Image and Style - Again

[serial muse]

Haha, so I went online to find some sample images of actors that I think pull off the casual style whenever they have shaved heads (they have all kinds of face shapes; I've seen everyone from Timothy Olyphant to Paul Bettany to Jake Gyllenhaal do this for movie roles)...and I found that for some reason whenever their heads are shaved they suddenly discover a predilection for muscle shirts, perhaps with a leather jacket. As soon as it grows back they're doing the Hollywood rotation between well-cut suits and regular old t-shirts again. It's kind of hilarious. I have discovered something here. There is something about shaving your head that makes you buy tighter T-shirts!

[pteromom]

This is a really good guide.

 

The Athletic/Muscular Man?s Style Guide | FashionBeans

[Heatherknows]

Good point.

 

Lavo, Marquee, Governors Beach Club, Pacha. All the same results.

 

The best one I've met so far was from Israel, met in a cheezy times square Irish Pub while killing some time.

 

Guess I need to wander more.

 

On topic though, how can I change from Vin Diesel to Paul Walker, given I currently look mostly like Vin Diesel and do not have Paul Walker facial features and can't grow my hair out from shaved?

 

I don't think you look like Vin Diesel in your picture. Do you look different than this picture you have posted?

[serial muse]

I was going to say that too. I understand the question, but honestly I don't think you look like Vin Diesel in the face, OP. Give it a try; I'd bet you could pull it off.

[loveweary11]

I agree with this. When you look like you are trying too hard, you come across as arrogant and self-obsessed, which is really unattractive.

 

Wear well-fitting, tailored, but not tight. clothing. Since you have $, you can even have t-shirts tailored to where they fit you well. Jeans, slacks, shorts, everything. This will give you that put-together "wealthy" look without going out and buying a bunch of designer stuff that attracts gold digger types. It will just make the most of your body without looking like you are trying too hard or going meathead.

 

Also, make sure you are choosing clothing you like. You want to attract girls who are like you or who understand you. Just like you said about Harley people being attracted to each other. Choose styles, colors, and brands that you connect with.

 

I literally have no clue how to do what you describe here in the preceding paragraph. Don't even know where to begin. A lot of tight H&M clothing is what I have, mixed with high end, cool jeans.

 

If it is just a matter of looking like Paul Walker, you can Google him, and copy his outfits. But that seems fakey, and probably won't work. Because you AREN'T Paul Walker. Or Vin Diesel. You are you.

 

Not trying to look like Paul Walker. That was the Asian girl's example of 2 people who were different to illustrate her point... and it's very clear looking ar those two.

 

Your face is fine.

 

How is your temperament/attitude? Do you come across as brutish, aggressive, angry, arrogant, stand-offish, bitter, or rude? Or are you approachable, friendly, humorous, happy, accepting, and open? The aura around you will attract or repel women as much as (or more than) what you look like.

 

I come across as friendly, fun, nice.

[loveweary11]

I don't think you look like Vin Diesel in your picture. Do you look different than this picture you have posted?

 

No... on the scale between the two guys (the Asian girl's example), I look way more like Vin Diesel than Paul Walker.

 

The two guys are far apart on a spectrum. I have a shaved head, some muscles and the same coloring as Vin Diesel.

 

Close enough to fall on his side of the dichotomy.

[jay1983]

That's what I'm thinking. Hes just a better looking guy, period, so they like him. But the clothing does matter.

 

I feel like an even better question would be:

Would Vin look good if he had Paul Walker's loose clothing on?

 

Yeah Paul Walker aside from having a different look is more conventionally attractive. The good thing about it is, women are weird. They develop a type/look and then they just stick that. It's usually something they get from their family or someone (maybe on TV) they were exposed to at a young age.

 

She's an Asian woman. Notice the white guys that asian women like are usually the pretty type with silky hair, not so much the rugged bearded type. Ashton Kutcher vs George Clooney.

