Trialbyfire Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Listen to yourself BCCA. Now it's all womens' fault again. Blind gender hatred. Don't turn into one of "those" bitter, bitter boys. Link to post Share on other sites
BCCA Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Listen to yourself BCCA. Now it's all womens' fault again. Blind gender hatred. Don't turn into one of "those" bitter, bitter boys. Listen to yourself. I mean honestly, youre rationalizing how what she did is ok, when its just not. It was bitter, petty, and unneccesary. Dont turn into a man hater, either. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Listen to yourself. I mean honestly, youre rationalizing how what she did is ok, when its just not. It was bitter, petty, and unneccesary. Dont turn into a man hater, either. Have you ever cheated on anyone BCCA? There's a subset of males I can't stand. The bitter boys. My preference is men. Link to post Share on other sites
kashmir Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 A few weeks ago I made a post about a girl doing something pretty scummy to me. Can't really call what she did cheating, but it was definitely a bitch move on her part. I mentioned that I made some sarcastic comments back to her in a smooth yet serious tone. I had the LS women bitching to me about what I said to her, hardly focusing on what the girl did. Some were even defending her a bit. Hence why I said this: Yeah, that's the thing - all this is stalker-like. I'm sure if the roles were reversed and it was a guy on here saying how he was going to expose his cheating girlfriend, people wouldn't approve of his revenge. Heck, they'd probably be defending her for cheating and making her a victim. Seen it too many times on here. I'm pretty convinced this thread is yet another female empowerment rally (not meaning to degrade any of you women who aren't condoning the OP ). I need to find a forum that's a bit more balanced. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytie TV Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 I personally think this is funny as hell. Nice job, OP. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneatnights Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 ithink we've all felt like this, wanting revenge etc but to act on it.... sick sick puppy Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 I'm failing to understand where there's any innocent party. I agree but shouting out what an ass the SO is wouldn't be that effective unless he's actually reading the forum. Link to post Share on other sites
BCCA Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Have you ever cheated on anyone BCCA? There's a subset of males I can't stand. The bitter boys. My preference is men. Never even considered it. Ive been cheated on, and wouldnt put anyone else through that. Besides, its so selfish. I know how you feel, but please, dont label me as a bitter boy because I think this was unneccesary and petty. Its no more appropriate than me calling you a scorned and bitter woman. Name calling is silly, and I know Ive done it too, but its not accomplishing anything. We'll have to agree to disagree. No one here is required to agree with everyone else, thats actually a good part of this forum. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Never even considered it. Ive been cheated on, and wouldnt put anyone else through that. Besides, its so selfish. I know how you feel, but please, dont label me as a bitter boy because I think this was unneccesary and petty. Its no more appropriate than me calling you a scorned and bitter woman. Name calling is silly, and I know Ive done it too, but its not accomplishing anything. We'll have to agree to disagree. No one here is required to agree with everyone else, thats actually a good part of this forum. I've yet to call you a bitter boy. My words were as follows: Don't turn into one of "those" bitter, bitter boys. I'm willing to let this drop, as long as you discontinue the unnecessary name calling on the OP, as long as you also treat the OP with some modicum of respect. There is no definitive right or wrong ways to handle anything. For one person like yourself, you would regret doing what the OP has done. For the OP, she has no regrets. Hammering her with your attitude post-mort, does nothing for her. You have to ask yourself why you need to hammer her about her "pettiness", when she's an entirely different person than you are. Link to post Share on other sites
BCCA Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 I dont mean to cause problems, but are you not hammering me for seeing something wrong with it? Thats my point, we dont agree - fine. But I dont feel as though Ive been any harder on her than anyone else has on me. And most of this was between me, you and another person who was not the OP. If shes fine with it, than who cares what I say? I merely stated an opinion. Have you ever cheated on anyone BCCA? There's a subset of males I can't stand. The bitter boys. My preference is men. Are you telling me that in my shoes, you would not have taken the below comment to be directed at me? If it truly wasnt, sorry for the misunderstanding, but I took it as a passive/aggresive insult. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 I dont mean to cause problems, but are you not hammering me for seeing something wrong with it? Thats my point, we dont agree - fine. But I dont feel as though Ive been any harder on her than anyone else has on me. And most of this was between me, you and another person who was not the OP. If shes fine with it, than who cares what I say? I merely stated an opinion.Go back and take a look at where you engaged me first to enforce your opinion in Caps. Are you telling me that in my shoes, you would not have taken the below comment to be directed at me? If it truly wasnt, sorry for the misunderstanding, but I took it as a passive/aggresive insult. My response of this: There's a subset of males I can't stand. The bitter boys. My preference is men. Was in response to this: Dont turn into a man hater, either. You told me not to turn into a man hater and I basically stated that there's a subset of males I can't stand, in essence, me saying that while I'm not a man-hater, there's a subset I can't stand. It flows, if you look at it straight on, with a different tone. Link to post Share on other sites
