SevenCity Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Okay, so as the OP, or original poster I would love to say, thank you to everyone for their replies and for their honesty. It's very refreshing! I thought I would mention a couple things about myself that you may or may not find pertinent to this conversation. After high school ended I tried to attend college for a couple years without much thought given as to why I was going. I didn't know at the time what I wanted to do for a living. Although my father paid the bills there was no conversation with him or my mother about the need to take it seriously. Those years in college didn't amount to much except a lot of "withdrawals" and "F's" which left me with GPA under 1.0. I had all kinds of reasons to not go to class during that time, but looking back at them now I realize it was just the laziness of a 19 year old with no diirection. I knocked on my best friend's neighbor's door at twenty and started in the carpentry/construction business that day, I am still with that same company almost twenty years later. I am in my early 40's and around 36 I Decided to go back to school. I wanted to get my degree, for myself.. Seven years later, after 30 some classes my GPA is around 3.8( still have to retake a couple of those F's to replace them) I never recieved anything lower than an A in any class, or paper or test. It's a wonder what time does to us and our ambitions. I absolutely love school now and will continue to learn for the rest of my life. I am an internship away from my degree in Historic Preservation, a couple courses away from a degree in History as well, and I was also working on finishing up my Pre-reqs for Nursing school. I thought that school would be a better use of my time then coming home from work, cracking a beer and watching Tv, although I do find time to relax and have fun too. To those of you who think all blue-collar workers are "crass" and unintelligent I am sorry some of my brethren have made you feel this way. I don't curse, I shower ever day, I volunteer at a local hospital emergency room, work side jobs for myself in the evenings and weekends, I workout regularly and stay in shape, and actually enjoy "reading" albeit mostly non-fiction history/biographies. I enjoy the work I do as a carpenter, but I don't think it defines who I am. That is key there. A lot of people feel what they do defines them. Meanwhile, when they are dead, does any of the paper pushing mean anything to anyone? Nope. Though building something that lasts a century will. I work in a professional job to pay my bills and secure my future. I enjoy what I do but it is not who I am. I would be the same guy with the same interests if I didn't work in a professional environment. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Where I come from, carpenters own their own houses, boats, RVs, drive $80K new pickups, take vacations, etc. If you have a trade here, you are making the money. If you are a contractor, you make more that any doctor or lawyer. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 It's OK bro. I went to engineering school. It's not the gist, it's the appearances. Women like us around to fix stuff for them, I get that even to this day from friend's wives who married men who aren't 'handy', but lifestyle is what it's about for the subset who qualify on job or profession. If I did the same thing I do, but had 'Boeing' in front of it, chances improve. That's how it is. Mating is the most discriminitory and often rude ordeal many will go through. IMO, that's OK. Beneficial even. I like it when people act how they truly are. Honesty. Good on them. Link to post Share on other sites
SevenCity Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Where I come from, carpenters own their own houses, boats, RVs, drive $80K new pickups, take vacations, etc. If you have a trade here, you are making the money. If you are a contractor, you make more that any doctor or lawyer. The good ones around here do as well. I wonder though, is it perception of income or just liking a guy to have a "clean" job that makes women attracted to professionals? I admit, I get much more respect from people when I'm dressed for work than when I am in shorts and a t-shirt. When I was younger I was having a smoke at the train station on dress-down friday. This cop said "Hey buddy, you can't smoke here!" A few weeks later I was doing the same but dressed in a suit and another cop said "Excuse me sir, there is no smoking in here". OP - Another idea. Perhaps include a pic of you dressed up in a suit to show your fancy side? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Bastile Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 I admit, I get much more respect from people when I'm dressed for work than when I am in shorts and a t-shirt. Having tried many different types of clothes while approaching, the best I find is simple jeans and T-shirt. Accessorize with a nice watch (show some riches there). Can approach anybody with that look. