bigheartkindsoul Posted October 31, 2007 Posted October 31, 2007 me probably the worst. I am really sorry.
plainoldjared Posted October 31, 2007 Posted October 31, 2007 Funny on my old forum I was member of, I asked alot about moving to Florida and alot of peeps suggested Cali then!!! Probably all a impossible dream Moving is a huge committment. Downsides to California are that the people are a)generally extremely materialistic or b)extremely conservative we do have great weather though haha, dont get me wrong though there are some great people out here, just hard to find... hm I suppose this could apply anywhere? Nothing is impossible. Word
Cobra_X30 Posted October 31, 2007 Posted October 31, 2007 You get the best of both worlds honey. I have an exotic heritage and I have one of the sexiest accents in the world. Who am I kidding?? Who is Scottish in your family? Who isnt? I swear 200 year tradition the men in my family would go back to scottland to get a wife! Used to own a castle there too! Yes, It is one of the worlds sexiest accents! I mean sure no matter what you say your going to sound uneducated... but thats part of the sexy right? You are sooo loving it!!! Just say yes and get it over with so I can get my pretty dress ready and so Cobra can escort me to the wedding. I'll get my tux tailored!
Lyssa Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 So does this mean this thread is gonna get locked soon? Troutie Jr has left the building??
Lunar Sonata Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 What the heck is all this crap? I get infracted for a marginally snide comment but this stuff slides? Very distracting. Anyway, I was gonna say to the OP and his topic post that it sounds like he wants a man without that annoying penis part. Asking a woman not to be emotional? They were built for that. That's like asking a man not to be machismo... ever! Not gonna happen in this era.
LoisLane Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Oh come on... you're just being a sour grape. He's telling it like it is and from the sound of it, he has met quite a number of female who is the non-emotional type.
bigheartkindsoul Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 What the heck is all this crap? I get infracted for a marginally snide comment but this stuff slides? Very distracting. Anyway, I was gonna say to the OP and his topic post that it sounds like he wants a man without that annoying penis part. Asking a woman not to be emotional? They were built for that. That's like asking a man not to be machismo... ever! Not gonna happen in this era. Females are more emotional than males, however some less than others. Even the hard nosed ones that say they have no emotions do, and cry, get upset, have feelings for others. They just do't like the world to see it. IMO - i could be wrong.
Lyssa Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 What the heck is all this crap? I get infracted for a marginally snide comment but this stuff slides? Very distracting. Anyway, I was gonna say to the OP and his topic post that it sounds like he wants a man without that annoying penis part. Asking a woman not to be emotional? They were built for that. That's like asking a man not to be machismo... ever! Not gonna happen in this era. I think what Troutie Jr is trying to get across when he says leave the emotions out of it, is the assumptions that come with the emotions. Women tend to get overly dramatic saying something like "but I thought you like me and you wanted to be with me" rather than something like "I would like to know where this is heading". Troutie Jr made it quite evident in his post to ASK THE QUESTION.
popey Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Why not? This is LoveShack! LOL. I doubt that is his exact intent. Please remember that when we interact with others within a certain context we view them only one way. We humans are much more multi-dimensional than you will see here. I'm a perfect example. Attitude, Looks, Integrity, Status, Intelligence, Humor, Gentleness. Put me on paper and I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread! However there are just a handful of issues regarding trust and intimacy, that completely wipe out the positives. Its taken me a few years to realize I'm the one with the fatal flaw! It isnt about just finding the right girl. Does that make sense? makes more sense then i care to admit... to myself!
