Consolidated 'looks' discussion and society's standards of beauty for men vs women

[tigressA]

I just hate this 1-10 rating bullsh*t. Seems like you're reviewing a product instead of describing a person.

[Estate]

Do you really think i don't talk to women?. I talk to them every day.

 

Judging by your screenname, avatar and generally all these types of threads you are starting, then, yes, I'd be fairly certain your not.

[Necris]

Bad desperation, bad.

 

Actually, as long as you aren't consciously lowering your standards to think a girl is attractive, it's OK. I'm sure those girls have/had boyfriends who probably thought they are decent looking.

 

 

I wouldn't call it lowering standards but rather broadening horizons, I thought by being less focused on looks I'd improve my dating luck yet it doesn't actually help.

 

As for those girls having boyfriends yeah maybe, its possible. Though from the responses to that pic very few guys would probably think they are attractive.

[Necris]

I just hate this 1-10 rating bullsh*t. Seems like you're reviewing a product instead of describing a person.

 

The 1 - 10 scale is subjective but its supposed to be a neat way of judging the attractiveness of a person to your eyes by assigning a numerical value to what you perceive as their attractiveness level.

 

Even without the exact 1-10 stuff you still consciously and subconsciously measure the attractiveness of people so I don't think its problematic.

[xxoo]

As for those girls having boyfriends yeah maybe, its possible. Though from the responses to that pic very few guys would probably think they are attractive.

 

It's a picture, and a bad one at that. In person, they may have many attractive qualities.

 

The 1 - 10 scale is subjective but its supposed to be a neat way of judging the attractiveness of a person to your eyes by assigning a numerical value to what you perceive as their attractiveness level.

 

Even without the exact 1-10 stuff you still consciously and subconsciously measure the attractiveness of people so I don't think its problematic.

 

Not really.

 

Beyond whether or not an individual is attractive to me, I have little interest in placing their attractiveness relative to other people. I simply don't do that in my normal life.

 

Even when someone is the most attractive to me, I am aware that they are not the most physically attractive, objectively, overall....but it doesn't matter because they are the most attractive to me. It isn't all about visual beauty when it comes to the person I want to touch, smell, and have sex with the most.

[Eternal Sunshine]

My boss is realistically a 5, maybe 5.5 - but I was more attracted to him than any man I have ever met. Too bad he didn't feel the same

[man_in_the_box]

For the men: Don't move to the Netherlands. Everybody is ****ing tall here, with the average for men at or slightly above six feet. Then again I still got gf at 5'11 and yes two of her exes were significantly taller than me. One was somewhat about 6'3 and the other was even taller. I suppose it's a important aspect but not the final answer in the pairing up process. It might be true that it's somewhat harder to get started for men but I think in the long run both genders have equal oppertunity to get into a relationship.

[BetheButterfly]

I just hate this 1-10 rating bullsh*t. Seems like you're reviewing a product instead of describing a person.

 

100% agree

 

Thankfully, my husband doesn't see me as a product rated by some weird # system based on the beauty of my shell. He sees me as a wonderful female human being who he loves and who loves him. That's what matters. Now, he does want me to take care of my shell... not put too much fat on it which I understand, but he doesn't rate me and I don't rate him. We see each other as human beings worthy of love and respect, who just happen to attract each other. The rest is chemistry.

 

Looks will fade, but what helps a couple to truly love each other is not the shell (the outside) but rather the mind protected by the shell.

[somedude81]

Rating 1-10 is an easy way to categorize somebody's looks. It's basically just using numbers instead of the terms, cute, pretty, hot, beautiful, gorgeous etc. If you get upset when you hear a man call a woman a seven, then you should get upset when you hear a man call a woman pretty.

[BetheButterfly]

Rating 1-10 is an easy way to categorize somebody's looks. It's basically just using numbers instead of the terms, cute, pretty, hot, beautiful, gorgeous etc. If you get upset when you hear a man call a woman a seven, then you should get upset when you hear a man call a woman pretty.

 

I have an idea. Go up to a woman who you consider is pretty, and tell her "You're a 7!" See how she responds. Go up to another woman who you think is pretty and tell her she's pretty. Please report the results. Thank you.

[KungFuJoe]

I guess there's nothing wrong with rating.

 

Just know that everyone's rating scale is different.

[BetheButterfly]

I guess there's nothing wrong with rating.

 

Just know that everyone's rating scale is different.

 

Do you rate your wife's appearance with a #?

 

If yes, why? If nope, why?

