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It appears 'Honesty' doesnt work in the Dating World so I need to become a 'Good Liar'

IntBrowser

By IntBrowser
in Dating

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Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

friendship that can grow into a relationship

Ok, lets address that. Is it what you tell women online? Because friendship that can grow into a relationship means *friends with benefits* then we'll see. It would be better to use the word 'date'. If you have a problem with early exclusivity then just say you'd like to date casually first. 

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peach302 Established Member

peach302

Posted
Posted
Just now, Gaeta said:

Ok, lets address that. Is it what you tell women online? Because friendship that can grow into a relationship means *friends with benefits* then we'll see. It would be better to use the word 'date'. If you have a problem with early exclusivity then just say you'd like to date casually first. 

All those people who write "see whats out there" or " looking to meet new people/form friendships"...get an automatic rejection from moi. 😂. 

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Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
11 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

When I put up a honest upbeat profile I never get a match.    Just going by experience

"“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.” - Albert Einstein

Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

 Because friendship that can grow into a relationship means *friends with benefits* then we'll see.

Agree. Stick with straight ahead phrases. Eg: "long term relationship". It doesn't mean with anyone reading but 'friends turning into a relationship' is too ambiguous. 

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Weezy1973 Established Member

Weezy1973

Posted
Posted

I was honest in my profile and in person. Got lots of dates, and met my current wife through OLD. Being honest isn’t the problem. And I’m about as average a guy as you can get. Below average height. Below average income. 

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jspice Established Member

jspice

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, IntBrowser said:

When I put up a honest upbeat profile I never get a match.    Just going by experience

So go ahead and lie then. 
Why are you still debating it? Go for it. 

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Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, IntBrowser said:

When I put up a honest upbeat profile I never get a match. 

So, when do you get a match? What has been working so far that women replied to your messages? 

The thing is you DO get messages from women, and they reply to your messages so that tells me you probably look well put together. 

What is the age of those women you're messaging? 

  • Like 1
SumGuy Established Member

SumGuy

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, IntBrowser said:

No she was the one who said she wont be going on a date until 5/21 because that when she gets the vaccine.

Just ask her for a date when she is fully vaccinated, if she seriously gave you date by which she is ready to re-enter the world.  Hint, hint.    If the conversation was going well.   You could also ask her for a social distant meet outside, after all you haven't seen her with her mask on I bet, these days that look is an important one for a guy to know.   :) 

dramafreezone Established Member

dramafreezone

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, IntBrowser said:

When I put up a honest upbeat profile I never get a match.    Just going by experience

First of all I would say get off of OLD.  If you want to do it then I would keep my expectations low.

Put up well-dressed photos of you enjoying your hobbies and your friends.  You don't need to write some super-upbeat or eloquent profile.  There is no profiile good enough that you could compose that would turn her own if she didn't care for what she saw in the photos.

Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
52 minutes ago, dramafreezone said:

First of all I would say get off of OLD.  If you want to do it then I would keep my expectations low.

100% Agree... I really do think you'll have better luck in "Real Life" situations/circumstances.

I met a woman at a local dog park this morning, (during my morning walk).  She and I chit-chatted about her Brittany Spaniel, I could have easily gotten her phone number, if I wanted to ask her out.

Do you have the ability to casually talk to people in the real world?? 

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Ami1uwant Established Member

Ami1uwant

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

friendship that can grow into a relationship

In translation......I want sex on date 1, if we get to date 4 it’s because you got pregnant.

 

Instead...say you want to find a long term relationship that can lead to marriage.

 

with Covid many can’t do the things they’d like to do. Even if you have friends locally you can’t see them and hang out.  If you have rested a buddy bubble for socializing then say that.  It’s something my sister did.

 

 

 

 

Ami1uwant Established Member

Ami1uwant

Posted
Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Happy Lemming said:

100% Agree... I really do think you'll have better luck in "Real Life" situations/circumstances.

I met a woman at a local dog park this morning, (during my morning walk).  She and I chit-chatted about her Brittany Spaniel, I could have easily gotten her phone number, if I wanted to ask her out.

Do you have the ability to casually talk to people in the real world?? 

 

 dogs and having kids are conversation starters.  

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
37 minutes ago, Ami1uwant said:

 

um dogs and having kids are conversation starters.  You walked alone a conversation likelydidnt happen

Yes... In this instance I used the dog as a conversation starter, but I've talked to people walking alone (without dogs).  A few weeks back, I talked to one woman who was walking this local nature trail that I frequent from time to time.

I'll talk to people in my neighborhood when I'm out on my walks (again, without dogs).  I've developed that ability. 

It takes practice, but there is no reason the OP can't learn this skill.