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Okay, so as the OP, or original poster I would love to say, thank you to everyone for their replies and for their honesty. It's very refreshing! I thought I would mention a couple things about myself that you may or may not find pertinent to this conversation. After high school ended I tried to attend college for a couple years without much thought given as to why I was going. I didn't know at the time what I wanted to do for a living. Although my father paid the bills there was no conversation with him or my mother about the need to take it seriously. Those years in college didn't amount to much except a lot of "withdrawals" and "F's" which left me with GPA under 1.0. I had all kinds of reasons to not go to class during that time, but looking back at them now I realize it was just the laziness of a 19 year old with no diirection. I knocked on my best friend's neighbor's door at twenty and started in the carpentry/construction business that day, I am still with that same company almost twenty years later. I am in my early 40's and around 36 I Decided to go back to school. I wanted to get my degree, for myself.. Seven years later, after 30 some classes my GPA is around 3.8( still have to retake a couple of those F's to replace them) I never recieved anything lower than an A in any class, or paper or test. It's a wonder what time does to us and our ambitions. I absolutely love school now and will continue to learn for the rest of my life. I am an internship away from my degree in Historic Preservation, a couple courses away from a degree in History as well, and I was also working on finishing up my Pre-reqs for Nursing school. I thought that school would be a better use of my time then coming home from work, cracking a beer and watching Tv, although I do find time to relax and have fun too. To those of you who think all blue-collar workers are "crass" and unintelligent I am sorry some of my brethren have made you feel this way. I don't curse, I shower ever day, I volunteer at a local hospital emergency room, work side jobs for myself in the evenings and weekends, I workout regularly and stay in shape, and actually enjoy "reading" albeit mostly non-fiction history/biographies. I enjoy the work I do as a carpenter, but I don't think it defines who I am. If you don't already, I'd include most of this in your OLD profile. Not because I think you have to justify your profession, but it makes you sound like a very interesting and ambitious person. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 It's so dangerous to go down that route. Why as a professional myself I am more attracted toward men working with their hands that can build things? I know many women like me, professionals who much prefer a man that gets dirty during the day. There is a sense of devotion and loyalty in these men I have not found in professionals. Heh, I am not single, so I am not going down any roads. But in my experience, when it comes to sex appeal and chemistry, it's the well suited guys who tend to light my fire. As for devotion and loyalty, I have known the serial cheating business traveler, and the serial cheating foreman. I don't know that there is a direct correlation. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Good Morning everyone, So I would like to ask you all this question. What is the first thing you think of when your talking to a man you're just getting to know, and you ask him what he does for a living? He replies, " I work in construction, as a carpenter." . I'd be cool with that. Wish I had that kind of know-how. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Nice entertainment but guard against buying into it. I remember those dopey years well. The first inkling was in high school where I was one of maybe two guys who actually worked on their own cars (I restored mine) and the rest had parents buying them new or newer cars. Lifestyle. Accept it. We're all equal but some are more equal than others. Expect them to remind you of it. Link to post Share on other sites
knabe Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Maybe it's because of my own experience with thos who identify as carpenters, but I think "craftsman or artisan" when I think of carpentry. I know construction type carpentry can be different, but it still takes skill to build cabinets, etc. And actually hard work. It wouldn't bother me. I have graduate degrees and work in a professional field. My fiance is blue collar. We make about the same money. We fot very well. He may not have a wall of degrees, but he knows a LOT. And if you give him anything, he can fix or build it. No, he can't program or write like William Faulkner, but who the heck cares? He's kind of a Renaissance man, which I find extremely sexy. In addition, he has no beer belly, he's strong, his clothes don't cost more than mine, and he doesn't take longer than I do to get ready lolol And his hands....sigh. Don't give those wimpy, pale, soft hands in a man. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SammySammy Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 I grew up in a construction family. Though my siblings and I have degrees, we still work in the construction industry. I know how much good carpenters make because I've written the checks to pay them. I know the career you could have and how financially rewarding it can be. These women did you a favor. You don't want to spend any time with women that think the way they do. Remember, you're not looking to date all women. You really just need one. One knowledgeable, understanding, and supportive woman. Find her and the rest won't matter. Be thankful for the ones that eliminate themselves early without knowing you. It saves time and prevents you from having to break up with them later. Makes room for a smarter woman to take the place in your life. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Maggie4 Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Online dating is the world of judging books by its cover. It's like shopping in a bookstore where all of the books are sealed. You can only look at the covers (profiles). 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 I think there is someone for everyone. A man wearin a tool belt or a pair of greasy coveralls, rings my bell. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
