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This sucks.

BetrayedH

By BetrayedH,
in Infidelity

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merrmeade

merrmeade

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omg, yes, that's what absolutely drives me bonkers about this whole thing. I mean, I just don't see how they do it - spout beliefs and do the opposite not even owning up to the glaring dichotomy between word and action within themselves. I just don't see how people can mind-f--k themselves that way.

  • Even after d-day, my H had NO PROBLEM facing my brother. I marveled at it. I'm sure I could not have been in the same room with a quadriplegic whose spouse I'd been diddling and think instead about all the sacrifice I'd made for his family.
  • My all-time favorite mind-movie with stellar actors of the finest hypocritic traditions, featuring SIL in bed with my H (her H's sister's H), diddle, diddle, diddling away / her son, coming home past curfew / SIL, jumping out of bed, throwing on nightgown, racing to detour son and railing at him for moral turpitude.

 

I actually enjoy replaying this one to flush out any lurking allegiance to her as my brother's recent widow.

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dichotomy

dichotomy

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I like your post simply because of the reference to the good Doctor :)

 

Wouldn't you be better off thinking that the T.A.R.D.I.S could take you on happy adventures rather than take you back to a period of hurt and pain?

 

Not long after my ex cheated and I had my world blown up I remember thinking... now would be a really great time for that blue box to show up in my living room and take me AWAY from here... not take me back to my sorrow. Just food for thought... carry on.

 

Good idea...

 

It seems the doctor is always struggling with sorrow over "the past" while trying to enjoy the moment with his companion - he keeps trying to fix things in the past/future, to straighten out the whole time line by fixing one point where it all got messed up. Its usually someone else mistakes, sometimes his own.

 

New season this year...The Doctor has aged and is unsure of his nature ..I get that.

 

 

I think the pain of the past - of adultery - still reaches out and touches us all these years later. It does suck.

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Raena

Raena

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Good idea...

 

It seems the doctor is always struggling with sorrow over "the past" while trying to enjoy the moment with his companion - he keeps trying to fix things in the past/future, to straighten out the whole time line by fixing one point where it all got messed up. Its usually someone else mistakes, sometimes his own.

 

New season this year...The Doctor has aged and is unsure of his nature ..I get that.

 

 

I think the pain of the past - of adultery - still reaches out and touches us all these years later. It does suck.

 

Yes he does spend a great deal of time trying to right mistakes he's made. I spent a lot of time doing that myself... trying to figure out if I could go back in time when would be that one defining moment that I could have changed in order to keep myself from having to go through all the pain I went through. But every time I think about changing MY past I realize that I would also be changing someone else's future.. namely my son's but some other's as well.

 

I finally realized that even if I could figure out when that defining moment would have been and changed it, there's no guarantee that I wouldn't have had some other awful thing happen. It's best to focus on the future rather than bemoaning what I should have done.

 

It's not that easy... the future looks pretty bleak some times.

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ComingInHot

ComingInHot

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My .25*, it sucks when I people turn the Word inside out to fit their own grand game.

A little back on to the main, I have to admit and I won't digress but I am a titch envious of you here who have had the balls (can I say that?:confused:?) to get out, let go, move on and are in waaay BETTER relationships with amazing people even though 'it does suck' to still have to deal with the the ex flinging pooh once in a while.

I chose to stay. I could re-name all the reasons, excuses blah blah blah, but in the end I did what I thought I needed to feeling like I had no choice even though knowing I did. The infidelity pops up in my head momentarily almost every day and I still look at the person whose decisions have changed my very soul. None of us are the same but I do sport a little jealousy (in a very positive and good way :D) for those who have moved on to better.

CIH*

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BetrayedH

BetrayedH

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My .25*, it sucks when I people turn the Word inside out to fit their own grand game.

A little back on to the main, I have to admit and I won't digress but I am a titch envious of you here who have had the balls (can I say that?:confused:?) to get out, let go, move on and are in waaay BETTER relationships with amazing people even though 'it does suck' to still have to deal with the the ex flinging pooh once in a while.

I chose to stay. I could re-name all the reasons, excuses blah blah blah, but in the end I did what I thought I needed to feeling like I had no choice even though knowing I did. The infidelity pops up in my head momentarily almost every day and I still look at the person whose decisions have changed my very soul. None of us are the same but I do sport a little jealousy (in a very positive and good way :D) for those who have moved on to better.

CIH*

 

I hear you. Just keep in mind that sometimes the grass just looks greener over here.

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BetrayedH

BetrayedH

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Yeah, the two-faced christian part drives me nuts since I'm neither and the SIL/OW was - get this, just GET THIS - the ONLY genuine believer in our generation, who, my parents felt, would keep the christian message alive. F--king hypocritic b--tch. Just getting prepared since I have to be with her again this weekend for brother's service and I know she'll coo and cry and put her nasty arms around me. (Thanks for indulging.)

 

I have several one-liners in mind for you when she does that.

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Spark1111

Spark1111

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Yeah, the two-faced christian part drives me nuts since I'm neither and the SIL/OW was - get this, just GET THIS - the ONLY genuine believer in our generation, who, my parents felt, would keep the christian message alive. F--king hypocritic b--tch. Just getting prepared since I have to be with her again this weekend for brother's service and I know she'll coo and cry and put her nasty arms around me. (Thanks for indulging.)

 

The kindest, most spiritual, loving people I personally know rarely visit a church.

 

if they do, they do not speak of it so much. They do not speak nor brag of their acts of kindness to others.

 

They do not USE adhering to the tenets of their chosen beliefs to garner positive attention for themselves.

 

be very, very wary of those who do....another ego-filling gender is underway.

 

beware of wolves in sheeps' clothing.

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BetrayedH

BetrayedH

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Shoot! I'm ready. Please share!

 

Let's keep it simple.

 

When she goes in for the hug, say, "Get the f%ck off me, bitch." When she follows it up with an incredulous look or some dismissive comment, "Did you seriously think we'd be friends after you cheated on my brother by sleeping with my husband? What the hell planet are you from?" Make sure your voice carries well.

 

Then resist the temptation to punch her face in.

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BetrayedH

BetrayedH

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Ya, all you ex BH, including BH, are out having the sex of your lives..

 

bastards....;)

 

Now that sucks....:lmao:

 

Ok, point taken. ;)

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