Raderick Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 (edited) Me and a friend (female, who is Asian that I have zero attraction to) talked about this for a couple hours. She said she would have a really hard time dating someone who also isn't Japanese and I said that I would have a hard time dating someone who isn't Caucasian. This sparked a bit of a debate between us. I said that what we are doing is racism because we're immediately denying someone simply based on the color of their skin. She didn't think so because in her culture it's appropriate to date within your culture. I argued that attraction is key, and if someone doesn't have the attraction to a person who is, say, black, then so be it, but that doesn't stop it from being racism against people with black skin. We were cool and level-headed about it, and really nothing serious was thrown at each other. Thoughts? Edited August 24, 2010 by Raderick
Labster12 Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 No not at all, that is like saying you are sexist because you are using gender as a basis for judging others on dating. Dating is personal business afterall, I don't hate Blondes or Redheads but I wouldn't date one because I am not attracted to it. I don't eat Alligator meat, does that mean I want alligator meat to go extinct and be exterminated or something like that? No it just means I don't eat it. Thing is some societies are so politically correct that not wanting to engage in an interracial relationship will make you a racist. You cannot attack the personal preference of others because then it gets controversial, I know plenty of White girls who preach this open minded BS and when you ask if they would date an Asian guy they say no because Asian men are small down there. So at the end of the day, it is a freedom to have preferences and some prefer to date and marry within their own culture because it is easier. Marriage is tough already and not everyone can overcome the obstacle of interracial dating and marriage and the cultural differences that come with it.
somedude81 Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 No it's not racist. Nobody can be forced to like something they are not attracted to.
Chrome Barracuda Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 It's 50/50. It also depends on your culture and your social circle and where u live. I'm black didn't find white women attractive when I was young. Now I do. Because as I Got older I realized a man is a man, and a woman, is a woman. No matter what, once you start seeing a person beyond their skin color your perception Will change.
kalikula Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 I don't think it's racism, just personal preference. Just who you're attracted to. If you're born and raised in an environment with lots of people who are some race different than you, then you will probably be attracted to them.
MrNate Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 Why do black people always have to come up in racism examples? Jeez. But to answer the question, I don't think it's racism to prefer someone of your race when it comes to dating, etc. However, I believe that mindset is severely limiting. I just can't see myself refusing an awesome woman because, even though everything about her is on point, her skin is a different color. But to each, his own.
Cracker Jack Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 (edited) No. Not at all. I'm attracted to all types of women, tho, so. Edited August 24, 2010 by Cracker Jack
somedude81 Posted August 24, 2010 Posted August 24, 2010 I just can't see myself refusing an awesome woman because, even though everything about her is on point, her skin is a different color. Good point. What's more important to me than her skin color is her culture, values, & beliefs and those of her family. If they don't mesh with mine, then her race doesn't matter at all.
jamesum Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 I think white women are the hottest, but I cant see myself marrying one because when I look at them I dont see familiarity so it is simply hard for me to create that emotional bonding.
MrNate Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 I think white women are the hottest, but I cant see myself marrying one because when I look at them I dont see familiarity so it is simply hard for me to create that emotional bonding. White has absolutely nothing on Brazilian. lol.
alphamale Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 Thoughts? attraction has a different set of rules
David. Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 I said that what we are doing is racism Am inclined to agree with you. But first, what race are albino people? Once everybody figures that one out, come back to the question and ask whether it's race you're thinking of, or some other thing. If it is race, then yep, it's racist! If it's not race that's at issue, then it might be some other thing like xenophobia. Which is what I think your Asian friend shows signs of.
ViciousViolet Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 No it is not racism, it is human nature. We are naturally attracted to the familiar. I don't feel bad because I'm African-American and some guys aren't attracted to me because of that. We all have preferences. Personally I can't think of a race of men I wouldn't date. I love them all yet most of my friends will not go outside of their race.
WintersNightTraveler Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 This is a pretty obvious one. No. Now what about if you will f**k another race but not marry them? Now that is an interesting thread.
ViciousViolet Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 This is a pretty obvious one. No. Now what about if you will f**k another race but not marry them? Now that is an interesting thread. Really? People do it all of the time and I see no problem with it as long as you're honest and not taking them for a ride. I personally avoid those guys who just want to experiment but more power to them if they want to screw the rainbow before settling down. If I were a guy, I'd probably do the same thing.
Labster12 Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 This is a pretty obvious one. No. Now what about if you will f**k another race but not marry them? Now that is an interesting thread. I am sure the Spanish conquistadors and the Slave owners who raped Black women were a little racist.
WintersNightTraveler Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 Well one "harmless screwing around" response and one "continent rapist" response. I knew I had gold when I thought of this twist. I think it's a strange racism that is difficult to really object to convincingly. There's just something intuitively (to me) objectionable about it. But then I think, "why is it more racist to screw them than to not date them at all?" and I'm a little stumped. Maybe I've got it all wrong. Can one be racist and not the other? Or do they really have to either both be racist, or both be ok, for any reasonable definition of racism. Racism is subtle.
Penny91 Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 Now I will really get dirty. I would not marry someone of another race but I also would not marry a deaf or blind person. I also would not marry a person confined to a wheel chair. It is not that I am too good, it is just that I do not have a personality to cope with the social pressure. I have not revealed my race here.
D-Lish Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 attraction has a different set of rules Exactly Aplpha- attraction isn't something you rationalize, it's something you feel.
taiko Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 But then I think, "why is it more racist to screw them than to not date them at all?" and I'm a little stumped. Maybe I've got it all wrong. Can one be racist and not the other? Or do they really have to either both be racist, or both be ok, for any reasonable definition of racism. Racism is subtle. Because we presuppose that you didn't tell the sex partner that it is booty call with no ultimate future only because the sex partner's race will not make them a proper spouse. It could be seen as rape by fraud. Racism is subtle because "race" itself is political and social there are no absolutes.
WintersNightTraveler Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 Now I will really get dirty. I would not marry someone of another race but I also would not marry a deaf or blind person. I also would not marry a person confined to a wheel chair. It is not that I am too good, it is just that I do not have a personality to cope with the social pressure. I have not revealed my race here. Yeah that's pretty interesting too. I think the race thing is more twisted but I see what you are saying. Neither would dissuade me. I would probably object much more vehemently to the race issue. But when I think about it I don't feel like I have much consistency at all on this matter.
WintersNightTraveler Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 Because we presuppose that you didn't tell the sex partner that it is booty call with no ultimate future only because the sex partner's race will not make them a proper spouse. No I don't presuppose that. All I said is that you'd screw but not marry. Maybe you say right up front, "hey baby, I'm here to f*ck your [insert racial ephithet here] ass." Maybe she/he digs it. It could be seen as rape by fraud. Not reasonably. Don't water down the word rape. Racism is subtle because "race" itself is political and social there are no absolutes. Yes. But that's very general. So let's dig in.
sagetalk Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 White has absolutely nothing on Brazilian. lol. Last I checked Brazil had tons of white people (53% of population). People from Spain are as white as any other group of white people. Many of the original Scotsmen were from Spain and they are the whitest of the white.
D-Lish Posted August 25, 2010 Posted August 25, 2010 Because we presuppose that you didn't tell the sex partner that it is booty call with no ultimate future only because the sex partner's race will not make them a proper spouse. It could be seen as rape by fraud. Racism is subtle because "race" itself is political and social there are no absolutes. How can it be seens as rape by fraud if both parties are willing to have sex? We all take responsibilities for our own actions. Buyer beware.
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