Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 I told him after he suggested I cheat that he is never to mention my wife, me cheating on her or anything pertaining to our relationship again. I did apologize to my wife for initially being so stubborn about this. In my first marriage my ex tried to cut me off from all my friends from New York that date back to childhood because they were not as dignified as she would like so I sort of had flashbacks about that and I overreacted. Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 Yeah I can understand that one Wogs! I do it too. When my b/f would do something like my ex I would take it all out of proportion and refuse to let it go as that is what I did before and look where it got me! The things is, your wife is not your ex! Your wife is lovely and sweet and kind and that is why you love her! I understand your need to do your own thing and your need to not be told what to do and how to change - But dont become so set in your ways and so detemined not to change for another that you become pig headed and stubborn. Wether you like it or not, marriage is about compromise, and even though it has taken you a bit longer than it should have, that is what you have done! ::Applause:: I am glad you saw what your neighbour (not friend) has been trying to do! Link to post Share on other sites
sally4sara Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 Just wait till he starts hitting on your wife to get her to show her "true face" to you. Then the fun really begins. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 If he does that I might have to teach him a lesson. Any man that gets involved or tries to get involved with another man's woman deserves it. Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 If he does that I might have to teach him a lesson. Any man that gets involved or tries to get involved with another man's woman deserves it. Hate to point this out but he has already got involved! There is only one place for bad rubbish, no matter how messed in the head he is! Throw him away! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 Hate to point this out but he has already got involved! There is only one place for bad rubbish, no matter how messed in the head he is! Throw him away! I know for a fact that he is not involved with my wife and she is not involved with any other man. She shares my view that cheaters are scum. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 Okay now I am starting to understand where my wife is coming from. good for you Woggle.. See.. your wife does understand your friendship.. She knows it is harmful to your marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 I know for a fact that he is not involved with my wife and she is not involved with any other man. She shares my view that cheaters are scum. Ohhhhhhhh I did not mean phyically hon, I meant he has got involved in your marriage the day he tried to lure you away! He has no respect for your wife or he would not have done that. No matter how much he hates women he has no place in hating your wife! Link to post Share on other sites
sally4sara Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 I know for a fact that he is not involved with my wife and she is not involved with any other man. She shares my view that cheaters are scum. They never will be and I wasn't implying that. He might TRY to prove her fallible to show you the light. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 If he does try I hope she gives him a nice kick in the balls. Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 They never will be and I wasn't implying that. He might TRY to prove her fallible to show you the light. That is what he is doing now but he has even gone to the lengths of trying to lure him him into cheating He is bad news! Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 If he does try I hope she gives him a nice kick in the balls. Woggle he is just a neighbour, surely you do not need friends that bad that you encourage his bad attitude towards your lovely wife ?????? Grow a backbone (I know you have one) and kick him to the kerb! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 I thought he was my friend but it seems not. My wife doesn't even mind me hanging out with my old friends from New York and some of them are not the nice law abiding type but they never try to convince me to cheat. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 I hang out with him nearly every other night. He lives across the street and my wife can't understand why I would be buddy buddy with a guy that is trying to destroy my marriage. Yeah, I'd take some special someone to understand something like that. A true test of loyalty and tolerance. Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 Yeah, I'd take some special someone to understand something like that. A true test of loyalty and tolerance. Hold onto her Wogs she is all of the above, you are a lucky man Cherish her! and most of all stand up for her! Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 I'm glad that you have seen that your friend is in a bad place, and atleast right now he isn't the kind of friend that can give to you or bring alot of good into your life. Hopefully he'll get some counselling to help him not be so bitter and angry and when he is back to normal you two can hang out more. BUT, until then, you shouldn't be hanging out with him every other night, I mean, where was your wife all those nights you were with him? At home? Or was she out with friends or working? Your wife is a wonderful woman and you are blessed to have her. PS your friend owes you and your wife a huge appology. Maybe one day when he is out of his nasty funk, he'll understand what he's done wrong and why you've had to back off of him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 I guess another thing is that part of me is afraid that my friend mght be right and she will eventually leave me. You have the walkaway wife epidemic today and most men never see it coming. If it happens to me I will feel really stupid for trusting yet another woman that turned on me. People may think I am wrong for feeling this way but I can't ignore what I see happening around me. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 I guess another thing is that part of me is afraid that my friend mght be right and she will eventually leave me. You have the walkaway wife epidemic today and most men never see it coming. If it happens to me I will feel really stupid for trusting yet another woman that turned on me. People may think I am wrong for feeling this way but I can't ignore what I see happening around me. Unless you are in that M you cannot say what really happened. His side. Her side. and then of course there is the truth. Now would a guy that is trying to break up your marriage really be that great of a guy to be married to? That seems like a major sign of a character flaw. Perhaps he also did such underhanded things to his wife. He certainly does not have any respect for your wife...... just sayin'. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 It is not just him. I get scared for my marriage just looking at some of the threads on the divorce forum here. The problem is that I really do love her and if she does turn on me I might just be that guy listening to sad songs all depressed and I am utterly terrified of that happening. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 It is not just him. I get scared for my marriage just looking at some of the threads on the divorce forum here. The problem is that I really do love her and if she does turn on me I might just be that guy listening to sad songs all depressed and I am utterly terrified of that happening. Yeah, You would. Sht happens and all the rest. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 It is not just him. I get scared for my marriage just looking at some of the threads on the divorce forum here. The problem is that I really do love her and if she does turn on me I might just be that guy listening to sad songs all depressed and I am utterly terrified of that happening. Perhaps what you shoud fear instead is if something were to happen to her........ not what she will do to you. Woggle, lets get real. If she did leave you it might hurt, but you will go on. People lose their partners to death and find a way to survive. Is it the fear of being left alone or the fear of her actually leaving you? You went against all that you thought was true and married her.... boy that would suck if YOU were wrong making that decision. control. control. control...... win, must not lose................. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 Perhaps what you shoud fear instead is if something were to happen to her........ not what she will do to you. Woggle, lets get real. If she did leave you it might hurt, but you will go on. People lose their partners to death and find a way to survive. Is it the fear of being left alone or the fear of her actually leaving you? You went against all that you thought was true and married her.... boy that would suck if YOU were wrong making that decision. control. control. control...... win, must not lose................. It is the fear of finding a woman that I genuinely love feel is trustworthy and her turning out to be like every other woman in my life that has betrayed me. For the forst time in my life I feel like I have a woman that I can truly trust and sometimes I find myself looking for guy saying Smile you are on candid camera. After all the other experiences I have had with women and all that I observe from women this doesn't seem real to me. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 It is the fear of finding a woman that I genuinely love feel is trustworthy and her turning out to be like every other woman in my life that has betrayed me. For the forst time in my life I feel like I have a woman that I can truly trust and sometimes I find myself looking for guy saying Smile you are on candid camera. After all the other experiences I have had with women and all that I observe from women this doesn't seem real to me. If it isn't -------- you will still survive. IMHO it is all a gamble. What if I invest in a business that I really thought couldn't make it. Likely it wouldn't because that is my preconcieved notion. Do the best you can ..... work at it. If it fails find a new business to start. Divorce is not the end of the world. Far from it. Take what you learn, move on. Running about waiting for the sky to fall is not living! and dude look at it this way I am a man hater that has hung in with a dead horse for over a year........ :lmao: Things are not always what they appear to be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 All you can do is be the best you can be. A wife never leaves a husband for no reason whatsoever and you worrying about it will not change the outcome. If she decides to leave you then you will survive but until that day surely you owe her the curtesy of being 100% committed! She sounds great hon - Hey I am a darstardly woman and I have never cheated! We do exist you know! Dump the chump and give your time to the woman who loves you alot by the sounds of it! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Woggle Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 Yeah she loves me now but what if she turns at the drop of hat one day and I am left wondering WTF just happened. Women do tend to do that. Link to post Share on other sites
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