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Trouble figuring out what this women wants from me?


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SlimShadysWife
15 hours ago, Wiseone72 said:

Maybe this girl has a bizarre way of making friends, but targeting a specific guy she doesn't even know just to be a friend, weird, weird.

I also happen to be her type, from a physical standpoint, tall, handsome, beautiful lips. Clearly my physical traits is why she chose me. I can see that clear as day!

Yep she's a sugar baby. Targeting older men. And you don't have to be rich rich.....that's a misconception.

 

She ready said that on her Instagram. 

Edited by SlimShadysWife
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Rider on the Storm
2 hours ago, Wiseone72 said:

I have been serious ill for decades, got a diagnosis and began treating the disease. So yes my inner circle is limited. I'm very particular about the type of people I choose to befriend. I'm not the type to go out drinking with the buddies. I'm into my health, gym 7 days a week, no fast/junk food. 

I got another girl in the gym doing the same thing this girls was doing, she obviously wants my attention, only I'm not interested.  I caught this girl staring at me in the mirror multiple times for months on end. If I make eye contact with her she starts walking right towards me, like a charging bull, making eye contact the entire time as she walks by. She has done this many, many times. I smile, but not interested.

When I started working out with this girl, the other girl was staring at us for a long time and smiled. 

I got girls at work doing the same kinds of things to get my attention. Everywhere I go this happens. 

I'm not the desperate type, I take a long time and calculate before I make my move.

 

First and foremost, I'm sorry to hear about your medical condition. I wish you well.

On another note, that's really cool that, despite being 52 years old, beautiful, young women want you wherever you go. Being as though that is the case, why are you wasting your time with a woman who has a boyfriend and isn't interested in you outside of the gym? Usually, high value men with prospects don't waste their time pursuing someone who is unavailable.

 

Edited by Rider on the Storm
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2 hours ago, Wiseone72 said:

. I need to take a step back and let it in the we're just gym/Instagram buddies. I think that's the best move for me.

Yes. Please step back. Especially scanning her social media. Enjoy the friendship at the gym. I disagree that because she has an older BF that she's a golddigger. However I also disagree that she's interested in you beyond friendship. 

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Alpacalia
3 hours ago, Wiseone72 said:

I agree. I need to take a step back and let it in the we're just gym/Instagram buddies. I think that's the best move for me.

It's really the best for you. I'm not sure where the idea that she is looking for a man to support her financially is coming from especially considering she has not asked anything from you? I think you might be reading into things a bit too much.

She is probably just enjoying your company at the gym and on Instagram. Just because a woman is friendly and enjoys spending time with a man, doesn't automatically mean she has romantic feelings for him. Let her actions guide your interactions and don't jump to conclusions. To that point I will say that given you've developed romantic feelings towards her it would be for the best you end it before you get any more entangled with her.

This friendly thing is torture for you and hardly the way to find someone who is available to be with you. You've got other choices. Cut your losses and walk away. 

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Wiseone72
On 2/1/2024 at 10:40 AM, Wiseman2 said:

Enjoy the friendship at the gym.

Exactly!

On 2/1/2024 at 10:36 AM, Rider on the Storm said:

On another note, that's really cool that, despite being 52 years old, beautiful, young women want you wherever you go.

This happened only once I optimized my lifestyle and physic through hormone therapy. Women can sense high testosterone in men. The confidence and the way I carry myself bleeds through for all to see. 

Six months ago, before the hormone therapy, women never took a second look at me!

Edited by Wiseone72
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49 minutes ago, Wiseone72 said:

Six months ago, before the hormone therapy, women never took a second look at me!

Is this prescribed? Perhaps talk to your physician about all these cognitive side effects? 

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Goodguy05

Seems to be an attention seeker. I wouldn't waste anymore time with her if you are looking for a relationship. It's hard work being just a friend to a woman you find attractive. Nothing in it for you that's the way I see it 

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dancehead

[ ] So what if she's 25 and [you are] 52. Her bf is even older! Girls from this part of the world see it as normal to date much older men. Stay in touch, enjoy working out with her and be her friend. You don't know what may change later. Try to see her outside the gym go for a drink afterwards

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Alpacalia
On 2/3/2024 at 1:40 PM, Wiseone72 said:

Women can sense high testosterone in men.

I think there may be a shred of truth to that. I dated someone and he just oozed testosterone.  It manifested in different ways.  Well, he was a serious rock climber, maybe four times a week. He was always buzzing and ready to go. The most fearless person I've ever known; any fears he had felt like a ruse, to get out of doing something.

