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Should I allow my girlfriend to go to a dance with another guy?


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I guess the distinction we are looking for, is the methodology. Most men just walk up to a woman, start talking and hope for the best. A player, as I understand it, is a guy who is aware of basic female psychology and playing it. A bit devious, perhaps, but also perfectly respectable as long as you don't lie or play mind games.

 

Well then to you, I would be considered a player.:laugh:

 

That sounds like a perfectly capable guy. No argument here.

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then you will sleep in a bed by yourself.....women need to be dominated and controlled by men.

You need to be beaten by a woman

 

exactly...this RIDDLER person is like 23 years old and is quite naive and inexperienced with females and life in general.

Thats pretty funny, he seems much more mature than you....

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Well then to you, I would be considered a player.:laugh:

 

That sounds like a perfectly capable guy. No argument here.

 

Glad we agree. Happy playing.

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Glad we agree. Happy playing.

 

B4, I just sunk your battleship.:laugh:

 

I am involved with someone already, so no "playing" will be happening on my part.

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Trialbyfire

To the OP,

You don't allow your girl to go anywhere...

 

If you've expressed your concern clearly and she's not factoring you into the equation, you know where you stand with her. That she's worried about everyone else's approval is a sign of immaturity or someone with self-esteem issues.

 

An LDR needs far more trust and commitment than an in-person relationship. It just seems like more room for problems than advantages. Also, an LDR appears to be all about fantasy.

 

The only time an LDR seems worthwhile to me is if the two of you are continuing an in-person relationship but can't due to a physical move by one party. At least this way, you will have some idea of who that person really is.

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  1. you have no choice but to "trust" him
  2. LDRs really are not real relationships and ususally fail

 

Hey dude,

 

Please think before you say...

1) trust is not something u choose..im in LDR and i trust my man because i know him. It is something developed between us from time to time. I dont choose to trust him just cuz we r away. I wont even be with him if i have to choose to trust

2) When we meet once in a while we r just like every other couples. And when we are away We think of each other all the time, talk to each other whenever we can and dream about our future together. How is this not a relationship? It actually proves our relationship more, going through such things for something that is going to happen in the future.

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  1. you have no choice but to "trust" him
  2. LDRs really are not real relationships and ususally fail

 

i want to add more on my quote....most of the people who are reading this forum are the people who are actually seeking support for what they are going through. So what you said here is just so mean. It actually hurts and can let us down if u say it just like that.

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Sweetie2007
God that is so true ERIK

 

No, that's not true..the Riddler was right: to play a woman means BS and lies, plain and simple!

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Sweetie2007
1. How does she have no choice but to trust him?

2. Yes, LDRs are real relationships and they do not usually fail, plenty of people here are in successful ones - mine did not start off long distance but it has been for 2 years, and in 6 months I'm moving to be with him. How is that not working?

 

I asked him the same question Catrocks, he never answered me...maybe he will you (i haven't read that far yet).......

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Sweetie2007
Why are you even posting in the long distance relationship forum? Are you just generally annoying or is it just that you're bored?

 

no, he just made a stupid sexist comment, then couldn't think of anything to back up his BS, so he typed w/e hoping it would shut me up...didn't work...:o

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no, he just made a stupid sexist comment, then couldn't think of anything to back up his BS, so he typed w/e hoping it would shut me up...didn't work...:o

I look forward to your 87th post with much glee :)

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Sweetie2007
I look forward to your 87th post with much glee :)

 

Wow..so you've posted a lot more than me...big deal. doesn't mean that I don't have opinions or standards, or that I'm new to the relationship thing. I may be young, but I still don't like people who post stupid sexist comments, or stupid comments in general, and then don't back them up, if your going to say something, then say what you mean and back it up, don't resort to w/e, imo

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I look forward to your 87th post with much glee :)

Awww could you not think of a cleverer comment? I guess it's to be expected from reading the rest of your posts though

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Calm down, girls.

 

Seems like you hit a sore spot, Alphamale.

I think it's funny actually ;)

 

-Let me rephrase - it started off as offensive but now he's obviously run out of things to say but still has to have the last word, so the posts are now funny - if that makes sense lol

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Sweetie2007
I think it's funny actually ;)

 

-Let me rephrase - it started off as offensive but now he's obviously run out of things to say but still has to have the last word, so the posts are now funny - if that makes sense lol

 

I agree...although the offensive comments i still haven't forgotten...

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Ok, I'll jump in.

 

It's a question of respect and boundaries. If she is your girlfriend, then she doesn't go on DATES. You have the right to expect that.

 

Now, if YOU and she decide that it's okay for her to go with this guy as FRIENDS, then that's a different story. It's something you have negotiated together and you are either okay with it, or not. If not, she shouldn't want to go. If you say it's cool to go, then:

 

He must know about you being her boyfriend. In that case, he won't be allowed to think of it as a date....but it's really your girlfriend's job to put out the "NOT welcome" mat instead of the "welcome mat."

 

I would never go out in any situation and present myself as single when I'm not.

 

Are you sure there's still no attraction between the two of them? I personally wouldn't want my boyfriend to go out on a date with a woman he has told me he was once attracted to...especially if he's feeling lonely in a LDR.

 

It's a matter of you telling her how you want to be treated. Relationships are full of expectations. She should care more about how you feel than this other guy, don't you think?

 

If she goes, then how about setting something similar up on your end with one of your "friends." Just make sure you mention how "hot" everyone thinks she is.

 

(Really, LDRs are so painful most of the time. Been there done that myself. Trust is so easily shattered when you aren't together. Both parties have to be extra protective of the relationship.)

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Sorry, I just realized that the dance was yesterday. How did it all play out?

I was wondering that too, we never heard back whether she was still going to the dance with this guy or not.

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blondegirl30
Sorry, I just realized that the dance was yesterday. How did it all play out?

Yes, I'm dying to know how it all played out? Did she or didn't she go??

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