tetrahedral Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Historically, "white collar" jobs were stable, well paying, and difficult to obtain. They were status indicators. "Blue collar" jobs were not. Today, this is no longer the case. The job market is flooded with people who have degrees. A large percentage of "unskilled labor" has been shifted from the physical realm to the digital realm. Assistants, etc. Furthermore, as we've transitioned into a service economy, "unskilled" service labor (hospitality, sales) has replaced "unskilled" product labor (construction, manufacturing). But people's class sensibilities about this stuff haven't caught up. That's why you have people like Gaeta's daughter making bank as skilled laborers. People are genuinely unaware that they can have a good life doing something that at first blush, they'd bin as "blue collar". 3 Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Hi Avarantor, I think it is a wonderful profession. Those women were probably snobs who have a poor view of trades, and misconceptions and stereotypes. Maybe they want a doctor or lawyer because they think it will sound impressive to other people. Many people really sum up a person by what they do (and their belief of the associated value or status with that job), which is very shallow as they miss out on getting to know who they are and what they think and stand for. So it's probably good that these girls have been honest and bailed instantly. Having said all that, it sounds like what you do is awesome. A good job and you're studying something really fascinating and important. I could relate to your story. Dropped out at 20yrs old as i had no direction, and years later wnt back with perfect scores. Anyway, I say keep trying and you'll find someone worthy, someome who takes interest in not just what you do, but who you are! There is nothing wrong with swiping right based on appearance, i think most people do. Because you mentioned you have other standards too. Link to post Share on other sites
Chilli Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 (edited) They wouldn't like what l do then , to hell with them, l wouldn't be interested in a girl that shallow either. But being in the trades here would be one of the best things you could be doing. Matter of fact ,here they did some survey thing, of course , don't they do one of those for everything now. And the tradesmen was the most popular choice of all with the ladies. Nice and fit , masculine , great pay. Edited June 23, 2017 by Chilli 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Chilli Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Weird though that, when l met gf , l really noticed she went through all this sorta list about her UNI and things she'd done , and then she sorta worked it into what she does for a living now. l remember thinking , sh@t she's actually a bit self conscious about what she does ,that's weird. But when we'd been together awhile later on , her job was a bit of a pain in the ass l must admit so l think she'd come across some attitude before. Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 These threads crack me up, for a variety of reasons.. For one...I think women discount blue collar guys only if they are average or below average looking...A blue collar worker that is genuinely good looking and has a good body, then it wont matter a damn.. And the assumption that these guys aren't intelligent is just as ridiculous as saying all accountants or financial analysts are intelligent...Some are and some aren't... Most of us in the trades are doing just fine....We own our companies..We live in nice houses, drive nice stuff, our bills are paid, we have big investment accounts and vacation homes and expensive toys..... One advantage we have is that most of us can do/fix anything...I mean, sure, another guy can buy stuff, or hire people....But there is a certain feeling of true independence when you never need anyone for anything, and are never in the shyt if things go awry....I like that... Anyway... OP, you sound like a good guy...Don't worry about those judgemental women..They can do whatever they want, it wont be your loss, believe me... TFY 1 Link to post Share on other sites
soyou Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Yes I've vanished or stopped responding with 4 guys after knowing that they're carpenters, My reasons are simple and personal. I cant tell for all: 1. I'm a business owner and well-educated. I have a certain lifestyle that not everyone can afford or be comfortable with. Carpenters where I live dont make much so there is a huge gap in term of incomes. 2. Intellectual level - our professions are so different so it is hard to communicate and share deeper opnions or to understand each other. I'm more into good and deep conversations. I dated a few blue collors in the past. It didnt work out for all of the reason I listed above. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 These threads crack me up, for a variety of reasons.. For one...I think women discount blue collar guys only if they are average or below average looking...A blue collar worker that is genuinely good looking and has a good body, then it wont matter a damn.. And the assumption that these guys aren't intelligent is just as ridiculous as saying all accountants or financial analysts are intelligent...Some are and some aren't... Most of us in the trades are doing just fine....We own our companies..We live in nice houses, drive nice stuff, our bills are paid, we have big investment accounts and vacation homes and expensive toys..... One advantage we have is that most of us can do/fix anything...I mean, sure, another guy can buy stuff, or hire people....But there is a certain feeling of true independence when you never need anyone for anything, and are never in the shyt if things go awry....I like that... Anyway... OP, you sound like a good guy...Don't worry about those judgemental women..They can do whatever they want, it wont be your loss, believe me... TFY This. Very sexy. I don't think I could ever date a man who had to hire someone to fix everything. I'm already very good at that myself! