Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 You could just tell.... he maybe thought I was too good for him.... not that I did . Link to post Share on other sites
MountainGirl111 Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Ah, the truth comes out. He really didn't feel good enough for you. So, he found another chick, made sure you knew and then rubbed it in as much as possible. He feels inferior to you because you have a nicer car? Do you think he is somehow ashamed of his profession? That would be sad too. No one should be ashamed of what they do for a living. Work is work. Many people are just thankful to have a job and there is merit in working hard. Oh, that's sad that someone would let that trip them up. A car is a piece of machinery. That's all. It depreciates; loses it's value quickly over time and then eventually stops running. It's just a way to get from point A to point B. He should be proud of his old pick up. Old pick ups are cool! I'll never figure out what makes some people feel so bad about themselves for. Feeling like they are never good enough. Most people really ARE good enough. They just don't know it. I'm sorry you've been so hurt by this. Link to post Share on other sites
MountainGirl111 Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 You could just tell.... he maybe thought I was too good for him.... not that I did . Of course you didn't think you were too good for him! He just assumed that...he took that on himself. You were in love with the guy, obviously or you wouldn't be so upset. He didn't see that. He just felt inferior and that is what eventually dictated his behaviors. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Its okay mountain girl I know I shouldnt. And I am getting over him or the idea of him. Im almost positive he tried to hurt me because he felt inadequate not that this is something to help me deal but it only makes sense. He has 2 kids one from his ex and the other one a child she abandoned. He came over with intentions to make things work but I could tell several times he was bringing up insecurities... I think he thought I had a problem with him having kids.. He owns a business and I told him theres nothing wrong with your car.... I do believe he tried to hurt me with this new girl whether it was cloud 9 or not there is a discrepant way to tell thingss. Not to mention we hadnt talked in 24 hours and I had a feeling things were fading out but he made a point to send me that nasty text and rub the salt in. He shouldve just faded out. Who wants to be with a guy with so many psychological issues though. I look past material things but I suppose... some men have issues. I dont know. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Yep now that its too late he knows I cared. Link to post Share on other sites
MountainGirl111 Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Men are real strange when it comes to their cars and machinery and stuff. I don't know what the big deal is about cars either. My ex husband was IN LOVE with cars!! Honestly, I really try to shy away from getting caught up in materialistic stuff. Some of it's nice, but a lot of it depreciates. There are a few possessions of mine that do NOT depreciate. Ironically, the older those two things are and MORE they are used, the BETTER their VALUE. Isn't that funny? Here's the deal, girl> You've got to love yourself no matter what and believe in yourself. Because at the end of the day or end of the "time" you live with yourself 24/7/365. Others may forsake you, but you've got yourself. What is it you truly VALUE? Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Mountaingirl your so right. He has foresaken me so badly and who knows why It hurts the most because of the conversation we had.. the good times.. the connection he even admitted to. Then to see him be so cruel on purpose it is bound to leave anyone confused except wondering.... why are you rubbing this in. Could I be correct? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Vareg Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Well I was shocked couldnt even do my work... Leave it there, move on 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Well since you are sure he was purposely trying to hurt you it should be easier to get over him and move on. No one wants to be with someone who purposely hurt them. We live and we learn. It sounds like he did you a favor and you can do better to find a nicer guy. Good luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 He most likely did try to hurt me but I take solace in the fact I am almost sure when this is over he will resurface. And at least I will have the strength to say beat it. Ill bet itll be way down the road and..... in the meantime its getting easier to take. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Agreed there are 4 things keeping me going 1 hes not for me things work out for the best 2 karma gets people who inflict this stuff on people 3 he has a sexual past that is bad full of hookups he told me who wants that kinda man 4 chances are hell screw up this new relationship and he may or may not contact me... hope fully by then ill say sorry i met a guy thats not a loser with no baggae that has more money than you.... ouch to a man s ego. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 So something even worse just happened. I was driving in a drivethrough and I guess wasnt paying attentiom and some a hole police officer started telling me off and I started crying uncontrollably. I guess because of everythibg lately.... god. Link to post Share on other sites
