn to cook well enough for me. The original comment you picked up on had more to do with attitude and roles in a relationship. But yes honestly there is something magically alluring about a delicious home cooked meal, so if your competition has that in her bag of tricks you might want to learn. Having the attitude that "It's not my job" is the deal breaker. I can fix a toilet and a sink and I'm always learning .... Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 But yes honestly there is something magically alluring about a delicious home cooked meal, So I guess you've learned how to make one? Link to post Share on other sites
boxing123 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 I don't think I am lazy. I am educated, worked full-time to put myself through college. I have a BS, I go to the gym, do laundry, clean, etc... Men are the ones that complain about sex most of the time after they get married. So I was just curious. Thats all. Well that's great. Why does that make you marriage material, especially considering you do not want children? What sets you apart from other women? It is easy for men to have lots of random sex with "career" women. It is much harder to find a woman to marry. Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Well that's great. Why does that make you marriage material, especially considering you do not want children? What sets you apart from other women? It is easy for men to have lots of random sex with "career" women. It is much harder to find a woman to marry. Just import one, I'm sure she'd suit you. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Not knowing how to cook? I'm not a picky eater and I don't date idiots. Any capable person can learn to cook well enough for me. The original comment you picked up on had more to do with attitude and roles in a relationship. But yes honestly there is something magically alluring about a delicious home cooked meal, so if your competition has that in her bag of tricks you might want to learn. Having the attitude that "It's not my job" is the deal breaker. I can fix a toilet and a sink and I'm always learning .... Funny, you're the other side of the coin here. It's the same as the women not liking the fact that some men think "It IS your job to cook." See the point now? No one, not women and not men, likes a "what can you do for me?" mentality. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Well that's great. Why does that make you marriage material, especially considering you do not want children? What sets you apart from other women? It is easy for men to have lots of random sex with "career" women. It is much harder to find a woman to marry. What are you talking about? My ex wanted marriage and no kids (as it turned out.) Not all men want kids you know? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 While CommitmentPhobe and I don't always agree on everything, I think I'm starting to fall in love with him in this thread! Link to post Share on other sites
Citizen Erased Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Just import one, I'm sure she'd suit you. :lmao: Funniest thing I've read all year. Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 While CommitmentPhobe and I don't always agree on everything, I think I'm starting to fall in love with him in this thread! Fantastic, are you going to invite me over for a meal? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 Fantastic, are you going to invite me over for a meal? IF you like seafood or wild game, we're on! How about some caribou medallions done with a cognac reduction? I promise to add some real truffles! Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 See the point now? Nope. If I could expect to marry someone and they would care for everything and let me be a house husband I'd go for it, but it will never happen. A marriage is a partnership but not everyone can be the running back or it's a really crappy team if you get my meaning. We all have roles to perform and it just so happens women are still the ones bearing children. Staying home and caring for those you love more than any others doesn't seem like it should be such an onerous chore to me. Furthermore, it worked for most of human history and it is a good fit to our respective physical and emotional makeups. Why fight it so hard? Housewife is a critical and honorable job in my book. Run with it. Link to post Share on other sites
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