She doesn't want exclusivity?

[Crosswords]

If I were in your situation. I would wait and let her make the call! I do know one thing for a fact and that's what I stated above....if you're coming across as too clingy, that will push her away. Women like to know that you're interested but not THAT interested...especially at first.

 

As far as you dating others, if I were you, I definitely would date others, considering she doesn't want to be exclusive right now. Who knows, you may find someone that you like better that is ready to be exclusive.

 

If you're still seeing one another in a couple of months, that should be ample time to have that conversation again, IF you think it's a possibility on her end as well and if she's stopped dating others.

 

How long was your previous relationship? And I take it you're completely over your last gf?

 

Okay, we last texted yesterday at 6pm. Nothing today. I will wait for her to make plans or reach out first. And I suppose plan dates with some other people. Even though I don't REALLY want to, but I should keep my schedule busy. I just won't be intimate with others I guess.

 

I'm completely over my ex. And our relationship lasted just shy of two years

[mightycpa]

If she didn't have strong feelings for me, why would she tell me she sees me in her future, imitates hand holding, kissing, and sex?

She may very well have strong feelings for you, but after 7 dates, there is no way she (or you) can know if these are LASTING feelings, which by now you ought to know is the only thing that counts, and for which there are no guarantees. So if by this:

I'm believing her when she has brought up on multiple occasions that she has stated 'I see myself getting married to you' 'you would be a great dad', etc

you mean that you believe she feels that way NOW, ok. But if you believe that this is more than just words at this point, you are being awfully foolish.

 

Don't drink the Kool Aid quite yet.

[Life lessons]

Okay, we last texted yesterday at 6pm. Nothing today. I will wait for her to make plans or reach out first. And I suppose plan dates with some other people. Even though I don't REALLY want to, but I should keep my schedule busy. I just won't be intimate with others I guess.

 

I'm completely over my ex. And our relationship lasted just shy of two years

 

Lol. I know waiting is difficult! You never know, you may find someone else you really like and wants to be exclusive.....but, If you don't want to date others, then don't. Lol.....I do think you're doing the right thing in not reaching out to her though..... Hopefully she'll reach out to you. does she work in the afternoons? I'm asking because if she does, that may prevent her from texting you...or are both your work schedules during the day! I guess what I'm saying is there are certain situations in regards to scheduling that could cause an issue, as far as communicating.

 

Hopefully she's over her ex as well.

[spiderowl]

I've been in this exact same situation with a guy where I haven't been rushing to meet anyone else. I am being exclusive with him in practice, but don't want to feel I have to have 'rules' too early on. It takes me a while to figure out what I feel about a guy. My interest in him was growing but I had been single for a while and did not want to feel someone was stepping in and taking me over. It did not meet I would date others.

 

I would give her a bit more time to see how her feelings go. I don't think it necessarily means you are a placeholder. When I was in your girl's situation, I was glad he mentioned that he did not want to date anyone else or sleep with anyone else, that reassured me, but I did not do the right thing and reassure him. However, neither did I cheat or even consider it, so I think you can bide your time here a bit and see if her feelings develop towards you. If you feel you cannot trust her, then back off a bit. From what you have said, she is not looking to date anyone else at the moment.

[Life lessons]

She may very well have strong feelings for you, but after 7 dates, there is no way she (or you) can know if these are LASTING feelings, which by now you ought to know is the only thing that counts, and for which there are no guarantees. So if by this:

you mean that you believe she feels that way NOW, ok. But if you believe that this is more than just words at this point, you are being awfully foolish.

 

Don't drink the Kool Aid quite yet.

 

I agree! I think it's way too early to have really strong feelings...well that are true. But hey, im not one of the ones that believe in love at first site either...so I could be wrong! But a month is definitely not enough time to know someone well. They know what you are projecting and of course that's going to be the good qualities.

[Jj66]

To me a commitment to exclusivity is not the same as a long term commitment. I could commit to exclusivity with someone and then break up with her tomorow without a second thought. The thing is: it's hard to back off the exclusivity commitment afterwards without causing a breakup. When you tell your partner I'd like to start seeing other people, it usually isn't received too well. Because of this I'd view a commitment to exclusivity as a promise to not see other people until we break up but with no assurances about how long things might last. I wouldn't commit to exclusivity unless I either A) really liked someone and wanted to see how it played out before seeing anyone else; or B) didn't see them as possible relationship material. B isn't that crazy when you think about it. You've got an exclusive sexual partner for the time being and you can end things as soon as someone catches your fancy.