BCCA Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Fair enough. I don't want to draw this out anymore, your point has been taken, and believe it or not, I respect everyone's view. Reading text is not the same as a flowing conversation, and so I wasnt able to follow the conversation in the same light as it was intended. Thanks for the civil resolution to this discussion. No offense to any of you, I actually really appreciate your input. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 And thank you for your civil resolution, BCCA. I do agree that it's easy to misinterpret the tone behind the text, thus giving it a different flavour than intended. Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Dating slowly turns good guys into bad guys, leaving all the women wondering where the good guys are? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dollie Posted February 26, 2009 Author Share Posted February 26, 2009 Because it's generally true. For instance I doubt your ex is at this moment plotting to 'get evener' with you. He's almost surely trying to do what most normal guys would be doing; getting on with life. Of course he won't be, he does not know what I have done!! I hope she doesn't regret doing what she did in days, months to come, all we are trying to do as with most threads is give our opinion on the situation, what we might or might not have done, perhaps give a little food for thought. I didn't know she killed the dude! The horror!!!! ha ha ha Youre severly downplaying what she did. She took the time to create a fake profile with the sole purpose of trying to 'get even', lied to an innocent and unrelated person, and convinced her to dump him for her own satisfaction. It was wrong, she impersonated someone else, and flat out lied to this other girl. She did not approach this other woman as herself, only being concerned for this girls well being. She lied to this women over and over, betraying her trust for her own benefit. She did not have any interest in helping this woman 'see him for what he was', she just wanted him to get hurt so she could take pleasure in it. You are absolutely right!! let him know how it feels!! So... Dollie - created a fake profile and chatted with a girl, to get some answers about her cheating ex. Girl - used the ex, was embarrassed by him, dumped him to get back with her ex. Cheater - consistently cheated on Dollie and the other girl, for 7 months, approx. 1.5 years into the relationship. I'm failing to understand where there's any innocent party. Exactly!! birds of the same feather.... One question for you Dollie, why didn't you approach the new girl as yourself? meaning "her boyfriend's ex"??? I'm curious about your motive here. I may still do that but I needed answers Not saying anyone is inoccent, her ex is an ass, just was trying to point out what might have been better for Dollie to do for her own good, a different prospective. It was the best for me!! TWO WRONGS DO NOT MAKE A RIGHT! Has no one ever heard that before? I never said he was 100% innocent, I just said, over and over, that 'revenge' is not the answer, and it never is. It solved nothing, did NOT give her any answers, and Im sure she wont feel any better a couple days from now. I feel much better thanks and we cannot all think like you do can we? Of course she didnt, because that would have made this actual genuine concern for another person. This was 100% about her being mad and getting him back. Yep!! Perhaps Dollie should fess up and ask her, I bet she probably wouldn't be very happy. Since when did we take an ex's word on a ex's actions/being a cheat? We's probably just think "nutter ex" get out of my face. But who knows. Why would I do that? I am not doing this to ridicule her! Dollie now has answers she never would have known, without doing this. I do know how I felt after enacting what I did. It reset the balance for me. I took everything back and more and am glad I did. I've been dating all along since the incident. Now I'm engaged to a wonderful man. There's been no need to hold onto bitterness, gender hating for a perpetuity. See, it will work for me too!! Im sorry, I didnt mean to lump everyone together. It just boggles my mind that people think this is an appropriate way for an adult to act. I am not saying it is appropriate but it was right for me! Link to post Share on other sites
knaveman Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 It was childish and immature. If I ever dated a girl like you I hope I would see it soon enough to GTFO. Link to post Share on other sites
Squirtal Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 I also warned someone on Facebook of her partner. Her bf was an ex of mine who once making initial contact again on Facebook would not leave me alone. His status was single and he was constantly trying to get me to visit him or texting to come visit me and saying he missed me..we had split up acouple of years previously because he was a player and messed on me. I looked at his profile and noticed a girl there a lot, and her link to him said that they had hooked up and it was still an adventure. I asked about her and he denied her..then he changed his relationship status to being with her. I told him I was glad he finally admitted he had a gf. He still continued to try and get with me. I told him off, told him I thought it was disgusting that he could email me like this and I felt for his gf, he said they were swingers. Finally after I had told him to leave me alone in no uncertain term adn deleted him he emailed me again saying he missed me..so I emailed her and told her just warned her he was on my case..turns out they had been together 8 years..I had been with him when he had been with her 2 years..she was fuming..but sadly with me..seemed to think I wanted to get at him..but no I just wanted him out of my face and wanted her to know early on..thought they had been dating a few months..not that they had a house together..he tried to get me there while she was on tour...sad he lived with housemates. So I too have done this..I don't think it makes me psycho..it makes me looking out for other women..because you know what..in this day and age women should stick together..and if men are cheated on, they should also stick together. Link to post Share on other sites