MountainGirl111 Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Krista, I'm sorry you're going through this. I know how it feels when someone has tried to inflict pain on you. It really hurts, hon, it really does. So, with the infliction of pain comes wounds. And with wounds comes the need for healing. The mending up takes time. Time, time time. Hurting people hurt people. He tried to hurt you and it appears he was successful. But it doesn't end there. It just doesn't. Your life will go on and you will heal from this, I firmly believe that. When you are "smarting" from the pain, it's so easy to want to inflict pain back somehow. But, that is not the answer to any of this. The inflicting of pain needs to stop. You'll never heal otherwise. Try not to be in a mind-set of "Karma" and wishing ill will on him. He was vindictive to you first, it sounds like, but you have a choice: You can take the high road and let it go; pick yourself up; dust yourself off and start again. And, life will be full of blessings. Another thought: When you feel "forsaken". It's a feeling that will pass. BUT: in the moments that you feel the most forsaken, there are angels that will come and comfort you. In that I firmly believe I've been comforted, seen this comfort given to many others and I've often been the "comforter" when others are at their lowest. Let it go, Krista, and you WILL be BLESSED!! I promise. Right now you've got to keep your head on straight. So you need to purge him from your thoughts somehow. I know that's easier said than done, but that's what you've got to do and concentrate on other things. Sending you a big hug. You can get through this, one day at a time. Don't look too far ahead; that cause you to future trip and can take away from the present. Stay in the present. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sweetgirl75 Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 It is hard to let go of pain and I can't help but wonder if this homeboy I was with prevented a blessing of a man from entering my life. I wasted over a year with him and I could have had a year of real love and commitment. I did go into a period of time where I wanted this guy to have the worst luck with women and have someone treat him like he treated me but then I realized why in the hell am I letting this jackass poor excuse of a man even in my thoughts. My thoughts became too valuable for this fool to be in my head . He sure isn't thinking of me so why am I thinking about him? I just think his loss not mine. Those other chicks can have him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Thanks mountain girl and sweet girl... the reality is..... any connection we had or I thought we had may have been in my head. Obviously hes feeling major feels for this person... its just too bad its been at my expense. I was talking to my sister today and she said thats one of the flaws with online dating... guys keep a lot of women on the string on there and.... in behind the scenes theyre still looking. She also said why on earth would you want someone that cant see you for the awesome pretty smart funny nice girl you are... Theres no way I would. Now that I let all that pain out by crying I do not want revenge on him.. my revenge is knowing that I will never give him another chance ever. No matter what is said... and no matter if he f'es this one up royally. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sweetgirl75 Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 You are welcome! Sometimes all we need is a good cry. It is what keeps me from slapping the crap out of someone just kidding! Tears are cleansing and refreshes your mind and soul. Sisters are awesome! My Sis has been there for me so many times. Don't settle for less than you deserve. Keep alert because homeboy might get word or it seems like these jokers have a radar that knows when a woman is moving on. Don't make the mistakes I did and find it flattering because they come back. It is an ego stroke for them and they hit a dry spell. I so wish I would have known about the crap he would pull a year ago. It has made me a stronger better person. Yes the best revenge is you do well in your life and no turning back to homeboy or my favorite word jackass. There may be other days you may cry too and that's okay. Just spend less time thinking about him and soon he will be just a nobody. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Exactly soon he wont matter. Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 (edited) Echoing what someone else said, try to date local. It's not that it can't work out, it's just that a lot of the time these guys are looking for casual from afar meanwhile stay 'shopping' for something close by. I'm glad if this thing he's got ends (and trust me, it will. This man is clearly emotionally shallow with not much grasp on what meaningful relationships entail "sry found someone closer who gives great sex. She's the one":rolleyes:) you don't plan on taking the guy back if he does try. Im not sure he will but it'll be more hurt. Edited May 10, 2017 by Cookiesandough Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Thankyou cookies and dough. Your definately right. The guys terrible. Im probably lucky. He got someone closer. And after he said those mean things to me..... I am pretty sure he wont be back. I dont know how he'd think he could. Sad part is I have a feeling I am not the first girl he's run this game on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 10, 2017 Author Share Posted May 10, 2017 Sweetgirl I am sorry you were strung along but its often really hard to run away from how you feel. If you care for someone you want them in your life. Dont beat your self up because in the end he doesnt get you.. Your right...the nobody feelings already arriving. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 when we first started talking I made a couple comments about how he had kids.... I said somethin like hows roofin to him because he does concrete roofing tile and I am thinking maybe he felt.... These are a no-no. A BIG no-no. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 11, 2017 Author Share Posted May 11, 2017 Thank you but not not overweight or at all unattractive. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 11, 2017 Author Share Posted May 11, 2017 Echoing what someone else said, try to date local. It's not that it can't work out, it's just that a lot of the time these guys are looking for casual from afar meanwhile stay 'shopping' for something close by. I'm glad if this thing he's got ends (and trust me, it will. This man is clearly emotionally shallow with not much grasp on what meaningful relationships entail "sry found someone closer who gives great sex. She's the one":rolleyes:) you don't plan on taking the guy back if he does try. Im not sure he will but it'll be more hurt. Thanks cookiesanddough...wost part is I think hr really does like this girl because he hasn't been "looking" online in a lonnng time for him anyways. Worst part is he told me he liked me... Ive come to terms that chances are hes good and gone forever. I just hope hes happy with what he did to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 11, 2017 Author Share Posted May 11, 2017 These are a no-no. A BIG no-no. Who knows.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author krista28 Posted May 12, 2017 Author Share Posted May 12, 2017 They seem to now be together and I dont know what this girl has that I dont... Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts