15 year old having boyfriend to stay

[blind_otter]

I'm not a parent yet either, and I don't think one needs to be a parent to answer this question. I was a teenager not that long ago and when no one was home, boyfriend was snuck in and we had sex--it was That easy.

 

Obviously I was a teenager too, and I never snuck anyone into my parents house. When no one was in the house I would enjoy my solitude, that was about it. Sometimes I would have female friends over. I understood the rules of the household in which I lived and I attended to those rules. I never had sex while I lived under their roof. I probably would have waited longer than I did if I had not been raped when I was 19.

 

I respected my parents wishes and I completely agreed with them that I was not emotionally ready to deal with the consequences of having sex.

[Lishy]

BO - That is what I am talking about - You didnt do these things as they were not made easy for you to do. Your upbringing gave you the tools to see that having sex at an early age was not a good idea.

[Touche]

BNB, was this a boyfriend of yours whom gave you the thing, or a random guy? There's a difference between a boyfriend and a random guy staying over.

 

Arch and Touche--time to get a room. The sexual tension is High!

 

Ariadne--i find it quite interesting how you speak of your son. Almost contradictory to what you were suggesting I should have done. But I guess you would agree with me that it isn't the mothers fault if an unmarried girl / woman becomes pregnant--since you claimed it was only my fault I became pregnant with the MM baby and not at all his fault. Hearing this come from the mouth of a mother--who freely allows her son to have sex in her own home (so you claim) is amazing to me.

 

Ha, ha Gwyn. Very funny. I don't think we'll be pestered by the likes of him anymore. No sexual tension on my part. I was trying to bring out the anti-social aspects that I knew were there, and I succeeded.

 

So sorry about all of that Lishy. I apologize.

 

And Ariadne, you say I don't believe you but that you are a parent. Well, no offense but giving birth does not a parent make. I was shocked at what you posted. It's reprehensible and very irresponsible of you as a parent. Hey, it's no secret what I think of you as a parent...as a person I do love you though.

 

Lishy, what will your sister do? Or did she already allow it?

[Ariadne]

Ariadne--i find it quite interesting how you speak of your son. Almost contradictory to what you were suggesting I should have done. But I guess you would agree with me that it isn't the mothers fault if an unmarried girl / woman becomes pregnant--since you claimed it was only my fault I became pregnant with the MM baby and not at all his fault. Hearing this come from the mouth of a mother--who freely allows her son to have sex in her own home (so you claim) is amazing to me.

 

Gwyneth,

 

Not sure what you mean by what you "should have done". If it's about your pregnancy I told you that the best choice for you is to keep the baby, and any other choice would be a mistake. In fact, that's what I'd do too in your situation as I mentioned.

 

In fact. I think that every woman over 30 should just go and get pregnant. By anybody, do like the zebras or deers, get pregnant. Time doesn't wait and if you want to be mothers just do it.

 

But, leave ONS Joe alone, and FWB Jack that you met two weeks ago alone, and married guy alone.

 

Now everyone is paranoid. How are they not going to be? If women are giving those men who gave them a babies the 18 year long, million dollar lawsuit? It's crazy. Tell them, and let them see the babies, and let it be free.

 

Anyway, about my son. I sure hope she doesn't get pregnant. She is very young. I wish she were on some birth control. I even thought of talking to her mother but I can't tell them what to do, of course. All I can do is provide my son with plenty of condoms and hope he'll be ok.

[Ariadne]

Gwyneth, Adriande is a law unto herself - When she gives advice I normally half it, quarter it and then forget it lol - Making sure her boy has lots of condoms and bringing them snacks to his room !!!!!!!!!!!!! hahhahaha

 

Well,

 

I believe my son, or teenagers, have the right to enjoy their sexuality like anybody else.

 

Because they are young, they don't have to do it in a closet in three seconds.

 

This is an important time, a time of discovery, of development. They should be enjoying that experience fully.

[bentnotbroken]

BNB, was this a boyfriend of yours whom gave you the thing, or a random guy? There's a difference between a boyfriend and a random guy staying over.

 

Arch and Touche--time to get a room. The sexual tension is High!

 

Ariadne--i find it quite interesting how you speak of your son. Almost contradictory to what you were suggesting I should have done. But I guess you would agree with me that it isn't the mothers fault if an unmarried girl / woman becomes pregnant--since you claimed it was only my fault I became pregnant with the MM baby and not at all his fault. Hearing this come from the mouth of a mother--who freely allows her son to have sex in her own home (so you claim) is amazing to me.

 

 

 

I never did random guys, but that didn't mean he didn't do random girls, no matter what he told me. I shouldn't have been having sex, then it wouldn't have been an issue. My mother and I have since talked about some of the things that I did, and she told me the same thing I tell my own children. I am your mother, I love you, I would die for you and kill for you. I would never tell you something to stop you from growing, only things that ensure your growth, in ever area of your life. So that when it is time for you to fly under your own steam, you are strong enough to fight against the wind and remain beautiful in spirit and soul.

[Touche]

That's beautiful, bent....and very well-said.

 

I often think that my job would be SOOOO much easier if I didn't have to guide, enforce rules, discipline, etc. etc.. I would really have a much easier life if I let our son just do whatever he wants, doesn't want, say what he wants, eat whatever he wants, etc. etc.

 

But then I wouldn't be a parent anymore. I'd just be one of his buddies.

[Gwyneth]

Well,

 

I believe my son, or teenagers, have the right to enjoy their sexuality like anybody else.

 

Because they are young, they don't have to do it in a closet in three seconds.

 

This is an important time, a time of discovery, of development. They should be enjoying that experience fully.

 

Yet you scolded me for being an adult, having sex, and getting pregnant...

 

And your advice wasn't to Just raise it on my own--your other options were to abort it, or put it up for adoption.

[Gwyneth]

I never did random guys, but that didn't mean he didn't do random girls, no matter what he told me. I shouldn't have been having sex, then it wouldn't have been an issue. My mother and I have since talked about some of the things that I did, and she told me the same thing I tell my own children. I am your mother, I love you, I would die for you and kill for you. I would never tell you something to stop you from growing, only things that ensure your growth, in ever area of your life. So that when it is time for you to fly under your own steam, you are strong enough to fight against the wind and remain beautiful in spirit and soul.

 

My mother didn't advocate sex, but she did advocate safe sex. She put both my sister and I on the BC pill at 16 (me for medical reasons and sister because she was jealous I was on it...). I don't think parents should be advocating sex, but they need to realize their children might be or will be having sex--so advocate safe sex

 

But bringing your child desserts while he's in his bedroom with door shut and locked is unbelievable.

 

Also, it's not like I snuck my boyfriend in to be rebellious. If my mom came home and saw him there, I would had acted cool about it. My mom would rather I said "hey, boyfriend will be over after school," rather than sneek him over. But sometimes I didn't tell her. I don't recall ever being in trouble for having him over, though. Besides, someone was almost Always home--if it wasn't a family member, it was the housekeeper.

 

I was 16--it was horrible. He was King Kong and I was a munchkin .

[not_clever]

I have a 15 year old and if she even dared to ask if a boyfriend could stay she would be scattered all over the place. In the U.K it is illegal for children under the age of 16 to participate in under age sex. call me old fashioned at 34 but no way.