AverageJoe1986 Posted January 26, 2016 Posted January 26, 2016 If it's at all reassuring to you, I once had the mega hots for a guy I met in real life but had actually seen online and hadn't noticed before. I wasn't trying to judge him or anything like that but I was attracted to him because he had a good sense of humour and was a good flirt (even though he wasn't particularly photogenic - not ugly, just not photogenic). I'm not trying to imply anything about your looks or personality but I sometimes think online dating can stop people from seeing all of your potential. All my long term boyfriends weren't guys who would have gotten tonnes of attention online but I liked them. Yeah, I just posted on another thread that I have no doubt that none of my ex-partners would have given me the time of day on a dating site. That's why I'm giving up on it. There is an argument that it's just another option so why cut it off, but it's just so demoralising that you begin to identify your self-worth with it. My problem persist though. Not only do I not ever meet people with similar interests but I have virtually no free time. I work nights and all the rest of the week I look after my daughter.
thecrucible Posted January 26, 2016 Posted January 26, 2016 My problem persist though. Not only do I not ever meet people with similar interests but I have virtually no free time. I work nights and all the rest of the week I look after my daughter. I don't have children myself but I can totally appreciate the lack of time and the attendant lack of flexibility in planning means you aren't as able to make spontaneous decisions and end up in more places to meet people. Then of course if you work nights, it eats into your social time. I have lack of time in a different sense in that I live in a rural town and you have to travel to anywhere worth going to which means spending money and I am time limited by travel restrictions (I don't drive yet) and have to be up for work in the morning. Then I work on Saturdays so that cuts off some of my weekend.
Robratory Posted January 26, 2016 Posted January 26, 2016 (edited) Ok, here's a find, courtesy of Craigslist. Hey!! Im looking for somone that is 25-35 and it height and weight proportioned. A little bit about myself is I'm 33 years old, I have a 2 boys, I'm 5'2, 155lbs, Hrmmm, weight proportioned? Honey, your BMI is 28.3 and clinical obesity starts at 30.0. You're insisting on weight proportioned? Why would a "weight proportioned" man of 35 want to get involved with a fat-ass like you with two kids? Here's a tip from Planet Reality -- be open to guys up to 50 years old. You'll find lots of guys who missed the Dad boat and now want to make up for lost time. They're looking for ready-made families. They'll make excellent husbands and fathers, even if they're chubby like you. Edited January 26, 2016 by Robratory 1
AverageJoe1986 Posted January 26, 2016 Posted January 26, 2016 I don't have children myself but I can totally appreciate the lack of time and the attendant lack of flexibility in planning means you aren't as able to make spontaneous decisions and end up in more places to meet people. Then of course if you work nights, it eats into your social time. I have lack of time in a different sense in that I live in a rural town and you have to travel to anywhere worth going to which means spending money and I am time limited by travel restrictions (I don't drive yet) and have to be up for work in the morning. Then I work on Saturdays so that cuts off some of my weekend. Yes I can see how that would be hard. I live in a largish town and I'm only 25 miles from London so theoretically I could strecth to there (though it's probably not a good idea as I can't move from my daughter or ever afford to live in London anyway).
Author Michelle ma Belle Posted January 27, 2016 Author Posted January 27, 2016 Okay...so it would appear there is an influx of men online all sporting 9-10 inch...umm...wedding tackle :/ Who knew 10 inches is now the new norm?!?! And WHY these men feel the need to inform me of it...I have no idea. God help us all. 2
jen1447 Posted January 27, 2016 Posted January 27, 2016 Okay...so it would appear there is an influx of men online all sporting 9-10 inch...umm...wedding tackle :/ Who knew 10 inches is now the new norm?!?! And WHY these men feel the need to inform me of it...I have no idea. God help us all. Perfectly normal ....that's the LS average too. 2
SolG Posted January 27, 2016 Posted January 27, 2016 Okay...so it would appear there is an influx of men online all sporting 9-10 inch...umm...wedding tackle :/ Who knew 10 inches is now the new norm?!?! And WHY these men feel the need to inform me of it...I have no idea. God help us all. I came across a profile on Zoosk where the only piece of info listed was.. 9". That's it. Actually made me lol :-D So of course I sent him a chat request. Because I'm really curious to ask him how much interest he gets with only that listed. If he sccepts I'll let you know what he says. And my Tinderliscious message of the day... 'I want to treat you like my big toe and bang you on every piece of furniture in my house. DTF?' My response... 'Yes, I am absolutely DTF. But not with you, With you, due to stupidity, I am DTU.. down to unmatch Have a nice day! :-D'
Author Michelle ma Belle Posted January 27, 2016 Author Posted January 27, 2016 I came across a profile on Zoosk where the only piece of info listed was.. 9". That's it. Actually made me lol :-D So of course I sent him a chat request. Because I'm really curious to ask him how much interest he gets with only that listed. If he sccepts I'll let you know what he says. And my Tinderliscious message of the day... 'I want to treat you like my big toe and bang you on every piece of furniture in my house. DTF?' My response... 'Yes, I am absolutely DTF. But not with you, With you, due to stupidity, I am DTU.. down to unmatch Have a nice day! :-D' Oh my goodness SolG this post made me laugh out loud!! Brilliant response and do keep us posted on any developments with Mr. Big
risjurad Posted January 27, 2016 Posted January 27, 2016 hey if it's like chat roulette, you can click off instantly. it's still less of a time-waster than trying to discern some person hiding behind text. I seriously don't understand how this OLD system is so popular and why people put up with such bs... "chatting" is just a huge waste of time. If I ever got on those dating sites, I would chat for probably a few minutes and then just ask for her number or if they wanted to cam chat. just cut to the good stuff man, textual communication is so cold and anonymous, and IMO excessive chatting is very cowardly. I started OLD recently. When there were back and forth conversations, I would ask if she wanted to meet up by the 3rd exchange of messages. No responses. Those were more of a loss for me since those were local people. Otherwise, I'm in a remote area, and the next town over that has any size is 1.5 hours away (which I don't mind driving to, but they may).