[loveweary11]

Haha, so I went online to find some sample images of actors that I think pull off the casual style whenever they have shaved heads (they have all kinds of face shapes; I've seen everyone from Timothy Olyphant to Paul Bettany to Jake Gyllenhaal do this for movie roles)...and I found that for some reason whenever their heads are shaved they suddenly discover a predilection for muscle shirts, perhaps with a leather jacket. As soon as it grows back they're doing the Hollywood rotation between well-cut suits and regular old t-shirts again. It's kind of hilarious. I have discovered something here. There is something about shaving your head that makes you buy tighter T-shirts!

 

It's because that's all you have.

 

Shaved heads minimize your head, pulling focus to your body.

 

If there is nothing to look at there either, you are not noticed.

[pteromom]

I come across as friendly, fun, nice.

 

That is good! That's more than half the battle right there.

 

I didn't realize you shave your head.

 

That can be sexy, but you want to do something to "soften" yourself just a little.

 

Paul Walker, while being good looking, also seems very non-threatening.

 

With a shaved head, it is easy to come across as a little intimidating.

 

Try wearing softer colors, shirts with a little sense of humor (not just geeky tees, but maybe even Hawaiian-inspired or something), things that completely SEPARATE you from bikers, skinheads, meatheads, and Vin Diesel.

 

You can also go slightly in a more business-like direction. Not suits (although man, there is nothing sexier than a guy in a well-tailored suit!) but getting some nice jackets to wear with jeans and tees (again all tailored!), spending the $ for some quality shoes, and getting some sexy (tailored!) button downs to wear with jeans or casual pants.

 

Again, since you have $, you could even hire someone to help you find the right wardrobe for you. I bet they have tons of people who do that sort of thing in NYC.

[loveweary11]

That is good! That's more than half the battle right there.

 

I didn't realize you shave your head.

 

That can be sexy, but you want to do something to "soften" yourself just a little.

 

Paul Walker, while being good looking, also seems very non-threatening.

 

With a shaved head, it is easy to come across as a little intimidating.

 

Try wearing softer colors, shirts with a little sense of humor (not just geeky tees, but maybe even Hawaiian-inspired or something), things that completely SEPARATE you from bikers, skinheads, meatheads, and Vin Diesel.

 

You can also go slightly in a more business-like direction. Not suits (although man, there is nothing sexier than a guy in a well-tailored suit!) but getting some nice jackets to wear with jeans and tees (again all tailored!), spending the $ for some quality shoes, and getting some sexy (tailored!) button downs to wear with jeans or casual pants.

 

Again, since you have $, you could even hire someone to help you find the right wardrobe for you. I bet they have tons of people who do that sort of thing in NYC.

 

Ok, this is really good. Thank you.

 

Follow on question:

 

If I'm looking to attract the hippie/outdoors/open minded type, I can't wear suits or dressy things, nor can I bring myself to wear soft shirts (personally I can't). So I guess this is where I'm stuck.

 

I want to try to convey that Johnny Depp type complex, earthy image, but I have a shaved head.

 

Am I just screwed then? :(

 

I feel limited by my style.

[jay1983]

That is good! That's more than half the battle right there.

 

I didn't realize you shave your head.

 

That can be sexy, but you want to do something to "soften" yourself just a little.

 

Paul Walker, while being good looking, also seems very non-threatening.

 

With a shaved head, it is easy to come across as a little intimidating.

 

Try wearing softer colors, shirts with a little sense of humor (not just geeky tees, but maybe even Hawaiian-inspired or something), things that completely SEPARATE you from bikers, skinheads, meatheads, and Vin Diesel.

 

You can also go slightly in a more business-like direction. Not suits (although man, there is nothing sexier than a guy in a well-tailored suit!) but getting some nice jackets to wear with jeans and tees (again all tailored!), spending the $ for some quality shoes, and getting some sexy (tailored!) button downs to wear with jeans or casual pants.