popey Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Hi there. Do men like you exist out there? What I mean is are there more men like you in the real world? Where is the real world anyway? Guys don't give honest answers when asked questions, especially when it comes to figures, clothes, future or even sex. You just sound too good to be true. For me anyway because I have been burned too many times to actually belief that men like you still exist. not taking anything away from Trouttie, here; but I think that men posessing things he is talking about/displaying here are not AS rare as we may tend to think. For instance; I once dated a guy who asked me in conversation during our 2nd date, what I thought a player was. I told him someone who decieves a woman into thinking he has more invested then he does so he can keep her and others stringing along. thereafter, we dated regularly for 2 monthes, sometimes spending whole weekends together, meeting eachothers friends and family, went on a vacation together. I really felt like we were very "boyfriendy-girlfriendy". that's how it seemed to all my friends. But in the end, when i asked "what are we doing? b/c I'm feeling like we have something real and special and like I would like to express a committment." He answered, "I like things the way they are." He essentially asked on date 2, what- by MY definition would costitute "playing me", and then never violated that. he just enjoyed me/us for what it was to him. I was decieved but not by his doing. It was by my perception of what our type of interaction, and my feelings mean.
coco_milkshake Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Who isnt? I swear 200 year tradition the men in my family would go back to scottland to get a wife! Used to own a castle there too! Yes, It is one of the worlds sexiest accents! I mean sure no matter what you say your going to sound uneducated... but thats part of the sexy right? I'll get my tux tailored! That bit had me in stitches. :lmao: So are you going to come to Scotland and find a wife if you cant find a partner there?? The Coco is a good choice. Cool!!! I will go buy this really stunning dress Ive had my eye on for weeks.
Lyssa Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Do I hear wedding bells?? Bridesmaid... *ooh pick me! pick me!!*
coco_milkshake Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Do I hear wedding bells?? Bridesmaid... *ooh pick me! pick me!!* Sure.
Author troutie jr Posted November 1, 2007 Author Posted November 1, 2007 Time to kill.... Nice to see people enjoying themselves When I made a comment about asking a question and “leaving the emotions” out of it, why is that so difficult to understand? I would think that two people can communicate effectively without bringing their emotions into asking a question. This is the dating Forum right? How can a person’s emotions get so far invested in a date or a few dates? I can say that if a woman got her emotions wrapped up in me so quickly I would think she is either needy or desperate Or’ Is confused with knowing the difference between physical chemistry, lust and love. Whatever the reason, I am not to blame for her characteristics. I am sure that there are Men and women who tell people what they want to hear for the sake of sex, but I am not one of them. That is a game that I don’t play whether I am dating or in a relationship. What’s the point? That sets a precedent of a future that I am not interested in having. In a relationship, yeah! There are emotions invested because there is also time invested. That is when emotions need to be heard. But last time I looked, I was in the dating forum.
plainoldjared Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 When I made a comment about asking a question and “leaving the emotions” out of it, why is that so difficult to understand? I would think that two people can communicate effectively without bringing their emotions into asking a question. This is the dating Forum right? How can a person’s emotions get so far invested in a date or a few dates? I can say that if a woman got her emotions wrapped up in me so quickly I would think she is either needy or desperate Or’ Is confused with knowing the difference between physical chemistry, lust and love. Whatever the reason, I am not to blame for her characteristics. I am sure that there are Men and women who tell people what they want to hear for the sake of sex, but I am not one of them. That is a game that I don’t play whether I am dating or in a relationship. What’s the point? That sets a precedent of a future that I am not interested in having. In a relationship, yeah! There are emotions invested because there is also time invested. That is when emotions need to be heard. But last time I looked, I was in the dating forum. Troutie, I follow what you're saying here and I agree with you to a certain extent. I absolutely agree that any sign of emotional attachment or neediness early on in the dating can be a turnoff, however, if you (figuratively speaking) are dating several people (goes for both men and women) on several occasions emotions are bound to get involved. Its human nature to crave emotional reciprocation from any sort of relationship. What I mean by relationship here is any 1 on 1 interaction, whether its business related, platonic or romantic. Eitherway emotions are bound to get involved, the key is to stay honest open and brave enough to say what you mean and mean what you say. Even if you arent interested in a committed relationship and are just dating whatever the case I think its wishful/hopeful thinking...