TheArtist Posted January 27, 2016 Posted January 27, 2016 I found a profile today that simply read, 'Must be Scottish'. She was nowhere near Scotland, is she looking for a lost love? Maybe she meant, 'Must be driving to Scotland and have a spare seat in the car'. 2
thecrucible Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 In my dating profile, I make a brief reference to my work sector. Every time I get asked "which ___ do you work in?". I know they are only being curious but I don't really want the possibility of someone I don't even know turning up randomly at reception where I work. Then I get people asking if I'm Italian because I have dark features ("No sorry to disappoint you"). I got some nice genuine messages yesterday so I'm going to reply and see how that goes. Or I may delete my profile. I recently put on circa 20lbs due to stress over the past 6 months so my dating pictures are well, kind of inaccurate although my general figure is the same. I don't really want to fool anyone so I may tell the people I'm messaging that I'm taking a break to get fit again. To make myself feel better, I started a new gym regime this week and I'm trying my best not to overindulge and get lots of protein. I've also managed to get good sleep for the past few nights which is great as I've been getting night terrors for the past 2 months. I'm trying to think outside of the box about meeting men and I might join some meetups or plan to make trips to the nearest when I can. I'm currently mulling over speed dating but I'm uncertain. Has anyone here tried it?
thecrucible Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 I found a profile today that simply read, 'Must be Scottish'. She was nowhere near Scotland, is she looking for a lost love? Maybe she meant, 'Must be driving to Scotland and have a spare seat in the car'. haha that's so bizarre! It sounds pretty ridiculous but some people are quite tribal. I'm English but I have lived in Scotland for a long time and I've noticed this myself. That kind of thing would put me off if I saw it. I see people as people not by their nationality. 1
TheArtist Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 To make myself feel better, I started a new gym regime this week... That's good! Exercise is a great boost! Keep it up! I'm trying to think outside of the box about meeting men and I might join some meetups or plan to make trips to the nearest when I can. I'm currently mulling over speed dating but I'm uncertain. Has anyone here tried it? I did book onto the only speed dating event I've ever seen advertised in my area but it was eventually cancelled due to the complete lack of females. That could have been quite an awkward evening... I think you should start a new thread on the speed dating, I don't think I've seen one of those on here and it could be quite interesting.
CTRL C Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 Tried Tinder for a very short time, just to see what it's about. Matched with a pretty attractive, outdoorsy type guy. His first message "Tinder says we'd make beautiful babies but I think we need to do dinner first!" and at the same time. A little outlandish of an intro for a first attempt at OLD lol. 1
bluefeather Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 Tried Tinder for a very short time, just to see what it's about. Matched with a pretty attractive, outdoorsy type guy. His first message "Tinder says we'd make beautiful babies but I think we need to do dinner first!" and at the same time. A little outlandish of an intro for a first attempt at OLD lol. That sounded pretty clever to me, actually. haha 3
thecrucible Posted January 29, 2016 Posted January 29, 2016 think you should start a new thread on the speed dating, I don't think I've seen one of those on here and it could be quite interesting. Hey . Thanks for the encouragement. I will definitely start a thread on it if I book on. I am trying to persuade a friend to come with me for support but I think it's the kind of thing I'll do by myself. But I'd have to travel to the nearest city to go to one so that means forking out 20 quid for travel plus the cost of the ticket. Hmmm...I shall have to give it some thought. But I really do need to put myself out there. I was with my mate the other night and we bumped into one of my exes. We all had a drink together and it was cool and not awkward. I still kind of fancy him but I know it'd be wrong to go there again. Another of my exes has made a new Facebook profile and readded me after I blocked him but I really don't want to accept. I just logged onto online dating and I have some 250 messages left to reply to but some of them are months old (I kind of just didn't bother logging into okcupid for ages). Should I reply to them or just delete everything from inbox and start from scratch?
hasaquestion Posted January 29, 2016 Posted January 29, 2016 Well, I made an OK Cupid profile. Time to find out what all this fuss is about.
