Author djones Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 HEy nikkicam71, Yeah you are right I just have to let it go, I just feel real sad about it and just the whole situation....I just wish I would know if she is the one for me, or who ever she is....Today I am feeling low, alone and sad....Yeah I tried to convice her and it did not go anywhere....I have to move forward.....you know still wondering if "if its meant to be, it will be" ...right now I am i feel that I am alone and it bothers me right now...I know you all are going through this too....this sucks Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 drjones, Go and spoil yourself!.... Go out.. .and buy that one thing you've been wanting and think you shouldn't buy. Hey... I did it... I went out and just committed myself to a $50k car. and well...... gosh.... it's great! Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Hey WantanS4, Thanks thats great idea, you are right i need to spoil myself..I have beein in a rut for a while .......I need to get myself back and be happy again...hehe Its funny I do need a car my car is 11 years old....and I always wanted a Porsche Boxster!....I will try to spoil myself some how...Have fun with your new car!! enjoy it...p?s what car did you get? Link to post Share on other sites
kodiak Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 drjones- Hey my brother sorry I was really busy at work the last couple days so I did not get a chance to write. Im glad to hear that you are doing better these days. I have been hanging in there too. Its been kinda tough and I dont know why. I miss her still so much. I am going to put a end to that girl Im seeing. She is a great girl, but its just not fair to her. I truly have nothing to give to her and I can pretend that I have feelings for her. I just need time right now to sort my own stuff out and get over my ex completely. I still havnt wrote the letter but im going to tomorrow, i promised my self I would do that. You said that you talked to your ex the other day, how did that go? I think you said that she called you right? Anyways although she doesnt want you back right now, its a goodting that she called you. It might me nothing but it confirms that fact that she was atleast thinking of you. Anyways I would love to have my ex call me, its been over a month since she called last. I sent her a text saying hi and hope things are well and she never replied. She usually does, so I really think she is upset about the incident i told you about in my previous post. Who knows?? Well my brother, keep me posted with things and keep fighting...............Kodiak Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Hey Kodiak, Yeah she called me but it does not look too good, she called and I told her I wanted her back and she just wanted to be friends, I said thats fine, but it hurts to know that you have someone now....she said if I did not want to talk to her then thats ok, I told her no thats fine we can chat or e-mail...but I think she is not going to talk to me anymore, I think I really pushed her away and I did sent her a e-maill telling her that I am sorry for pushing her to get back with me...she did not reply and I have seen her on MSN twice since then...I so think she will not talk to me again...So think I screwed up any chance I had with her....I feel real bad....I guess I dont have a chance anymore...the talk was soo good we talked for like 2 hours then I Fu@ked it up by asking her to get back and that snapped it...Kodiak I dont know what to do...I mom said just leave her alone, she knows how you feel and if she wants you she will contact you...so the no contact is on.......man I feel real down now Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Kodiak, Sorry about the girl, yeah I know how you are feeling, I cant see anyone now...it hurts too much...at least you are honest with her you never know maybe later when you feel better you guys can try it again... Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Fellas... ESPECIALLY FELLAS........ bottomline is..... and will always be....... WOMEN ARE OUT OF THEIR F.UCKING MINDS...... THEY"RE CRAZY!!! CRAZZZYYYY!!!!!!!!!! here we are.... three absolutely NICE guys.... letting our hearts BLEED down a drain for 3 selfish/mixed up/dumb/lost women........ when there are women out there... NO DOUBT BETTER LOOKING... MORE CONCRETE..... AND IN NEED OF LOVE........ you know... i loved her..... i really did... i cared for her... I LOVED HER FOR ALL HER NEGATIVES...... but i've tired... i'm over that hill... yes i still think of her... and yes i miss her... but does she give a f.uck?!!? NO!... why??? CAUSE SHE"S A F.UCKING IDIOT. JUst wait... just wait... one of these days they're gonna ram their heads into the wall of LIFE...and then...... they're come running back.... begging pleading crying just like we did to take them back... but you know what.... we won't... because we'll realize that those people... WE BEGGED THEM NOT TOO... made all these mistakes.... why do you want a malfunctioning piece? Why? It's OVER... SHE'S GONE... she didn't make the 'cut'.... she quit the team....... why do you want her on your team? She could cost you the game of life. F.UCK'M........ F.UCK all of them..... every one of you women who don't APPRECIATE the good guys.... the hell with you...... go look for a dog to love you... cause we sure won't................. I say that will the utmost respect........ Link to post Share on other sites
