How do you find living alone ?

[Chilli]

Yeah right , you'd def' need the space as a muso wouldn't you.

l was an artist for a long time and l worked best with art sh@t sprawled all over the house, floors,everywhere, a lotta loud music and l preferred working all nighters rather than day.

So l was one pain in the ass to live with let me tell ya, Hardly used the studio, the house worked best. But w was a night shift nurse so it kinda worked out.

 

Strangely enough, l don't like loads of friends or people around me, except in say a partying/club or whatever sitch, then l love crowds.

Done my own thing all my life, need my space far more than most.

But this is the first time really,when l haven't had a gf or then married later and l must admit , that's the stuff l find hard about this.

Although back when l was an artist l often thought an artist really needs to live on their own. Shame l'm not still doing that haha.

 

ps ,Hi Lonely , hey, maybe it's time to recover that kitchen floor. Funny,l'm no good with flooring , could use your tips haha

Edited July 30, 2017 by Chilli

[Eternal Sunshine]

I have always loved living alone. Even when I was in relationships, I looked forward to non-date nights so that I can watch what I want, spread out in my big comfy bed or stay up till 3am doing whatever.

 

Having said that, I have always lived in inner city apartments, in lively neighbourhoods. The key for me is having friends and doing something with them at least 1x a week. I also have lots of social interaction at work daily.

 

I see my home as a place of peace and comfort where I can relax completely and recharge. I could happily live alone for the rest of my life.

[Chilli]

Yeah right, good for you.

So do you think you'd ever get married or prefer not too.?

 

But yeah , one thing about my place, although l'm still not use to coming home to no one else in it but on the other hand too, that can be just beautiful can't it.

My place is real refuge like, in a way it's just the total chill , can be beautiful getting home.

Gotta get it a bit more comfy yet though but it's coming along.

Great bed, great couch , great sound system l can play as loud as l want, so slowly getting there,

[rushed]

I remember shortly after I separated, getting ready to go out for a ten mile run. Before my long runs I'd always tell my then husband where I'd be running and about what time he could expect me back (so he knew to come looking for me if I wasn't back in case something happened). Well, with him no longer around I didn't know what to do. There was no one to tell, and that was the loneliest feeling ever. I think I wound up texting my mom that time, and for future runs I just left a note on my kitchen counter with my route and the time I left (for the police in case something happened to me on my run. I was a wee bit paranoid of getting hit by a car or attacked by a psycho.) But I still remember looking out through the window before my run that morning thinking, "I've got no one to look out for me." And it felt lonely and weird and sad.

[Blanco]

You all are nuts. Living alone is great, assuming you keep a healthy social life that prevents you from sitting in your apartment every night with a bowl of Frosted Flakes.

 

I'm convinced more relationships would last if the people didn't live together.

[truthtripper]

Yeah right , you'd def' need the space as a muso wouldn't you.

l was an artist for a long time and l worked best with art sh@t sprawled all over the house, floors,everywhere, a lotta loud music and l preferred working all nighters rather than day.

So l was one pain in the ass to live with let me tell ya, Hardly used the studio, the house worked best. But w was a night shift nurse so it kinda worked out.

 

Strangely enough, l don't like loads of friends or people around me, except in say a partying/club or whatever sitch, then l love crowds.

Done my own thing all my life, need my space far more than most.

But this is the first time really,when l haven't had a gf or then married later and l must admit , that's the stuff l find hard about this.

Although back when l was an artist l often thought an artist really needs to live on their own. Shame l'm not still doing that haha.

 

ps ,Hi Lonely , hey, maybe it's time to recover that kitchen floor. Funny,l'm no good with flooring , could use your tips haha

Perhaps you should do some art stuff when the lonely feelings creep in.

 

I love nightclub crowds too. Too bad it can't be like that at home

Edited July 31, 2017 by truthtripper

[littleblackheart]

I lived under the same roof as my ex husband for 7 years, who is the only man I lived with, and with him I experienced true loneliness, that is sharing your life with someone who doesn't care whether you are alive or dead.

 

I have children so I don't live alone now but I already know I will be perfectly happy living alone once they fly the nest, because I was very content on my own before I was married, I like having my own space to recharge and do things in my own time in peace, and 'll never feel as lonely as I did when I was married.