Peak, him climbing challenging rock. He was also energetic in other ways. We dated probably a few months, and a part of me craved his high energy. I didn't know anything about testosterone back then. But I thought, chasing testosterone primarily in a romantic relationship is kind of futile because it means his desires are focused on some figment of masculinity that he hopes he can get, and I want reality not some aspirational figment of masculinity that he hasn't attained.  

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4 hours ago, Alpacalia said:

I think there may be a shred of truth to that. I dated someone and he just oozed testosterone.  It manifested in different ways.  Well, he was a serious rock climber, maybe four times a week. He was always buzzing and ready to go. The most fearless person I've ever known; any fears he had felt like a ruse, to get out of doing something.

Peak, him climbing challenging rock. He was also energetic in other ways. We dated probably a few months, and a part of me craved his high energy. I didn't know anything about testosterone back then. But I thought, chasing testosterone primarily in a romantic relationship is kind of futile because it means his desires are focused on some figment of masculinity that he hopes he can get, and I want reality not some aspirational figment of masculinity that he hasn't attained.  

 

Oozing testosterone isn't necessarily always a good thing. Hopefully the OP is indeed only taking the injections as prescribed and isn't self medicating himself.

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Wiseone72
On 2/3/2024 at 3:32 PM, Goodguy05 said:

Seems to be an attention seeker. I wouldn't waste anymore time with her if you are looking for a relationship.

It's already over with, we both said goodbye. The one time she asked me to workout with her, I said I couldn't that day and planned it for the next day to accommodate her and has since then has stood me up and been distant or cold towards me.

 

She doesn't like being told NO! I had a good reason, my mothers 88th birthday, I couldn't cancer that for her.

 

On 2/3/2024 at 2:30 PM, Wiseman2 said:

Is this prescribed? Perhaps talk to your physician about all these cognitive side effects?

Yes, by an endocrinologist. Jaetnzo is a new oral testosterone undecanoate. It's very expensive though.

 

On 2/5/2024 at 6:59 PM, Sony12 said:

Hopefully the OP is indeed only taking the injections as prescribed and isn't self medicating himself.

Medically supervised. Type 2 diabetes fried my natural production which may be reversible. If I can reverse it, cure it through diet and lifestyle, I may be able to come off and regain my natural hormone levels.

 

For he record, TRT doesn't increase risk or heart attack if the Traverse study is any indication, and 53% reduced risk of developing  prostate cancer and reoccurrence.

 

On 2/5/2024 at 2:38 PM, Alpacalia said:

He was also energetic in other ways. 

My hematocrit 3 days ago was 58.5%, ranges 45-50%. I think I'm dehydrated. Parts of the population in Bolivia have ranges 45-61%.

Edited by Wiseone72
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Wiseone72
On 2/5/2024 at 2:38 PM, Alpacalia said:

Peak, him climbing challenging rock. He was also energetic in other ways. 

I know for a fact the women are attracted to my energy, I walk so damn fast. I come from a family of joggers and fast walkers. I attack my workouts with such intensity is draws looks from others.

I don't hold back!

Maybe all this energy is channeled through my ADHD and Tourette syndrome, for which I'm not symptomatic from a mental standpoint any longer. People with ADHD are known to have endless energy. 

Edited by Wiseone72
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Wiseone72
On 2/5/2024 at 2:31 PM, dancehead said:

So what if she's 25 and [you are] 52. Her bf is even older! Girls from this part of the world see it as normal to date much older men. Stay in touch, enjoy working out with her and be her friend. You don't know what may change later. Try to see her outside the gym go for a drink afterwards

I'll still see her in the gym once weekly, but beyond that I won't see her.

She was nice enough to train me these last few weeks and even said we can meet on Tuesday for one last time to show me other workouts and say goodbye.

I think I'll pass on it.

She definitely craves the attention and I know that's what all of this was about, and she knew full well she wouldn't commit because I confirmed she does have a boyfriend. Her claiming to wanting a friend was BS, it was all about getting attention, now she's had her fun. 

Her boyfriend is an unattractive obese 59 year old Russian. The same guy filming her Instagram videos for over 2 years.

Sugar daddy anyone...?

Edited by Wiseone72
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Alpacalia
4 hours ago, Wiseone72 said:

I know for a fact the women are attracted to my energy, I walk so damn fast. I come from a family of joggers and fast walkers. I attack my workouts with such intensity is draws looks from others.