kodiak Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 drjones- Look my brother, im not trying to make you feel better by saying this or give you false hope. However nothing in life is written in stone. You have been broken up for two months and some change and I have been for three months now. When you think about it, it is not a very long time. Things could come around for you. I do say that you should not ask her back again when you guys talk next, and im sure you will. It puts too much pressure on them and thats why they snap. You see if she could care less about you it would not effect her that much when you asked her back. She might be fighting her own feelings right now, you dont know. Do you??? How long have you gone with no contact? Seriously give it a try. Maybe tell her that you cant talk to her right now and see in a couple weeks or a month she calls you. Dont worry about the other person in her life. If you were good to her and treated her right then she will see that eventually. After a few months is when a new relationship will either go somewhere or not, you have to wait it out and see. I feel good that I know my relationship was pretty good with my ex and we were so close and comfortable around each other. That is something you dont find in everyone. I know that in all my relationships my ex was the first I was that close too. The same thing is true with them. What makes you think that this new person is going to be better than you are for her. It will be different but not necessarily better. You know what i mean. I know its hard drjones. I have been having a miss my ex day bigtime today. I wanna call her but i did the other day so she knows that I have been trying to reach out to her. Like you told me the ball is in her court. There is a new thread under second chances you should read, it will give you a smile and make you feel better. I will be around most of the night so if you need help just write me...Kodiak Link to post Share on other sites
kodiak Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 drjones- The post under second chances is "There is always hope" and "something that may help you, it helped me" The person who wrote those is very good. Read them and let me know what you think. Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Kodiak, Thanks so much man, you made me feel better right now after reading your post....you right the ball is in her court now she knows how I feel about her and maybe a month or whatever she may call...we will see....thanks again...I will read that post...I will be on tongiht as well I am doing some work on the computer....I felt real bad yesterday after this blew up,,,I know that she knows I am real adimant abotu my feelings so she, may not be angry with me...but just doign thsi for my own good....so we will see....take care buddy...thanks again Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 13, 2004 Author Share Posted September 13, 2004 Hey WantanS4, Nice Rant....I think you were about due to rant!!! I have not seen you rant in a long time!!! good to see.... Link to post Share on other sites
LexiB Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 Hey guys Check out the lyrics to "Dare You to Move" by Switchfoot. Theyve been a pretty good motivator for me to get off my butt and stop moping over my lost love. Soooo many ppl know what ive been going thru all summer and like the song says in one part, "everybodys watching you now, everybody waits for you now. what happens next? what happens next?" So what does happen next? We cant allow our crappy situations to permanately wreck us. I think for most on this post, they already ruined our summer (def. my worst EVER). I dare all of us to move past this situation. what would be be doing now if we had not just had our hearts broken--if for all the timewewere going out w our exes up until now we had been single? Do whatever you have to do to get on w ur life. For me it meant ME actually telling HIM I needed a break from the "lets just be friends" routine. Love hearing his voice and spending time w him but knew Icouldnt be clse to him in a platonic way while I still have such strong feelings for him. The deadly cycle of False Hope and dissappointing expectations wld just never end and I that,I absolutely can not take any more. Its too hard on my heart. But a plea for those who feel they can handle just having "casual" talk w/ their ex right now, and even for myself in a few weeks: for sanity's sake, PLEASE lets stop trying to analyse what our exes say and do or what they may be thinking abt something we say or do to them!! Let that be their problem. If they feel hurt by something, let them be mature enough to come to us abt their feelings--the way we've done in vain sooo many times w them. You end up spending so much time trying to figure out how you should be around them when all you should be is yourself and whatever happens, happens. Our exes fell in love w us for who we are and it was natural. So why should we exhaust so much effort trying to act in "just the right way" or to say "just the right thing" that we think is gonna draw them back to us? Theres no such thing. If he/she is gonna come back for a relationship of any worth, its gotta be natural not thru strategic/calculated movements on our part (after almost 3 months Im just realising this, lol). Good luck to you all Little remnants of pain will probably linger with us for several months tocome but the ball is always in our OWN court when it comes to happiness. Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 13, 2004 Author Share Posted September 13, 2004 HEy LexiB, Thanks for yoru post, I makes so much sence, yeah this was my worst summer ever as well. Yeah you are right I going to start not trying to read into what my ex says to me if she calls me of e-mails, she knows how I feel about her so let her come out and say if she has feelings for me....I am getting my life in order for the first time and I am taking care of me now....if we get back togetehr then great if not I just have to move forward which I am trying to do now....its hard but we are all going through it right now...I have been listening to Don Henley album: "the end of the innocence"....its been helping me get through heartbreak.... Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 Depeche Mode - In your room..... This is what's going on in my head.... In your room Where time stands still Or moves at your will Will you let the morning come soon Or will you leave me lying here In your favourite darkness Your favourite half-light Your favourite consciousness Your favourite slave In your room Where souls disappear Only you exist here Will you lead me to your armchair Or leave me lying here Your favourite innocence Your favourite prize Your favourite smile Your favourite slave I’m hanging on your words Living on your breath Feeling with your skin Will I always be here In your room Your burning eyes Cause flames to arise Will you let the fire die down soon Or will I always be here Your favourite passion Your favourite game Your favourite mirror Your favourite slave I’m hanging on your words Living on your breath Feeling with your skin Will I always be here Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 Thinking about it...... out of the three of us... Kodiak... drjones... and WantanS4.... one of our dumb EXs has to come back. We're taking bets now...... Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 13, 2004 Author Share Posted September 13, 2004 Hey Wantans4, Thats a wicked song!! I have not heard that in ages, I need to play that one today...hehe I dont know....I have no luck so maybe bet on you guys!! Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 Seriously.... it's 'da' best!' yea.... see... that's the thing.... my ex SWEARS she's 'better' than me..... but she doesn't realize i have more 'culture' and 'class' in my left butt cheek than she does in her entire body................ TIME WILL TELL Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 13, 2004 Author Share Posted September 13, 2004 yeah time will tell for all of us.....FYI have that tune cranked up in your car!! Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 My friend.... I already did! Just like U2 - With or without you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 14, 2004 Author Share Posted September 14, 2004 hey Kodiak, How are you doing man? I am doing good. I have been getting my life organized, so its been a little steps for me but I am doing it. Other than that I am tring to keep my self busy and make myself better...drop me a line when you can take care Link to post Share on other sites
kodiak Posted September 14, 2004 Share Posted September 14, 2004 drjones- Hey my brother im glad to hear that you are doing well and getting your life organized. This will only make you more attractive to someone new and especially your ex if she decides to comeback. Keep that going. Its important. Im doing ok. Yesterday was a really hard day for some reason. It felt like i had just got dumped all over again and I woke up in the middle of the night after having yet another dream that we got back together. I havnt heard from her in awhile now so I kinda figured that she has forget about me. I sent her a text explaining the text i sent by mistake about being in her town the other day but I got no reply. It hurts but I guess thats all part of it. I mean I just want to have a casual friendship with her and have her still know that shes part of my life, i guess thats not important to her right now. I mean drjones the last time we talked it was so great, I thought for sure we would talk again. I guess not. Anyways thats it for me just taking each day as it comes. I ran into a friend of mine the other day and he asked how my girlfriend was(didnt know we broke up). Anyways I explained the story to him and he told me something very interested. He said "that if there was really love, I mean true love, to take a step back let it all go and it will work itself back. But if there wasnt love