AMJ Posted January 29, 2016 Posted January 29, 2016 I talked to a guy on EHarmony for three months. He was soooo excited to go out with me, and kept talking about how he was going to take me on a "hot date" and show me off around town. Well, I drive an hour to meet him- the farthest I've ever driven to meet a blind date. He had to drive an hour too, so it seemed fair enough. He shows up wearing a Game of Thrones t-shirt. I'm wearing a dress and probably spent plenty of time trying to look nice, even though after work on a Monday I'd also rather be wearing a giant t-shirt. Anyway the conversation was mediocre at best. When the bill comes, I offer to pay, and he lets me! I'm thinking, this is your idea of a hot date? I bought myself two drinks and a sandwich, and you couldn't even be bothered to put on a decent shirt. Guys, please, wear something decent when you meet a woman for the first time. In our minds, we're thinking this is the hardest you are ever going to try to impress us, so put a little bit of effort into it, please. He was so surprised that I didn't want to go out with him again. He kept texting and asked what went wrong. I don't know how guys had better sense in their early 20s than they do now. Wearing a decent shirt and buying a woman dinner is a very basic thing to do on a first date. Just do it! Please! 3
hasaquestion Posted January 29, 2016 Posted January 29, 2016 Day 1 of OK Cupid experiment underway. Five profile "visits" so far. One message but it looks like it's from some kind of robot. I messaged one of the people who visited and told her that she sounds more chill than a streaker in an igloo guarded by polar bears. Will report back if response.
Shining One Posted January 29, 2016 Posted January 29, 2016 He shows up wearing a Game of Thrones t-shirt. I'm wearing a dress and probably spent plenty of time trying to look nice, even though after work on a Monday I'd also rather be wearing a giant t-shirt. Anyway the conversation was mediocre at best. When the bill comes, I offer to pay, and he lets me!I'm with you on the t-shirt, but you shouldn't offer to pay if you have no actual desire to pay or plan to hold it against him if he accepts. 1
AMJ Posted January 30, 2016 Posted January 30, 2016 I'm with you on the t-shirt, but you shouldn't offer to pay if you have no actual desire to pay or plan to hold it against him if he accepts. I went on a first date last night and paid my half willingly. We had a good time and I didn't mind paying. I'm a big girl, I can buy my own drinks. The point was, this guy went on for literally MONTHS expressing his excitement to take me out, take me on a "hot date". In my mind, taking a woman out on a special date includes buying her dinner, especially when she drives an hour to meet you at the end of her workday.
AMJ Posted January 30, 2016 Posted January 30, 2016 This is an actual OLD conversation: Him- Give me a chance to woo you. Me- I can do that. Him- My pitch: I'm downright too nice for my own good. Looking for someone I can spoil. Me- That's a start. Him- Where's the finish? Me- I'll let you know when you get there. Him-Seems worth the wait. Me- There's only one way to find out! I'll bet anyone $20 that this is as deep as this conversation ever goes. Why do men throw out cheesy lines like this?
bluefeather Posted January 31, 2016 Posted January 31, 2016 This is an actual OLD conversation: Him- Give me a chance to woo you. Me- I can do that. Him- My pitch: I'm downright too nice for my own good. Looking for someone I can spoil. Me- That's a start. Him- Where's the finish? Me- I'll let you know when you get there. Him-Seems worth the wait. Me- There's only one way to find out! I'll bet anyone $20 that this is as deep as this conversation ever goes. Why do men throw out cheesy lines like this? Sounds like he got lost after you said "that's a start." laughable
thecrucible Posted January 31, 2016 Posted January 31, 2016 I just got a message from a couple looking for fun, wanting me to join a ménage á trois. Eurgh online dating is so depressing. Okcupid should ban this kind of thing from their site. I mean it's their prerogative if that's what they're looking for but it's such a waste of my time to get messages like this. 1
hasaquestion Posted January 31, 2016 Posted January 31, 2016 No response from igloo girl. Having an in-depth discussion about different kinds of dinosaurs with someone else though. Lives 4 miles away, need to figure out how I'm gonna ask her out for drinks.
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