 

Again, since you have $, you could even hire someone to help you find the right wardrobe for you. I bet they have tons of people who do that sort of thing in NYC.

 

LMAO

 

Maybe some Glasses ?

Edited August 13, 2015 by jay1983

[cerridwen]

LMAO

 

Maybe some Glasses ?

 

Hahahahahaha.....

[writergal]

Ok, this is really good. Thank you.

 

Follow on question:

 

If I'm looking to attract the hippie/outdoors/open minded type, I can't wear suits or dressy things, nor can I bring myself to wear soft shirts (personally I can't). So I guess this is where I'm stuck.

 

I want to try to convey that Johnny Depp type complex, earthy image, but I have a shaved head.

 

Am I just screwed then? :(

 

I feel limited by my style.

 

Wear clothes that look good on your body frame that don't make you look pretentious. That's the limit of the power you (or anyone has) over who you attract based on your fashion sense.

 

I know plenty of hippies/outdoor/open minded people who dress conservatively and who don't dress conservatively. They dress the way they feel comfortable and once you talk to them, you learn what their views, values, politics, interests, hobbies are.

 

Do not judge a book by its cover. If you are interested in reading what's on the pages, you have to actually open the book.

 

Depp dresses conservatively and casually too, so his fashion sense is very open. His sense of style is very fluid. He either wears his hair short or grows it long, has a clean shaven face or a bear or goatee. He's Depp, so he can wear anything and look good because of the confidence he exudes in who he is as a person. He doesn't seem to care what other people think of him.

[pteromom]

Ok, this is really good. Thank you.

 

Follow on question:

 

If I'm looking to attract the hippie/outdoors/open minded type, I can't wear suits or dressy things, nor can I bring myself to wear soft shirts (personally I can't). So I guess this is where I'm stuck.

 

I want to try to convey that Johnny Depp type complex, earthy image, but I have a shaved head.

 

Am I just screwed then? :(

 

I feel limited by my style.

 

Nope - not screwed. And you can totally wear dressy things. It's a matter of what you pair them with and how you wear them.

 

Johnny Depp has a very quirky unique style...it's not really hippie/earthy. His style is so out there, it may be hard to portray seriously, being a big muscular guy - you'd look like a parody.

 

What you want to do is choose one item in each outfit that conveys the vibe you want ... it's the t-shirt you wear with the jeans and jacket. Or the accessories - belts, jewelry, scarves, vests... it has to be subtle enough to not look like a costume, but just a nod to a hippie or earthy or outdoorsman style.

 

Again - I strongly recommend hiring a good personal shopper, who would know the brands that work best for your body, would work with a great tailor, and who could really put some awesome outfits together for you.

 

I get that it is easy to just do basics, but if you want to take your style to the next level, you have to think outside the box, and see what can work from you from ALL styles of clothing.

 

 

Sexy! The button down shirt doesn't look "dressy" here. The brown belt adds that "earthy" feel. I would trade the tight v-neck for something not QUITE that fitted/sexy, but it is a good look for your body type.

 

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/b2/ea/52/b2ea527ebb4c6b872fa97695bd7b540f.jpg

 

Take this outfit, trade the black belt for something brown and hippie-inspired, add a necklace that looks earthy, and add a good pair of hiking style shoes, and you have a look that is casual and sexy without trying hard. (Again - get the shirt tailored. Gonna keep saying it because it is really important.)

 

http://www.mensfitness.com/sites/mensfitness.com/files/styles/photo_gallery_full/public/135525684.jpg?itok=0lGDGyuh

 

A perfect example of a jacket looking super smooth and cool, and not at all dressy. The bracelet adds an extra level of casual. You could trade this tee in for one a little more earthy looking, and there you go.

 

http://i1.wp.com/ourmode.ca/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/mens-tshirt-blazer.jpg?resize=678%2C1024

 

A brown leather jacket looks earthy, goes with everything, and is softer than black (this is what I mean by softer, not baby blue or yellow.)

