Author ConcernedMom Posted March 11, 2017 Author Share Posted March 11, 2017 So the Psychiatrist had the same thought as the therapist he has depression and a touch of anxiety. So he prescribed him Zoloft and Xanax, See how this goes he starts them tomorrow. But before all of that the lunch with her parents and my ex went pretty good well as good as it possibly could go. We are all on the same page and now have a good united front. I didn't tell them any of my thoughts on their daughter and how I don't think she is being very good for my son. But I can't say anything without any hard evidence of her wrongdoing towards my kid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 Hoping these side effects do not last long, he couldn't really keep his eyes open today and didn't seem all that interested in much of anything. And this was simply the first day of them so I am hoping that is all it was. It was also a chore to get him to eat anything. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 I'm worried about your son being on these meds for a situational issue. I take antidepressants and they are nigh near impossible to stop taking. Not sure if Xanax is the same, but you may want to research it. What other options could there be to change the situation? Perhaps taking a break from her and focusing back on mates and school could help him. I know some would argue that he should be there supporting his girlfriend, but I'm a firm believer that to be of any use to anyone, we need to look after our mental health needs first. Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 Hoping these side effects do not last long, he couldn't really keep his eyes open today and didn't seem all that interested in much of anything. And this was simply the first day of them so I am hoping that is all it was. It was also a chore to get him to eat anything. It's not at all unusual to adjust dose/medication when beginning psychotropic treatment. Please remain observant and REPORT to the therapist/psychiatrist any behaviors/side effects that are counterproductive or detrimental. Ask your son how he feels. It's difficult to comment as meds are highly individual and use requires direct supervision from the prescribing provider. Xanax is often used in situational circumstance (as needed) ie...in the case of an anxiety attack, yet otherwise not needed. If you have any concerns, contact your son's psychiatrist, some modification may be necessary. Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 What other options could there be to change the situation? Perhaps taking a break from her and focusing back on mates and school could help him. I know some would argue that he should be there supporting his girlfriend, but I'm a firm believer that to be of any use to anyone, we need to look after our mental health needs first. I agree with this, yet improvement of mental health may lead to him coming to this conclusion on his own, rather than a rebellion against something forced. If you can collaborate with gf's parents for less time together, for reasons XYZ.....mainly as a parent you are very concerned for your son's well being, academics, work, etc...this needs to happen. Ideally, this would occur at the beginning of dating and before impending parenthood. ConcernedMom, if you can draw a hard line in the sand without impeding treatment...therapy has just begun. It may be beneficial to let this pan out a bit. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 I agree with this, yet improvement of mental health may lead to him coming to this conclusion on his own, rather than a rebellion against something forced. If you can collaborate with gf's parents for less time together, for reasons XYZ.....mainly as a parent you are very concerned for your son's well being, academics, work, etc...this needs to happen. Ideally, this would occur at the beginning of dating and before impending parenthood. ConcernedMom, if you can draw a hard line in the sand without impeding treatment...therapy has just begun. It may be beneficial to let this pan out a bit. I would be looking at meds for ongoing mental health issues. But assuming he wasn't depressed and anxious before this, I'm suggesting he take a break from the situation and hopefully he won't need to medicate himself at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 I would be looking at meds for ongoing mental health issues. But assuming he wasn't depressed and anxious before this, I'm suggesting he take a break from the situation and hopefully he won't need to medicate himself at all. None of this has occurred in a vacuum. I don't think that contemplating suicide and getting a 19 yr. old pregnant 'just happened.' I'm assuming this is the result of many years, that's all I want to say about that. OP is taking care of her son now. I'm not a pill popper, more homeopathic as yourself. That said, time is short and this particular situation calls for quick action. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 13, 2017 Author Share Posted March 13, 2017 I have never been alright with pills but my son was spiraling out of control and his mental health was in a nose dive so he needed something. He has only been taking the Zoloft and the xanax is as needed for when he has an anxiety attack which has been happening more and more. This isn't what I wanted for my son but I saw no other options. I will keep in touched with his doctors and the therapist to make sure all of this is in his best interest right now. And I don't really need to worry about making them keep apart she hasn't been the most supportive while he has been going through all of this. And when she finally did come over to check on him earlier today it didn't quite go the way she wanted. But understandable as she chose the second day he was on his meds and well being a zombie and trying to deal with a relationship doesn't quite mix. But I had to make her go as she was trying to tell my son not to take the meds and to flush them good thing I overheard and was able to stop that nonsense. