Author FredEire Posted March 24 Author Share Posted March 24 1 hour ago, Alpacalia said: Oh no. I wasn't implying this is something that is limited to you. It's rather common. I've had the self-awareness to keep track of my own stupid choices. I was just offering that advice bluntly since, as you know, its something that takes time to get past and one way to avoid it is to not continue pursuing connections where the woman is not making herself available. If you're the one doing the pursuing and its too easy, you've probably encountered some weird outlier of a nice person whose kindness you're not accustomed to. Doesn't mean she's necessarily what you think she is or that she's NOT closed off emotionally but in general, if there's just one person doing the pursuing and they're doing it because the other person disengaged, it's probably a huge waste of time that isn't going to go anywhere. Yeah, I mean in this case there was glimpses of it as in she wanted to stay on longer on the first date, she came to see my open mic show when I had only mentioned in in passing etc, but if someone's only half in they're out I actually went on another date today with a girl who I saw a month ago last because she was on holiday, she texted me unprompted asking when we were meeting up basically. It went quite well and I didn't leave with any sense that she wouldn't want to go on a third date, it's quite a different feeling. So yeah that girl deserves a lot more of my time and attention than the one in OP, so that's how I'm going to play it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted March 25 Share Posted March 25 11 hours ago, FredEire said: Yeah, I mean in this case there was glimpses of it as in she wanted to stay on longer on the first date, she came to see my open mic show when I had only mentioned in in passing etc, but if someone's only half in they're out I actually went on another date today with a girl who I saw a month ago last because she was on holiday, she texted me unprompted asking when we were meeting up basically. It went quite well and I didn't leave with any sense that she wouldn't want to go on a third date, it's quite a different feeling. So yeah that girl deserves a lot more of my time and attention than the one in OP, so that's how I'm going to play it. Well done on two good dates with someone more suitable and seemingly more committed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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