 

http://cf.ltkcdn.net/mens-fashion/images/std/148774-285x421-man-in-denim-and-leather.jpg

[jay1983]

Nope - not screwed. And you can totally wear dressy things. It's a matter of what you pair them with and how you wear them.

 

Johnny Depp has a very quirky unique style...it's not really hippie/earthy. His style is so out there, it may be hard to portray seriously, being a big muscular guy - you'd look like a parody.

 

What you want to do is choose one item in each outfit that conveys the vibe you want ... it's the t-shirt you wear with the jeans and jacket. Or the accessories - belts, jewelry, scarves, vests... it has to be subtle enough to not look like a costume, but just a nod to a hippie or earthy or outdoorsman style.

 

Again - I strongly recommend hiring a good personal shopper, who would know the brands that work best for your body, would work with a great tailor, and who could really put some awesome outfits together for you.

 

I get that it is easy to just do basics, but if you want to take your style to the next level, you have to think outside the box, and see what can work from you from ALL styles of clothing.

 

 

Sexy! The button down shirt doesn't look "dressy" here. The brown belt adds that "earthy" feel. I would trade the tight v-neck for something not QUITE that fitted/sexy, but it is a good look for your body type.

 

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/b2/ea/52/b2ea527ebb4c6b872fa97695bd7b540f.jpg

 

Take this outfit, trade the black belt for something brown and hippie-inspired, add a necklace that looks earthy, and add a good pair of hiking style shoes, and you have a look that is casual and sexy without trying hard. (Again - get the shirt tailored. Gonna keep saying it because it is really important.)

 

http://www.mensfitness.com/sites/mensfitness.com/files/styles/photo_gallery_full/public/135525684.jpg?itok=0lGDGyuh

 

A perfect example of a jacket looking super smooth and cool, and not at all dressy. The bracelet adds an extra level of casual. You could trade this tee in for one a little more earthy looking, and there you go.

 

http://i1.wp.com/ourmode.ca/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/mens-tshirt-blazer.jpg?resize=678%2C1024

 

A brown leather jacket looks earthy, goes with everything, and is softer than black (this is what I mean by softer, not baby blue or yellow.)

 

http://cf.ltkcdn.net/mens-fashion/images/std/148774-285x421-man-in-denim-and-leather.jpg

 

I see where you're getting at, but the funny thing is, you keep using these Paul Walker type looking guys.

 

Anyways, are the little details like the brown belt, brown jacket really that noticeable? If so do they make a lot of difference in a real life scenario?

Edited August 13, 2015 by jay1983

[pteromom]

I see where you're getting at, but the funny thing is, you keep using these Paul Walker type looking guys.

 

Anyways, are the little details like the brown belt, brown jacket really that noticeable? If so do they make a lot of difference in a real life scenario?

 

I didn't look at the guys - was looking at the style as it would fit with his body type and the vibe he wants to convey.

 

Yes, the details make all the difference in the vibe. You can make the exact same clothing look business, casual, or homeless, just by how you put them together.

[loveweary11]

Incredible advice.

 

Thank you sooo much!

 

I have seen the "one accessory" thing done, but never noticed it.

 

For the record, I'm not big. I'm medium build with a heavily worked out body.

 

Like if David Beckham lifted a few more weights.

 

I don't have the Vin Diesel body type.

 

But I'm going to try what you are describing here, continuing to wear fitted clothing, somehow, but bring the accessories in.

 

I mean right this second I'm in whole foods seated and eating. Black fitted tee, tight, but high end jeans, Supra sneakers.

 

Getting a LOT of attention. But, as i listen in, I hear they are all office women.

 

Maybe the accessories will attract the free spirit types.

 

And maybe I can combine a good fit and hippie clothing for my own look.

 

This could actually be fun!

