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How to Handle an Ex-friend


Trialbyfire

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C'mon girls this is getting cringey and classless now. I know we have all had our differences in the past but it is very obvious that you are both hurt because the truth is that you both care!

 

One of you needs to make the choice to stand back, it takes 2 to argue and it would be ok if you didnt like each other, but that is not true of you two! You both have extremely different lives and have different things to offer and yet you have been tight for a long time. Dont ruin that over some stupid difference of opinion.

 

Just both cool off and let go of the anger and you will see this as what it is, a silly spat over a difference of opinion that neither of you can, or will, drop.

 

You will be friends again next week but that wont happen if this carries on, as things will be said that are regretted and cant be taken back!

 

You would be saying the same as this if this was 2 other close friends saying these things wouldnt you?

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Your advice to me is flavoured by your projection of self and misunderstanding of who I am. In this, your advice/opinion is totally biased by your emotion of the moment, regardless of what is reality.

 

Your emotions tend to paint people who you like at the moment as Gods or Goddesses, who can do no wrong. When you have a falling out with people, your opinion moves conversely, towards whatever negative perception that person is cast in, demonized horns and all. This is what I question and have issues with. To me this results in a lack of civil distance.

 

Funny. Of course I disagree here completely but what's funny is that you just described yourself and the way you are letting your emotions get in the way of considering solid advice/commentary given in a spirit of trying to be helpful regarding the situation you solicited LS members advice for. And last time I checked I was still an LS member.

 

I'm not demonizing anyone. I'm just not agreeing with certain points. Where and how did I "demonize" anyone? That's ridiculous.

 

This is dumb. And I'm sorry that we don't agree on what "civil distance" means.

 

If it means that you post on a public forum soliciting members' views and that I'm supposed to not post on any thread that happens to be started by you, well sorry. Not gonna happen.

 

I'll post or not as I see fit. If I've been mean spirited or revealed anything other than what you yourself have revealed here on these boards, then I can completely understand your reaction. But again, that hasn't been the case at all.

 

So you have your definition of civil distance and I have mine. Mine simply means no contact off the boards. And since we haven't had that in over a month, I believe we are civilly distant enough to my liking.

 

So you see, the problem here is on your end. Not mine. Deal with it, TBF.

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Funny. Of course I disagree here completely but what's funny is that you just described yourself and the way you are letting your emotions get in the way of considering solid advice/commentary given in a spirit of trying to be helpful regarding the situation you solicited LS members advice for. And last time I checked I was still an LS member.

 

I'm not demonizing anyone. I'm just not agreeing with certain points. Where and how did I "demonize" anyone? That's ridiculous.

 

This is dumb. And I'm sorry that we don't agree on what "civil distance" means.

 

If it means that you post on a public forum soliciting members' views and that I'm supposed to not post on any thread that happens to be started by you, well sorry. Not gonna happen.

 

I'll post or not as I see fit. If I've been mean spirited or revealed anything other than what you yourself have revealed here on these boards, then I can completely understand your reaction. But again, that hasn't been the case at all.

 

So you have your definition of civil distance and I have mine. Mine simply means no contact off the boards. And since we haven't had that in over a month, I believe we are civilly distant to my liking.

 

So you see, the problem here is on your end. Not mine. Deal with it, TBF.

This I guess this thread continues. Deal with it Touche.

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This I guess this thread continues. Deal with it Touche.

 

:confused: Huh?

 

I am dealing. As much as I think it was a bad idea to start this thread I couldn't stop you could I?

 

So I am dealing with it.

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:confused: Huh?

 

I am dealing. As much as I think it was a bad idea to start this thread I couldn't stop you could I?

 

So I am dealing with it.

At least this thread contains the animosity within one thread, instead of polluting other threads. I don't have stalker needs. Do you?

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At least this thread contains the animosity within one thread, instead of polluting other threads. I don't have stalker needs. Do you?

 

Stalker? Animosity? Wow, talk about being melodramatic. I have no animosity nor do I stalk.

 

Anyway, I'm here to learn. And I really want to learn more about the inner workings of a short-term relationship. When you get sick is it allowed for the IO (insignificant other) to come over with a pot of chicken noodle soup? Or does that smack too much of LTR behavior?

 

I must know more about this.

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I get what you're saying. You're saying that you're going to continue providing biased negative insight, without understanding the fundamentals of who I am since you've projected yourself into me, for personal perceived gain of "winning", regardless of what's considered civil distance aka my boundaries. Do you really hate yourself so much?

 

What a star you are! You win...

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How can an argument between two people who cannot stand not to have the last word end other than in mutually assured destruction?

 

Ooooh, I just love riddles!

 

I don't know...how?

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I get what you're saying. You're saying that you're going to continue providing biased negative insight, without understanding the fundamentals of who I am since you've projected yourself into me, for personal perceived gain of "winning", regardless of what's considered civil distance aka my boundaries. Do you really hate yourself so much?

 

What a star you are! You win...

 

:lmao::lmao: Yep, that's it. TBF. That's exactly what I was saying! You're so insightful. You win....

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How can an argument between two people who cannot stand not to have the last word end other than in mutually assured destruction?

Do you have any suggestions?

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This thread is silly and immature.

Well, you would be the authority on that subject.

 

Anyway, you can't force somebody to be your friend. Even if you would be good for them (in your opinion). Sure, I managed it for a few years, but eventually they find a way to escape. To make matters worse, they took my giant Toblerone. Life just ain't fair.

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I hate it when people sneak in my back door. Wait! No I don't!!

Oh yes you do, admit it. The back door is your preferred method of entrance.

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I would be sooooooo upset if anyone stole my giant toblerone!

Dude, you have no idea. It's the ultimate betrayal. I will hunt them down, and challenge their dignity with a huge, triangular dildo.

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Respects your boundaries?... Just ignore her posts. This is a public forum, and she's hardly written anything incendiary or offensive.

 

Thanks, SP. Yeah, that's what I said. Just ignore me. What boundaries am I supposed to respect that I'm not anyway?

 

You of all people should know by now that i don't take too kindly to being dictated to. That's a no-no in my book.

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