 

Moral of the story: it's better to live alone than with bad company!

[Tribble]

I live alone and have done for some time. For the most part, I love it. Everything is where I left it, the only mess to clean up belongs to me (or the bunny), I can make my own decisions and I know exactly what food is in the house. I had a great day on Sunday gardening. It looks lovely now and I did that by myself, for myself, with the flowers I wanted.

 

I am going through a lonely patch right now though. The hardest part is the nights alone. Seeing my friends and knowing they are going home to a warm house with their partners. But that's not really a living alone thing so much as a single thing. I spend every night alone and that can get really tough and lonely. Also, coming home and knowing there is no-one to talk to can sometimes be hard. Cooking for only myself alone. I spend a lot of time alone because I live alone and work alone for the most part. I sometimes worry this is making me less tolerant of people. I also wonder if I'll ever be comfortable living with someone....

[Chilli]

Yeah , think l'm getting spoilt.

It's winter here, nights are cold, who can be bothered going out .

Day off , wk off actually,daughter and l went up the coast yesterday , today was sunny and l planned on just staying home and working on my new deck.

gf , ex now , was saying ahve you finished the deck yet, been at it for mths, nope, getting there.

WTF, Why not ?

ahh, so many jobs started l bounce about.

You finish one at a time.

Hmm, that's not a bad idea , might try that.

So l've been going at the deck for a wk now and today l finally got most of the floor on. Very very cool.

She was onto something , this finishing jobs off thing is not a bad idea. Few days should be done.

So tonight l threw on some music and went out and walked about on my finally almost finished new deck and l must say , l'm impressed .

Later made some tea and jumped into bed , freezing by now outside , and thought well , this isn't actually too bad really , not to bad at all.

 

But it would've been nice to have someone here to show off my master piece new deck too.

Edited August 1, 2017 by Chilli

[Chilli]

I lived under the same roof as my ex husband for 7 years, who is the only man I lived with, and with him I experienced true loneliness, that is sharing your life with someone who doesn't care whether you are alive or dead.

 

I have children so I don't live alone now but I already know I will be perfectly happy living alone once they fly the nest, because I was very content on my own before I was married, I like having my own space to recharge and do things in my own time in peace, and 'll never feel as lonely as I did when I was married.

 

Moral of the story: it's better to live alone than with bad company!

 

 

 

Yeah ,l hear ya, our last few yrs were very similar.

[truthtripper]

I wish my house was like this train

 

[whichwayisup]

One thing don't think l'll ever get use to and tbh l hope l don't have too.

Switching stuff off and locking up at night, going up to bed and then just being there , on my own, only one in the house.

Strangest feeling and l still have trouble with it most nights.

Can't imagine so many people must've been doing that forever.

Also can't imagine wealthy people living alone in monster houses and doing that.

Even if l was wealthy l'd still need a small cosey house.

 

Another thing that hits me a lot because l'm renovating , is there's no one to share the excitement with when you finally finish something like the deck l'm doing or make some small addition like the cool new shower head l've just put on.

Choosing colors is a pain in the ass too , l'm not too good with house interiors.

You ask friends and family to help you!

 

Fall asleep with the TV on and when you go out put the radio on that way when you get home there's some noise and not just silence.

[Chilli]

Have left stuff on for mths now ,it does help when you come in.

don't need any help with reno'g but interior , yeah, got a friend who's taste is similar adding her bit.

No dramas ,

[Chilli]

Almost forgot , my daughters got great ideas and taste too.

[Chilli]

Well l tell ya , at least my deck is looking damn good. Been so nice out there working on it this wk , forgetting about the sh@t.

l'm gonna be spoilt rotten when this puppies finished

 

ps , my kinda train TT .

[preraph]

I'm mostly good alone. I do go out to eat alone a lot and wish I had more friends available through the week to do that with, but I don't spend much time other than that or have time to spend with two jobs. One job is at home, though and it's perfect because I love my dogs most and they're my joy. It's always been animals that made me happiest since I was little. And music.

 

Like a day for me is wake up about 8:45, call into the office to see if I'm needed. If not, lay around another hour, drowse or watch tv, snuggle with dogs. Then if I do go to the office, I usually also go out to eat lunch on the way home and/or to the rec center gym to exercise my leg on the bike.

