Sand&Water Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Why is my finger not clicking the damn button???? Because you're a Thinker. If you were a gutless coward, you wouldn't be in this situation.
alphamale Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Why is my finger not clicking the damn button???? Damn carpel tunnel syndrome!
2sunny Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Because things that are hard are just DAMN HARD! It is called LIFE, now go LIVE!
Author CaliGuy Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 Because you're a Thinker. If you were a gutless coward, you wouldn't be in this situation. I guess I am realizing the repercussion of this boundary. Well, it's high time I let go of the past. LOL@Alpha. Damn carpel tunnel
shelters Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I might have missed the details of when you got this email from her Mom, but if you just got it today who says you have to reply right away? You could always send the email to yourself, move your thoughts on to something/anything else for the remainder of the day and revisit it tomorrow with a fresh head. The send button will always be there. Good luck with whatever you decide to do though!
Vertex Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Well, you know, it just takes so much energy. Pressing that mouse button and all.
Art_Critic Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I guess I am realizing the repercussion of this boundary. There is no true repercussion. Unless you think moving on without your ex is a repercusssion.. I would think that you making decisions that are good for you would be living well...
Art_Critic Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 but if you just got it today who says you have to reply right away? don't put it off... this is not a new problem.. it is a new solution
2sunny Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 don't put it off... this is not a new problem.. it is a new solution AC is right - like the ad says - just DO IT !!!! I guarantee you will have some relief when you do....
zarathustra Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Am I'm late!?! Just two cents here... if your ex would feel uncomfortable with her mom sending you info about me, don't you think she would tell her own mother to stop? Anyway, if you don't want to chance it in getting more email, send her the nice email and cut ties. Besides, if you ask her nicely, I'm sure she won't be offended. If you don't care to continue a relationship (friendship) with the ex's mom, offending her helps your cause. Good luck!
alphamale Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I guess I am realizing the repercussion of this boundary. well, just send me the text of the email and the address and I'll send it on your behalf
Sand&Water Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 well, just send me the text of the email and the address and I'll send it on your behalf Alphamale, you have other things on your mind, don't you!?
Author CaliGuy Posted April 18, 2006 Author Posted April 18, 2006 I promise as soon as I am done making a few changes, I will send it then go to lunch.
bendit Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 If I were you I would call the EX and call the MOM. I wouldn't tell the mom anything because that would cut ties with "them" and I don't think you're ready for that yet. I would chat with the X and ask her how everything is. Why would I do this if I were you? Because its clear you WANT to do this. I am in favor of people doing what they want to do in life. Art Critic is right. There is a reason you are still in contact with MOM when you were advised that staying in contact with her would mean her doing stuff like this "accidentaly". So don't tell her to stop. This contact with Mom keeps you close to X and gives you an excuse to talk to her. So I say do it. Call her. Don't PRETEND you don't want to. I am in favor of people doing what they want to do in life. regards
2sunny Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 If I were you I would call the EX and call the MOM. I wouldn't tell the mom anything because that would cut ties with "them" and I don't think you're ready for that yet. I would chat with the X and ask her how everything is. Why would I do this if I were you? Because its clear you WANT to do this. I am in favor of people doing what they want to do in life. Art Critic is right. There is a reason you are still in contact with MOM when you were advised that staying in contact with her would mean her doing stuff like this "accidentaly". So don't tell her to stop. This contact with Mom keeps you close to X and gives you an excuse to talk to her. So I say do it. Call her. Don't PRETEND you don't want to. I am in favor of people doing what they want to do in life. regards Jeeeeeezzzzzzz!!!!!!!!
Art_Critic Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Art Critic is right. There is a reason you are still in contact with MOM when you were advised that staying in contact with her would mean her doing stuff like this "accidentaly". I like this part .. but the whole quote is accurate
2sunny Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I like this part That kind of sh*t is never an accident..... it has a specific purpose.....
alphamale Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Because its clear you WANT to do this. I am in favor of people doing what they want to do in life. doing what you want is fine within reason. doing what you want when it will be detrimental is bad. if some dude WANTS to molest 12 year old boys then that does not mean he should do it.
bendit Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Oh yeah but contact is harmless...and besides SHE contacted first so TECHNICALLY its not a break of contact. So he can still say he is following the "guide." regards
Sand&Water Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 End result: Snowball Effect, and Nothing gained.
2sunny Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 Oh yeah but contact is harmless...and besides SHE contacted first so TECHNICALLY its not a break of contact. So he can still say he is following the "guide." regards WTF???? why so mean????? WE are here to encourage - not beat somebody down.... If you can't help, then get off the train!
bendit Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I've written a reply and am hovering over the 'send' button. I know when I send it, it could go to the ex but more than that, it's the end to final connection I had to her. I've removed everything from my life that reminded me of her. This is the last piece of the puzzle. So why am I hestating? I want to let go of everything. I need to. Why is my finger not clicking the damn button???? Contacting the ex telling them not to contact is NOT the "last piece of the puzzle". It's simply layering drama on top of drama. Guess what? People actually call folks who told them not to!! Contacting the EX to tell them to NOT CONTACT you is the oldest trick in the book for the ADDICT who can't let go. It gives an excuse to contact, which is of course the desired action. How do you let go? By LETTING GO. Not telling them to DO SOMETHING. regards
pippen_2k Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I think Art Critic said it, but when it comes to your personal well being and happiness, I wouldnt care less if I upset the Ex's mother ( even tho she probably is a fantastic women ). Block the ex's mothers emails and get over this, or remain in the loop and keep the door ever so slightly open, and get hurt. I know ur a preacher of taking care of number one Cali Guy, so why dont you?
alphamale Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I know ur a preacher of taking care of number one Cali Guy, so why dont you? thats an excellent question PIPPEN2K...
Art_Critic Posted April 18, 2006 Posted April 18, 2006 I know ur a preacher of taking care of number one Cali Guy, so why dont you? Because deep down he still loves his ex and wants her back..
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