Peter_pan Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 fb causes so much ****e. this is a crazy world Link to post Share on other sites
Surfer Dude Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Since when has "looking for answers" become euphemism for "breaking people up"? Anyhow, this is exactly why I avoid chicks with low self esteem and chicks with obsessive thoughts and negative patterns in their lives. Too much drama. I wonder how people here would react had the gender roles been reversed. Oh right, they'd be telling her to file a restraining order because he's a dangerous stalker Link to post Share on other sites
RouRou Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 So let me get this straight: You don't talk to him for a couple of weeks. Then you see him out on a date and so then obviously he is broken up with you. You then find out he has been seeing this girl for seven months. And instead of considering yourself fortunate to be rid of him and taking the high ground you decide it is a much better idea to sink to his level and act like an immature psycho. It sounds like one of those really bad Lifetime movies. It would be funnier on this end if it wasn't so despicable. I agree, you found out he was a loser bf, you should have been happy to be rid of him, instead you wasted all this time plotting and being sneaky when you could have just accepted the situation for what it was, moved on and met a nice man. Link to post Share on other sites
Stockalone Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Anyhow, this is exactly why I avoid chicks with low self esteem and chicks with obsessive thoughts and negative patterns in their lives. Too much drama. That depends on how you look at it. The way I see it, Dollie didn't start this whole mess, she merely finished what her ex started. I avoid a fight if I can, but that isn't always possible. Some people will always push their luck. On those very rare occasions, I never threw the first punch, but I tried (and luckily for me succeeded) to throw the last one. I certainly didn't turn the other cheek. Bullies only respond to strength, and cheaters only respond to exposure. Link to post Share on other sites
Surfer Dude Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 That depends on how you look at it. The way I see it, Dollie didn't start this whole mess, she merely finished what her ex started. I avoid a fight if I can, but that isn't always possible. Some people will always push their luck. On those very rare occasions, I never threw the first punch, but I tried (and luckily for me succeeded) to throw the last one. I certainly didn't turn the other cheek. Bullies only respond to strength, and cheaters only respond to exposure. Turning the other cheek would be getting back together with that person. If someone treats you disrespectfully (whatever that may be in your system of values), just nexting the person for someone better is the best course of action... and not talking to them ever again. "Warning others about the cheater" is just a rationalized wish for revenge. Me and many other people have been cheated on and yet we've never done anything to our ex partners. Why should I care about my ex? After what she did, she lost the privilege of having me in her life, why the hell would I want to have anything to do with her life. For all I care, she bang an entire football team Healthy cycle of healing goes like this: you're hurt and sad for a couple of months and after that you move on and don't care anymore. Taking time and effort to hurt them back is reactive and says a lot about someone's self esteem and ego issues. Link to post Share on other sites
Surfer Dude Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Backward rationalizations, my friend She felt angry and she acted on those feelings. It has nothing to do with justice. Link to post Share on other sites
blondesmiler Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Why would I do that? I am not doing this to ridicule her! but you have by pretending to be a friend, her friend, getting her to confide in you and talk to you and all when you had only your interests in mind. Put yourself in their shoes, if someone made friends with you and you confided in them, chatted to them, and then found out they were not who they said to be and doing it for their own motives, you telling me you would not feel humiliated and ridiculed. Not saying it was you intention, but that is part of what you have done with your actions. Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 That's YOUR view, and you're certainly welcome to it. News flash. People act based on their feelings all the time. She didn't take anything too far, IMO. She just didn't let someone get away with pulling crap on her. If you're the type to let someone do things to you and let them get away with it, good for you. Jaysus ... Yeah, people act based on their feelings all the time. And in almost every instance they'd be better off if they acted based on their integrity. Link to post Share on other sites
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