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 Good for you. It's one thing making an informed decision as a mother, but another thing altogether for her to be pushing her beliefs on him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 14, 2017 Author Share Posted March 14, 2017 Talked to his Doctor today and he just was able to reassure me that while his body is adjusting and leveling out to the Zoloft these reactions are pretty common so I am really happy and relieved nothing major is going on. Well I mean nothing else major I suppose, His girlfriend stopped by today but he turned her away it was really surprising to see him not want to talk to her or even see her. I know this relationship probably won't last but I want it to succeed it if brings me son happiness but at the same time if she is a terrible influence on him then I rather it ended now while they aren't too terribly attached emotionally. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 16, 2017 Author Share Posted March 16, 2017 Sorry I didn't update yesterday, Was a rough one as my son was in a severe motorcycle wreck. An older lady wasn't watching what she was doing and where she was going and hit my son when he was on his way to school yesterday morning. So now my kid is in ICU and this person honestly needs charged with something this isn't alright and just isn't acceptable. So I am very angry/worried/stressed. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 16, 2017 Share Posted March 16, 2017 Sorry I didn't update yesterday, Was a rough one as my son was in a severe motorcycle wreck. An older lady wasn't watching what she was doing and where she was going and hit my son when he was on his way to school yesterday morning. So now my kid is in ICU and this person honestly needs charged with something this isn't alright and just isn't acceptable. So I am very angry/worried/stressed. Thoughts and prayers to your son and of course to you and your family. Stay positive my dear. Good thoughts only! Hopefully the police will charge her with careless driving causing bodily harm. Link to post Share on other sites
Whoknew30 Posted March 17, 2017 Share Posted March 17, 2017 Oh mom hang in there! Prayers that your son is ok but if he's been in a wreck & is hurt...they're going to give him pain pills. I worked in both the hospital & the psychiatric ward...when he gets out, you're going to have to monitor extremely close...xanax, antidepressants & pain pills all together, will completely change his personality & bc of his depression, he'll be ripe for dependency on his meds & most Dr's are not knowledgeable with addiction, which can happen extremely quickly. my heart goes out to you & you all get through this! Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 18, 2017 Author Share Posted March 18, 2017 Thank you all, His right leg was shattered and he has a few broken ribs and a concussion along with a collapsed lung and a lot of road rash. He is stable and they are keeping him pretty medicated and keeping him for awhile obviously as he needs a few surgeries to get things sorted. Really surprised his so called girlfriend hasn't bothered to come and see him at all, But her parents have and even brought me some food and brought him some flowers. Ex has been by a lot as well glad to see him actually trying to be involved albeit brought a really bad situation to do so. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 18, 2017 Share Posted March 18, 2017 Thank you all, His right leg was shattered and he has a few broken ribs and a concussion along with a collapsed lung and a lot of road rash. He is stable and they are keeping him pretty medicated and keeping him for awhile obviously as he needs a few surgeries to get things sorted. Really surprised his so called girlfriend hasn't bothered to come and see him at all, But her parents have and even brought me some food and brought him some flowers. Ex has been by a lot as well glad to see him actually trying to be involved albeit brought a really bad situation to do so. Prayers and best wishes for your son ConcernedMom. As for bolded, leave him alone for that, both of you have had 'wake up' calls in the last several months. So no more motorcycle for the 16 yr. old suicidal teenager..... My daughter was dating a young man older than your son who died in a motorcycle accident. Changes...first tap, then punch, then kick, then frying pan...things will be different from now on, right? Best wishes. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefeather Posted March 18, 2017 Share Posted March 18, 2017 I'm really sorry to hear this, but thankful that he is alive and being taken care of. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 19, 2017 Author Share Posted March 19, 2017 Prayers and best wishes for your son ConcernedMom. As for bolded, leave him alone for that, both of you have had 'wake up' calls in the last several months. So no more motorcycle for the 16 yr. old suicidal teenager..... My daughter was dating a young man older than your son who died in a motorcycle accident. Changes...first tap, then punch, then kick, then frying pan...things will be different from now on, right? Best wishes. Are you blaming me for his wreck? Trust me I am already blaming myself for this for letting him have his bike back because I have been busy with work when I am not dealing with his doctors and her parents and the meetings. But yes no more motorcycle as it is totaled, wasn't even my idea for the motorcycle that was his dads brilliant idea. But aside from that things are going alright son woke up for the first time since being airlifted to the hospital first thing he asks where his girlfriend is and I told him she hadn't been buy and the look in his eyes basically said it all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 21, 2017 Author Share Posted March 21, 2017 First surgery was successful in repairing his part of his leg will require a few more surgeries from what his doctor is saying. Besides that not a lot has honestly changed his so called girlfriend whom has swore up and down she loves him hasn't been by at all to visit him or even see him. Not sure what is going on there and really wish I could get an answer out of her parents but so far no luck. But I suppose it is for the best at this point. Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted March 21, 2017 Share Posted March 21, 2017 At this point, you need legal counsel. How far along is gf? As your son is 16, you are on the hook for the legalities of child support. Please consult an attorney regarding paternity testing and child support obligations. One of the reasons to consult legal representation now is to make sure that birth certificate identification is accurate and legally responsible for the child. Your son will probably buck at the process but he has no idea the long term ramifications. It is better for him, her and most importantly the baby that these things are straightened/established regardless of their romantic future. Do not let your son's emotional disposition sway you because this is quite simply the right thing to do for all parties involved. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 22, 2017 Author Share Posted March 22, 2017 My son isn't really in a place mentally or physically to buck at anything I or my ex say, Not to mention his baseball days might be over because of this wreck but I nor have the doctors broke that to him quite yet. He woke up today and immediately asked for his girlfriend though and she still hasn't come by and it is really disheartening for my kid and that piled on with everything else is just, I guess I am just worried it is going to becoming too much for him mentally. She won't answer my phone calls and her parents can't seem to give me a straight answer of where she has been and why she hasn't been by to see him. I am honestly pretty angry about it and getting suspicious of what is going on. I will try and find a family law attorney though, I honestly have doubts that this child is even my sons right now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 22, 2017 Share Posted March 22, 2017 Paternity test has to happen sooner or later. The truth will come out eventually. I hope your son continues to heal and you hang in there. No need to have extra stress right now, if you talk to a lawyer don't mention anything about it to him, he's mentally fragile. Between recovering from his accident and surgery and now the fact his so called gf isn't visiting and has seemed to have disappeared is really bad. Shame on her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 23, 2017 Author Share Posted March 23, 2017 Thank you, I haven't told him about anything not the lawyers or that he might not have a future in baseball as it is looking right now. His so called girlfriend finally showed up to see him today though, Not sure I honestly should of let her in to see him and it just made me angry to see her right now. I mean he was happy to see her at first but when he asked her where she had been and why she hadn't been by sooner to see him and she wouldn't give him any straight answers he got angry and I had no other choice but to force her to leave but I didn't say anything negative to her not gonna do that in front of my son. I also set up an appointment with an attorney for Monday. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 23, 2017 Share Posted March 23, 2017 Good for you. I think you're doing all the right things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConcernedMom Posted March 24, 2017 Author Share Posted March 24, 2017 This young lady is honestly trying to destroy my kid right now it is the only thing making any kind of sense. She called the hospital and was put through to my sons room and I answered because he was being tended to by the hospital staff. And she just wouldn't talk to me so, I finally hand the phone over to my son and about 10mins pass. And he throws it across the room and is at first very very angry and trying to get up out of bed to the point nurses almost sedated him to him just crying. And I finally get him to tell me why he is so upset and he blurts out that she admitted to him she was cheating but only because her parents forced her to and that she was breaking up with him. And that she still swears the child is his although I am about 99.9% sure that is bull**** excuse my french. I don't know why she would do that or why her parents thought it was a good idea but this as you can see has been a very bad day. He has another surgery tomorrow and that will be the final one for awhile. But I will be meeting with a family attorney on Monday. So paternity test really needs to happen now. I doubt I or my son have the full story of what is going on but I don't think he wants or needs to know it right now. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefeather Posted March 24, 2017 Share Posted March 24, 2017 This young lady is honestly trying to destroy my kid right now it is the only thing making any kind of sense. She called the hospital and was put through to my sons room and I answered because he was being tended to by the hospital staff. And she just wouldn't talk to me so, I finally hand the phone over to my son and about 10mins pass. And he throws it across the room and is at first very very angry and trying to get up out of bed to the point nurses almost sedated him to him just crying. And I finally get him to tell me why he is so upset and he blurts out that she admitted to him she was cheating but only because her parents forced her to and that she was breaking up with him. And that she still swears the child is his although I am about 99.9% sure that is bull**** excuse my french. I don't know why she would do that or why her parents thought it was a good idea but this as you can see has been a very bad day. He has another surgery tomorrow and that will be the final one for awhile. But I will be meeting with a family attorney on Monday. So paternity test really needs to happen now. I doubt I or my son have the full story of what is going on but I don't think he wants or needs to know it right now. That sounds like a blessing in disguise. I seriously applaud that girl's parents for making her tell your son the truth and basically forcing her out of your son's life. She sounds like really bad news and he might have just dodged a bullet. Yes, get that paternity test done! You and him need to know for sure about that and go from there, but that girl who obviously broke his heart is now on her way out of his life, and that sounds like it's for the best right now. I believe your son needs you now more than ever. Please just continue to be there for him. My heart truly goes out to you and your son. Wishing him much healing! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts