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I'm not sure what is happening with this guy ?


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Old 8th August 2017, 2:40 PM   #16
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I asked. I have nothing to lose. I can't handle the torture. His answer should tell me what I need to know hopefully

I said:

"I know you have a crazy week going on, but I was thinking if you had some time we can go get ice cream and walk by the lake, or order Chinese and hangout with a movie? If either of those you would want to do? "

I will see what he says!
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Old 8th August 2017, 2:58 PM   #17
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Good job!

I will watch for your update
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Old 8th August 2017, 3:43 PM   #18
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So he responded:

"Hey! I'm sorry, this week is going to be no bueno. I have stuff going on every night unfortunately."

And he added a serious/sad emoji at the end.
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Old 8th August 2017, 3:44 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amkxoxo View Post
So he responded:

"Hey! I'm sorry, this week is going to be no bueno. I have stuff going on every night unfortunately."

And he added a serious/sad emoji at the end.
He did not offer an alternative? if not then let it be. The ball is in his court. No more chitchatting on your part. Let him get back to you.
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Old 8th August 2017, 3:50 PM   #20
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No, he didn't say anything else or offer an alternative.

How do I respond to that?

"Yes, I understand"

or "Gotcha, good luck"

or "Wow, you did say August was a busy month, you weren't kidding"

or "No worries. Hope the week goes smoothly for you."

??

I don't know if he is genuinely busy or doesn't want to see me. He did tell me on our second date that August was an insane month for his work and that one of the weeks he is going to be working crazy hours. I remember because we were out to dinner and he specifically said "Nights like these probably won't be happening often then."

Meaning early dinner nights. He warned me. I don't know.
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Old 8th August 2017, 3:56 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by amkxoxo View Post
No, he didn't say anything else or offer an alternative.

How do I respond to that?

"Yes, I understand"

or "Gotcha, good luck"

or "Wow, you did say August was a busy month, you weren't kidding"

or "No worries. Hope the week goes smoothly for you."

??

I don't know if he is genuinely busy or doesn't want to see me. He did tell me on our second date that August was an insane month for his work and that one of the weeks he is going to be working crazy hours. I remember because we were out to dinner and he specifically said "Nights like these probably won't be happening often then."

Meaning early dinner nights. He warned me. I don't know.

" Hope the week goes smoothly for you." with a smile.


I would not type No worries.
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Old 8th August 2017, 4:09 PM   #22
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Typed it. Sent it.

I feel like I was searching for an answer as to whether he wants to see me or not in this and I still didn't get it. He could just be super busy with work, or he could just not want to see me anymore. He could be seeing others, going out with the guys, who the heck knows.

He didn't specifically say it was work related. But I knew he had told me his work was getting crazy this week and he even said he was working like 80 hours, so I just assume its work.
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Old 8th August 2017, 4:09 PM   #23
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No way. He'd make time in a week if he was *really* interested. He would follow up with another suggestion if he were remotedly still interested... even a how about next week or some lukewarm bs like that...

That text exchange was very bootycallesque. Sounds like he just lost interest. Cut losses and forget him
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Old 8th August 2017, 4:33 PM   #24
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He responded to my smoothly comment.

He said "Thank you. Its already been hell. I went to the office supply store like half a dozen times."

So thats for his work. He's working.

I'm moving on though. These feelings I have. I felt with my ex. The feeling of them being too busy with work, life, and not feeling important. I hate this feeling. I don't know if I want to feel this way.
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Old 8th August 2017, 4:37 PM   #25
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I stand by my original advice.

Nothing in your opening post indicated that you weren't showing enough interest or doing enough.

In fact, there has been a bit too much hanging out on the couch and falling asleep with your clothes on.
You need to be out doing stuff and having fun with your dates this early on.

And now that he says he is busy a whole week combined with his behaviour since your return - I call BS.
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Old 8th August 2017, 4:56 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amkxoxo View Post
I'm moving on though. These feelings I have. I felt with my ex. The feeling of them being too busy with work, life, and not feeling important. I hate this feeling. I don't know if I want to feel this way.
It's good that you recognize that you don't like the feeling.
Whether his excuse is real or not, you want a man that makes you feel important.
Don't settle
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Old 8th August 2017, 5:03 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amkxoxo View Post
I am unsure. This is exactly what was said

Him: "are you back?"
Me: "I am back"
Him: "Wooo. Then where are you?"
Me: "At my house"
Him: "No, why aren't you here?"
Me: " Someone didn't invite me "
Him: "Uhm well meet me"
Me: "Meet you where?"
Him: "In my room"
Me: "You know that's not how I roll Mister"
Him: "Welp"
Me: "welp what?"
Him: "Thats unfortunate"
Me: "To be honest, I'm really tired from the trip, but I do really want to see you, so how about something tomorrow?"
Him: "Aaaahhhh, I already told the guys I'd go with them."

...

That's how the conversation went. I feel bad. I hope I didn't **** up. I do really like this guy. He's pretty great, other than the recent not seeing me thing. I'm not sure what to do to fix this. I don't want to be clingy or needy. When he was inviting me to his room at 9pm, it felt like a booty call and it made me nervous.

How do I fix this???
I think you handed this perfectly by the way.
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Old 8th August 2017, 5:10 PM   #28
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I smell commitment issues after a (somewhat) hot and heavy start. I have had probably 5 relationships in my life go just like this one where I'm super into someone initially, then it fades quickly either from my side or the other's. Granted most of those were in my 20's.

If someone is really into you; it doesn't matter if they're working 100 hours a week. They will find the time to spend an hour with you and continue "falling asleep together."

I for some reason also get the sense he may hit the sauce a good bit and prefer that to your company. Sorry...it just reads like that. And I've been there too.
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Old 8th August 2017, 6:38 PM   #29
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Should I respond to the last message he sent about work being hell etc... ?
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Old 8th August 2017, 8:45 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amkxoxo View Post
Should I respond to the last message he sent about work being hell etc... ?
Absolutely not.

His reply was not a conversation starter.

It's enough, don't chitchat.
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