 

If I have any spare time, I might tweet and watch CNN or TLC a little or like this week, we had a light rain and everything was so beautiful and green in our neighborhood that I drove around taking photos and tweeting them. Or today I found the new location of a restaurant I liked and ate there and then wrote a review for my blog and added photos. Or I have also been swimming at the rec center pool floating on my tube some this summer.

 

Then I got to work at home and just finished and it's about 9:00 so I'm goofing around, doing my nails, having dinner and then to the TV and snuggling with dogs and doing a round of physical therapy for my leg.

 

I have months at at time I have no leisure because of work (especially the last few months when I was traveling out of state for PT), but I have more than usual leisure right now. So I neglected one of my friends during that real busy time and taking him to lunch tomorrow to make up for it a little.

 

My life was more fun when I was young, but this one could be worse in my 60s. I did join a meetup for other people without kids who like to go eat out and stuff. So I have done that twice and doing it again soon. It's still awkward taking a friendship out of the meeting because hard to know if you'd be getting into something you didn't like that would then ruin the meetup or who would be too high maintenance.

 

Life is what you make it and then of course the ongoing getting around obstacles to keep it on track.

[Steve51]

I have never lived alone. I lived with my parents until I was 18, joined the Army and lived with a lot of men. Then when I got back from Vietnam I lived with a girl. Then back with my parents for for less than a year. I saw my wife on a train and we got engaged in 3 weeks, married a few months later. I always liked to live with a woman. I tried living with some friends but that did not work out and I kicked them out and moved a girl I worked with in. I do not like living alone.

[SolG]

When I left home I lived communally through college and early in my career. Then I got married and lived with my H. We separated many years ago, and I've been lliving alone ever since. I love it!

 

My week days are busy with a routine of exercise and working a minimum of nine hours. I love getting home to me time. In summer I might do another workout or head to the beach. I rarely go out week nights unless it's a work thing.

 

I do however most week nights have phone/skype catchups with long distance friends/lovers. I have an interstate friend that I share a streaming service subscription with so we can watch Game of Thrones together. One night a week we phone in, watch an episode, then natter about it after.

 

Friday is usually my recharge night; unless there is something really enticing (like insistent friends or a promising date) you'll find me at home in my onsie and slippers with a face mask/hair treatment on reading a book.

 

Weekends are usually a blur of domestics and social activities (and the odd booty call). I live in an apartment in the CBD so there is always something going on and someone to do it with. I have one lover I spend one weekend a month with, and I try to visit my family once every eight weeks or so (both short flights away). My two best gfs and have a rotational arrangement where once a month we take turns hosting the others, host's choice of theme. We've had wine and cheese, bonfire night, pyjama party.. etc. Nothing like a night of catch up with wine and girl chat

 

I'm actually an ntrovert and really value my pockets of time alone and I love having a lot of freedom. So living on my own is perfect. The times where I have actually felt a poignant sense of loneliness have been while travelling alone, which I do frequently. I remember hiking in a national park in Asia and stopping and thinking how great it would be to share that with someone. But you can't have everything!

Edited August 5, 2017 by SolG

[Chilli]

Yeah l haven't lived alone either since teens when l first left home. One or two short stints early 20s.

 

Funny ,, l have an old mate here, he's actually about 70 but he only looks and seems in his 40s. Very cool dude.

But odd, in a good way, love odd people. He rides a Harley,dresses in leather, moves every 2yrs, has all his life, buys a place, stays 2 yrs, does nothing to it, doesn't even mow it , then he sells it, usually at a decent profit and moves.

He did only just break even on one place he was telling me yesterday, out of 25 or so he's owned. The rest he's still made enough to live on until e buys and sells again.

He doesn't so much sell about money though he just sells so that he can move again and live the way he likes too.

 

Classic guy , we often talk out on his deck by the fire all night and get drunk.

lt's a funny life he has but it's one of the things that make him what he is l guess.