just more fatuation and puppy love than it will be better for you in the long run" It makes sense and I truly feel that there was true love with me and my ex and that she did love me. Who knows? Maybe Im wrong, only the future will tell.........Keep up the good work drjones and keep in touch......Kodiak Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 14, 2004 Author Share Posted September 14, 2004 HEy Kodiak, Hang in there too, i know exactly what you are going through I still have my sleepness nights...Actually its become a routine now for me, and yes I do wake up from dreams like yours. I tell you I wake up in the middle of the night and play my CD player for about an hour and go back to sleep...I have been listening to Don Henley: end of the inosence album...its crazy...I got to the point where I just dont question but just do it. You know what you firend said was so cool, I hope its ture and it happens to both of us. I would just do what we have been doing, the ball is in her court now, just keep going and if she is ready she will call you back....I am doing the same thing, I know its hard, man but we both have done all we could and like you said only time will tell and heal our hearts....I dont know whats in store for us, but God I wish I did know, I still have that little candle lit in my heart for her, but I have to fix myself first, and I am doing that right now.....you take care.. Link to post Share on other sites
kodiak Posted September 15, 2004 Share Posted September 15, 2004 drjones- Well my brother I actually wrote the letter tonight. i went over to my parents house and typed it out. It was a very hard hard night. I cried while writting it and it hurt so bad. Yesterday and today have been totally crappy for me and I dont know why. I have taken a step back, but I guess that happens once in awhile. I miss her so much still that I feel like nothing in this world can make me happy. I know thats not true but its just the way I feel right now. I just feel as if my ex hates me and totally forgot about me. I find it hard to beleive because we had a pretty bitchin relationship most of the time. We were so very close man, so close. Its hard to describe it to people because they dont understand how in ten months you can get that close. Anyways I wrote the letter and I plan on mailing it out today, who knows. I was doing fine after writting it but then i had to dig through my stuff that she sent me to get her adress. I found this card she gave me with hearts all over it and I lost it. I sat there holding it and cried my eyes out. I wish I could just go a day and not miss her and have a night were I dont dream about her. I would do anything for that. well its been crappy but its gotta get better. Loosing love is very hard and I just hope that something good comes out of it. I know it will but its hard to see it right now. I can honestly say that not a day has gone by in three months that I have lost even the tinest amount of love for her. I miss her with all my heart. I just wish that she would call me so I know that she still cares or that she thinks about me from time to time. I dont knwo why she hasnt but Im sure she has her reasons.Well my brother its three in the morning and hopefully i can get some sleep. I just hope that tomorrow I will feel better... Take Care..Kodiak Link to post Share on other sites
Author djones Posted September 15, 2004 Author Share Posted September 15, 2004 Hey Kodiak, I know what you are going through, I have thouse relapses back too...I glad that you worte the letter, just maill it off, you just say to your self that You have done everything and she knows how you feel and the ball is in her court you dont have to contact her...she has to do that now....Its soo hard but you are doing fine...I am glad that we can help each other out like this, I wish it was for better reasons, I hope we both get some happiness soon....I know about the cards and little reminders of your ex, I get them most of the time too, everywhere I go I seem to get a little reminder of her, ie things that she likes flowers, the car she likes (likes hummers,,,which are rare where i live, but seems to pop up now)......well you take care.... Link to post Share on other sites
kodiak Posted September 15, 2004 Share Posted September 15, 2004 drjones- Thanks for the reply my brother. I dont know why it has been so hard the last couple days. Ofcourse i had another dream last night about her. I mean when will these stop? I never had dreams about my exes in the past. If I did I never would feel so crappy like this. I just dont know what to do. I wanna call her but I know that I cant right now. Each day is like a task to get through and trying to make yourself happy is sometimes even harder. I guess we just have to keep fighting and stay strong. Try to remember that there are many people that love us out there, ie..family,friends. And there are many available girls that im sure would love us too. when is the last time you talked to your ex? Also what was the age difference with you too, i was jsut curious? Take care........kodiak Link to post Share on other sites
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