Author troutie jr Posted November 1, 2007 Author Posted November 1, 2007 Do I hear wedding bells?? Bridesmaid... *ooh pick me! pick me!!* I'll pick you alright Lyssa.... I'll not only pick you, I'll pamper you
bigheartkindsoul Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Time to kill.... Nice to see people enjoying themselves A genuine sorry hun for this, please do not hold it against me/us. ((((hugs)))
Author troutie jr Posted November 1, 2007 Author Posted November 1, 2007 Troutie, I follow what you're saying here and I agree with you to a certain extent. I absolutely agree that any sign of emotional attachment or neediness early on in the dating can be a turnoff, however, if you (figuratively speaking) are dating several people (goes for both men and women) on several occasions emotions are bound to get involved. Its human nature to crave emotional reciprocation from any sort of relationship. What I mean by relationship here is any 1 on 1 interaction, whether its business related, platonic or romantic. Eitherway emotions are bound to get involved, the key is to stay honest open and brave enough to say what you mean and mean what you say. Even if you arent interested in a committed relationship and are just dating whatever the case I think its wishful/hopeful thinking... I agree emotions are part of being human. A person would have to be made of ice not to feel something. I do think a person is in control of their emotions when logic is being used. I am talking about people who fall to hard to fast and then blame another person when they are the ones who have the control. Have you crossed the sea yet and met your date? I got a kick out of that:cool:
Lyssa Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 I'll pick you alright Lyssa.... I'll not only pick you, I'll pamper you *Where is that 'blush' emoticon when I need one!!!* **blush** That's very sweet of you, Troutie Jr. I'm sure I would be pampered.. as your chosen one's bridesmaid?
Author troutie jr Posted November 1, 2007 Author Posted November 1, 2007 A genuine sorry hun for this, please do not hold it against me/us. ((((hugs))) Not at all. I enjoyed the read.
Lyssa Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 Eitherway emotions are bound to get involved, the key is to stay honest open and brave enough to say what you mean and mean what you say. Even if you arent interested in a committed relationship and are just dating whatever the case I think its wishful/hopeful thinking... That is the key but really, how many men are willing to do that without fearing what their women would do to them? I think not only should one do that during dating a man or woman but when one is exclusive as well.
Author troutie jr Posted November 1, 2007 Author Posted November 1, 2007 That is the key but really, how many men are willing to do that without fearing what their women would do to them? I think not only should one do that during dating a man or woman but when one is exclusive as well. My point exactly. Why be there if one is not on the same page. Why waste time investing emotions into someone who is not compatible. Communication is key to a well worth invested future relationship. If the questions cannot be asked in the beginning, it sets the stage for the future.
plainoldjared Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 That is the key but really, how many men are willing to do that without fearing what their women would do to them? I think not only should one do that during dating a man or woman but when one is exclusive as well. Its difficult and uncomfortable like every other new thing we try, but practice makes perfect and the sooner we all get good at this being honest thing the sooner a lot of uneccessary fights and misunderstandings cease to happen. I realize not everyone wants to be in a committed relationship but isnt dating the act of meeting people and getting to know them so that you might one day be in a committed relationship? I dont think dating can ever be just dating ultimately someone will want more or less and then theres an injured party as a result...
Author troutie jr Posted November 1, 2007 Author Posted November 1, 2007 Its difficult and uncomfortable like every other new thing we try, but practice makes perfect and the sooner we all get good at this being honest thing the sooner a lot of uneccessary fights and misunderstandings cease to happen. I realize not everyone wants to be in a committed relationship but isnt dating the act of meeting people and getting to know them so that you might one day be in a committed relationship? I dont think dating can ever be just dating ultimately someone will want more or less and then theres an injured party as a result... Dating is a tool to possibilities of meeting the right person. Don't spend time thinking a person is right, when you know they are not right. Chemistry is important, but it is not the deciding factor for her to be Mrs. Right. There are many other things that need to be considered when seeking a lifetime partner. I can't count how many of my friends who are now separated said, there was that one thing I ignored. That one thing may just be the end and can be comprised of anything that a person thinks they can change or accept. I know what I want and one thing I don't want is thinking I can change or accept something in a person that is not there.
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