Author Thorgs Posted July 28, 2010 Author Share Posted July 28, 2010 Hang in there, we all have the fake smile these days Yep, not hurting as much as when poo first hit the fan but it's still there. Link to post Share on other sites
lunita Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Ha ha. You said "poo." Awesome. Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Thanks, although behind this smile is a hurting man. :/ you my friend are on the path to success - dont let anyone or anything get you - and stopr watching OPRAH....lol... the key is to keep on smiling, because if you do it for long enough, the pain subsides... hey at least you can feign a smile - i have trouble doing even that most day but as someone once said WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS... be strong buddy - life has a way of working out... learn the lessons that need to be learnt form this and make yourself stronger... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 28, 2010 Author Share Posted July 28, 2010 Well she remembered my email. What the **** happened to me this morning!!!!! I'm so in shock and confused right now!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm not going to post what happened though because its too mind blowing NC - Day 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Well she remembered my email. What the **** happened to me this morning!!!!! I'm so in shock and confused right now!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm not going to post what happened though because its too mind blowing NC - Day 1 hey buddy, let the shock out, let the confusion out and think of only one thing - The Chubby Ninja - that should be your focus or you can focus on "Is it a bird? Is it- Oh. It's Koala Man. Asleep in the branches again, and probably pissed. What an embarrassment to superhero-kind." - Sleeptalkinman - dude laugh it off and leave it at that. I am guessing it wasnt what you were hoping and hence it f****d you up but hey it happens... sometimes these random strange events take place. i got the txt last night, had a dream that she was really ill and guess what today she calls in sick to work. Random you tell me - worth pondering till my head becomes numb - NO... well done on getting back to NC - but just make sure you dont lose your focus which should always be you... we are here for you buddy... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 28, 2010 Author Share Posted July 28, 2010 Here I am, heart racing a zillion miles per hour...about to meet her and the girls for lunch, AHHHHHHH so nervous! Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Here I am, heart racing a zillion miles per hour...about to meet her and the girls for lunch, AHHHHHHH so nervous! Ok... Bonne chance... Am gonna be around for a while if you wanna talk later on... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 28, 2010 Author Share Posted July 28, 2010 Ok... Bonne chance... Am gonna be around for a while if you wanna talk later on... Thanks man, got a facebook? I don't know why my PM's don't work, I'll put the link in my profile on here and delete it after you find me. Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Thanks man, got a facebook? I don't know why my PM's don't work, I'll put the link in my profile on here and delete it after you find me. yeah am on FB - try and send me a PM - i tried sending one to you it doesnt work... Link to post Share on other sites
northstar1 Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Thorgs has to be an established member for the PM function, normally is a month or certain number of posts to be upgraded to established status. Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 yeah am on FB - try and send me a PM - i tried sending one to you it doesnt work... just added you Link to post Share on other sites
PixieStix Posted July 28, 2010 Share Posted July 28, 2010 Here I am, heart racing a zillion miles per hour...about to meet her and the girls for lunch, AHHHHHHH so nervous! Hope it went well for you. Any signs from her? I had a call today from my ex saying "Thank you for being uhm well, I know it has to be hard for you. Thank you for -" Mumbling around about something about how well I was taking it all and how nice I was being to him. Geez whatever, I suppose I was am suppose to wither up and die and he did not get the reaction he was looking for. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 29, 2010 Author Share Posted July 29, 2010 Hope it went well for you. Any signs from her? I had a call today from my ex saying "Thank you for being uhm well, I know it has to be hard for you. Thank you for -" Mumbling around about something about how well I was taking it all and how nice I was being to him. Geez whatever, I suppose I was am suppose to wither up and die and he did not get the reaction he was looking for. I'm seriously confused as hell right now. Link to post Share on other sites
PixieStix Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 I'm seriously confused as hell right now. That makes two of us - confused. I am here if you ever want to talk. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 30, 2010 Author Share Posted July 30, 2010 That makes two of us - confused. I am here if you ever want to talk. Thanks PixieStix. Just an update on my situation: This week has been one for the record books. I've done almost everything against LS advice, but for some reason I feel at peace. Struggling through the 2 weeks of NC helped though. Writing a letter helped as well. Well, I got a call tonight from my ex after I was jogging and came upon her and her ex husband fighting in a random parking lot (I just ran past them...but my mind was going crazy like, WTF!!!!). Hung out with her and her girls for a few hours. It was amazing, even though we aren't getting back together. We got to talk and we did it openly. I hope I don't relapse, but right now I'm feeling great. We didn't do anything "naughty" either even though there was a strong sexual tension that we both addressed. I'm blessed that she is in my life...even though it's not every day. If it was every day, then my heart might as well just burst at the seams. Watch for me in a couple days...I might fall back into a dark place, but I'm praying that I'm wont. Thank you everyone for your input and advice. Emotions eventually plateau and when that happens you will know. You will feel it in your core. I have learned a lot about myself in these short four weeks. I had a lot of insecurities and have found that with just a little bit of exercise and pushing yourself without giving up that these can easily be overcome and left in the dust. If you are feeling down, remember it's only you who can kick yourself in the rear to get back on top. We decide if we are happy, we decide if we are sad. If you can learn to control this then you can react to any situation as you wish. We can pave our own path. Link to post Share on other sites
PixieStix Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Thanks PixieStix. Just an update on my situation: This week has been one for the record books. I've done almost everything against LS advice, but for some reason I feel at peace. Struggling through the 2 weeks of NC helped though. Writing a letter helped as well. Well, I got a call tonight from my ex after I was jogging and came upon her and her ex husband fighting in a random parking lot (I just ran past them...but my mind was going crazy like, WTF!!!!). Hung out with her and her girls for a few hours. It was amazing, even though we aren't getting back together. We got to talk and we did it openly. I hope I don't relapse, but right now I'm feeling great. We didn't do anything "naughty" either even though there was a strong sexual tension that we both addressed. I'm blessed that she is in my life...even though it's not every day. If it was every day, then my heart might as well just burst at the seams. Watch for me in a couple days...I might fall back into a dark place, but I'm praying that I'm wont. Thank you everyone for your input and advice. Emotions eventually plateau and when that happens you will know. You will feel it in your core. I have learned a lot about myself in these short four weeks. I had a lot of insecurities and have found that with just a little bit of exercise and pushing yourself without giving up that these can easily be overcome and left in the dust. If you are feeling down, remember it's only you who can kick yourself in the rear to get back on top. We decide if we are happy, we decide if we are sad. If you can learn to control this then you can react to any situation as you wish. We can pave our own path. Good to hear you are at peace with things, that is all that matters! Lets hope you never go back to the dark place, its no fun. I think it always feels better when you can at least be friends and have some sort of connection with them when its over. As for me, this weekend is going to really suck and I have to pretend that it doesn't. I have to watch what was my life move the rest of his things out to go start his new life with what he loves and appears to make him happy. I think what hurts the most is that it only took him a whole 2 weeks. Just makes me feel like I really never mattered when he can forget 3 years in 2 weeks and have the nerve to call me up and thank me for making it easy for him to walk away. He won't know this at the time, but I won't be taking his calls or emails or anything anymore when he leaves that day, not for reasons of NC or any other silly "second chance" rules like that but simply for the reason of I don't think he deserves a woman like me anymore, period, enough said Link to post Share on other sites
DenverBachelor Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 there was a strong sexual tension that we both addressed . What position did you address this in? Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 What position did you address this in? .... Had to wipe my screen after I read this... Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Good to hear you are at peace with things, that is all that matters! Lets hope you never go back to the dark place, its no fun. I think it always feels better when you can at least be friends and have some sort of connection with them when its over. As for me, this weekend is going to really suck and I have to pretend that it doesn't. I have to watch what was my life move the rest of his things out to go start his new life with what he loves and appears to make him happy. I think what hurts the most is that it only took him a whole 2 weeks. Just makes me feel like I really never mattered when he can forget 3 years in 2 weeks and have the nerve to call me up and thank me for making it easy for him to walk away. He won't know this at the time, but I won't be taking his calls or emails or anything anymore when he leaves that day, not for reasons of NC or any other silly "second chance" rules like that but simply for the reason of I don't think he deserves a woman like me anymore, period, enough said Pixie i dont know your story but from that thread - count yourself lucky - because someone who can walk away like that sure as heck doesnt deserve you... Be strong - we are all here for you.... I know this is going to be harsh to hear but the only person who is our life is us - the other people that come into our lives, be it family, friends or lovers, play a role in the story of our life but they are never the central character. I felt the same way you do, i believed my ex was my life, and when she left i felt i had nothing to live for, yet here i am today 7 weeks later and trying to move on... Again its not going to be easy but you will one day wake and feel indifferent... Be Strong... Thorgs - buddy good to see your doing well - keep it up... glad youre enjoying the running - i told you it works.