I don't hold back!

Maybe all this energy is channeled through my ADHD and Tourette syndrome, for which I'm not symptomatic from a mental standpoint any longer. People with ADHD are known to have endless energy. 

Hi energy or hi restlessness? I think I takes some effort for others to keep up and deal with like day in and day out.

I dated someone with very high energy and I was like...Slow down horsey!!!

I think I was talking more in terms of a focus on masculine traits that are often associated with higher testosterone levels, such strength, athleticism, and assertiveness, rather than just general energy levels. But I can definitely see how having high energy and being physically active can also be attractive qualities. 

Edited by Alpacalia
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Wiseone72
1 hour ago, Alpacalia said:

Hi energy or hi restlessness?

My body wants to move, not be still. Run Forest run type energy. I see people at the gym chuckle as I walk by, or the facial expressions say it all. 

 

1 hour ago, Alpacalia said:

I think I was talking more in terms of a focus on masculine traits that are often associated with higher testosterone levels, such strength, athleticism, and assertiveness, rather than just general energy levels.

I'm a mesomorph, before I ever set foot in a gym, I already had muscle, tennis ball biceps, shoulders, and especially legs! I've got a good amount of body hair, not too much though, on the arms and legs. I've got strength, explosive power for my size. I'm athletic, 6 foot, optimal weight 160 and fast, agile and very coordinated.

I would have been a great athlete or obstacle course competitor! I won survival of the fittest in high school, first place. 

My situational awareness is outstanding! I'll stand my ground when it's appropriate. I drive fast and I'm an aggressive driver. 

 

 

1 hour ago, Alpacalia said:

I dated someone with very high energy and I was like...Slow down horsey!!!

That's me, but without being hyper,. I have the ability to hyperfocus on one thing, but can also multitask. The TRT has a calming effect on me at least and cured my mental ADHD

 

 

Edited by Wiseone72
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Alpacalia
23 minutes ago, Wiseone72 said:

My body wants to move, not be still. Run Forest run type energy. I see people at the gym chuckle as I walk by, or the facial expressions say it all. 

 

I'm a mesomorph, before I ever set foot in a gym, I already had muscle, tennis ball biceps, shoulders, and especially legs! I've got a good amount of body hair, not too much though, on the arms and legs. I've got strength, explosive power for my size. I'm athletic, 6 foot, optimal weight 160 and fast, agile and very coordinated.

I would have been a great athlete or obstacle course competitor! I won survival of the fittest in high school, first place. 

My situational awareness is outstanding! I'll stand my ground when it's appropriate. I drive fast and I'm an aggressive driver. 

 

 

That's me, but without being hyper,. I have the ability to hyperfocus on one thing, but can also multitask. The TRT has a calming effect on me at least and cured my mental ADHD

 

 

I have a relative with ADHD. Sometimes when we talk on the phone they will go on these long tangents about different topics, jumping from one to the next without any real connection between them. It can be frustrating because I don't always know how to respond or contribute to the conversation. So what I do is ask them to slow down. Anyway, I think we're going off topic. It sounds like you and this lady are kaput. I think she got the hint that you wanted to be more than friends and the fact that she's constantly reminding you that she has a boyfriend just reinforces that. 

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Wiseone72

My hematocrit on TRT is anywhere between 51-58.5%, at sea level. My vascular system has optimal oxygen transport, which occurs at higher than normal hematocrit. 

Edited by Wiseone72
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Wiseone72
Just now, Alpacalia said:

I have a relative with ADHD. Sometimes when we talk on the phone they will go on these long tangents about different topics, jumping from one to the next without any real connection between them.

I'm controlled, calm, you wouldn't know I have ADHD or Tourette syndrome. I outgrew it years ago along with my Tourette syndrome. When people find out through a relative, their like really!

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Wiseone72

Well it appears things have changed with this girl. I sent her a heartfelt goodbye thanking her for training me and said goodbye. The response wasn't what I expected, she wasn't happy about that goodbye text. Apparently she doesn't want me out of her life just yet. So I agreed to continue working out with her and have notice some things have changed gears.

She said I know you've noticed I've changed my workout routine for you.. 

When I screw up with her, miscommunication on day and time of training or assume something, without confirming it with her, bad planning, miss a workout session, she pulls away, spending less time with me.  