 

 

 

 

Nope - not screwed. And you can totally wear dressy things. It's a matter of what you pair them with and how you wear them.

 

Johnny Depp has a very quirky unique style...it's not really hippie/earthy. His style is so out there, it may be hard to portray seriously, being a big muscular guy - you'd look like a parody.

 

What you want to do is choose one item in each outfit that conveys the vibe you want ... it's the t-shirt you wear with the jeans and jacket. Or the accessories - belts, jewelry, scarves, vests... it has to be subtle enough to not look like a costume, but just a nod to a hippie or earthy or outdoorsman style.

 

Again - I strongly recommend hiring a good personal shopper, who would know the brands that work best for your body, would work with a great tailor, and who could really put some awesome outfits together for you.

 

I get that it is easy to just do basics, but if you want to take your style to the next level, you have to think outside the box, and see what can work from you from ALL styles of clothing.

 

 

Sexy! The button down shirt doesn't look "dressy" here. The brown belt adds that "earthy" feel. I would trade the tight v-neck for something not QUITE that fitted/sexy, but it is a good look for your body type.

 

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/b2/ea/52/b2ea527ebb4c6b872fa97695bd7b540f.jpg

 

Take this outfit, trade the black belt for something brown and hippie-inspired, add a necklace that looks earthy, and add a good pair of hiking style shoes, and you have a look that is casual and sexy without trying hard. (Again - get the shirt tailored. Gonna keep saying it because it is really important.)

 

http://www.mensfitness.com/sites/mensfitness.com/files/styles/photo_gallery_full/public/135525684.jpg?itok=0lGDGyuh

 

A perfect example of a jacket looking super smooth and cool, and not at all dressy. The bracelet adds an extra level of casual. You could trade this tee in for one a little more earthy looking, and there you go.

 

http://i1.wp.com/ourmode.ca/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/mens-tshirt-blazer.jpg?resize=678%2C1024

 

A brown leather jacket looks earthy, goes with everything, and is softer than black (this is what I mean by softer, not baby blue or yellow.)

 

http://cf.ltkcdn.net/mens-fashion/images/std/148774-285x421-man-in-denim-and-leather.jpg

[Rejected Rosebud]

That's silly. NY is filled with artist types, activist types, etc. I don't know how much time you've spent in NY but it's filled with 30 something single attractive women with interesting lives. LOL.

Yes I find this head scratchingly confusing too. I spend alot of time in NYC, I am 24, my closest friends / cousin there are 1) in a band 2) work in publishing and 3) is a professional writer. And these close people have troves of other friends. Alot of these people have good bodies, though of course there are average, fat and muffin tops among them!! But nice body or not, not even ONE of them is into "hookup culture," hanging around in trashy clubs doing coke, agreeing to have their pictures taken in fake photo shoots, etc. This sounds more like what we called "bridge and tunnel people" if I'm being honest!! :lmao:

So OP to your original question it sounds like, from all your posts, you ARE representing yourself as one of these people that you don't appreciate going out with. If you would like to go out with people who care about other things you have to live that way too. I mean you really should not even BE in a bar where people are doing cocaine in the bathroom or whatever at your age that sounds like the scene I imagine back in the 1980's!

I have to say I think it's weird that you started this all off by talking about how you are "Asian ugly," and then wanted to talk about types of women liking what types of guys. Is "Asian" a type of woman to you? Cause I think an Asian girl can be a club rat, or a philanthropist or a hippy or a nerd or whatever just as well as any other race of girl!!:confused:

[Rejected Rosebud]

It's because that's all you have.

 

Shaved heads minimize your head, pulling focus to your body.

 

If your head looks minimized though wouldn't it look even smaller if you have a buffed up body?? That might look like an actual pinhead!

[jen1447]

Just to point it out, Paul Walker's dead. (Was killed in a horrible car crash/fire a year or two ago.) Just seems a little weird to use him as one of our example models given that fact.

[loveweary11]

One other detail...

 

Writergal:

 

I come across as so nice and not pretentious that I blend in.

 

I need boldness to counteract that.

[pteromom]

Getting a LOT of attention. But, as i listen in, I hear they are all office women.!

 

Sometimes, office women can be free spirit types. We all have to pay the bills. Don't stereotype people.

 

Actually, now that you realize the importance of accessories, you can look for the office women with turquoise necklaces, fringed bags, suede sandals, and braided bracelets, and find your people. Open up a whole new demographic.

 

[loveweary11]

Yes I find this head scratchingly confusing too. I spend alot of time in NYC, I am 24, my closest friends / cousin there are 1) in a band 2) work in publishing and 3) is a professional writer. And these close people have troves of other friends. Alot of these people have good bodies, though of course there are average, fat and muffin tops among them!! But nice body or not, not even ONE of them is into "hookup culture," hanging around in trashy clubs doing coke, agreeing to have their pictures taken in fake photo shoots, etc. This sounds more like what we called "bridge and tunnel people" if I'm being honest!! :lmao:

So OP to your original question it sounds like, from all your posts, you ARE representing yourself as one of these people that you don't appreciate going out with. If you would like to go out with people who care about other things you have to live that way too. I mean you really should not even BE in a bar where people are doing cocaine in the bathroom or whatever at your age that sounds like the scene I imagine back in the 1980's!

I have to say I think it's weird that you started this all off by talking about how you are "Asian ugly," and then wanted to talk about types of women liking what types of guys. Is "Asian" a type of woman to you? Cause I think an Asian girl can be a club rat, or a philanthropist or a hippy or a nerd or whatever just as well as any other race of girl!!:confused:

 

Odd attack.

 

My ASIAN FRIEND was going on about ASIAN STEREOTYPES when I said I thought I'm "Asian Ugly."

 

You obviously spent just enough time here to know what bridge and tunnel trash is (guess you're one of them? don't live here?)

 

However, you definitely don't understand the culture if you think anyone in NYC cares about racial crap. We're all different and all laugh at our differeces.

 

Take you racism diatribe elsewhere please.

 

This is a thread about fashion/image.

[pteromom]

Yes I find this head scratchingly confusing too. I spend alot of time in NYC, I am 24, my closest friends / cousin there are 1) in a band 2) work in publishing and 3) is a professional writer. And these close people have troves of other friends. Alot of these people have good bodies, though of course there are average, fat and muffin tops among them!! But nice body or not, not even ONE of them is into "hookup culture," hanging around in trashy clubs doing coke, agreeing to have their pictures taken in fake photo shoots, etc. This sounds more like what we called "bridge and tunnel people" if I'm being honest!! :lmao:

So OP to your original question it sounds like, from all your posts, you ARE representing yourself as one of these people that you don't appreciate going out with. If you would like to go out with people who care about other things you have to live that way too. I mean you really should not even BE in a bar where people are doing cocaine in the bathroom or whatever at your age that sounds like the scene I imagine back in the 1980's!

I have to say I think it's weird that you started this all off by talking about how you are "Asian ugly," and then wanted to talk about types of women liking what types of guys. Is "Asian" a type of woman to you? Cause I think an Asian girl can be a club rat, or a philanthropist or a hippy or a nerd or whatever just as well as any other race of girl!!:confused:

 

This is a really good post, and another very good point.

 

If you want to find smart, earthy, free-spirited, creative, passionate women, you have to hang out where they are, and those women aren't in the clubs. They are out changing the world, volunteering, going to school, hanging at art galleries and book stores and coffee shops.

 

Clubs are a waste of your time for the kind of woman you are looking for.

[Heatherknows]

Just to point it out, Paul Walker's dead. (Was killed in a horrible car crash/fire a year or two ago.) Just seems a little weird to use him as one of our example models given that fact.

 

I was thinking the same thing.