15 year old having boyfriend to stay

[directx]

Oh, to put a stop in it. The way of the Tao is the way of nature, and I'm kind of a Taoist at heart.

Does the way of the Tao respect other religeons as well, or do they not tolerate other ones?

[Touche]

Oh, to put a stop in it. The way of the Tao is the way of nature, and I'm kind of a Taoist at heart.

 

So it's against your religion to be a parent?

[Arch]

So it's against your religion to be a parent?

 

You know AP should really look at her friends before she calls people arrogant because you emanate it.

[directx]

You know AP should really look at her friends before she calls people arrogant because you emanate it.

 

What is AP?

[Arch]

What is AP?

 

AnswerPlease , their are some numbers at the end of her name but I cant remember them.

[directx]

AnswerPlease , their are some numbers at the end of her name but I cant remember them.

 

Why did you drag her into your response to touche?

[Arch]

Why did you drag her into your response to touche?

 

Because she called me arrogant, I simply found the hypocrisy funny.

[directx]

Because she called me arrogant, I simply found the hypocrisy funny.

 

But 'AP' wasnt talking to you. Touche was. Makes no sense.

[Ariadne]

Does the way of the Tao respect other religeons as well, or do they not tolerate other ones?

 

Yes, everyone coexists in Taoism.

 

So it's against your religion to be a parent?

 

I know you don't believe me much, but I am a parent.

[directx]

Yes, everyone coexists in Taoism.

 

 

 

I know you don't believe me much, but I am a parent.

 

Well, if everyone coexists in Taoism, what if its against the father's religion to allow you to let his daughter have sex underage? Would you then honor his religious beliefs then?

[Arch]

But 'AP' wasnt talking to you. Touche was. Makes no sense.

 

It makes total sense, she implied being arrogant was bad, Touche as I said before emanates arrogance.

 

Therefore Touche under her own friends standards is bad.

[directx]

It makes total sense, she implied being arrogant was bad, Touche as I said before emanates arrogance.

 

Therefore Touche under her own friends standards is bad.

 

Nah, I think you just can't handle a little criticism and feel the need the make cheap digs at people, thinking you are witty and smart. But actually, it was quite cowardly. making a dig at touche is fine because she was talking to you. Holding a grudge against someone and dragging their name at any excuse, especially when they didn't talk to you recently, is just...weak.

[Arch]

Nah, I think you just can't handle a little criticism and feel the need the make cheap digs at people, thinking you are witty and smart. But actually, it was quite cowardly. making a dig at touche is fine because she was talking to you. Holding a grudge against someone and dragging their name at any excuse, especially when they didn't talk to you recently, is just...weak.

 

Oh I was not making a "digg" at AP as much as I was trying to remove Touche from the moral pedestal she thinks shes on.

[Ariadne]

Well, if everyone coexists in Taoism, what if its against the father's religion to allow you to let his daughter have sex underage? Would you then honor his religious beliefs then?

 

Then he can stop his own daughter, talk to her, instruct her in his religion. Whatever it is those people do.

 

I'm not in the way of anything.

[directx]

Oh I was not making a "digg" at AP as much as I was trying to remove Touche from the moral pedestal she thinks shes on.

 

Well, think about not using shot gun blast diggs but more targeted ones. Everyone is on some pedestal or another. Get them off it with logic rather than insults. Sometimes you truly hurt people's feelings and may not realize it, and I don't think anyone wants that.

[directx]

Then he can stop his own daughter, talk to her, instruct her in his religion. Whatever it is those people do.

 

I'm not in the way of anything.

 

Or maybe you can stop encouraging it. You should find out what his beliefs are, and instead of possibly hindering her beliefs, but possibly help her.

 

No one is born with all the religious 'right way to act'. It takes practice, knowledge, and discipline to follow any religion correctly and truly understand what religions ask of people. She may WANT to make the right decision thats for her, but you or your son may be confusing her because of you following your religion with her involved.

 

I know. You will say "Im not making her do anything! she is making her own choice! If her religeon is not instilled into her deep enough, it may not be the right religeion for her!" or something like that.

 

Well, she may be on a spiritual journey and need guidance, from her father as well. Give her choice and her father a choice. She is underage. Let them try to follow their religion with some support from you rather than turning a blind eye and hiding behind your beliefs.

And does her father know of your beliefs and stance on sex? Maybe he should if she is to be in your house. And i dont see why you wouldnt tell him. Your religeon is nothing to be ashamed of I am sure you will agree.

 

These kids are underage. Which means their parents need to be aware of who is supervising them and the circumstances.

[directx]

So you would rather have her have sex at her age in a uncomfrotable place then have sex in a comfortable place?

 

That doesn't make sense.

 

As a side note - small amounts of weed no one cares about, "cops" will say don't do it for the sake of being police, but in reality they don't really care.

 

Actually, I totally disagree with this. Cops see the worst of everything, pot heads included. Trust me , i know. They know that when they see 'small amounts', they know nobody just stops at 'small amounts'.

Good cops realize how even pot can turn a teenager into a uninspired waste product if smoked too much, and if the cop has a child the same age as the teen, all they will problaby think about is 'i dont want my kid to turn into a pot head'.

[directx]

oh boy... I m only 22 and I remember ALOT from a few years back. My mother did allow my boyfriend to sleep over ALOT. Most people are right she has probably had sex anywhoo. I have to admit now that I am older I dont understand why my mother allowed this is the house back then. I wish she would of been more firm on me. Maybe I would of never done so many mistakes.. giving me the okay for that was like allowing me to do alot of other things I wish I would have never done. Now it is stuck in the back of my head for a very long time. When you think you have actually found the right person you wish he would have been your first or at least one of your first.

 

I dont know .. just my point of view

 

You just gave an excellent reason why it should not be ignored nor this situation encouraged. At her age and your age at the time, a parent should be allowed to know what is going on and who is supervising it. Especially if its someone who is supervising that is imposing their religion and beliefs over someone else's child. And I would like to ephasize the supervisor is imposing their beliefs ON THE PARENT as much, if not more, than the child.

[directx]

Then he can stop his own daughter, talk to her, instruct her in his religion. Whatever it is those people do.

 

I'm not in the way of anything.

 

Hmmm...those people...

 

You are not in the way? You might tell yourself that. You are not allowing a parent to raise their child the way they think they ought to be raised. I would argue you are IN THE WAY of that.

You have a responsibility to tell the girls parents of the situation your son is putting your daughter in. Whether you like it or not. You might also agree with sniffing gasoline or doing crack cocaine or meth. I'm not being a wise guy here. You wouldnt BELIEVE what some parents openly let their kid do.

 

Because what might be right for you, may not be right for some. It takes different strokes to move the world, yes it does. It takes different strokes to move the world.

 

So what might be right for your son, may not be right for the parent or his/her daughter.

[Ariadne]

Or maybe you can stop encouraging it. You should find out what his beliefs are, and instead of possibly hindering her beliefs, but possibly help her.

 

No one is born with all the religious 'right way to act'. It takes practice, knowledge, and discipline to follow any religion correctly and truly understand what religions ask of people. She may WANT to make the right decision thats for her, but you or your son may be confusing her because of you following your religion with her involved.

 

I know. You will say "Im not making her do anything! she is making her own choice! If her religeon is not instilled into her deep enough, it may not be the right religeion for her!" or something like that.

 

Well, she may be on a spiritual journey and need guidance, from her father as well. Give her choice and her father a choice. She is underage. Let them try to follow their religion with some support from you rather than turning a blind eye and hiding behind your beliefs.

And does her father know of your beliefs and stance on sex? Maybe he should if she is to be in your house. And i dont see why you wouldnt tell him. Your religeon is nothing to be ashamed of I am sure you will agree.

 

These kids are underage. Which means their parents need to be aware of who is supervising them and the circumstances.

 

Hmmm...those people...

 

You are not in the way? You might tell yourself that. You are not allowing a parent to raise their child the way they think they ought to be raised. I would argue you are IN THE WAY of that.