Edited August 7, 2017 by Chilli

[kazen]

Being an introvert, having my own place and no one around is quite heavenly. Do as you please and a place to truly relax from the social dramas. But sometimes you need people to socialize with so you don't feel "alone". The best is make friends. I suggest getting a part time job at a workplace with people generally around your age, it helps to have good friends to can hang out with during the week or invite over sometimes. If you don't have time for another job, just attend classes on subject that interest you so you can meet new people. Go to church if you are religious. Or take up some hobbies where you will often see the same people. Or reconnect with old friends. Who knows maybe someone from your past is going through similar situations. As someone already mention, have a pet helps too.

[Chilli]

none of which are my thing man. l know people, only a few in this town itself but that's enough, but others too. l get plenty of invites and knock 90% of it back.

l do stuff when l feel like doing stuff, see people when l feel like seeing people, get drunk with some mates when l'm in the mood.

living alone has nothing to do with that stuff for me, doesn't cut it .

l'm use to living with my women , that's my issue.

mind you, l could go some partying , but everyone sits at home with the misses or their life of whatever it is.

But then hey , l gotta be crazy to want another women anyway , go figure.

 

Church , ahhh yeah , l'd probably burst into flames getting through the door l'm afraid.

but hey , single people that do do the church thing, must have a pretty good social life or opportunities to meet someone really among their own kind in the 100s every sunday mustn't they really.

Be alright if you were into it.

Edited August 8, 2017 by Chilli

[Chilli]

lt's weird really, if your a personality that can take or leave people in general and your not into too much friendy friendy stuff , there must be people everywhere just living and doing their own thing.

 

My ex gf now, had zero interest in friends and people at all, talking never. l do but onky when l feel like it but her , zero. She moved across the country on her own , knows not a soul , but couldn't care less,

She's a partner person but not a people person.

She was tiny too and l often think of her now, this one tiny person , wondering about in a brand new state , just on her own , it woudn't even faze her.

[stixx]

Does it still work if l have a coffee first !

But yeah ,l do feel the loneliness for sure. l should be grateful that l actually have some free wkends now though with my daughter doing a lot of the friends things these days. Never had free wkends for 3 1/2 yrs so it's not all bad haha but l do miss her for sure.

 

But yeah the relationship intimacy thing and the fun of it and the sharing, people are talking about for sure too.

That's a much bigger thing to me and why friends and just people don't really cut it for me.

 

A few posts in and I can say I dont feel lonely(i think). Just the simple companionship.

 

I never glob on to a woman and smother her. I dont want that insecure behavior back.

 

Its just the simple stuff that matters to me. Holding hands and hugs. I hate klingy. Im very simple in real life.

 

I miss the road trips actually. Road trips and snuggies on a small vacation s a bit of a booster over the years. I never realized it until I though about it.

 

Road trip snuggies i just coined right here, right now(its not a Van Halen spoof,,,though it may sound like it - ha)

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

A few posts in and I can say I dont feel lonely(i think). Just the simple companionship.

 

I never glob on to a woman and smother her. I dont want that insecure behavior back.

 

Its just the simple stuff that matters to me. Holding hands and hugs. I hate klingy. Im very simple in real life.

 

I miss the road trips actually. Road trips and snuggies on a small vacation s a bit of a booster over the years. I never realized it until I though about it.

 

Road trip snuggies i just coined right here, right now(its not a Van Halen spoof,,,though it may sound like it - ha)

 

Road trip snuggies lol! I definitely miss that, too. I'd say I miss road trip surprises more than snuggies, although the snuggies are good too .

[Chilli]

Ex w and l traveled and lived on the road 50% of the time 12 yrs , yep , 12 yrs.

not talking a few wks a yr here, 12 yrs.

l know a lot about 1,000s and 1,000s of miles in road trips.

My fav was when we'd wanna be on the road at 3am. god l loved those starts,

No traffic, few trucks, still pitch black and o we'd go.

One night we were heading down sth next morng, 2,300 k , think that's about 1500 miles.

We went out the night before partied it up, got 4hrs sleep drunk,git up and then drove 17hours straight down to the new state,

The reason we drove straight through wa s l'd contracted a really bad ear infection and there was a specialist where we were goig but unfortunately l still lost all hearing in that ear , stone deaf now on the right side

Yep , l know all about road trips , very cool.

Edited August 9, 2017 by Chilli