[somedude81]

I have an idea. Go up to a woman who you consider is pretty, and tell her "You're a 7!" See how she responds. Go up to another woman who you think is pretty and tell her she's pretty. Please report the results. Thank you.

Technically, they are the same exact thing.

 

Don't be surprised that one day calling somebody a 7 would be considered a compliment.

[BetheButterfly]

Technically, they are the same exact thing.

 

Don't be surprised that one day calling somebody a 7 would be considered a compliment.

 

Does this mean that calling somebody a 7 is not considered a compliment nowadays? Being called pretty is however considered a compliment.

[KungFuJoe]

Do you rate your wife's appearance with a #?

 

If yes, why? If nope, why?

 

My wife is a 10.

 

Throw in her personality and she's off the charts.

[somedude81]

Does this mean that calling somebody a 7 is not considered a compliment nowadays? Being called pretty is however considered a compliment.

I think it is. But it's not a commonly accepted compliment, yet.

[BetheButterfly]

My wife is a 10.

 

Throw in her personality and she's off the charts.

 

I think this is what any wise man would say about his wife lol, if required to rate her physical appearance.

 

Now, would you honestly rate her that if objectively comparing her to Megan Fox and the "world's most beautiful people?" Would other people rate her a 10 too?

 

30 years from now, would you continue to rate her as a 10, even if she gets wrinkles, hasn't gotten any plastic surgery done, and has put on a little weight?

 

Are you being objective in rating your wife a 10? I actually think your rating her is very subjective but I don't think that's bad. I wish that every husband would think that his wife is the most beautiful woman in the world, even when she is old.

 

However, sad to say, when people start rating and placing supreme importance on the beauty of the body, they start taking off points when the body shows signs of age and when blemishes appear, instead of seeing that the beauty of a person is not just based on his/her shell, but rather on the beauty of that person's mind and connection with others. That cannot be rated by numbers.

[KungFuJoe]

I think this is what any wise man would say about his wife lol, if required to rate her physical appearance.

 

Now, would you honestly rate her that if objectively comparing her to Megan Fox and the "world's most beautiful people?" Would other people rate her a 10 too?

 

30 years from now, would you continue to rate her as a 10, even if she gets wrinkles, hasn't gotten any plastic surgery done, and has put on a little weight?

 

Are you being objective in rating your wife a 10? I actually think your rating her is very subjective but I don't think that's bad. I wish that every husband would think that his wife is the most beautiful woman in the world, even when she is old.

 

However, sad to say, when people start rating and placing supreme importance on the beauty of the body, they start taking off points when the body shows signs of age and when blemishes appear, instead of seeing that the beauty of a person is not just based on his/her shell, but rather on the beauty of that person's mind and connection with others. That cannot be rated by numbers.

 

To ME, my wife is a 10. And this has nothing to do with love or affection. I was absolutely SMITTEN when I first laid eyes on her back when I was a senior and she was a soph in high school. I have never EVER had such an INSTANT and ridiculous crush on someone as I did with her. I thought she was, by far, the cutest girl in school. She was part of the "popular" crowd and I thought she was way out of my league. Luckily, I was wrong.

 

If someone had asked me what my type was, in terms of physical, I would list out features that she has.

 

Latina but light skinned

Big beautiful brown eyes with long eyelashes

Full lips with a beautiful smile

Beautiful curly hair (though she straightens it from time to time she has THE MOST beautiful curls ever)

Fit body...curves but with a petite frame

Beautiful legs with skinny ankles (I can wrap my hand around her ankle and my fingers can touch)

And the cutest feet and toes I've ever seen on a woman (I have a foot fetish so this is pretty big for me).

 

Now, I know other men might prefer a blonde, or an asian, or someone with HUGE boobs (my wife is a B/C cup) or taller (my wife is 5'4") and they might not rate her a 10...but I truly TRULY doubt that any one would look at her and think "meh". Hell no.

 

But you can judge for yourself. Here's two pics, taken nearly 10 years apart (first one when she was 27, second when she was 36...literally a couple months ago).

 

http://imageshack.us/a/img829/1949/pic1ya.jpg

 

http://imageshack.us/a/img405/5887/pic2nl.jpg

 

And Megan Fox looks like an alien.

[serial muse]

Technically, they are the same exact thing.

 

Don't be surprised that one day calling somebody a 7 would be considered a compliment.

 

Well, I would be shocked as hell. Never gonna happen.

 

Pretty = inherently subjective (one wants to be pretty to the object of one's affection) and yet unequivocally positive.

 

7 = clear implication that one is several points shy of ideal, even if several points above average. It's cold.

 

These two things aren't the same at all, never will be. I mean, really.

[somedude81]

Well, I would be shocked as hell. Never gonna happen.

 

Pretty = inherently subjective (one wants to be pretty to the object of one's affection) and yet unequivocally positive.

 

7 = clear implication that one is several points shy of ideal, even if several points above average. It's cold.

 

These two things aren't the same at all, never will be. I mean, really.

While true, that's just because girls don't get upset when a guy calls them pretty and respond with, "I'm just pretty? You don't think I'm gorgeous?! You jerk!"

[serial muse]

While true, that's just because girls don't get upset when a guy calls them pretty and respond with, "I'm just pretty? You don't think I'm gorgeous?! You jerk!"

 

I'm not sure I understood this - I mean, I agree, girls don't get upset at this, at least in my experience. I don't know anyone who gets upset when a guy calls her pretty...?

[Necris]

100% agree

 

Thankfully, my husband doesn't see me as a product rated by some weird # system based on the beauty of my shell. He sees me as a wonderful female human being who he loves and who loves him. That's what matters. Now, he does want me to take care of my shell... not put too much fat on it which I understand, but he doesn't rate me and I don't rate him. We see each other as human beings worthy of love and respect, who just happen to attract each other. The rest is chemistry.

 

Looks will fade, but what helps a couple to truly love each other is not the shell (the outside) but rather the mind protected by the shell.

 

I still see no problem with the attractiveness scale it seems irrational to get mad at a scale that uses numbers instead of just simply gorgeous,pretty, average, ugly, and hideous.

 

Besides when you first meet someone the first thing you see is their body and that's what you have to go by, perhaps you may see something else later that may increase or reduce attraction towards that person, but the body is usually always the first thing you see.

 

Also I never could understand this whole "chemistry" concept, what is it?

[xxoo]

While true, that's just because girls don't get upset when a guy calls them pretty and respond with, "I'm just pretty? You don't think I'm gorgeous?! You jerk!"

 

That's because "pretty" doesn't exclude "gorgeous"....or hot or cute or beautiful. An individual can be many of these things at once.

[BetheButterfly]

To ME, my wife is a 10. And this has nothing to do with love or affection. I was absolutely SMITTEN when I first laid eyes on her back when I was a senior and she was a soph in high school. I have never EVER had such an INSTANT and ridiculous crush on someone as I did with her. I thought she was, by far, the cutest girl in school. She was part of the "popular" crowd and I thought she was way out of my league. Luckily, I was wrong.

 

If someone had asked me what my type was, in terms of physical, I would list out features that she has.

 

Latina but light skinned

Big beautiful brown eyes with long eyelashes

Full lips with a beautiful smile

Beautiful curly hair (though she straightens it from time to time she has THE MOST beautiful curls ever)

Fit body...curves but with a petite frame

Beautiful legs with skinny ankles (I can wrap my hand around her ankle and my fingers can touch)

And the cutest feet and toes I've ever seen on a woman (I have a foot fetish so this is pretty big for me).

 

Now, I know other men might prefer a blonde, or an asian, or someone with HUGE boobs (my wife is a B/C cup) or taller (my wife is 5'4") and they might not rate her a 10...but I truly TRULY doubt that any one would look at her and think "meh". Hell no.

 

But you can judge for yourself. Here's two pics, taken nearly 10 years apart (first one when she was 27, second when she was 36...literally a couple months ago).

 

http://imageshack.us/a/img829/1949/pic1ya.jpg

 

http://imageshack.us/a/img405/5887/pic2nl.jpg

 

And Megan Fox looks like an alien.

 

Your wife is absolutely beautiful. I don't think the number 10 does her justice. Megan Fox is also absolutely beautiful.

 

However, what makes your wife so special to you is not her looks right? Would you still love her if she lost her looks?

[KungFuJoe]

Your wife is absolutely beautiful. I don't think the number 10 does her justice. Megan Fox is also absolutely beautiful.

 

However, what makes your wife so special to you is not her looks right? Would you still love her if she lost her looks?

 

I've never been a fan of Megan Fox. Her face looks so "fake". Like she's had work done. She was on an episode of Two And A Half Man (first season) and yeah, her body is ridiculous...but she just looks...plastic. I'm more into "natural" beauty, if that makes any sense.

 

What makes my wife special is a sum of her parts. It's like this:

 

Her looks attracted me initially.

Her personality attracts me permanently.

 

If she lost her looks, either naturally, or some freak accident, I would love her the same and would be by her side no matter what. Because I know what kind of person she is and because I love her and wouldn't want to spend my days and nights with anyone else.