When I do right by her, she spends more time with me. I just started being more assertive with her, planning out workout days. Before I would ask her or expect her to plan the workout sessions and it rarely ever happened, lucky if once weekly. This has changed things profoundly with her.

So a few days ago I started texting her, "tomorrow, 10 am gym, yes or no?" I'm always getting a response now, unlike before and she trying her damnist to fit me into her schedule now, in other words going out of her way to meet up with me almost every day.

I'm going to see where this leads, no expectations, this way I don't set myself up for disappointment. .

 

 

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Wiseone72

I notice the only time she mentions her boyfriend is if I do something wrong that displeases her as explained in the previous post. If I do right by her, things are going smoothly, she never mentions her boyfriend. So when the boyfriend comment is present in conversations, it's her way of her showing displeasure in my actions/inactions. 

Edited by Wiseone72
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It's good you improved your communication as far as meeting up at specific times for work outs. There's no reason for her to mention her BF to you because you don't really have a personal or romantic relationship with her. Perhaps she is getting better boundaries rather than trying to be too friendly and you misinterpreting that. 

Edited by Wiseman2
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1 hour ago, Wiseone72 said:

Well it appears things have changed with this girl. I sent her a heartfelt goodbye thanking her for training me and said goodbye. The response wasn't what I expected, she wasn't happy about that goodbye text. Apparently she doesn't want me out of her life just yet. So I agreed to continue working out with her and have notice some things have changed gears.

She said I know you've noticed I've changed my workout routine for you.. 

When I screw up with her, miscommunication on day and time of training or assume something, without confirming it with her, bad planning, miss a workout session, she pulls away, spending less time with me.  

When I do right by her, she spends more time with me. I just started being more assertive with her, planning out workout days. Before I would ask her or expect her to plan the workout sessions and it rarely ever happened, lucky if once weekly. This has changed things profoundly with her.

So a few days ago I started texting her, "tomorrow, 10 am gym, yes or no?" I'm always getting a response now, unlike before and she trying her damnist to fit me into her schedule now, in other words going out of her way to meet up with me almost every day.

I'm going to see where this leads, no expectations, this way I don't set myself up for disappointment. .

 

 

She does not want anything more than a little bit of attention from you. If she really liked you things would not be that difficult. 

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Alpacalia

So a few things have changed here, assertiveness, taking the lead and more effort on her part.  Better to not take things too seriously. If she doesn't want to train anymore, that's her choice, you'll just have to find another trainer. It's not the end of the world.

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  • 2 months later...
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Wiseone72
Posted (edited)

New update, we are officially dating now. I was right about everything, the boyfriend was made up just like I originally thought!! This guy is her roommate, co-worker. She made him up to test me, she wanted me to chase her knowing full well she has a boyfriend, this test I failed! I ignored her flirting attempts. Suddenly she starts pulling away like I did something wrong.

Six weeks goes by with no contact and I'm in the gym, missing her deeply and so I text her, "you're deeply missed". She replied, "hi how are you, long time no see". I told her I was doing well, you want to workout with me again, she replied, "I prefer to workout alone as I get distracted easily and prefer to workout alone. So I told her I understand, saying if I ever see you in the gym, I might say a quick hello, but leave you alone to workout.

Minutes later I get a bikini photo of her with an OnlyFans account number attached to it. So I go there and see it's $6 to subscribe.  

I'm not happy about this and decide she isn't for me, she wants money. Three weeks goes by and I can't take it anymore. I go to OnlyFans and now I see it's free to subscribe this time around, she changed it!

I go in and comment about her semi nude photos, tell her how beautiful she is and tell her she looks delicious and I need some facetime with her. I also ask her if she wants to know what I will do to her if we were both naked together in the same room. 

Next thing I know I get this very respectable classy photo of her in a dress with a blue, white and yellow flower in her hair. I send her three poems and she comments on how much she loves them, lots of heart emojis.

She wanted me to chase her, prove to her I would do anything to get her!

 

Her guarded, hard to get demeanor is now absent and she's acting like a girlfriend now!!

 

Edited by Wiseone72
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Have you guys actually gone out on official dates? What you described in that post isn't really dating. It's just someone wanting to get attention by sending their pics to people.

And if she wasn't being honest with you then what makes you think she is now? Doesn't really sound like someone you should want to date. Testing people in that manner is very childish and creating paywalls to see pics is a giant red flag regardless if they eventually took the paywall down or not.

Edited by Sony12
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