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Chilli Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 These threads crack me up, for a variety of reasons.. For one...I think women discount blue collar guys only if they are average or below average looking...A blue collar worker that is genuinely good looking and has a good body, then it wont matter a damn.. And the assumption that these guys aren't intelligent is just as ridiculous as saying all accountants or financial analysts are intelligent...Some are and some aren't... Most of us in the trades are doing just fine....We own our companies..We live in nice houses, drive nice stuff, our bills are paid, we have big investment accounts and vacation homes and expensive toys..... One advantage we have is that most of us can do/fix anything...I mean, sure, another guy can buy stuff, or hire people....But there is a certain feeling of true independence when you never need anyone for anything, and are never in the shyt if things go awry....I like that... Anyway... OP, you sound like a good guy...Don't worry about those judgemental women..They can do whatever they want, it wont be your loss, believe me... TFY Wish l could triple like this one ,spot on man , well said. l'm self employed in the trades and l get heaps of time off all the time, good money , don't answer to anyone and l'm really good with my hands, got two properties.And that's after just going through divorce , if not for that l wouldn't even have to work at all really these days. Just shoot me if l had to sit in an office all day and never see the sunshine , staring at a computer screen, no thanks. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 This. Very sexy. I don't think I could ever date a man who had to hire someone to fix everything. I'm already very good at that myself! Im a business owner, but I do have to "get my hands dirty" once in a while...I have big/meaty and powerful hands...I shake a lot of hands...I have some guys that I greet, where their soft little hand just gets swallowed up on a handshake...Then sometimes I think....I wonder what that guys wife/gf must think about that.... TFY 2 Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 What is the first thing you think of when your talking to a man you're just getting to know, and you ask him what he does for a living? He replies, " I work in construction, as a carpenter." Is your first thought a negative one, or positive? My initial reaction: Admiration. Jesus was a carpenter. :love: Harrison Ford (smmmmokin' hot) started out as a carpenter. It's such a clean, wholesome, creative, awesome skill. And it builds up the muscles in your forearms. Yummy!! I get the question we all hear at some point..."what do you for work?" I reply through text, " I am a Carpenter" or "I work in construction, as a carpenter." Either way I word it, the result is the same. They vanish after that conversation and I never hear from them again. What age range are you hunting in? I smell gold-diggers. My take - let 'em vanish. Bullets dodged! She's out there somewhere. You just have to keep hunting til you find her. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 i dont know why women would be turned off at your profession its a gifted one..to turn a rough block of wood into something beautiful or to add construction to the mix....personally(guessing) means to me you are a hard worker who enjoys his work,most carpenters are passionate about their wood...do you do major construction?.like huge apartment blocks or business buildings... or more sedate homes.... maybe the women are greenies....do you replant...truthfully it would interest me..woodwork at school and technical drawing i actually really enjoyed..im a a bit of a chameleon though.....i would probably hammer quite a few questions at you and wouldnt fob you off.....maybe they arent the right type of women in the first place....consider yourself blessed.....deb 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Im a business owner, but I do have to "get my hands dirty" once in a while...I have big/meaty and powerful hands...I shake a lot of hands...I have some guys that I greet, where their soft little hand just gets swallowed up on a handshake...Then sometimes I think....I wonder what that guys wife/gf must think about that.... TFY Haha! After my divorce the first person I dated had very small feminine hands (which he even poked fun of himself). Despite how much I despise my ex-husband, I have to say during that time I did kinda miss his strong rough hands! Regarding the comment made about intelligence gaps just a bit ago, I have to disagree (but recognize perhaps I'm not AS educated/intelligent as the woman who posted it ). The last man I dated, for 10 months, owns his own contracting business. He did not go to college and he would say that I am way smarter than he is. But, I'm not. I know things he doesn't, specifically about technology, current events, and pop culture, but he is way smarter than I am about history and politics. He's not wealthy by any means, but he's GOOD with money, and to me that was more important than the size of his bank account. (Our relationship ended but it had nothing to do with his profession ) 3 Link to post Share on other sites
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