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 30, 2010 Author Share Posted July 30, 2010 Good to hear you are at peace with things, that is all that matters! Lets hope you never go back to the dark place, its no fun. I think it always feels better when you can at least be friends and have some sort of connection with them when its over. As for me, this weekend is going to really suck and I have to pretend that it doesn't. I have to watch what was my life move the rest of his things out to go start his new life with what he loves and appears to make him happy. I think what hurts the most is that it only took him a whole 2 weeks. Just makes me feel like I really never mattered when he can forget 3 years in 2 weeks and have the nerve to call me up and thank me for making it easy for him to walk away. He won't know this at the time, but I won't be taking his calls or emails or anything anymore when he leaves that day, not for reasons of NC or any other silly "second chance" rules like that but simply for the reason of I don't think he deserves a woman like me anymore, period, enough said I'm glad you're slowly climbing that hill. You will feel so much better when that empty/alone feeling passes! What position did you address this in? We are both very open people and talk about everything. It was a serious but casual conversation. Do I miss her? Yeah, definitely, but I have a feeling our paths will cross later in life. Right now I'm trying to focus on myself and improve myself mentally and physically, as I am still a role model to her daughters who I will be seeing every day for the next 180 school days Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 30, 2010 Author Share Posted July 30, 2010 Thorgs - buddy good to see your doing well - keep it up... glad youre enjoying the running - i told you it works.... Yeah, and it beats taking any kind of anti-depressant drug too! I jogged almost 2 whole miles yesterday. When I was jogging yesterday and came up on her and I was at the mile mark and I was tired as could be, but my heart went into hyperdrive. I thought I was going to drop right then and there, but I kept pushing Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Yeah, and it beats taking any kind of anti-depressant drug too! I jogged almost 2 whole miles yesterday. When I was jogging yesterday and came up on her and I was at the mile mark and I was tired as could be, but my heart went into hyperdrive. I thought I was going to drop right then and there, but I kept pushing good man thats the spirit - next find a local race even a small 5k or 3 mile one and sign up for - keep that as a goal in your mind and it will keep you focussed on the running which in turn will release endorphins, which in turn will keep you happy, which in turn will lead to greater things.... change the vicious cycle into a positive cycle... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted July 30, 2010 Author Share Posted July 30, 2010 good man thats the spirit - next find a local race even a small 5k or 3 mile one and sign up for - keep that as a goal in your mind and it will keep you focussed on the running which in turn will release endorphins, which in turn will keep you happy, which in turn will lead to greater things.... change the vicious cycle into a positive cycle... Yeah, I am actually thankful that I'm going through this, it's helping me in ways that I never thought possible and discovering myself again. Even though at the end of the day I'm still single, but hey, life keeps on goin' and we just have to roll with the punches! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thorgs Posted August 2, 2010 Author Share Posted August 2, 2010 Well, just my luck. My weekend totally sucked and I was losing my mind. I got extremely depressed. I text her to ask if I could take one of her dogs for the day because I was having a tough time and needed some company. She says yes, but she was out of town with her girls. So I go pick up one of her two dogs (the one I like the most). Well, I come home because I can't find a leash at her house so I come and take one that my aunt left here. I am on my way to take the dog to the park to go for a walk and yep, it happened. Threw up 4 times in my back seat. So I turned around, dropped the dog off after wiping her down and came home. Then cleaned the back of the car for an hour. My life completely sucks on the weekends and afternoon/evenings. When it rains...it pours. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted August 3, 2010 Share Posted August 3, 2010 Well, just my luck. My weekend totally sucked and I was losing my mind. I got extremely depressed. I text her to ask if I could take one of her dogs for the day because I was having a tough time and needed some company. She says yes, but she was out of town with her girls. So I go pick up one of her two dogs (the one I like the most). Well, I come home because I can't find a leash at her house so I come and take one that my aunt left here. I am on my way to take the dog to the park to go for a walk and yep, it happened. Threw up 4 times in my back seat. So I turned around, dropped the dog off after wiping her down and came home. Then cleaned the back of the car for an hour. My life completely sucks on the weekends and afternoon/evenings. When it rains...it pours. Do you have enough of a sense of humor left to appreciate my asking: Who was it that threw up 4 times in the back seat, you or the dog? And please, don't end a puke story with "When it rains, it pours" That's just throwing a straight-line out there that begs for more punch lines... Link to post Share on other sites
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