[OatsAndHall]

She's telling you she's keeping her options open. She doesn't have strong feelings for you that's pretty obvious...time to move on.

 

She stated that she could see him as her husband and having children with him but then said that she wants to date other people as well... So, I can see why he is befuddled.

 

Personally, I wouldn't be befuddled at all. I wouldn't be dating a woman who brought up marriage after seven dates...

[Crosswords]

Lol. I know waiting is difficult! You never know, you may find someone else you really like and wants to be exclusive.....but, If you don't want to date others, then don't. Lol.....I do think you're doing the right thing in not reaching out to her though..... Hopefully she'll reach out to you. does she work in the afternoons? I'm asking because if she does, that may prevent her from texting you...or are both your work schedules during the day! I guess what I'm saying is there are certain situations in regards to scheduling that could cause an issue, as far as communicating.

 

Hopefully she's over her ex as well.

 

Ya she usually works until 2pm, so she's quite free afterwards. All I know is she just hasn't reached out. But she did say 'I miss you yesterday' to which I responded 'yeah? What do you miss about me?' And she responded with 'all of you'

[Life lessons]

Ya she usually works until 2pm, so she's quite free afterwards. All I know is she just hasn't reached out. But she did say 'I miss you yesterday' to which I responded 'yeah? What do you miss about me?' And she responded with 'all of you'

 

Are you typically the first to make contact with her? Did she text that she missed you out of the blue or were you two texting one another when she said it? Not that it matters...well it kinda does to me. lol if someone text me out of the blue and said "I miss you", I would be like awwww...they really do miss me. Lol. But to me, it always meant more when I got the I miss you text randomly.

 

I don't know what time zone you're in, but you should still have several hours until it's "too late", so wait and see if she reaches out. If not, then see how tomorrow pans out.

[OatsAndHall]

"Exclusivity" is simple for me. We just don't date other people. We don't make plans to move in together, we don't talk about marriage and children, etc etc.. We move at a slow pace and see if a quality relationship can develop. If one party decides that it's not going to work the so be it. But, you're calling it off with someone without the confounding variable of other men/women involved.

[Crosswords]

Are you typically the first to make contact with her? Did she text that she missed you out of the blue or were you two texting one another when she said it? Not that it matters...well it kinda does to me. lol if someone text me out of the blue and said "I miss you", I would be like awwww...they really do miss me. Lol. But to me, it always meant more when I got the I miss you text randomly.

 

I don't know what time zone you're in, but you should still have several hours until it's "too late", so wait and see if she reaches out. If not, then see how tomorrow pans out.

 

Generally she usualky texts me first. Although I usually make the plans. Although she drops the 'i work until 2 and then I'm free afterwards' style. But she doesn't do the 'let's go here friday'.

 

The I miss you text came mid conversation.

 

and yesterday I already responded to her I miss you text..

 

Last contact was this at 6pm yesterday..

 

*i sent her a networking contact for her field of work*

 

Her: 'Awe thank you!!!"

Me: 'you're welcome'

Her: 'I miss you'

Me:'Yeah? What do you miss about me?'

Her: 'All of you'

Me:'Mm, you're sweet'

Her: 'Thnkx'

 

And there hasn't been contact since

[mightycpa]

As long as I'm giving out great advice, you know, you have an opportunity to be different with the whole texting thing. The problem with texting is that you're doing flirting and bantering and nobody wants to be the last one to text. That's the person who's always wondering "why didn't I get a text back?"

 

Surprise her every once in a while. She texts you, you call her back and say something nice she can hear. That way, when you say goodbye, nobody's wondering if they're going to get the next snippet.

 

Plus, by texting all that playful stuff, you're cheating yourself out of the anticipation that builds when you don't see each other. You'd do well to set a low-text expectation somehow. I know that's tough these days.

[Life lessons]

Okay...that's good that she usually initiates the contact first. I didn't realize that! Maybe she's just hesitant about making plans this early in the...I'll say this loosely...relationship.

 

Don't mention anything about going anywhere when you two have the next conversation. That way it'll give her a chance to mention this. Maybe she's shy or just not had the opportunity to mention it yet...? Leave it open and see if she makes a suggestion.

[preraph]

She's keeping her options open. There could be some guy she has hopes for that may never materialize. Most women I know usually had some guy they were hoping for who usually never amounted to anything.

[Crosswords]

I agree with that. This is why I enerally don't text much. I usually use texting for making plans, following up, and maybe having a very small conversation. 7 lines max!

I prefer calling.

 

So should I wait for her to text me next? And then just casually repond?

