notbroken Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 If you want to go out with him again, just blatantly ask him. If you don't, then don't. No big deal here. It is 2021. It's ok for a woman to ask a man. 1
elaine567 Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 Do these poems he sends you, actually say anything pertinent to you or dating or are they just general poems he wrote at some point?...
Author Gaeta Posted June 30, 2021 Author Posted June 30, 2021 21 minutes ago, elaine567 said: Do these poems he sends you, actually say anything pertinent to you or dating or are they just general poems he wrote at some point?... They're romantic poems talking about nature, sunsets, about love, hope, seduction. I am identified in his poems as Venus or Divinity. (It's hard to translate French poetry in English lol) After my last video he wrote back I will drive him crazy and he can't wait to see me again. I reply It appears you have no difficulties waiting. His reply was oh ya ?!!! This man is 51, he could have picked up the phone to call me since last Thursday. I've stepped down from my cloud. 3
Allupinnit Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 This might be ALMOST as weird as sitting in a restaurant with your ball cap on and hoodie up during the entirety of your first date. Men can't be all this weird, right?? 2
Author Gaeta Posted June 30, 2021 Author Posted June 30, 2021 @Allupinnit Appears I am weirdo magnet. 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 Back when I was online dating, I was once in this situation. Great 1st date and many romantic texts in the week after but not asking me out. I decided to ask him out and he initially agreed, then rescheduled twice, then told me that he is still not over his ex wife but would like to be friends. Texts continued after that until I blocked his number. 1 1
Author Gaeta Posted June 30, 2021 Author Posted June 30, 2021 @Eternal Sunshine: It's probably something like this. Not long ago I initiated the 2nd date with someone, he accepted with enthusiasm, we had that 2nd meeting and he even asked me for a 3rd one and POOF. Gone. At some point it gets too 'real' and they bail.
norealusername Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 The guy does sound weird. He should be at least mentioning the 2nd date by now. Some guys like to not seem 'over eager' so they'll wait a few days, maybe a week tops. Personally, I think all the poetry is just weird. Maybe some women like that, I don't know. I've never sent a poem in my life unless it was pre-written on a card. There's nothing wrong at all with the woman asking the guy out on a date. Try just asking him for the 2nd date and see what happens. If he continues sending poems instead of actual responses, then just next him. =
Alvi Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 43 minutes ago, Gaeta said: They're romantic poems talking about nature, sunsets, about love, hope, seduction. I am identified in his poems as Venus or Divinity. (It's hard to translate French poetry in English lol) Love, hope, seduction? Venus or Divinity? Weird, just plain weird. I could understand if that was after you two dating for a while but after one frigging date???? If that is not love bombing, I don't know what is. 46 minutes ago, Gaeta said: After my last video he wrote back I will drive him crazy and he can't wait to see me again. I reply It appears you have no difficulties waiting. His reply was oh ya ?!!! What kind of response is "oh ya" You heavily hinted that you like to see him and "oh ya" is the best he can come with? lol He still hasn't asked out out. It shouldn't be difficult to ask you out for him, especially with the Canada day and the Long Weekend coming up. Seriously, if you really, really, really like him, then ask him out directly. If not and/or you have other prospects on the horizon, then don't even bother with him. 2
Crazelnut Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 So much angst! It's quite simple -- ask him out for a casual date. Stop with "men like to/should chase" nonsense and just ask him out if you like him. Get out of your head and go on a 2nd date. Reevaluate after that date. 1
Alvi Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 (edited) 29 minutes ago, norealusername said: Personally, I think all the poetry is just weird. Maybe some women like that, I don't know. I've never sent a poem in my I think it is very endearing if there is an actual meaning attached to it. In this particular case, there is none. Edited June 30, 2021 by Alvi 1
Wiseman2 Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 1 hour ago, Gaeta said: This man is 51, he could have picked up the phone to call me since last Thursday. I would have blocked someone asap for sending all this meaningless spam. He seems more like a bot. It's unclear why you are wasting time exchanging videos. 1
Happy Lemming Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 Add me to the camp that thinks this guy is weird... Initially, I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. I'd let one poem or one song slide, but anything more than that and something is not quite right with this guy. Throw him back and keep fishing. 2
Author Gaeta Posted June 30, 2021 Author Posted June 30, 2021 18 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: It's unclear why you are wasting time exchanging videos. I gave it a week. I wouldn't call it wasting time I still made other contact and I got dates set up for the coming days. The video I sent was to entertain myself. 1
poppyfields Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 (edited) My opinion? He's trolling. Gaeta, best to stop validating him, which is what sending the video did. In fact, every response, positive OR negative, validates him. And he's loving the attention, so my advice is stop giving it. Nothing has to be said, simply block or ignore. If me, I'd simply ignore, blocking requires effort. NEXT! Edited June 30, 2021 by poppyfields 2
Happy Lemming Posted June 30, 2021 Posted June 30, 2021 1 hour ago, Gaeta said: @Allupinnit Appears I am weirdo magnet. It's not you... it's on-line dating that is a magnet for weirdo(s). 1
Author Gaeta Posted June 30, 2021 Author Posted June 30, 2021 Thank you all for your time! This one was #8, now lets see what #9 has in store. 6
FMW Posted July 1, 2021 Posted July 1, 2021 Maybe poetry is just his thing and otherwise he's not a good communicator. We all have our quirks. I would probably have tired if it at this point since he hasn't asked you out again. If you're still interested go ahead and ask him out. Whether you do that or wait for him to ask, continue enjoying meeting other men as you are doing. 1
Annonymous1234 Posted July 1, 2021 Posted July 1, 2021 Is his poetry actually any good? . . . I have this image of him on your next date, only conversing with you in rhyming couplets (while walking on the outer side of the pavement.) 1
Author Gaeta Posted July 1, 2021 Author Posted July 1, 2021 2 hours ago, FMW said: If you're still interested go ahead and ask him out. No, my interest has died. I can't keep an interest up very long if it's not mutual. 2 1
Wiseman2 Posted July 1, 2021 Posted July 1, 2021 2 hours ago, Gaeta said: No, my interest has died. I can't keep an interest up very long if it's not mutual. Very understandable. Sending all that canned schmaltz to everyone on his dating mailing list is super creepy. 1
poppyfields Posted July 1, 2021 Posted July 1, 2021 Gaeta, I'm curious if you've received anything since your last? Or have you blocked him, ghosted?
Author Gaeta Posted July 1, 2021 Author Posted July 1, 2021 No I have not heard from him since yesterday morning. I deleted him, did not block him. If he writes back I'll have to ask who is this?. Why would a man contact a woman on a Thursday without inviting her out? Just to waste her time. 3
poppyfields Posted July 1, 2021 Posted July 1, 2021 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Gaeta said: No I have not heard from him since yesterday morning. I deleted him, did not block him. If he writes back I'll have to ask who is this?. Why would a man contact a woman on a Thursday without inviting her out? Just to waste her time. I'm confused now, didn't you already go out with him? Anyway, to answer your question, ego boost, validation. Or for a laugh, guys on the men's site I frequent admitted they enjoy trolling women on line....kinda sick but whatevs. That's why I hate on line. I no longer trust it. Trolling has become quite popular, I'm aware of a few as we speak actually... Edited July 1, 2021 by poppyfields
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