She doesn't want exclusivity?

[salparadise]

 

last online at 4:24pm; 12:30am; 8:51am.

 

I know it sounds crazy that I'm looking at these times. But given the whole scenario of things I suppose I feel like I'm still in self protection mode and keeping my eyes open. I don't want to have to feel like this.

 

But this is different because we just became 'exclusive'.

 

More examples of the words saying one thing and actions saying the exact opposite. In that conversation you quoted, she sensed what you were feeling and decided a bit of love bombing was in order... making sure the line was taught and reeling you in a little more.

 

Something is not congruent about this whole scenario. You're right to be in self-protection mode. Is she seeing that you're visiting her profile each time, or do you have visitors turned off? I don't think that you should bring up the okc stuff. You should go Incognito and let her think you've deleted your profile so you can observe her activity. It's serving as a thermometer to gauge her actual motivations, and keep you from being bamboozled completely.

 

This thing about not having been inside her place is weird too. Next time you're dropping her off, ask if you can go in to use the bathroom or something... I bet you'll get an assortment of excuses.

 

I hate to see a sincere man being played like a fiddle. I hope I'm wrong, but there is too much that just doesn't pass the sniff test.

Edited April 9, 2017 by salparadise

[Crosswords]

Ya, if there ever is another time I'll do the bathroom thing. Try to get up there. Something is so off with everything. I dunno.

She asked to move in so soon and has said words that are incredibly sweet. On Friday when we hung out she said "you're so precious to me" twice and was very sweet the whole night. Initiated hugs, and kisses. Lifted up my shirt, kissed my chest. Ugh I dunno it's so confusing I've never had this before.

 

We were supposed to hangout on Sunday. But she forgot she had made plan to attains a "Passover dinner". She apologized profusley. Didn't suggest another day this week to see me.. no goodmorning or goodnight texts like she has done in the past.

 

I texted her this morning saying "goodmorning how was the Passover dinner?" And haven't received a response yet. It's been 2 hours. I think I'm dead in the water here. And for the life of me have to clue why!

 

One idea I had was that maybe she just wanted to move in to my place temporarily, and use me for that.. and when I said I didn't know if it was the best move she just lost her objective and has pulled back. And now she's just hoping I take a hint and bugger off?

[Mkn1010]

I think she just relishes in the attention... but does not want to truly invest herself! She's operating on shallow emotions and just doing what feels good and keeps you on the hook. I think this is classic behaviour from someone who hasn't healed from past relationship trauma. And she's on the way out probably just as fast as she arrived! People who burn hot, burn out with feelings and can completely lose interest overnight. Again, it's because they've been operating on shallow emotions (unlike you, as you are taking it all as meaningful).

[Renae]

I dated a guy who.....

Took me out to real dates, not just hanging at home.

Texted me all day everyday.

Called me almost every other night

I spent the night at his house and had a drawer of my things there.

He refered to his house as home,I had a key, a side of the bed, and he kept all my favorites food and drinks there for me.

I met his friends, his family, coworkers, and he met all mine.

He took my kids on vacation with his friends' family.

He took me on a 12 day vacation with his family to Hawaii.

We spent half the week together, sometimes more.

He treated me amazingly, when he looked at me I thought he loved me, I felt a connection with him that I had never felt with someone else, I felt like he just got me.

 

And all the other women he was seeing at the same time would tell you the same thing. A health nut he was also dating would tell you he only ate healthly food, yet he ate all the fried food with me. He knows a ton of mixed drinks because he always wants whichever girl he is with favorite drink. It's not about just sex. For him it's the fear of being alone, off connecting with someone and losing them, or missing out on someone better. Some people are really good at giving the impression they are in love. What they love is how you love them. I gave him the contitional love he looked for his whole life.

 

I know he was dating me and mutliple other women. I made a million excuses for him. He had a really hard upbringing. But it comes down to what do you want and deserve. Trust me. I spent 1.5 yrs with him, it's only been what a few months for you. Get out now before it just gets harder. You know something is off and you should listen to that.

Edited April 13, 2017 by Renae

[Crosswords]

I dated a guy who.....

Took me out to real dates, not just hanging at home.

Texted me all day everyday.

Called me almost every other night

I spent the night at his house and had a drawer of my things there.

He refered to his house as home,I had a key, a side of the bed, and he kept all my favorites food and drinks there for me.

I met his friends, his family, coworkers, and he met all mine.

He took my kids on vacation with his friends' family.

He took me on a 12 day vacation with his family to Hawaii.

We spent half the week together, sometimes more.

He treated me amazingly, when he looked at me I thought he loved me, I felt a connection with him that I had never felt with someone else, I felt like he just got me.

 

And all the other women he was seeing at the same time would tell you the same thing. A health nut he was also dating would tell you he only ate healthly food, yet he ate all the fried food with me. He knows a ton of mixed drinks because he always wants whichever girl he is with favorite drink. It's not about just sex. For him it's the fear of being alone, off connecting with someone and losing them, or missing out on someone better. Some people are really good at giving the impression they are in love. What they love is how you love them. I gave him the contitional love he looked for his whole life.

 

I know he was dating me and mutliple other women. I made a million excuses for him. He had a really hard upbringing. But it comes down to what do you want and deserve. Trust me. I spent 1.5 yrs with him, it's only been what a few months for you. Get out now before it just gets harder. You know something is off and you should listen to that.

 

That's a pretty crazy story!

 

Maybe you're right though. Nothing makes sense in this whole scenerio of mine.