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IntBrowser Established Member

IntBrowser

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)
4 hours ago, Ami1uwant said:

In translation......I want sex on date 1, if we get to date 4 it’s because you got pregnant.

 

Instead...say you want to find a long term relationship that can lead to marriage.

 

with Covid many can’t do the things they’d like to do. Even if you have friends locally you can’t see them and hang out.  If you have rested a buddy bubble for socializing then say that.  It’s something my sister did.

 

 

I will put that in there next week,  I need a break and will probably be at the casino the rest of the week......my home away from home

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
formatting
Soak Established Member

Soak

Posted
Posted

Just be honest with people. If they don't like you for you, or run away because they don't like your answers, let them.

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Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

will probably be at the casino the rest of the week......my home away from home

Do you mention that during your conversation with the ladies? 

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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

 I need a break and will probably be at the casino the rest of the week......my home away from home

Why don't you look around at the casino to see if a lady catches your eye?  You may be better suited to somebody who shares your love of gambling 

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Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted

I'm starting to have a clearer image.

If I remember well you do not want to go out Saturday before 2 pm because you play videogames till 4 am on Friday nights and you are inflexible about this.

You don't go on dates on Sundays because it sucks to be rejected 24 hours before work. So that makes you available for a date Saturdays from 2 pm to lets say 9 pm. None negociable.

You don't have hobbies or friends but casino is your home away from home and can spend an entire week over there, by yourself.

Considering you are 38 years old I'd say all this doesn't make you an interesting prospect for a woman looking for a life partner. You are the eternal bachelor set in his ways that doesn't want to get out of his comfort zone. 

You desperately need a dating coach. And you have to be willing to change a few things in your life, habits, outlook on life and dating.

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peach302 Established Member

peach302

Posted
Posted (edited)
21 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

I'm starting to have a clearer image.

If I remember well you do not want to go out Saturday before 2 pm because you play videogames till 4 am on Friday nights and you are inflexible about this.

You don't go on dates on Sundays because it sucks to be rejected 24 hours before work. So that makes you available for a date Saturdays from 2 pm to lets say 9 pm. None negociable.

You don't have hobbies or friends but casino is your home away from home and can spend an entire week over there, by yourself.

Considering you are 38 years old I'd say all this doesn't make you an interesting prospect for a woman looking for a life partner. You are the eternal bachelor set in his ways that doesn't want to get out of his comfort zone. 

You desperately need a dating coach. And you have to be willing to change a few things in your life, habits, outlook on life and dating.

No disrespect to the OP but all of that would be a huge turn off for a grown woman looking for a stable life partner/husband. 

None of those behaviours   demonstrate a high value man.  Obviously it can be changed. Like you suggested with  a coach. Even without a coach if he put work into himself on his own. 

 

Edited by peach302
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hippychick3 Established Member

hippychick3

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, peach302 said:

No disrespect to the OP but all of that would be a huge turn off for a grown woman looking for a stable life partner/husband. 

None of those behaviours   demonstrate a high value man.  

 

And it has absolutely nothing to do with cooking. 
 

I feel the OP is not quite getting that. 

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peach302 Established Member

peach302

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, hippychick3 said:

And it has absolutely nothing to do with cooking. 
 

I feel the OP is not quite getting that. 

Yeah now that  i know the context (thanks to gaeta)..it makes more sense.

A lot of women on these sites probably get an unflattering picture ( not a photo but of his lifestyle) of him as a person. Im assuming.

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Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted
37 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

If I remember well you do not want to go out Saturday before 2 pm because you play videogames till 4 am on Friday nights and you are inflexible about this.

It just dawn on me,  I remember OP originally said he was playing videogames up to 4 am on Friday nights then he admitted later it was not videogames but online gambling. 

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peach302 Established Member

peach302

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

It just dawn on me,  I remember OP originally said he was playing videogames up to 4 am on Friday nights then he admitted later it was not videogames but online gambling. 

Thats an unhealthy habit. Not good! 

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Ami1uwant Established Member

Ami1uwant

Posted
Posted
23 hours ago, Happy Lemming said:

Yes... In this instance I used the dog as a conversation starter, but I've talked to people walking alone (without dogs).  A few weeks back, I talked to one woman who was walking this local nature trail that I frequent from time to time.

I'll talk to people in my neighborhood when I'm out on my walks (again, without dogs).  I've developed that ability. 

It takes practice, but there is no reason the OP can't learn this skill.


 

talking to neighbors is like talking to your coworkers.....these are not the same as meeting someone you’d date.

dramafreezone Established Member

dramafreezone

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Ami1uwant said:


 

talking to neighbors is like talking to your coworkers.....these are not the same as meeting someone you’d date.

But you could date your co-workers or your neighbors.

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