[Crosswords]

She's keeping her options open. There could be some guy she has hopes for that may never materialize. Most women I know usually had some guy they were hoping for who usually never amounted to anything.

 

True. Especially at the age of 27. I'd say women are waiting for that Prince Charming and don't want to lock in to anything serious.. just in case.

[Crosswords]

I forgot to mention this!

Yesterday evening (3am - about 9 hours after our convo) she sent me a link to a one bedroom apartment. And she responded with a text that said 'want to move in together and split the cost?'

 

Note: she's currently couch surfing and is looking for a new place because she has until the end of the month.

I currently live alone in a bachelor.

[marksaysay]

I recently went through a very similar situation so I would say proceed with caution. In my case, I was strung a long for 3+ months because she wasn't "ready" for a relationship. Being a "plan b" or a placeholder is not something I will ever be again.

 

If I were you, I'd be careful. If a women really wants to be with someone, it'll be extremely evident. If she cancels plans alot, doesn't initiate conversation hardly ever, never seems to have much time for you, etc., just cut bait and run. She is definitely just holding on to you "just in case".

[Life lessons]

I forgot to mention this!

Yesterday evening (3am - about 9 hours after our convo) she sent me a link to a one bedroom apartment. And she responded with a text that said 'want to move in together and split the cost?'

 

Note: she's currently couch surfing and is looking for a new place because she has until the end of the month.

I currently live alone in a bachelor.

 

Wowsers!! That's too much, imo, considering you've not known each other that long!

 

Maybe she has no place to go and wants free rent?? Nah...I m kidding. I hope that's not the case but imo, she's "feeling" you out for a response....in regards to her mentioning the apartment. This just seems way to quick!

 

It's seems strange that she doesn't want to be exclusive but then sends you a link about living together. MAybe she's searching for a roommate..?

[Life lessons]

I recently went through a very similar situation so I would say proceed with caution. In my case, I was strung a long for 3+ months because she wasn't "ready" for a relationship. Being a "plan b" or a placeholder is not something I will ever be again.

 

If I were you, I'd be careful. If a women really wants to be with someone, it'll be extremely evident. If she cancels plans alot, doesn't initiate conversation hardly ever, never seems to have much time for you, etc., just cut bait and run. She is definitely just holding on to you "just in case".

 

I completely agree.

 

Women make time for someone if they're interested in them.

[Life lessons]

You said you live alone....has she asked to move in with you? Do you have 2 bedrooms? Maybe she really is looking for a roommate! Do you think?

 

Exited. I just saw she sent a link to a 1 bedroom. I don't know..your situation does seem a little strange to me, in regards to her.

Edited April 4, 2017 by Life lessons

[Crosswords]

I recently went through a very similar situation so I would say proceed with caution. In my case, I was strung a long for 3+ months because she wasn't "ready" for a relationship. Being a "plan b" or a placeholder is not something I will ever be again.

 

If I were you, I'd be careful. If a women really wants to be with someone, it'll be extremely evident. If she cancels plans alot, doesn't initiate conversation hardly ever, never seems to have much time for you, etc., just cut bait and run. She is definitely just holding on to you "just in case".

 

She always makes time for me. I don't feel strung along. Never canceled a plan, except on night when she felt quite sick all day. She does initiate conversation. I don't think I would stick around for 2 months and not yet be exclusive.

[Crosswords]

You said you live alone....has she asked to move in with you? Do you have 2 bedrooms? Maybe she really is looking for a roommate! Do you think?

 

Exited. I just saw she sent a link to a 1 bedroom. I don't know..your situation does seem a little strange to me, in regards to her.

 

No. She's never asked to move in with me. And said if I asked to help her she wouldn't want to be indebted to me like that. And plus, I don't think I would offer that scenario anyways.

[Crosswords]

Wowsers!! That's too much, imo, considering you've not known each other that long!

 

Maybe she has no place to go and wants free rent?? Nah...I m kidding. I hope that's not the case but imo, she's "feeling" you out for a response....in regards to her mentioning the apartment. This just seems way to quick!

 

It's seems strange that she doesn't want to be exclusive but then sends you a link about living together. MAybe she's searching for a roommate..?

 

What do you mean by feeling me out?

 

And she does make time for me. I don't think she's not interested. She wouldn't have had sex with me if she wasn't.

[marksaysay]

She wouldn't have had sex with me if she wasn't.

 

That's exactly what I thought. As a matter of fact, I'm kinda convinced now that all she wanted was the no-strings-attached sex.