You have a responsibility to tell the girls parents of the situation your son is putting your daughter in. Whether you like it or not. You might also agree with sniffing gasoline or doing crack cocaine or meth. I'm not being a wise guy here. You wouldnt BELIEVE what some parents openly let their kid do.

 

Because what might be right for you, may not be right for some. It takes different strokes to move the world, yes it does. It takes different strokes to move the world.

 

So what might be right for your son, may not be right for the parent or his/her daughter.

 

Hmmm... no.

 

I'm not into doctrines or any of that kind of stuff.

 

Btw, I'm close friends with the girl's mother (she knows all about Denver guy) and she's never even mentioned any religion to me.

 

Who knows what they are, if they are any.

[Star Gazer]

Do you think it is wise to allow your 15 year old daughters boyfriend to stay the night even if it is on the sofa, but the sofa is in the room next to your daughter and you are asleep on the floor above?

 

My BFs did when I was that age. But I won't tell you the naughty things we did when the parentals went to sleep...

[Lishy]

Wow this thread certainly escalated as soon as I went to sleep!!!!!!!!!

 

I have read all of your replies and I must say again that I am talking about my niece here and that since I started this thread I have spoken to my sister in depth and told her that I do not agree with my nieces boyfriend staying the night and that if my neice (who I love like my own) gets preganant then my sister will have no choice but to blame herself.

 

I have listened to all of your very differing opinions and I still think that allowing a 15 year old girl to have her boyfriend to stay over is wrong - My sister has argued that if she does not allow it then she risks her daughter lying to her and pretending to be where she isnt and although I agree with this I still belive that she needs to gain more respect, and by allowing them to stay at her house is not good parenting IMO!

 

THis boy is the first of many, I should imagine, and will my sister wake up in the morning to find random strangers coming out of her daughters room?

 

Our mum never allowed us to have a boyfriend stay the night and I never slept around - I reached the age of 33 having only slept with 2 serious boyfriends, and never in my parents house!

 

Thank you all for your advice and real life situations!

[bentnotbroken]

Wow this thread certainly escalated as soon as I went to sleep!!!!!!!!!

 

I have read all of your replies and I must say again that I am talking about my niece here and that since I started this thread I have spoken to my sister in depth and told her that I do not agree with my nieces boyfriend staying the night and that if my neice (who I love like my own) gets preganant then my sister will have no choice but to blame herself.

 

I have listened to all of your very differing opinions and I still think that allowing a 15 year old girl to have her boyfriend to stay over is wrong - My sister has argued that if she does not allow it then she risks her daughter lying to her and pretending to be where she isnt and although I agree with this I still belive that she needs to gain more respect, and by allowing them to stay at her house is not good parenting IMO!

 

THis boy is the first of many, I should imagine, and will my sister wake up in the morning to find random strangers coming out of her daughters room?

 

Our mum never allowed us to have a boyfriend stay the night and I never slept around - I reached the age of 33 having only slept with 2 serious boyfriends, and never in my parents house!

 

Thank you all for your advice and real life situations!

 

 

It got a little off topic didn't it?

[Lishy]

It got a little off topic didn't it?

 

It was not so off topic, it is just people's differing opinions and emotions got high! But it was all good lol

 

The bottom line is that most of the people who think it was ok were people who did not have children. I do belive that in this situation you have to know what parental love is to be able to know how it would feel!

[Gwyneth]

BNB, was this a boyfriend of yours whom gave you the thing, or a random guy? There's a difference between a boyfriend and a random guy staying over.

 

Arch and Touche--time to get a room. The sexual tension is High!

 

Ariadne--i find it quite interesting how you speak of your son. Almost contradictory to what you were suggesting I should have done. But I guess you would agree with me that it isn't the mothers fault if an unmarried girl / woman becomes pregnant--since you claimed it was only my fault I became pregnant with the MM baby and not at all his fault. Hearing this come from the mouth of a mother--who freely allows her son to have sex in her own home (so you claim) is amazing to me.