vsmini Posted June 7, 2011 Share Posted June 7, 2011 "I once told my (now) ex-gf this: "You know that my heart is open to you, treat it with care because you have the power to either make me the happiest man alive, or destroy me"... and despite knowing that she did latter. Some people are just weak, and frankly never will know how to love." If a guy said that to me I would assume he was the weak one. I'm sure that person really appreciated being held responsible for your entire world and emotional well-being. That's WAY too much to put on one person. Link to post Share on other sites
Author John Davis Posted June 7, 2011 Author Share Posted June 7, 2011 "I once told my (now) ex-gf this: "You know that my heart is open to you, treat it with care because you have the power to either make me the happiest man alive, or destroy me"... and despite knowing that she did latter. Some people are just weak, and frankly never will know how to love." If a guy said that to me I would assume he was the weak one. I'm sure that person really appreciated being held responsible for your entire world and emotional well-being. That's WAY too much to put on one person. We started off too close and I too soft and forgiving. She liked having that emotional drivel articulated to her, even though I didn't really mean it deep down. Unhealthy relationship through and through. Anyway, I have no place for a cheap ho in my life - excuse my language. All the best;) J Link to post Share on other sites
sinnister Posted June 7, 2011 Share Posted June 7, 2011 (edited) We started off too close and I too soft and forgiving. She liked having that emotional drivel articulated to her, even though I didn't really mean it deep down. Unhealthy relationship through and through. Anyway, I have no place for a cheap ho in my life - excuse my language. All the best;) J I am sorry about that man...seriously. Your head seems to be at a good place to start healing...you know you put your all into it..despite what others say. I know mushy relationships...I just mean what I say to the SO. This will prob be my last post pretty much b/c people here are too quick w/the negative s--t not reading first or actually having a drop of empathy...just brings the whole climate down imo..but I would like to use your example as the NUMBER ONE reason that when you SO starts to get cold and distant ASK IF THERE'S ANOTHER PERSON INVOLVED. Don't whine and pout first...don't poll your neighbors, co-workers, friends, parents, and then strangers first...ASK THEM!! You don't want to just sit in limbo waiting for the inevitable anyway. Just get that part over with so you can work from a place of security. Just letting yourself burn playing the NC game is just pretty f--king stupid. ASK! And it's stupid b/c going NC should bring about closure and acceptance if you're breaking up and moving on..or making them miss you if you're going for reconciliation (that 85 percent of people are using it for being the dumpees). If the SO has another person in their life when you're going NC...and you never know and wait...that person will just put their emotional burn-off into the other person..who is there to either start a new r/s or to get laid..and can say and do anything at this point to be the perfect distraction. Don't assume they'll miss you...or think about you if they have someone else. You need to find out this BEFORE you go NC. You can ask after no more than a 3 day cooling down period b/c you will have to approach this topic as calm as possible. You want to leave on the high ground, plus it gives you a chance to not just appear jealous. This is not to imply at all that the pulling away in/out of the r/s is inevitably cheating..but it is in far more cases than not..could be just the r/s is in a rut, the SO needs space, or either one of you are going through a stressful period. Still, this is info you HAVE TO KNOW..don't let someone just walk out and back into your life smelling like roses when they don't deserve to. Be brave enough to know everything..because if you don't find out...you're just setting yourself up to be walked over when/if they come back. They'll have the same temptations, play the same games and make it about you..it isn't. Yeah..to put all of those emotions, patience, empathy, and understanding into someone that walks over it and betrays you anyway is the worst feeling and waste of time on earth. It's so easy to cheat...but it's not called cheating just for the sex...it's that you tell the other person that they are worth less than nothing to you. I want to leave the person I'm with either at the same place or better than how I found them...cheating is the coward's way out...it's saying they're either confused or want to be gone...but not giving you any chance to prepare like you should..so the emotional tethers are still there....they pull away...you're still attached and pulled with them and another person or the SO cuts the cord and you fall on your face...sometimes falling backwards if you stand your ground...but it always hurts...bad. Peace out. Edited June 7, 2011 by sinnister Link to post Share on other sites
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