Fight Over Weight Gain

[Blanco]

@blanco

 

It’s not a cop out. It’s a chemical reaction inside your body that when cortisol rises your blood sugar lowers and that makes you crave foods high in fat and sugar. Proven by doctors from reputable hospitals.

 

Some even say you can exercise the same way, eat the same way but if under prolonged stress, gain weight.

 

How much more proof do you need than that?

 

It's a cop out because unless they are an addict, they still have the agency to not give in to that craving. You're making it sound like because one happens, the other thing needs to happen.

[Blanco]

And YOU may think there is no reason for anybody to gain weight outside of pregnancy or medication. But there are reasons why MANY people do gain whether you think it's unacceptable or not. For some it's laziness, for some it's greediness, for some it's addiction, for some it's genuine dislike for exercise, for some it's depression, for some it's a genuine like for food, for some it's not enough consistent portion control or calorie counting, for some it's not enough consistent exercise they may prefer to do, for some it's a lifestyle that they don't want to make time for due to current busy or weird schedule, for some it's genuine acceptance, for some it's a genuine lack of want to, for some it's a combination of these things and having hard time finding balance or method that will work FOR THEM for a lifetime. At the end of the day it's THEIR decision. It's THEIR struggle. and to me it's not fair to them that people think it's just one simple fix that many genuinely struggle with doing or to think it's so simple to decide to fix to try to please another person when many already struggle to try to fix it for themselves smh

 

That's fair, and that's their choice. But most of those are excuses, not reasons.

 

Ultimately, if the OP's girlfriend is too lazy or uninterested in taking care of herself physically, that's her choice and the OP has no right to demand she change. In that instance, we're talking of a lifestyle incompatibility, and it's best for them to part ways so they can find people better suited to their respective desired ways of life.

[Curiousroxy86]

In that instance, we're talking of a lifestyle incompatibility, and it's best for them to part ways so they can find people better suited to their respective desired ways of life.

 

Wholeheartedly agree blanco

[amaysngrace]

It's a cop out because unless they are an addict, they still have the agency to not give in to that craving. You're making it sound like because one happens, the other thing needs to happen.

 

It’s an exorbitant amount of stress to be a caregiver to your parent. I don’t think you’re understanding that. Most times they come before you. Their health is your main focus.

 

And yes, at times you are on automatic pilot because it’s just that taxing on your well-being. Your whole life is turned upside-down, at least mine was. There was no more routine, routine revolved around mom.

 

You know what? I give up. Blame it on potato chips that she’s been eating if you think it’s that simple, which you apparently do. The doctors conducting the studies are wrong and their findings are wrong but you’re right. Just blame it on potato chips.

[preraph]

yes, caregiving is super stressful and you don't have time for it, so food isn't something you can plan well and you end up eating on the run. Maybe she does that anyway, don't know. It's really not for anyone to judge. If you don't like it, leave, you know.

[amaysngrace]

I planned meals because I cooked for mine. And I fed her the most fattening, calorie laden, tempting foods I could make and I’m happy to report she lost no weight at all through her battle with cancer.

 

And if I put on a few pounds in the process then so be it. It was the least of my worries at the time and I wouldn’t change any of it if I could go back and do it all again.

[Blanco]

There was a two month period many years ago during which I got dumped, had my mom nearly die in my arms, had to move out of my childhood home and find a place to live on my own for the first time, carry a full class load, work, and visit my mom in the hospital each day even though she had no idea who I was.

 

Needless to say it was stressful and I look back and don’t know how I got through it. I can say that working out and eating well helped a lot, as it was one of the few things at the time that felt within my control.

 

Look, I’ve dealt with weight issues my whole life, though I’ve never been obese. So I get it. I know how comforting junk food can be while it just digs you further into this hole you feel you can’t escape. I eat better a lot of the time now but I do so with the understanding that I have food issues and struggle to eat junk in moderation much like a drunk cannot stop at one drink. As such, I do what I can not to frequently reward myself with garbage food. I go through stretches where I fail and end up putting on 10-15 pounds.

 

We are all just strangers here but I resent the implication that I couldn’t possibly get what the OP’s girlfriend is going through just because I’m of the opinion that she is not totally helpless in her situation.

 

I’m checking out of this thread as to not detail it any further.

[Robert]

Since the thread starter seems to have resolved this issue we will close it up since it has devolved into a general discussion about weight rather than his issue, thanks all who participated and if the thread starter wants this re-opened then alert on a post and request it.