Community Forums

Reload this Page Community Forums > Platonic > Business and Professional Relationships

I nailed it baby!!!!!!

Business and Professional Relationships Networking and maintaining a positive environment in the work place is important! Surviving the 9-to-5 within.

LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 3rd November 2009, 5:07 PM   #361
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 26,423
Originally Posted by Lauriebell82 View Post
That article is more about being laid off/fired. I read a good article on some ways to respond. I didn't let any of the employers really "think" I quit, I disguised it by saying that "the job didn't work out." That's pretty much code for being fired. NOBODY wants to hire someone who has been fired, that's just the facts. And the problem is that the competition is so fierce and jobs are so scarce that they are going to hire someone who didn't get fired over someone who did.
Did you even bother reading the entire article?

Most importantly, detach yourself from the event and honestly examine what happened. That's the only way you're going to get any insight and begin adjusting your thoughts and perspective.

There are hundreds of reasons for dismissal, so no pat answer will suffice. The unequivocal rule is to tell the truth. If they discover you lied, you'll be wondering for a long time how you'll pay your bills. So when you're asked why you left – tell them you were fired. Forthright brevity is best. It's all in how you phrase it. The trick is a shift in perspective, which is easier when you've purged the defensiveness and shame.

Don't give a long, rambling story or blame the company, your boss, or anyone else. Were you –even partially- at fault? Take responsibility. Did you learn from the experience? Say so. Are you completely at sea as to what happened? That's okay.

Not every job is right for everyone. There are philosophical differences, chemistry problems, tough spots, and bosses who are difficult and self-absorbed.

Regardless of the reason, it wasn't your perfect job or you weren't quite what they needed. The great thing is that it was recognized (in whatever form) and everyone is moving on. The goal is to be real about what works for you and why the firing took place.

The first step, as trite as it sounds, is to look at it as a blessing. It may take some time to see, but no matter how bad it looks or feels, something good will come of it. Maybe it will be a better job, a chance to grow, or the realization that you hated your career – who knows?

But if you're too busy being angry and defensive, not only will you miss the chance to capitalize on the positive outcome, but you'll also keep experiencing negative consequences. When you're in a victimized frame of mind, you'll miss recognizing an opportunity and continue to perpetuate your unemployment.

Let's examine two answers to the question: "Why did you leave your last job?"

HOLDING-ON HENRIETTA: I don't know. I was doing my job. Everyone liked me. They always came to me for advice instead of our boss. When the other manager left, they promoted the assistant. She's maybe about 28. I guess they thought she'd be good just because she'd been there a long time, but she really was a shrew. I think she hated me. She was always talking down to me. One time she took credit for one of my projects. She's the one that should have left! I'm glad to be out of there.

OBJECTIVE OLIVIA: I was fired, actually. The assistant manager was promoted to manager because she had seniority and she was very good at her job. Unfortunately, she was young and perhaps she thought respect was automatically accorded instead of earned, because when everyone else began coming to me instead of her, it didn't seem to sit well with her. Despite that I excelled in my responsibilities and met my goals, she let me go. I'm sorry to have had to leave the company. I learned a lot there.

Can you spot the differences? As the interviewer, what would you think?
Right now, you're Henrietta. Until you turn your response into an Olivia, you're going to continue having this problem.

Getting fired isn't the end of the world, LB. Plenty of people are fired, and do get rehired - if they didn't, unemployment would be at like 40%! People who are fired are eventually hired despite the experience because they're honest and demonstrate that they learned from the experience. If they made a mistake, the explain the mistake, what they learned from it, and assure that it will never happen again. If there were outside circumstances (say, something affecting attendance), they explain how the circumstances have changed such that they can guarantee good attendance.

Yes, you're giving code language for being fired, but you're not demonstrating that you learned from it and getting fired was actually the right thing for you. In doing this, you look like you're putting your stubborn little head in the sand, resistant to personal growth and development.
Star Gazer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd November 2009, 10:51 PM   #362
Established Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 8,475
LB, this is getting frustrating. I want to see you succeed but I feel like you're really not getting it
the problem with logic is there's too many loopholes
and the problem with truth is that it's usually brutal
allina is offline   Reply With Quote


Thread Tools
Display Modes


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Baby on the Way with MM???! StoneyHeart The Other Man / Woman 10 17th September 2006 10:25 AM
my baby is gone LuvHurts43 Breaks and Breaking Up 1 11th August 2006 2:58 AM
Baby Momma's & Baby Daddy's!!??? PlentyLV007 Dating 13 11th April 2006 11:53 AM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 5:29 AM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.

Copyright © 1997-2018 All Rights Reserved.